What should I do if my parents abuse me?

Today’s Introduction

Recently, Today’s Australia Backstage received news from readers: A single mother who calls herself Xiaoyi (pseudonym) wants to expose a Chinese father in Sydney!

In her self-report, Xiaoyi mentioned that her former husband Xiao Ping (pseudonym) was not only "very lazy and arrogant, but also abused her domestically!"

In her friend Xiao R In his eyes, "The married life of this young couple is not happy. The man is very talkative and bragging."

(Photo courtesy of the whistleblower)

Currently, Xiaoyi rents a house alone in Brisbane with her child. She only wants to take her child back to China to get vaccinated.

(Picture provided by the whistleblower)

“I hope the Xiaoping family can let us go,

let our mother and son return to China,

I I am heartbroken for them.”

The following is the self-report of the whistleblower Xiao Yi (pseudonym):

I am Xiao Yi, Xiao Ping’s former wife. I registered my marriage with Xiao Ping in Australia on May 6, 2016, and decided to divorce on June 28, 2017, and we have been officially separated ever since. At this point, I want to truthfully state the reasons for our separation and divorce.

Xiao Ping is a well-dressed beast who is lazy, has no regard for friendship, speaks arrogantly, does not respect human rights, and engages in domestic violence. It's my fault that I graduated from college and was still relatively young, so I fell in love with his sweet promises, which led to the current divorce situation.

"When we were in love, he coaxed me with sweet words."

When we were in love, he told me that he had a stable job and could be promoted by his boss in the near future. In addition, he raved that unless he resigned from this job, he would never lose his job. He told me that his parents were both high-ranking officials, and they were both reasonable and reasonable people in terms of culture. They would definitely treat me as if they were their own children. I believed his promise and went back to China to meet his parents at the end of 2015 and the beginning of 2016.

(Picture provided by the whistleblower)

Maybe it was because we met for the first time, but I felt okay. So he came to my house with his parents to propose marriage. After the two parents met, they also had good words to say, so that my parents could rest assured that they would definitely allow me to live the happiest life, and I would also be able to enjoy a life that other families could not enjoy.

In addition, their family promised that if I like living in Brisbane, they will definitely buy a larger villa in Brisbane and give it to us as a wedding home. (Although they bought an apartment in Sydney 10 years ago, it has been rented out for a long time and has become an old house).

Therefore, even though my parents were reluctant to let me, their only daughter, cross the ocean and live overseas for a long time, they believed that Xiaoping and I were in love and the commitment given by his parents. I listened to his parents and agreed to our marriage.

(Picture provided by the whistleblower)

At the same time, his parents asked how much do we need as a bride price for our family? My parents’ answer was, as long as you can fulfill your promise, and as long as Xiao Ping and his family treat me well after the marriage, everything is for the good of the two of us, and we don’t need any money from the bride price! I don’t have to pay a penny to meet my parents. The Pan family kept saying it was great and thanked my parents again and again for raising me to be such a good person!

"After marriage, the nightmare really begins"

Who would have known that on April 1, 2016, Xiao Ping suddenly and inexplicably lost his job without giving me a single explanation? and reasons. I didn't blame him for his sudden unemployment. I just thought that as long as the two of us share the joys and sorrows, life will be good.

After getting married, I stopped studying due to severe physical discomfort during my pregnancy. But my concept was that even though he was unemployed, I could find something to do, so I started a purchasing agent business. From the beginning when I was not familiar with the product, to the customers who gradually accumulated over time, I maintained it all by myself.

Therefore, the purchasing business is still okay, and I use all the income I earn to subsidize household expenses.

Including prenatal care, surgery, hospitalization, and buying all baby supplies for the child, I paid for it all by myself! The most annoying thing is that during my pregnancy, Xiao Ping not only didn't do any housework, but when I was cleaning, he even said "You are poor!" Let me ask, how hurtful are these words?

(Picture provided by the whistleblower)

In addition, when I was 7-8 months pregnant, he always let me sleep on a low mattress. The winter in Sydney is very cold. My belly got bigger in the later stages of my pregnancy, and I couldn’t bend down when sleeping on a mattress, which made my whole body sore while sleeping. After my repeated urging, it took more than eight months for him to buy a bed frame, and it was a simple bed frame.

On November 1, 2016, Xiaoping found a temporary job with a monthly salary of 2,668 Australian dollars. At this time, I was already full-term and facing labor at any time, but I still insisted on doing the purchasing business, buying goods and shipping them. Get up early and drive him to the train station, and drive to the train station to pick him up from get off work in the evening.

