Once I cheat, I become a male puppet.

Text/Ni Xia

Some mistakes, really can't be made. Once wrong, it's hard to go back.

I never thought I would cheat before. Really, I am a good woman, and my parents have always taught me to be polite and ashamed. I have always looked down on the roles of lover and mistress. Who knew I would be one of them? This is probably impermanence.

My husband is thirty-four. I am two years younger than him, but I look very tender. Many people think I'm only twenty-four, which makes me very happy. Women want to look young. It is because I am young and good-looking, my boss took a fancy to me and lured me to cheat. He also became the third man in my marriage.

Last year, I changed my boss, a tall and thin man in his early forties, who looked very determined and serious. But it is rumored that he is a playboy and prefers to find young women. I didn't think so at the time. I forgot after listening to it. I had no idea that my later life would be so entangled because of him.

At the end of last year, the boss's secretary went on maternity leave. I don't know who arranged it. I was transferred to be his temporary secretary for three months. Although I am not very happy about this transfer, I am a dedicated person. Now that I have arranged it, I will try my best to do it well. The boss is very satisfied with my work performance.

At first, my contact with my boss was limited to work. Later, slowly, he would find an excuse to ask me out after work, and I didn't like to brush his face. Most of the time, I agree. Later, I went to a bar with him. After a few drinks, I feel a little dizzy. My boss offered to take me back, but instead of taking me home, he took me to the hotel.

Maybe because of alcohol, I cheated in the confusion. Afterwards, I was ashamed and felt sorry for my husband. But the boss tasted the sweetness and kept pestering me. Half temptation and half threat, I finally became his lover. At first I despised my behavior, but gradually I couldn't live without him.

My boss is very capable. Being with him not only gave me a lot of material enjoyment, but also made me realize the true taste of being a woman. Before, my husband was the only man in my life, and he was also a traditional person. Our husband and wife life is always dull, without any passion. I am not a woman with a strong desire, and I have never felt anything wrong with it. But after being with my boss, I realized that love can make people so crazy. At that time, I even felt that I could not live without him.

But when I suddenly fell ill last year, I realized that neutrality is not the most important thing in life. My husband is the one who really loves me and cares about me. This is acute gastric bleeding. I fainted after being taken to the hospital, which scared my husband. Afterwards, I saw my husband's eyes were red. Later in the hospital, my husband always accompanied me and took good care of me. Everyone in the same ward envied me for marrying a good husband.

I began to regret my infidelity and felt ashamed to face my husband. I am determined to break up with my boss. I was thinking about my relationship with my boss, that is, my lover. Presumably, he has no sincerity to me and should agree to break up. But who knows, as soon as he heard that I wanted to go back to my parents' house, he wouldn't, saying that if I broke up with him, he would send photos of us together to my husband. I have no choice but to hate myself for not being able to control myself before, and now I can only continue to be his sex puppet. I just hope he will get tired of me and let me go early.