Shinohara in despair has 30 chapters, 3 1.

Feeling the temperature coming from her chest, Sue lowered her eyes awkwardly, shook her calf a few times and whispered, "Let me down first."

Jingyan naturally ignored her, held her upstairs, bowed her head and sniffed between her necks, and raised a faint smile on her mouth: "Huh? Did you take a shower? " That deep voice, in this ambiguous midnight, is especially confusing.

Sue's heart itches and her skin fades. She buried herself in his arms and answered vaguely, letting him carry himself to the second floor. But the next second, she couldn't help looking up from his deep chin until his eyes were as bright, mysterious and radiant as obsidian.

She couldn't help swallowing, her face was purple and her heart was beating fast.

Jing Yan put her on the bed, held out her hand and touched her head with a smile: "Well, let's go to sleep when we've seen enough. Don't just teach Xiao Yao to go to bed early and get up early, he has become a child. "

Sue nodded slowly, but he held his hand and refused to let go. Then pull him down with a little force, tilt his head and tease him with a gentle smile: "What can I do? I just can't get enough of it. Why don't you let me have a good look? "

Jingyan laughed in bursts, but she didn't stop her childish behavior and let her see it generously.

She knelt behind him, hugged him with slender hands, slowly slid on his temples, gently pressed and kneaded, with moderate strength, then the eyebrows, the head side, and then the neck, shoulders and waist. Skillful and comfortable techniques seem to push away all troubles.

"here?" Hearing his sigh, she increased her strength slightly. Looking down from her point of view, his eyes are slightly closed, and his face is obviously pleasing to the eye, but it is marked with a sharp sense of distance. It is rare for her to see fatigue from his look.

JingYan lazily "well", very comfortable.

The movement in her hand didn't stop. She asked him, "Are you tired? You didn't sleep last night either. Why don't I put hot water on you? You can take a bath and go to bed later. "

Jingyan hasn't spoken for a long time. Her problem is new to him. It seems that no one has ever paid attention to whether he is tired. He only feels that it is a matter of course that he stands at the top of the list, and life and death dominate everything. He can do anything, so he is not tired or tired. His body leaned back slightly, slowly leaning against her arms, and he could smell the elegant shower gel at the tip of his nose. Perhaps it is because of this feeling that he naturally wants to be close to her because others have no comfort.

Su Xiaomu paused, then smiled and hugged him from behind. The heartbeats of two people overlap and alternate. At this moment, she doesn't need to do anything. It is enough to have such a partner.

Sue's sleep quality is surprisingly good tonight, and she naturally wakes up when she sleeps. After waking up, she rang the alarm clock at the head of the bed and gave a heavy "ah". Unexpectedly, it's already half past nine, and Xiaoyao will be late for school! This time, she almost jumped up. It happened that Jingyan pushed the door and came in. Rarely has she looked so confused. Her smile spread out a little bit, and she said with a smile, "Don't worry, I just sent Xiaoyao to school."

Xiao Su was relieved and got up and said to him, "Then I'll make breakfast."

Jing Yan held her down and shook her head. She met his sight in disbelief before she heard him say, "Go out for dinner. I have no other schedule today. I can accompany you around. "

Su was stunned for a long time, and even the words were incomplete: "What did you say?"

"Don't want to go out with me? Forget it, I'd better go back to the company. " Jingyan's tone is very helpless and sorry. He turned around and hid the smile on his lips.

Su Xiaomu quickly grabbed him: "Hey, you have to keep your word, wait for me for five minutes, it will be ready soon!" " "Then he rushed into the bathroom barefoot and washed up.

Jing Yan listened to the sound of running water inside, thinking about her excitement just now, and just accompanying her out so happily, which made him feel good inexplicably.

Their breakfast was settled in an old shop not far from the apartment. Wonton, steamed stuffed bun, bean curd, fried dough sticks, very simple and simple style.

Sue took a look at Jingyan quietly every time she took a bite of tofu. His cultivation is very good. Even though everything around him was noisy, he tasted it slowly and quietly, as if it were not tofu brain, but a top-notch delicacy.