In late November 2016, Xiao Ping’s parents came to Australia, ostensibly to take care of their daughter-in-law who had given birth to a child. However, this was not the case. They never take the initiative to cook. In addition to buying and cooking for them on a hot day, I also repeatedly asked me, a full-term pregnant woman, to drive with them shopping and buy them gifts to take home. At that time, it was already sunny in Sydney. Extreme heat.

Although I couldn't bear it, out of filial piety, I still tried my best to meet their requests. Before the child was born, Xiao Ping's mother said to me many times: "Children born by caesarean section have a bad life and are unlucky!" I don't know what her intention was? !

"During the confinement period, he actually violently abused me!"

On December 17, 2016, our child was born. I thought it would bring laughter, but it was a million dollars. Unexpectedly, it was the beginning of my tragic life. After the child was born, he became a first-time mother and had many things at home. Xiao Ping complained to me many times that his parents were a drag on him in Australia. He told me and his friends many times that his parents could not help him. Not only did he I have to commute to and from get off work, take care of my children, and take care of the mood of the elderly. I am as tired as a dog every day. He also discussed with me many times that his parents should return to China as soon as possible.

Coincidentally, his brother Pan Changchun and his girlfriend were coming to Australia on December 30, so he came up with a way to let me use the room that I had rented for his brother and girlfriend to pay the rent. He canceled the trip because it was too expensive, and used this as a reason to persuade his parents to return to China, and took the initiative to help his parents change their air tickets to return home early. Before Xiao Ping's parents returned to China, I fulfilled my duties as a daughter-in-law and asked them to bring back various health and skin care products as well as the bird's nests that I planned to eat during my confinement period.

(Picture provided by the whistleblower)

On December 30, 2016, Xiao Ping’s brother and girlfriend arrived in Australia and moved into the house we rented at the time. This was a good thing, because his brother was naked from the waist up and underwear and walked in and out of my room every day. They completely ignored the fact that I was still in confinement and needed to breastfeed and take care of my child. What's serious is that his brother came back and forth to my room in the middle of the night wearing only a pair of underwear. I felt extremely angry, but good ethics told me that I had to discuss this matter with Xiao Ping. I hope he can give his brother a heads up and pay attention. Behavior, and hope that he will consider that the child needs to go to bed early at night and not to come in and out without causing unnecessary embarrassment.

However, what I didn’t expect was that Xiaoling said, “What’s the matter? Isn’t it normal?” He also said that I was too busy and didn’t understand human feelings. Because during the confinement period, I considered that my mood would affect my milk supply and my child's health, so I didn't care about it.

(Picture provided by the whistleblower)

But the matter is not over yet. Since Xiao Ping’s brother and girlfriend came to Australia to take wedding photos, I gave them a set of wedding photos, but Unexpectedly, Xiao Ping wanted to lend his brother the wedding suit that my parents had given him for taking pictures. I said, this is not good. We only get married once and take wedding photos only once. It’s important to borrow something meaningful like this. It's unlucky to go and you wore it after all.

Before I finished speaking, Xiao Ping fiercely accused me of being troublesome, saying that I was stingy, and so on. Apart from these, the most outrageous and serious thing happened.

His brother and his girlfriend go shopping and walk nearly 20,000 steps every day, but they go home every night and get off the train and call to ask for a small bottle to pick up. Xiao Ping, if you don’t complain in front of me about how tired you are every day, then go and pick them up. The key is to pick up his brother and girlfriend without caring about anything at home while complaining about how tired you are in front of me. He didn't help at all with the housework, didn't take care of the children, and just went to pick up his brother and girlfriend.

What’s abominable is that he also deceived me, even though he had brought his brother’s luggage home, he still lied to me and said he didn’t have it. I really couldn't bear it in the end, but I didn't expect that because of my anger, he would start domestic violence against me during the confinement period. Not only did he push me to the ground, but he also beat me repeatedly. Afterwards, he asked me to apologize to his brother. . I was forced to stay in a hotel with my child and confinement wife on a rainy night. He ignored us and just repeatedly emphasized that his brother was not wrong and wanted me to apologize. The next day, I had a mastitis attack and a fever of 39 degrees. My waist was severely damaged and I couldn't straighten up. What was hateful was that he never said sorry from the beginning to the end! ! !

