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What should a husband do if he finds his wife having an affair?

What should a husband do if he finds his wife having an affair?

How to deal with the husband's discovery that his wife is having an affair, it is inevitable that he will doubt his wife, even if he really has an affair. I believe that through treatment, both sides will be relieved and the family will be stable. Lucky Color is about how to deal with a husband who finds out that his wife is having an affair.

1 What should my husband do if he finds out that his wife is having an affair? 1. Handle his emotions properly.

Once it is confirmed that his wife is having an affair, normal people will have negative emotions such as anger, humiliation, depression, anxiety and injustice. It is normal for these emotions to correspond to the events that have happened. So, the first step is to accept these emotions; The second step is to have a safe emotional release.

Don't make any big decisions within three months.

Three months belongs to the period of acute psychological trauma, and any decision made at this stage may be emotional. This decision is not used to deal with problems, but to deal with feelings. At this stage, you can temporarily avoid problems, travel for a while, or travel to make room for your emotions and heart.

Third, make your own decisions.

The extramarital affair has happened, and now there are only two ways to choose:

Divorce: If you want to maintain your love concept, be a perfectionist and never allow yourself or others to make mistakes in marriage, then choose divorce. There is no right or wrong. You are fully qualified and entitled to choose your own lifestyle and marital status. However, it will make you very hard, and being harsh on your wife and relationship may lead to similar problems in future relationships.

Second, accept: accept that your wife is really having an affair, accept that this is only a challenge to your marriage, give yourself a chance to reflect and give this relationship a chance to grow.

Fourth, showdown with his wife.

If you have finished the above three steps, you can choose a time and place to talk with your wife. Time suggests not to be in the daytime, people's emotions jump in the daytime. Location suggests not to be at home, because it is easy to get emotional at home, which leads to emotional communication. It's best to tell your wife your decision at night, in the tea room outside.

If your decision is divorce, then you have to go through legal procedures. If your decision is to accept, I hope to continue this marriage. Then this problem is "a problem shared by you * * *" and needs to be faced together.

5. Let his wife handle his relationship with the third party.

The most stable relationship is the triangle relationship. You are having an affair because your relationship with your wife is unbalanced. In order to avoid more vicious results, such as impulsiveness, violence or divorce, you choose another person as the balance point of the relationship.

If you intervene in the relationship between your wife and a third party again at this time, it will strengthen the stability of this triangular relationship. Therefore, at this time, you are facing each other, which means that you have given your wife trust, support and time to deal with his role with a third party, instead of directly intervening, contacting and negotiating.

What should a husband do when he finds out that his wife is having an affair? Most married women focus on their families. When they get home, they have countless housework and have to educate their children, so they are often under greater pressure than men. In addition, my husband doesn't care about his wife and wants to find the feeling of being cared for, but he still wants to get together with friends every once in a while, and go out for a drink and massage to relieve stress from time to time. All the people who stay at home to look after the children are lonely women. So that the wife gradually began to look for external stimuli to fill the blank mind.

When a wife cheats, she often looks for an affair with a young man or a bad boy. They know how to make a married woman or a young woman care and considerate, and sometimes a sentence or two can make them very happy, saying that it is the era of new and bad men. New and bad men take some responsibilities when they are willing to take responsibility, and never wronged themselves when they are unwilling to take responsibility.

Men who are used to male chauvinism like to order their wives around like servants. When you get home, it is natural to hand over a cup of hot tea. He can chat with his buddies, have tea and take a bath after work, but you must go home early to welcome him back.

This situation makes the wife feel that she is a nanny, not a wife who needs to be loved. Over time, the wife's desire to find care outside will become stronger and stronger, and the possibility of cheating and having an affair will become greater and greater.

Men who are used to male chauvinism like to order their wives around like servants. When you get home, it is natural to hand over a cup of hot tea. He can chat with his buddies, have tea and take a bath after work, but you must go home early to welcome him back.

