Quanzhou marriage custom

Marriage custom in Quanzhou, southern Fujian

One side of the soil and water support one side. Speaking of marriage in Quanzhou, South Fujian, there are not only many ceremonies, but also every custom is full of local color. When men and women are in love, no matter whether the object is free love or matchmaking, if they want to get married, they must go through the "engagement" procedure without exception. The so-called "betrothal" means that the man chooses an auspicious day by his elders or clan elders and brings gifts such as gold and silver jewelry, wedding (engagement) gold, wedding candy and cigarettes to the woman's house to "betrothal", or engagement, and announces that the marriage is fixed. Minnan people attach great importance to this, because it is a necessary procedure before marriage, and it is regarded as a de facto marriage without legal procedures, which is largely equivalent to marriage. After the engagement, young women regard each other as their future lifelong partners, so they don't have to shy away from quietly opening roses and dare not show their humanity to outsiders. What's more, it is natural for a man to live in his own home or in his own home, and there is no need to worry about other people's gossip and gossip.

Engagement gold and silver jewelry should have been ready long ago, usually from head to toe. What gold earrings, necklaces, rings, bracelets, anklets and jewels shine. The number varies according to the economic situation of different families, and most people do what they can. Gift money (engagement) is essential. According to the previous statement, this dowry is the "money" given by the man's family to the woman's family (the money for raising a girl). The woman makes an offer first, and the man makes a counter-offer according to his own economic situation, and then the matchmaker talks about it. In the early years, when life was difficult, the woman's parents would leave part of the engagement money to supplement the family. It seems too shabby to do so now. Usually, the bride price is used as a dowry, so we must add more to avoid being stingy, and the girl will look better when she gets married. According to the current general situation, this gift is generally between 5000 yuan and 10000 yuan. At least enough to buy a motorcycle or a color TV, refrigerator, washing machine and the like as a dowry, at most without capping. In the 1970s and 1980s, there were few gifts (engagements), and some places used glass frames with the largest denomination to make people see and show off. It's different now. No one wants to go to so much trouble or "risk their wealth". Just bring a current passbook. In addition, wedding candy is also essential for engagement. It's for the woman to distribute to relatives and friends, telling them that her daughter is married and will be married soon. The amount of wedding candy depends on the needs of the woman's family. Generally, three or two hundred Jin is enough.

After preparing these things, the man can choose an auspicious day to invite the matchmaker to the woman's house for engagement. When the man arrives at the woman's house, after the host and guest sit down, the girl brings tea to entertain the man's family, and then the matchmaker introduces the guests of the man's house and the woman's parents. It should be said that the matchmaker plays the role of presiding over the whole engagement process, and his status is unknown. Some men and women who are free to fall in love and get married will also quickly pull one as a matchmaker, which feels natural. Of course, the matchmaker is not essential. Without the matchmaker, both men and women will not care informally, but feel more cordial.

After the introduction, the girl came to get the teacup back. The climax of the ceremony was to wear an engagement ring, and the girl was accompanied by the older women in the family. In the hall of ancestor worship, she sat on a stool, with her face facing outward and her feet resting on a small stool. The matchmaker came forward and said a few auspicious words, such as: "It hurts to sit up straight" and "It's better after sitting sideways". Then the young man took the girl's hand and carefully put an engagement ring on the Iraqi in his heart. From then on, he was destined to grow old together. Other bride price can be given to the woman's home. At the same time, the matchmaker has to tell the girl's parents that the man has decided to marry the girl on a certain day in the future, and he will give the woman a "sedan chair front plate" seven, five and three days before marriage, and decide what items and how much he needs at this time.

The gifts received by the woman's family should be dedicated to her ancestors. Tell your ancestors that your son and daughter have completed the etiquette of getting engaged to XXX. Completed the ceremony. Some female families also hold banquets for male guests, accompanied by their uncles and elders. During the dinner, they talked and laughed, which harmonized the atmosphere and enhanced understanding. After that, the engagement ceremony was over.

Before the wedding, the "sedan chair front plate" is commonly called "flower bag", except pork, chicken and sheep, which is "flower bag". Generally, each "flower bag" weighs about one catty. Like a disc with a diameter of six inches, more than one inch high, it is made of refined white flour and filled with white sugar, peanuts, fat meat and wax gourd sugar. Put a round double happiness word in the middle of the dough. Depending on the woman's needs, the number of flower bags is generally 100, or as many as 200, which are divided into several containers (a container in rural areas) to hold several loads, and a bright red double happiness word should be attached to each plate. In addition, a "gift bear" should be prepared and sent to the woman's house together with the "sedan chair front plate". The "gift bear" is full of pig's trotters, pork, noodles, eggs, chicken, wine and so on. Designed to honor the kindness of the woman's parents.

With the progress and development of society, the custom of "engagement" in Quanzhou marriage in southern Fujian has gradually become simple and faded. For example, except in remote rural areas, there are almost no more "engagement" ceremonies, but the etiquette is no longer so complicated.