She asked hesitantly, "I remember you didn't like this before?"

Her father was still there, and she was on duty at night. In the morning, he came to visit the patient, and then they went to have breakfast together. It's also a traditional breakfast, but he frankly doesn't like it. In the end, she persisted all day on her own. Now when he is at home, she cooks western-style breakfast, so she was surprised when he just offered to eat this only thing she likes.

But Jing Yan just gave her a faint look: "Well, just because you didn't like it before doesn't mean you don't like it now." Then I ate a spoonful slowly.

Sue's heart couldn't help jumping. She didn't know if she was delusional. What does she think he means? However, she knew that he didn't like talking about food, so she didn't say anything more. In the surrounding lively environment, the two quietly enjoyed this breakfast for only two people.

Have enough to eat and drink.

Jing Yan looked up at the time of her watch and asked her, "Where do you want to go later? What do you want to buy? "

Sue nodded first, then shook her head. She thought it over. There were a lot of arrangements at first. She wanted to climb the mountain with him to watch the sunrise, go shopping for dinner, watch movies and watch the night scene, just like a couple, but with this opportunity, she will find that as long as she is with him, it doesn't matter where she goes or what she does, and there is no need to set a pattern, which will change her taste.

Jingyan stretched her eyebrows and said with a smile, "It's just that you have no idea. I have a place to take you. "

Sue didn't ask him where he was taking himself. If there is, he will say, "You will know when you go." Forget it. It's good to be mysterious once in a while.

It is also in line with her good mood. The weather in the imperial capital is particularly good today. Autumn sunshine falls on the skin without burning. The car left the congested driveway and came to Jingyan's villa in Chaoyang District. He parked the car at the door but didn't go in, habitually looking for cigarettes, only to remember that since he was with her, he had never put a cigarette beside him, and his fist began to tighten, controlling his emotions.

Sue quietly looked at him as silent as a statue and guessed where it was.

It was a long time before I heard him mutter, "We lived here from my birth to my mother's death, and she was stuck here all her life."

The air seems to be a little sticky by his emotions, which makes people feel uncomfortable.

"Jingyan ..." Sue held his hand tightly, as if it could give him strength.

In fact, because of physical reasons, her hands were not warm, but Jing Yan felt a strange warmth. He quickly softened his tight chin and said softly, "I'm fine, don't worry." Let's get off and I'll show you around, but it's been deserted for a long time. "

They got out of the car, opened the iron gate with retro carvings, and walked all the way along the garden path to the back room, as if they had entered just visiting. Jingyan began to recall the bits and pieces of her life here. Most of his memories are with his mother, and his father's appearance is very vague. If I hadn't met him yesterday, maybe he wouldn't even remember the man's face.

The garden of the villa is regularly arranged by the gardener, so it is still vibrant and not decadent, but it is not popular and feels a bit bleak. Seeing the European-style bench in the garden, Jingyan's lip corner could not help but lift a radian, pulling her to sit down together and saying, "Mom, she likes sitting here in the sun and planting flowers. Look, there is a rose garden in the back, all planted by her. "

Sue looked at his face and saw that his expression was good. He turned his head to look back. He held his hand and said slowly, "Must be beautiful? Can you show it to me? "

Jingyan patted the back of her hand: "No, there is a lot of pollen there. You'll be allergic. You can see the panorama when you go upstairs later. "

They walked into the living room in tandem, with European decoration style. Because no one has lived in it for a long time, the furniture is covered with windbreakers and painted white, but you can still vaguely see the original exquisite appearance. The dust in the house made Sue involuntarily cough twice, covering her nose. Jing Yan frowned and took her directly to the second floor, his mother's bedroom.

He stood in front of the retro big bed, bent as if he were turning something over. Sue was curious: "What are you looking for? Do you want me to help you? "

"There is a lot of dust here. Don't come here. Just wait for me. " Jing Yan shook her head, finally found a small key from the bedside table, then opened a slightly older cosmetic box and took out a wooden box from the stacked box. He couldn't help laughing: "It's really here."

