Send me a few short messages.

[1] How many nights, you gently snuggled up to me, stroked my delicate place with your delicate little hand, and sucked my precious body fluids before you put it down. Alas! This damn mosquito!

[2] If there is no wind, the clouds will not move; Fish can't swim without water; If there is no sun, the moon will have no light; If it weren't for you ... stupid people wouldn't exist.

[3] Give you a gift with the heaviest amount of feces since there was feces. You will eat a catty and be full. If you feel that the amount of feces is not enough, please help yourself.

[4] May Day Golden Week! Value-for-money luxury tour, tractor pick-up, mountain climbing tour of Beijiang River, taro digging, sweet potato eating and chicken shit picking! It only costs ten yuan to enter the five-star cowshed (hotel)! Sign up quickly!

[5] Don't panic when you meet a dog on the road. Fight bravely. There will only be three results: first, you win, you are better than the dog; Second, if you lose, you are even worse than a dog; Third, you are even. You are like a dog. QQ:8 17620**)

[6] Butterflies complain that bees have a big belly, and there are so many sweet words in them that they just don't tell me, which is irritating! Bees complain about butterflies, wearing exotic flowers and grasses, and the two antennas on their heads are so long that they just don't send me messages. I'm bored to death!

[7] Love tips, seven precepts after meals: one abstains from smoking, two abstains from eating fruit immediately, three abstains from relaxing, drinking tea immediately under temptation, five abstains from walking in vain, six abstains from taking a bath immediately, and seven abstains from sleeping immediately! Bajie: Do you remember?

[8] After all these years, do you know how hard I have been looking for you? I traveled all over the world just to find a face like yours. This is my business card. Welcome to my plastic surgery hospital at any time! Misleading experts

[9] Hey, almost all people use keyboards instead of pens now. In fact, typing with a keyboard will have a strange thing. If you don't believe me, look at your keyboard. There will be a pig hand on it! Happy April Fool's Day!

[10] [April Fool's Day] Don't think that you can settle down by building a city; Don't think that sowing seeds will lead to a bumper harvest; Don't think that the summit is conquest; Don't think that I have forgotten you. At critical times, such as today, you are my first thought.

[1 1] Welcome to the beauty call station. Press 1 to find local girls, press 2 to find oriental girls, press 3 to find western girls, and press 3 to find homosexuals. Today is April Fool's Day in ............................................................................................................!

[12] Due to the virus found in the SMS network, don't read and receive SMS messages on your mobile phone for nearly a month, remember! The virus is "because of the virus found in the SMS network, don't read and receive SMS on your mobile phone for nearly a month, remember!"

[13] A typical joking activity on April Fool's Day: tie your wallet with a thin thread and throw it on the street, pull this thread in the dark, and once someone finds it, suddenly drag it away!

[14] Dear users, your mobile phone number won the first prize in the prize-winning network access activity in our city, with a bonus of 1 10,000 yuan. Please take your pistol to any bank to collect it. The password is: Freeze!

[15] that day, you cut a pig with a knife, and the pig fled into a dead end. All I heard was that the pig knelt down and begged for mercy from you: "We were born from the same root, so why are you in such a hurry?"

[16] The new four idiots: those who can't commit suicide by hanging themselves in love, those who take medicine without illness or disaster, those who get sick when they find a lady, and those who giggle when they read the text message!

[17] You are a genius-a born fool, graduated from Harvard-Harbin Buddhist College, and you are good-looking-it's really not your fault.

[18] Please don't look down, please turn off your phone. There is really nothing to see. Come on, do you really want to see it? No regrets? Well, you asked for it yourself-you are a pig!

[19] It's really tiring to be alive! Standing and thinking about sleeping, I have to queue up when I get on the bus. Secret love is really painful, eating is tasteless, drinking is easy to get drunk, work is particularly tired, robbery is not enough, I have to pay taxes when I earn money, and I have to pay for texting silly pigs.

[20] I will pay for your happiness; I will make up for your confusion; I will satisfy your greed; I will give in to your willfulness; I love you the most; I am a professional pig farmer! :)

[2 1] Part I: The wind is blowing and the rain is falling. I am waiting for your call back. Bottom line: live for you, die for you, and wait for you all your life. Horizontal batch: sent to the wrong person.

[22] Kangaroos and monkeys were praised by the lion king for jumping high in the forest games, and the bear was criticized and said unconvinced: I will jump over this bridge tomorrow! Lion King: Look at you. You are still on the bridge (you are still watching! )

[23] It is said that a toad jumped out of Taihu Lake today and was run over by a car. I've been worried. I'll text you right away. If you are still alive, please reply to me!

[24] Jianghu knows that you are skilled in martial arts, but you can't be proud. If you do this, you will no longer be a person, but a swordsman! Chivalrous swordsman! Chivalrous swordsman!

[25] Look at you, American head, French waist, Indian nose, Hong Kong foot, no one, ghosts are not ghosts, only one head and two legs. Look at you, grinning at the text message!

[26] On a red and blue day, farmers rushed into the cinema to watch the third-grade film, and their angry shouts shook the earth. The village chief came to ask what was going on, and the farmer said, "People who read short messages are not stars, and we won't pay if we are killed."

[27] Do your fingers itch? That means I miss your caress; Does your lips itch? That means I miss your kiss; Are you itchy ... that means you are dirty, so take a shower!

