What is the local custom of engagement in Xuzhou?

The engagement of young men and women in Xuzhou area is equivalent to the "Naji" in the marriage procedure in the pre-Qin period, which has continued to this day, but the ceremony has changed slightly. Engagement is the engagement of a man and a woman. There is no marriage law in China for a long time, so there is no need to go through the registration formalities with the government. Parents of both sides ask people to write something in writing, including house, man, anonymous, date of birth. Both men and women are willing to get married. This thing is called "paste"; Generally, the matchmaker is responsible for communication and informing each other of their respective situations, which is also called "changing posts". A little more complicated, there are "grass stickers", "fine stickers" and "fixed stickers". Post uses red paper to express happiness.

Change the sticker; It is a key symbol of engagement, indicating that marriage has been confirmed. In general, it is not allowed to go back on our word, and both sides are bound by social ethics. Therefore, a certain ceremony should be held to exchange posts, and the two sides should hold a family dinner to reward the "matchmaker" and inform the neighbors. In this way, the formal wedding will be aboveboard, reasonable and all the best.

For nearly half a century, this custom of "engagement" is still popular in many rural areas of Xuzhou. The engagement ceremony seems to be nothing to criticize, but some people often misunderstand that engagement is like nailing a board. Even if you find that there is something wrong with the other person and feel that it is not appropriate to get married, it is too late. After a rural girl got engaged, the man sent a message saying, Stop it. The girl went to the township government to sue him for breaking the law. The civil affairs assistant asked her what evidence she had. She took out the "post" and said that the "engagement" wine had been ordered. Obviously, girls equate posts with marriage certificates. In fact, after the promulgation of China's marriage law, "engagement" and "changing stickers" can only be regarded as the promises of both parents or themselves, and are not protected by law. Nowadays, urban residents in Xuzhou rarely do this.

I think, like you, when you get married, you should inform your family separately, and both parents can meet and get a marriage certificate. It shouldn't matter whether you are engaged or not.