He turned his back on Sue, so she didn't know what he found. She was about to explore it. He turned around and said very directly, "Come on, give me your hand."

Sue just froze for a few seconds, and the watch on her wrist was put on her hand. The cold touch of the dial made her tremble and brought her back to her senses.

I heard Jing Yan talk about the origin of the watch lightly: "Although this watch is a bit old in style, it is a pair with me. This is my mother's heart. She said at the time that this watch should be left to her daughter-in-law. I don't think it is necessary to bother to buy it now that you are ready. What do you think? "

The watch left by her mother-in-law to her daughter-in-law is naturally unparalleled, which is another way to express her affirmation of Sue.

Sue couldn't help wondering. She lowered her head so that she wouldn't see her expression. She asked in a slightly nasal voice, "Did you ... see what I wrote?"

"hmm." Jingyan carefully helped her put on her watch and said, "It's my fault this time, which made you sad." He accidentally found stationery full of plans in the garbage basket of the living room, and it was kneaded into a ball, as if he could see her tight heart. He really felt that he had hurt her again, and even if he felt wronged according to her personality, he would only endure it, which made people feel distressed and helpless.

"I was wrong, too." Sue: Yeah, just shook her head.

No wonder he left his job, said those words and brought himself here to give her his mother's treasure. In fact, he wants to love her, doesn't he? But there are contradictions between them, and the responsibility lies not only with him but also with her. She doesn't have enough trust in his feelings and confidence in herself. Otherwise, how could she just be A Qin Zhen, who is not even an ex-girlfriend?

As for the watch delivery, it is part of her little plan.

Both men and women, as long as they really like each other, will involuntarily have a desire to reject, especially women, there will be a feeling of giving things to men to wear around and declaring ownership to other women.

Sue likes watches very much. She thinks the man wearing a watch is very attractive. Conceptual replacement holds that such a man is punctual and rigorous, especially when he looks down at the time. Jingyan is just such a person. However, she also knows that she has more than she can chew. The watch he often wears may not be affordable even if she spends all her savings over the years.

And what I have is just a pair with him.

The priest's cross and the knight's sword are symbols of courage and dignity.

This is also his mother's favorite thing. She couldn't help rubbing it with her fingertips. How can the man's money, which should have been put in his father's hand, be in his father's hand, while the woman's money, although old, is brand-new, and has not been worn for a few days? It is estimated that the original owners of the two watches missed each other for some reason.

Although she doesn't know his parents completely, she can guess everything about them.

Looking up slightly, I saw his eyes rested on the delicate dial, his lips were silent and his face was tight. I don't know if she remembered any unpleasant past events, and she was also very uncomfortable. Suddenly I remembered the slogan of this brand-no one can own Patek Philippe, only reserved for the next generation.

She said, "Well, we can pass this watch to Mr. and Mrs. Xiaoyao in the future."

Jing Yan's stiff face was amused by her. Knowing that she wanted to change this boring topic, she went on to say, "The painter's imagination is really rich. How many years has he been married? " And I'm afraid he won't like this half-century antique. "

Xiao Su curled his lips and said, "This watch is just like wine. The older you get, the better. How can I not like it? "

"We'll see." He squeezed her hand, hugged her and asked, "Do you want to ... go to my room?"

"Is that okay?" Sue blurted out, her eyes lit up in an instant, and even her mood jumped. She wants to know everything about him. She wants to know.

Jing Yan immediately said, "Why not? Come, just opposite. "

Compared with the gentle style of his mother's room, his room is more masculine, but there are many photos hanging on the wall, mostly of him and his mother, or of his classmates at school, but none of them are his father's.

May be noticed Sue's eyes, Jing Yan looked at the familiar photo, and then slowly explained, "I'm not familiar with my dad. He is often away from home, and my mother is always with me. I didn't understand when I was a child. When I grow up, I know that his heart is elsewhere. "

"Don't say anything if you feel uncomfortable?" Painful memories are like scraping the heart, and she can understand his feelings.