“Forgiveness only brings more insults”

After that, he knew that my parents were coming over during the New Year in 2017, and he was afraid that I would be exposed to his domestic violence. He told my parents and begged me repeatedly to forgive him. The blame is that I was too stupid and naive, and as a mother, I also wanted to give my child a complete home, so I chose to forgive him, thinking that he would change and get better.

(Picture provided by the whistleblower)

On the first day of the Lunar New Year in 2017, my parents arrived in Sydney. This was their first time in Australia. Xiao Ping deliberately did not go because he was busy with work. Then, as a mother who had just given birth for about ten days, I had to leave the baby at a friend's house and go to the airport to pick up my parents alone.

After my parents came, they knew we were going to move and were very busy. Because we didn't have time to pack things, my dad got up at three in the middle of the night to help us pack them so that when the moving company came the next day, they could move them quickly to save time and money.

What I never expected was that after moving back to Xiaoping and his parents’ so-called mansion, the air conditioner was broken, the water pipes and hot water were broken, the windows were broken, the carpet was moldy, and the master bedroom The wardrobe was rotten and moldy, the toilet seat was broken, and many other things that needed repair. I would like to ask, can such a house be called a "luxury house"? It was over 40 degrees on a day when my parents helped us move. There was no air conditioner in the house, the windows were broken and could not be opened, and there was no wind at all. Even us adults could forget about it. This high temperature caused my children to Heat rash appears on the body.

(Picture provided by the whistleblower)

After moving the furniture, Xiaoping went to work and left the house without caring about anything. My father and I took care of things at home. We always asked Xiaoping and the property management to go to the house. Contact us and get the air conditioner repaired as soon as possible, otherwise it will be impossible for the children to live at home in such hot weather.

The funny thing is that Xiao Ping said that repairs can only be arranged when the air conditioners on the middle floors of the entire building are broken. Is this reason ridiculous? In desperation, my father and I went to the electronics store and bought the most expensive mobile air conditioners and fans, just to keep our children a little cooler.

(Picture provided by the whistleblower)

My parents came here for 16 days. They helped us settle the house, buy groceries and cook. Fresh meals were prepared for him when he got home from work. However, Xiao Ping was not grateful and only cared about himself. When he got home from work, he would just sit on the floor and play with his mobile phone. After dinner, he would lie on the bed wearing dirty clothes and play with his mobile phone. He ignored my parents' kindness to him. Ignore the children and never do any housework. Until my parents returned to China, he didn't even come downstairs to say goodbye, which made my parents extremely heartbroken and left Australia in tears.

(Picture provided by the whistleblower)

As the saying goes, "A country is easy to change, but a person's nature is hard to change." Xiao Ping's laziness, humiliation, and domestic violence continued until we separated.

(Pictures provided by the whistleblower)

From February to June 2017, he did not do any housework at all. His clothes were littered when he came home, and his shoes were placed randomly at the door. After urinating, There were urine stains all over the floor and he walked wantonly on the children's play mat. I repeatedly advised him to pay attention to hygiene, but he started to say: "If you don't clean up, why should I marry you?" Not only that, he also provoked and pushed her many times. He pointed at me and said: "You are given such a good house to live in, what are you dissatisfied with?" "Without me, who are you? What can you do in Australia?" Haha, let me ask, I don't know you Xiao Ping How did I live in the past 25 years? When I didn’t have you in my life, it was only better than now.

He uttered arrogant words, but he didn't want to think about the days after marriage, when I was pregnant, I supported my family, and I made money to support him. I am dedicated to this family and my children. But he said such horrible and insulting words to me, which forced me to the point where I couldn't bear it and vowed to leave him and divorce him.

"After filing for divorce, he refused to let us go, mother and son..."

In early June 2017, I filed for divorce from him. Clearly inform him that I have handed over matters related to our divorce to my attorney. But he didn't take it seriously. On June 11, his mother suddenly arrived in Australia. She didn't know whether it was due to illness. She had plaster on her face all the time, but she still had to forcefully hold the child.

I can understand the feeling of a grandmother who loves her grandson, but have you considered the health of your child? Holding the child close to his face caused the child's eczema to be severely infected, causing a large rash on his face. As a mother of a child, I do not ask you, as a grandmother, to buy gifts or anything for your grandson (from the time the child was born to the present, Xiao Ping’s parents have not spent a penny on the child!), but I hope that you will put the health of the child first. ! ! !

But Xiao Ping said, "It's okay, I'm just blushing."

When the child pooped, the mother and son just watched the child feel uncomfortable and waited for me to come home to change the child's diaper. Is this the attitude a grandma and a father should have towards their child?