This situation makes the wife feel that she is a nanny, not a wife who needs to be loved. Over time, the wife's desire to find care outside will become stronger and stronger, and the possibility of cheating and having an affair will become greater and greater.

How to deal with the wife's affair? 3. How to deal with the wife's affair?

1, keep calm first and put an end to excessive violence.

When many men found out that their wives were cheating, they felt great humiliation. Men's dignity is facing great challenges, and their hearts are hurt. Under the influence of negative emotions, most men will be impulsive, lose their minds and find it difficult to calm down. But this time is often the most important. Once you are in a mess, you can't handle your wife's affair.

In addition, some men even take extreme measures, such as violently beating their wives and illegally detaining their wives. These are irrational and illegal acts, which can't solve any problems at all. Why use her mistakes to harm herself? Men should calm down at the first time and can't have excessive behavior.

2. Analyze the real reason for his wife's cheating.

There are many reasons why women cheat after marriage, such as emptiness and loneliness, disharmony between husband and wife, seeking physical stimulation, or just getting back at their husbands. All these will cause married women to cheat and become addicted. Therefore, after knowing that his wife is cheating, we must first find out the real reason for his wife's cheating, so as to fundamentally solve the problem.

The reason is unclear, just headless flies, to no avail. Besides, many times, when a wife cheats, it's not all the wife's fault. Otawa men are involved. It takes two hands to make a ring, which is the truth. If you fulfill your responsibilities as a husband, it will be difficult for your wife to cheat, so it is unfair to put all the responsibilities on women.

In addition, men should properly abandon the feudal ideas of the past. Why can men be forgiven for cheating, and women are almost "immersed in pig cages"? This is really too harsh on women. Anyone who truly repents should have the right to be forgiven.

3. Reflect on your shortcomings or mistakes.

As a man, being cuckolded by his wife is inevitable. However, you can't just blame your wife, you are also one of the parties, and you should also reflect on your mistakes or mistakes.

For example, are you cold to your wife? Does your skill satisfy your wife? Have you neglected your concern for your wife? Have you not told your wife that I love you for a long time? Finding fault with yourself may get twice the result with half the effort. One is conducive to the smooth recovery of his wife's heart, even if he doesn't want to recover it, it is also of reference significance to his next marriage or emotional life.

4. Don't divorce impulsively, and see if there is room for marriage repair.

When the wife is derailed and the marriage is on the verge of breaking up, we still have to work hard, don't divorce impulsively, and see if the marriage can be repaired and whether the wife's heart can be saved through practical actions, especially when there are young children at home.

You know, divorce is the best way to deal with marriage problems. You'd better think twice before you act. You must confirm whether this marriage is hopeless and whether the relationship between husband and wife really shows no signs of relaxation and recovery.

Think it over before you make a decision. This is your fault. If you want to save it, you must correct your shortcomings to save your wife's heart and forgive her for being possessed for a while. This is her fault. As long as she sincerely repents and can bear it, let go of her prejudices and give her a chance.

Of course, I really hate to part with it. Men with heavy male behavior suggest that it is better to stay together and divorce. Getting back together is just torture for two people.

Prepare for divorce, so that we can be together and settle down.

When you find that your wife is disheartened, refuses to admit her mistake and continues to cheat, it's time for you to get a divorce. Now that this woman has made a choice, don't make any noise, let alone stay, because her heart is not with you at the moment, and forcing her to stay will only make the other party more unhappy in the end, so let her be. Without feelings, it doesn't make much sense to continue to guard the empty shell of marriage. So, it's time for a divorce. However, it is necessary to sort out family property and deal with the problem of child support.

However, this way is undoubtedly to let you bear all the pain alone, so if you don't have an extraordinary mind, don't let yourself make such a decision reluctantly, otherwise you will only suffocate yourself.

However, let's just relax. Can't keep this woman and go to that man to pay for it? Sometimes some things are beyond our control, and it is not safe to keep a disloyal person around us. In this case, let her go, I believe the next one will be better.