"I never look back. The past is the past, it can't be changed, and I don't want to mention it again. After all, it's not a good memory. I just want to tell you that my personality has been difficult to get close to others since I was a child. Zhen Zhen is an exception to me. She is very kind to me and I like her. " He obviously felt her body become stiff, but firmly held her hand and continued: "She and I both learned about the relationship between her mother and my father later, then she gave up on me first, and now you are by my side. You just need to remember this. "

"I can't leave her alone, so I hope you can give me enough time and trust to deal with this matter and don't think about it. It is not good for the body, and it is even worse for us. " He stood upright, his gray wool vest made him look handsome and tall, and he held her hand strongly and warmly.

This man has always been aloof, and she knows his character. No matter what he did, even if he was criticized, he never explained it to anyone, but now he is willing to take the trouble to untie her heart patiently and tell her with actions that she is not the only one working hard between them.

She was so moved that her nose was slightly sour that she wanted to cry and giggle. Afraid of being laughed at by him, she had to bury her face in his arms and hug him tightly, and said softly, "Then we agreed that you should not keep me waiting too long."

3 1 mood

Delicate Bulgarian roses are in full bloom in the garden.

Sue slowly let go of Jingyan, lay on her side, looked out of the window, and easily saw the flowers.

In the afternoon sun, it blooms warmly, just like the great feeling that their owners once had. She smiled faintly: "Jing Yan,no."

If you take me to see my mother today. "

Hearing her calling her mother so kindly, Jingyan's mouth rose slightly: "The road over there is a bit far, and

And you have to walk a flight of stone steps. You will be very tired. "Such thoughtful words made everyone feel warm and touching.

"How can my mother-in-law be tired when she goes to see your mother?" Sue raised her eyes and saw his lips.

She said first, "Go today. Don't tell me next time. You are always so busy, and you don't know when next time.

. "

Jingyan smiled meaningfully, with deep ridicule in her eyes: "Oh? Then should I understand that you are hugging?

Blame me me for not spending enough time with you? "He suddenly close to her ear, to her delicate auricle exhale, ambiguous breath in

Unconsciously, she dodged, a lock of curly hair hung down, and he stood up solemnly.

As she lifted her hair, she looked at her red cheeks and said with a smile, "How can you be so accommodating when the children are so old?"

Shy? "

Knowing that he was teasing her on purpose-he seems happy to do so recently, Sue snorted, not to be outdone, and dialed

Let go of his hand and symbolically pinch his waist, becoming angry from embarrassment: "Do you dislike my age?"

Jingyan even laughed at her eyes, so she grabbed her hand on her waist and took her into her arms, as if to appease her feelings.

Say deeply, "no, no, it's just right for me."

Not too late or too early, as long as it's just right, as long as it's just right.

Sue suddenly quieted down, didn't speak again, didn't look at him again, put her face on his chest, and she only now.

I want to do one thing, that is, let this moment stay longer, preferably forever.

Walking from the town to the garden, Sue walked down the steps, glanced at the rose garden and whispered:

"Why don't we bring roses? Mom, she should be very happy to see the roses she planted. " Although I have a mother

As a relative, seeing her son is better than everything, such as her Xiaoyao.

Jing Yan Zheng, provoked by her words, mother always likes to pick some in the living room before flowering.

In the room, she said that only in this way can she feel alive at home, but although the fragrance of flowers can precipitate people's feelings, it can't be repaired.

Fill the emptiness and loneliness. It is not clear whether mother likes roses or kills time with roses.

It is rare for her to be so thoughtful. He nodded, ups and downs from here to calm down, and simply said

"Then wait for me here."

Sue watched him walk into the arch made of vines, and he was familiar with picking and cutting in a corner.

Yes, I cut some white roses, and the warm sunshine hit him, and his face deepened in the backlight, and his eyes were full of tenderness.

