Just like a person drinking water, he knows whether it is warm or cold.

May 27, 2021? Thursday Sunny

In life, people should know whether it is warm or cold when drinking water. If it can be kept at normal temperature, it will be just right. If it is too hot, it will be easy to get injured and heartache. , there is no direction in the eyes, too cold, easy to be sentimental, and when the emotion is weak, there will be a lot of sadness.

I have been wandering outside for the past two years. To outsiders, I live a very comfortable life. As a "Light of the West" visiting scholar, I can learn knowledge and study in the most advanced medical palace in China. Draw strength and, as a accompanying mother, you can spend most of your high school years with your children in Beijing, which is really killing two birds with one stone. In fact, there is too much pressure and sadness during these days of wandering outside.

I have been living in a small city. In the past, my husband had to help me buy train tickets, book air tickets, etc. In our small city, I couldn’t figure out the southeast, northwest, and after decades of walking I often get lost on the roads. However, when I arrived in Beijing, a city dozens of times larger than my hometown, I learned to use Didi Taxi, Gaode Map, take the subway, etc., and never got lost again. Moreover, ordering takeout, sending things, buying tickets, etc. are also very easy to operate online. I am proficient in everything and no longer need help from others.

Originally, my ability to live independently was very poor and I couldn’t cook or do housework. But in Beijing, my daughter and I depended on each other. Housework, shopping for groceries, cooking, etc. Slowly, I got exercise in these tedious housework chores, and arranged the lives of myself and my daughter in a colorful and colorful way.

I also have to deal with all aspects of neighborhood relations with the doorman, landlord, and neighbors. It seems that I have never had to worry about these things in my hometown, because in my hometown, the neighbors around me have been here for decades. The old neighbors know each other well and have a close relationship. But now we have to maintain a good neighborly relationship with strangers, and never look up or down. Distant relatives are not as good as close neighbors. If the relationship is very tense, it will be difficult to get along with each other, and it will make you feel heartbroken.

In addition to becoming independent in life, you also have to deal with various emergencies encountered outside. I remember the days of centralized quarantine last year as the most unforgettable memory in Beijing. In May last year, I stayed in a room at the Hanting Hotel in Beijing’s designated centralized quarantine facility for 14 days, alone with my shadow, and spent the first lonely days of quarantine in my life.

In June last year, my daughter was quarantined alone in the Wanggui Hotel in Beijing. She was alone in the hotel and had to change dressings for the wound on her back. She endured the days of loneliness alone without her parents or relatives. Accompanied by teachers, classmates, and classmates, this is the first time since she was born that she has lived alone.

Those days of isolation during the epidemic made us stop our hurried steps, think quietly, and slowly settle down, only to realize that except for life and death, everything else in this world is trivial. Life is not easy for everyone, but living is happiness, and living has hope. No matter how big the matter is, pick it up and put it down. "Heavy as a mountain" or "light as a feather" is just a matter of thought.

After the test of isolation, I came to Beisan Hospital to study. In the first few months, except for rest days, I followed the teacher to see more than a hundred patients almost every day, from morning to night, except after lunch at noon. After that, I lay down on the table in the conference room on the fifth floor and squinted for a while. The rest of the time was spent constantly asking questions, writing medical records, doing gynecological examinations, taking notes for teachers, etc. Those days were really hard. I rode a bicycle to work before dawn. When I got off work, the sky was full of stars. I couldn’t see the sun all day long. It was always dark. It made me feel like I was back when I was an intern. I was really exhausted both physically and mentally. .

I finally looked forward to the Chinese New Year holiday last year. Unfortunately, due to the epidemic, my daughter and I were unable to return to our hometown. The two of us celebrated the New Year in Beijing. This was the first time for us to celebrate the New Year away from home. "I am a stranger in a foreign land, and I miss my family even more during the holidays." Since the Chinese New Year, my daughter has been saying, "I want to go home!" I have been comforting her by saying that it will be soon and I will go home after the college entrance examination.

Actually, why don’t I want to go home? I often dream that I fell asleep on the sofa at home, and my mother tiptoed to cover me with a blanket.

I often dream about my old house, a flash flood breaks out, and I go to rescue my elderly parents. I haven’t seen my relatives in my hometown for almost a year, how can I not miss them?

When you are out alone, you have to carry everything yourself. Unlike in my hometown, where I have friends and acquaintances wherever I go, it is very convenient to do anything. Even if my parents go to the hospital for a medical check-up, they can just ask my old classmates for help. There are not so many cumbersome procedures. Small cities are a society of acquaintances. I know friends from all walks of life in my hometown, so I feel that doing things is easy. In big cities, you have to queue up to register for medical treatment, make reservations in advance to go to scenic spots, and wait in line to get a ticket when going to a restaurant. No matter what you do, you have to make reservations and queue up, which is really troublesome.

In the past few months, because I had to complete my thesis, I finally had free time. I went to work in the morning and went to the library to check literature and read information in the afternoon. I felt much more relaxed. However, as soon as I get home, I have to cook and do housework, which is non-stop. After finishing all this, I will send my daughter to school, and then stay at home alone.

Listening to the whistling wind outside the window, the windows crackling, and watching the shadows of the trees swaying violently in the wind, even though I have lived in Beijing for more than a year, I am still not used to the strong wind here, no matter what It is spring, summer, autumn, winter, day or night, whether it is sunny, rainy, or icy and snowy, the wind really blows day and night, completely capable of destroying everything. In the north, there are strong winds, little rain, dry weather, and dry weather. My skin, which used to be smooth and smooth, has become extremely dry and rough. I originally thought that spring would be better in the north, but I didn't know that the terrifying sandstorms and willow catkins filling the sky are even more frightening.

Summer is finally here, and the weather is getting warmer. I have been wearing skirts these days, but I didn’t know that I caught a cold after walking a few times outside yesterday. After all, the wind was so strong that it gave me a splitting headache. I am afraid of the cold, so I quickly took 4 Lotus Qingwen capsules at night. I felt more than half better when I woke up this morning. If I drink more boiled water, I will be fine. It seems that my body is still doing well. In fact, I really don’t dare to get sick outside. If I get sick, not only will there be no one to take care of me, but medical insurance will not reimburse me, and I don’t have much money. Not only will I not be able to take care of my daughter who is about to take the college entrance examination, but it will also cause her a lot of trouble.

My daughter goes to school most of the time, and I work hard outside and do housework at home. When you are tired, no one will accompany you. When you are in a bad mood, no one will understand you. When you are helpless, There is no one to talk to you. Apart from calling your relatives and friends to talk, there is nothing else.

When a person lives alone, he always thinks about the vast sea of ??people, and we are just an insignificant speck of dust; in the vast world, we are just passers-by walking in a hurry; running around in the tide of people every day, looking for... ...Life is not easy, just like drinking water, knowing whether it is hot or cold, you still have to be kind to yourself!

After middle age, we all live with some worries and unspeakable pain, put the sadness in our hearts, and face the world with a smile every day. If you want to be treated gently by this world, you must have a strong heart and rely on your own efforts. No one can help you get out of the predicament except yourself. This is the most real life!

Look at the world with a flower, and the world is in the flower; look at the world with one eye, and the world is in front of you; look at the world with a heart, and the world is in your heart. Although life has joys and sorrows, gains and losses, it is not everything. It is like a person who drinks water and knows whether it is warm or cold. Beautiful scenery is worse than having a pair of eyes that discover beauty and a heart that feels happiness. Smiling away is the indifference and elegance of life.