[28] You are as hardworking as a bee, as beautiful as a butterfly, as loyal as a puppy, as smart as a kitten, as simple and honest as an old cow, and as fierce as a tiger. No wonder people call you ... an animal!

[29] Since ancient times, who has no shit and who defecates without paper? If you don't use toilet paper, are you using your fingers?

[30] It is a gust of wind, but it is so eternal; This is a dream, but it is so real; You bowed your head and said nothing, but I couldn't calm down. Finally, I can't help but say to you, "let me know before farting!" "

[3 1] If there is no wind, the clouds will not move; Fish can't swim without water; If there is no sun, the moon will have no light; If it weren't for you, stupid people wouldn't exist.

[32] I can't eat in the morning because I miss you, I can't eat at noon because I miss you more, I can't eat at night because I miss you crazily, and I can't sleep at night because I am hungry.

[33] I heard that your mobile phone has no SMS function, so I sent this message to try. If you receive it and confirm that it has SMS function and it is not my SMS, please reply to me: I have it, it is yours!

[34] The phone rings, which means I miss you; Second, I miss you so much! Three times, I miss you very much! Four tones, I miss you very much; Five tones-demo, it's time to answer the phone!

[35] I am a lonely tree, standing on the roadside for thousands of years, waiting alone, just because one day you pass by me, I will fall for you, and it is in vain not to smash you.

[36] Beggars beg along the street with monkeys. He told the monkey to laugh, cry, bow and read short messages.

[37] You took part in the ball game that day, and you only scored a volley ball. Before the goalkeeper could react, the goal was scored! We all applaud and cheer for you. You get up and pat your ass and say, damn, the ground is too slippery!

[38] When you pick up the mirror and look at your round face, high nose, charming eyes, sexy mouth and blessed ears, you will sigh loudly-pig!

[39] Many aquatic animals celebrate the birthday of the old dragon king. During the dinner, Prime Minister Turtle took something out of his arms, looked at it and put it back. The dragon king quickly asked, what happened to Prime Minister Gui? Shrimp, soldier and crab will quickly answer: the old bastard has received the text message again.

[40] My friend thought a lot last night, and I also thought about it. Only you are the coolest. In my dream, I searched for you for thousands of Baidu. Looking back, you were really thrown in the depths of someone else's donkey shed and tied up, cruel! Cruel! Calm down after reading the information!

Are you free tomorrow afternoon? I want to find you. Can you pick me up at the station? However, I'm afraid it's hard for people to recognize it. You let your head explode, with a stick in your right hand and a porcelain bowl in your left. The joint signal is: Come on!

[42] I dreamed of you. You made a dress out of white clouds, borrowed the wings of a bird, put the broom behind your ass, and then the sword flew to me and told me affectionately: Do you know? That's what birdman looks like.

[43] I thought there was something better, but I found it again and again. The best is around, just like you. I didn't think so at first, but as time went on, I realized that you were the best … bully!

[44] I am determined to do three major things for the people of the whole country: 1 build an elevator for Mount Everest, 2 tiles of the Great Wall, and 3 inverted airplanes; Do three little things: 1 put gloves on flies, 2 put a mask on mosquitoes, and 3 feed you some pig feed.

[45] Arrived in xishuangbanna tourism, Yunnan, and was besieged by a group of wild boars. The tourists took out food and money, and the wild boar was unmoved. You take out your unique ID card, and the pigs kneel down and cry: Boss, we can find you!

[46] You are a 65,438+00 playboy. You often play with 9. 8 Maybe you don't have hundreds of millions of money at home. You will abandon 7 for many years and look for prey all day. 5 needs to ask more questions, but you are still half-hearted. You are definitely not a good person.

[47] You are very creative, living is your courage, ugliness is not your intention, and without you, who can set off the beauty of the world!

[48] After seeing the Three Kingdoms, the tiger went to catch wild boar. He saw that there were no pigs in the pigsty, so he touched his beard and said, Empty city plan! I turned around and saw a dead pig on the animal trap. I was shocked: danger! Suddenly seeing you again, I was overjoyed: yo-ho, there is a honey trap!

[49] The toad pursued the swan, and the swan said disdainfully, if I were like this, I would have died long ago! Toad refused: Is the pig still alive? Hearing this, the pig felt wronged: I provoked whoever I recruited, I was just reading the text message!

[50] There is a yearning, a love, a beauty, an agreement, and a greeting, hello, piggy!

[5 1] I don't want to be alone, I also want to have it. When I walk in the street, I will have a look. Handsome men and beautiful women hold hands, but I hold hands with my left hand. Now I just want to go out with you, but I'm afraid my friend will say, don't always walk the dog.

[52] In a military exercise, a shell deviated far away. I was sent to check and found that the shell exploded in the farmland. You stood there in rags, with dark eyes and tearful eyes. You said to me: Is it worth stealing a cabbage with a shell?

[53] I miss the days we walked together. Spring is beautiful, birds are singing and flowers are fragrant. Everyone in the village praises you for your beauty and cuteness. The villagers also praised me for being smart and capable, and I came out to release pigs at such a young age.

[54] When you are lonely, watermelon may be your best vent. You can cut, chop, chop, and shout loudly: I kill melons, I kill melons, I kill melons!