Carefully remove the thorn from the rose, wrap it, and then walk slowly towards her. So familiar, and still wearing.

Dressed in the simplest clothes, she couldn't take her eyes away until he took her hand and whispered, "Let's go.

"

The cemetery is in another district, far away. They went very late, and when they went down the mountain, it was already.

It's night.

Melting streamers spread out in the cold tomb area, drawing a little warmth in the bleak place.

Next to the ten thousand stone steps like a cloud, Jingyan suddenly bent down and motioned for Sue to lie on his back and whispered

Say, "Come on up, I'll carry you down the mountain."

Sue was shocked and pulled him up at once. He said with a hot face, "Come on, it's embarrassing. I will go by myself. "

Do it. I don't lack arms and legs, and I'm not a child anymore. "

"What's embarrassing? There is nothing wrong with the couple doing anything out of line again. Besides, I'm just carrying you back, afraid.

What? Ok, stop dawdling. I'll carry you to the parking lot, or Xiaoyao will pout again when your feet are swollen.

Happy for several days. "In fact, he is not happy, he doesn't know her blood gas running is not very good, once go too much.

On the road, especially on the mountain road, her legs will be swollen and painful the next day, just like when she visited her parents last time.

Su Xiaomu raised his head and narrowed his eyes. His smiling side face became gentler in the oblique light. How can he be so gentle?

Refuse, and why refuse? Can only sink.

Instead of being melodramatic, she obediently lay on his generous back, put her arms around him and listened to him through a wool vest and shirt.

Regular heartbeat, level by level, step by step, full of warmth.

Suddenly I remembered the touching paragraph I saw on the Internet the other day, so I asked him cheerfully: "Jing Yan, do you think I am heavy?"

Not heavy? "

"heavy? Don't people who weigh less than 90 pounds feel lighter? " Jingyan subconsciously stopped to answer, her voice was very

Low, his hand shook again, and then he continued to go down.

Sure enough, how could he say such a romantic thing as "the whole world is on my back"? Sue is small.

Disappointed, I whispered, "I really don't understand amorous feelings."

But after thinking about it, she whipped herself quickly. He is not a romantic, and usually only looks at money.

According to news magazines, personality is also cold, but this is not the reason why she loves him. It is clear and cold. nobody

Will be perfect, and I have many shortcomings, how can I ask him so much? He took her to heart and treated her well.

Isn't this a hundred times better than those empty love words?

They are so close, how can he not hear her complaints, but he doesn't know how to guess her smallness.

A woman's mind just says slowly according to her own understanding, "What's the matter? Say that you are not happy? Women are not all.

Like slim? But I think you should eat more and keep your weight. Too light is not good. I will ... feel bad. "

He paused when he said the last two words, as if he was hesitating himself. He is not the kind of person who would say such sensational words. But there are some words and things.

Naturally, I said and did it. I didn't listen to reason at all. I just follow my heart.

And it is even more impossible for him to know that the more people who don't understand amorous feelings, the more they will do romantic things and say romantic words to impress people.

Because it's valuable.

He said he felt sorry for himself ... Sue felt that her tears were low and her nose was sour today, so she hugged him.

Hurry up.

They returned to the city from the cemetery and went to school to pick up Xiaoyao first. This is the first time they both picked him up at the same time. small

Yao was so excited to see their little appearance when they appeared together, pulling his father at one moment and his mother at the other.

Finally, simply don't give up, give a hand and have a happy threesome.

Aunt Nanny won't be back until tomorrow, so it's still chef Xiao Su Mu today. Before going to the supermarket to buy food, she followed Jing Yan and said:

"Why don't you take Xiaoyan home first? There are many people in the supermarket. I can go by myself. "

Jingyan pursed her lips: "You can go together if you want." He looked down at his son. "Isn't it?"

Xiaoyao nodded and agreed with his father: "Well, of course we are going. By the way, let mom not buy so many green peppers and carrots. "

Bu。 "

Sue laughed and twisted her son's nose and said, "What's your idea!" " I won't refuse again.