(Picture provided by the whistleblower)

Despite this, I still fulfilled my filial duty as a daughter-in-law. I prepared meals for his mother every morning, noon and evening, and I also took care of the children. Get your hands dirty. What chills me is that when his mother and I talked about Xiao Ping’s domestic violence and beatings, his mother’s reply to me was: This is not a matter of principle!

I would like to ask, domestic violence and beating are not a matter of principle, so I would like to ask my mother-in-law, Professor Tao, have your knowledge and moral values ??been tarnished? It is precisely because I have such an unreasonable family that I am determined to get divorced. No matter what, I want to give my children a healthy and safe enough living environment.

On June 28, 2017, I officially moved out of the so-called "mansion" owned by Xiao Ping's family until now. In the past four months, Xiao Ping dragged the lawyer to draft the custody agreement and refused to sign it. He refused to sign the passport for the child. He refused to allow us, mother and son, to return to the country. ask. Let me ask, how can any father in the world be so cruel to his own child?

(Picture provided by the whistleblower)

Only at the end of September, Xiao Ping came to visit the child for the first time. He did not buy a piece of clothing or a toy for the child. He only verbally showed concern for the child by giving kisses and hugs. It is really not an exaggeration to say that Xiao Ping is a scumbag. I told him again and again that for the sake of the child and for the child to get better care, please sign the agreement as soon as possible. It is up to you to decide the content of the custody agreement. As long as it allows me to You can just return to your country with peace of mind and raise your children better.

(Picture provided by the whistleblower)

But he refused to sign for a long time and used various reasons to evade it, so as to tie me and my children to Australia. Dear friends, can you understand how difficult it is for a 25-year-old single mother to live alone with her children in a foreign country in Australia? I can't work because I have to take care of my children, so I have no income, so I rely on the subsidies my parents give me.

When a child is sick and has a fever, he is taken to the emergency room and has to queue for 4-5 hours in the middle of the night. It is so chilling and helpless.

I just hope that my children and I can return to China. Why is it so difficult for their families? Why can they treat their own grandson so cruelly?

(Picture provided by the whistleblower)

On October 1, 2017, my parents felt sorry for me because I was alone in Australia and had a hard time raising my children. They asked for leave to take time to fly across the ocean. He came to Australia for 15 hours to stay with me and help me take care of my children. To this day, Xiao Ping and I have not officially gone through the divorce procedures. After he learned about my parents' arrival, he ignored me. He had no filial piety and no kindness.

What’s even more disgusting is that he actually made a condition that as long as I agreed to him paying me 20,000, he would immediately sign the child support agreement and passport and let me return to the country smoothly. This means that the life of Xiao Ping's son is only worth 20,000. This kind of behavior is simply worse than animals, and it destroys humanity and morality. This behavior of their family forced me to file a lawsuit in the family court with no choice.

On October 16, 2017, because the child was approaching one year old, Australian doctors recommended that Chinese children need additional vaccines (BCG and JE vaccines). However, due to the serious shortage of BCG vaccine in Australia, the doctor suggested returning to China to get the vaccine as soon as possible.

(Picture provided by the whistleblower)

The next day, I told Xiaoping the news, hoping that he would agree to take my child back to China to complete the vaccination as soon as possible, and inform me of the return time. I didn't expect that he, a person who couldn't even take care of himself and whose personal hygiene was extremely dirty, actually told me that he would take care of the children.

The child is more than ten months old and the number of times he has changed diapers can be counted on one hand. What’s more, the child has not yet been weaned from breast milk. How can he take care of a child who cannot live without breast milk? I told him over and over again that for the sake of the child's health, if unexpected harm is caused due to delayed vaccination, will he be responsible for all the consequences? He actually said that I don’t need to worry about my child’s health! ! ! ! What a scumbag!

I, Xiaoyi, am heartbroken for Xiao Ping and his family. I am inhumane towards their family and overbearing. I have experienced it so vividly that I am heartbroken and exhausted.

(Picture provided by the whistleblower)

I swear on my own integrity that this letter is true and every statement is true. Finally, I beg the people of the country, the Chinese social media in Australia, and all social professionals to help me find a way to let Xiao Ping and his family release our mother and son back to China as soon as possible. I will be very grateful.

(The above remarks are self-reported by the whistleblower Xiaoyi and do not represent the views of Australia Today)

Today’s summary

Xiaoyi, who is only 25 years old, is currently very helpless , she just wanted to return to China as soon as possible to get her child vaccinated. However, she wrote in her self-report that the child's father did not agree to this simple request.