Pre-marriage customs in Qiyang

Getting married is both a big and a small matter. How two people will live their lives in the future is the most important thing to plan in advance and try to be consistent. It's easier said than done. Things are unpredictable and plans can't always keep up with changes. However, the habit of full communication is very important and is the key to a harmonious life. cornerstone. It's okay for you to get married secretly and get a marriage certificate. Speaking of getting married, in a series of solemn and expensive ceremonies, the relationship network of two families is combined, which directly brings about the redistribution of interests. Secondly, conflicts and quarrels are inevitable. If nothing else, it will determine your future for at least 20 years. life trajectory for about years. From the perspective of someone who has experienced it: 1. Get acquainted 2. Meet the parents of both parties (pay attention to the timing of family gatherings such as holidays, birthdays, conversation, and attitude towards others) 3. Confirm your intention to get married (brothers and sisters, please make sure to meet all the family members after meeting them) , except for those who have made up their minds not to have contact with each other until death) 4. Do whatever you want (don’t always yearn for a honeymoon) 5. Get a marriage certificate 6. (dialect) The south asks someone to mediate, and the woman takes it seriously (if you don’t pay attention to tradition, you can ignore it) , because the cost is relatively high) 7. Betrothal gift in the south (the bride price is mainly money, which is convenient for the woman to buy a dowry and decorate the storefront) 8. Big purchases, decorating a new house, buying furniture, and taking wedding photos (although one is enough, but the wedding dress The store will generally recommend taking a copy) 9. Order the banquet, arrange the vehicle, contact the flower shop for floats, choose the wedding route, and send out invitations. 10. The wedding ceremony in Qiyang County is usually in the morning, the banquet for guests is at noon, and the quarrel between relatives and friends is in the evening. The bride puts on makeup, and the groom gathers the motorcade around 9-10 o'clock to prepare red envelopes for entry (small amount), red envelopes for crossing the bridge (medium), and red envelopes for entry (remuneration for serving the emcee, driver, etc.). The cannon is fired at an auspicious time and the departure is necessary. The journey is long and needs to be early, at noon Before November 11, the groom must return to the groom's house and the bride's house, where the groom washes his dust (symbolically washing his face) and welcomes his relatives and guests to drink consummation tea. Relatives and friends of the woman give a dowry (a small red envelope should be included in the quilt). Send red envelopes to bribe the gatekeepers and enter the boudoir to welcome the bride (see how the woman’s friends make trouble). Hold or carry the bride (depending on the quality and quality of the bride. It is best for the groom to practice beforehand. Never give up halfway) The bride gets on the float. Fire the cannon on the way back, drive slowly all the way, don't stop on the wrong road, and give out red envelopes when you encounter a bridge. The bride enters the house, fires cannons, steps over the brazier, washes her hands, offers tea to her parents-in-law, drinks early birth Takako soup, and sends off relatives and guests. Those who are quick-footed, have parents, are harmonious as husband and wife, and have children in groups "make the bed" (you can get red envelopes in the quilt); Before sending the groom and bride into the bridal chamber and sleeping together (symbolically), they choose a boy or girl whose elders are still alive, wealthy and upright to "roll in bed" (this red envelope usually has more red envelopes). 11. Wedding banquet: The luncheon is still early, so relatives and friends of both parties can talk, but it is better to send people to the hotel as early as possible to prepare. Half an hour before the appointed time, the bride and groom (the groomsmen and bridesmaids can help with the cigarettes) go to the hotel door to greet the guests, send their trusted people to collect the gifts, arrange for the young and old to be responsible for arranging the guests' seats, and prepare red paper and pen and ink at each table to register the guests attending the banquet. After the guests have basically arrived, the banquet begins. The bride and groom appear on stage together with the emcee, giving a performance of loving husband and wife, loving father and son, and harmonious family relationship. Important social relations people are also invited to give speeches and express their greetings to the newlyweds on behalf of the guests. blessing. The cronies collect the guest sign-in sheets for each table. The bride and groom start to patrol the table around the third and fourth courses (which may be postponed in advance depending on the size of the banquet) (usually the bride’s wine bottles are filled with boiled water). The bride offers cigarettes one by one (lighting the packets), and the toasts can be made all at once. The table has two cups, or you can come one at a time, depending on the situation. The couple's classmates and friends may make some century-old Haohe wine (a combination of several table soups, preferably with a strange smell that is difficult to enter the throat) to appetize the groom, or they may give the groom a high hat (to be funny and stable, and it is prepared on the spot). superior). After the newlyweds toast, they take a short rest. The confidants began to distribute "things" (usually wedding candies, daily edible oils and drinks, or all of the latter can be replaced by red envelopes). Afterwards, if the guests are not in a hurry to leave, the couple can have something to eat, otherwise they have to stand guard at the door to see off the guests. If there is a video camera or an external emcee is arranged, the confidants should also pay corresponding red envelopes (remuneration) at this time. After the guests have mostly left, the newlyweds can drink and chat with the remaining relatives and friends, which will be more relaxed. However, close associates should still be arranged to check the drinks to prevent waste and hotel employees from concealing secrets. Try to settle the bill with the hotel as soon as possible, and reserve the unused seats until that night to entertain relatives, friends and classmates from afar. Go home and count the gift money. It is best to deposit most of the cash in the bank in time.

I wrote down the favors (gifts) and the list of relatives and friends who were not present, and decided what to do the next day. 12. If there is a quarrel in the room, it is best to arrange for both parents to rest, because except for the newlyweds, they are the most tired and excited, and they are older. If they do not pay attention to maintenance, they will easily become extremely happy and sad. The quarrels between relatives and friends should be moderate, and the newlyweds should not be exposed to the cold wind in winter. If the newlyweds feel tired, it is best to expressly refuse to make noise in the room and fully enjoy the night. 13. When a child is born, relatives and friends usually come to see the baby and give red envelopes (actually it is for the parents of the child. Three Chaos wine is generally no longer favored by outsiders) 14. Three Chaos for children is different from wedding guests. Cherish blessings and pray for peace. It is not advisable to have a grand banquet. Only the people who are relatively close to you and the people who came to see the baby during the confinement period (those who gave red envelopes) may be really extravagant to get married like this, and leave some fragments of memories behind. Later people investigated the changes in Qiyang customs.