Because there are many people in the supermarket before and after meals.

Sue had to remind herself in her mind that Jingyan didn't like crowded places. She wants to do it quickly, but she gets used to it every time.

Everything is done seriously, and things linger unconsciously with the passage of time. After choosing the ingredients for dinner, she lifted it.

Boss, seeing the side in front of the shelf, he and his son are waiting for themselves quietly and patiently, surrounded by noise and excitement.

But inside, she is unusually calm.

Such a dull day feels more comfortable than the luxurious so-called honeymoon.

The next day, Jingyan went to the hotel to meet Qin Gui.

Just entering the suite, Wang Hao, who was waiting there, seemed a little strange. He raised his eyebrows and asked, "What's the matter?"

Wang Hao replied: "Teacher Qin and her mother had some disagreements and quarreled." He glanced at the house.

The direction of the room, the half-open door, there was a fierce noise inside, and scraps of paper floated on the ground. A closer look reveals that it is a shredder.

Tickets.

And Qin Gui's voice was high and sharp: "Mom, how many times have I said, I won't go to the United States until I return to the United States!" Will you listen?

You got it? What if I go back? Is it embarrassing? "

Fang Min sighed, "What does it matter if you don't live in the same state? Besides, you stay alone.

I don't trust you here. "

"How can I be alone? You don't need to worry. Isn't there Jing Yan's brother and mother? He will take care of me. "

Seeing that she is still stubborn, Fang Min's tone is hard: "Don't play dumb with me, you know Ayan is married."

Married! Don't disturb others. How old are you? Don't be willful with me! "

Qin Zhen didn't speak again.

The room was quiet for a long time.

Then, I heard Qin Gui's thin voice stubbornly arguing: "Mom, I don't want to go." She raised her eyebrows and saw Li.

The figure at the door, looking for a lifeline, rushed over and took Jingyan's sleeve with joy and said, "Brother, tell mom.

I don't want to go back. I want to stay in Beijing. I grew up here. Why can't I come back and live? "

Jingyan bowed her head and looked at her carefully, her delicate cheeks flushed abnormally, and her speech seemed to be in an orderly way, but it was not.

It makes people feel wrong. He suddenly said, "I made an appointment with Dr. Lu. I'll see him first." Others.

We'll see. "

When Qin Gui heard that he was going to see a doctor, he immediately opened his mouth to refute, but he was glared at by his mother and went to Jingyan unconsciously.

On the edge, Jing Yan pulled away from her without showing any trace, touched her head to calm her down, and then took out her mobile phone and dialed a number.

Code, prepare the car to see Lu gradually.

When you get to the graduate school, everything should be handed over to professionals. Qin Zhen resisted at first, and Dr. Lu suggested hypnosis first.

Relax the nerves, then carry out treatment and sign a confidentiality agreement. Qin Zhen reluctantly entered the treatment room.

Her memory goes back many years. Because of her mother's objection, she fled abroad and was taken away as a stranger.

She was pestered by a few rascally hooligans with the intention of being rude to her, and she couldn't get rid of it, thinking that she was finished.

At that time, Cheng Yu and his two American friends happened to pass by and generously saved her.

Later, she failed to recover from that time. It happened that Cheng Yu went to the same university as her. He cared about her and took care of her.

She gradually forgot about it, became fond of him, and slowly let go of her hazy feelings for Jingyan. They drive.

When she first started dating, Cheng Yu spoiled her and let her do whatever she wanted around him. She was really happy in those days.

Then they got married.

Memory began to collapse and jumped to a few years later.

Her child was gone, Cheng Yu married another woman, and she called him crazily. He said he hoped they would.

Later, I saw less, which was deja vu, as if she had said this to someone before.

That man is Jing Yan, who has protected her since childhood.

Mother kept it from her, but even such a quiet person who was guarding herself was leaving her. How does she feel?

There is nothing left, and there is nothing to lose.

She screamed.

The dream is very clear, like a previous life.