6. When you can't be together, show the courage of a man.

Some women have to be reasonable when they cheat. Obviously, they did something wrong, and they confidently asked to share the property with you. And their infidelity will be very secret, and it will be difficult for you to find out. For such a smart woman, sometimes it will be difficult for men to parry. Therefore, you should also show your male dignity at an appropriate time, and don't let the other party get a bargain and report it.

Since she is so heartless, do you still need to go easy on her? Anyway, always attack that man first and tell him that stealing other people's wives will make you pay, so it's best to let them be together.

How can my wife get out of the shadows when she cheats?

1, communicate sincerely with your wife

Love is selfish, no matter men or women, no one wants to taste the taste of being betrayed by his lover. Sadness is inevitable, and it is strange not to worry at all.

Just specifically, you realize that there is already a problem between you and your wife, and you have the responsibility to understand this mistake. You know they still have an emotional foundation, and your wife has realized her mistake and is actively correcting it, and she is more mature. She is more and more concerned about her children and your feelings. It is human nature to make mistakes, and it is good to change them.

If you can't bear it, you can't live without it. Theoretically, you choose to forgive your wife's fault, but psychologically, you can't get through it. It is really unwise to torture yourself. Just don't blindly avoid and dodge, pretending to be confused.

To find a suitable opportunity, the two sides should communicate openly and clearly, at least to find out the real reason for his wife's infidelity. Only by running in more emotionally and knowing more about each other's needs can feelings be youthful and lasting, and there will be no adverse consequences.

I believe that time can forget everything.

The best way to get out of the shadow of his wife's infidelity is time, and time can dilute everything! Half a year, one year, three years, as long as you and your wife are more and more loving, this matter will naturally fade.

3. Recall the good things about your wife.

If your wife comes back after an affair, you can try to recall how much you loved each other, how happy your family is, how good she is, and how important a complete family is to the growth of children. Try to enjoy the family happiness now, return to the state of love, do it and cherish it.

Step 4 divert attention

There is an emotional foundation between husband and wife, and it is inevitable that there will be short-term pain after the wife cheats. If you want to solve the previous pain, you can divert your attention, find a hobby of your own and enjoy it, because the more you indulge in something, the harder it is to forget it. Only by trying to let go can we be happier. Giving others a chance is also giving yourself a chance.

How to prevent my wife from cheating?

1, with more * * * light at the same time.

The traditional concept of China people is that men dominate the outside and women dominate the inside. This understanding provides an excuse for men to ignore their families. Many women do housework as if their place were at home. But if a woman stays at home alone for a long time without a man, she will be lonely and bored. After a long time, she will want to go out from home to communicate and entertain. Under the psychological effect of loneliness, women are likely to be tempted by other men when they go out.

Because of this opportunity, the chances of cheating will increase. How can a woman have an affair if she doesn't go outside? Therefore, in order to prevent women from cheating, men should first take care of their families, give women more comfort, and let them stay at home with warmth after leaving home. In this way, women naturally reduce the chance of cheating.

If you don't attend your wife's activities regularly, you will naturally have more and deeper understanding of your wife's interpersonal relationship and know yourself. If the wife is not having an affair, moderate participation in her activities will improve the relationship between husband and wife. If the wife has ulterior motives, she can also find out in time and take precautions in time.

Don't do anything to hurt your wife.

Many women who have an affair are often because their husbands are not good to themselves. Of course, it is most likely that their husbands did something that deeply hurt their wives. If the husband beats his wife, cheats on her, or the husband has a lover outside. Or the husband is extremely indifferent to his wife, and the wife is pregnant, and the husband does not ask.

After these injuries, the wife will not take the marriage relationship seriously and will not take the initiative to refuse the temptation of the outside world. On the contrary, when you meet a man who is kind to you outside, you may not choose the best one by comparison.

3. Pay attention to whether the wife's life rules have changed.

Once a woman has an affair, she will naturally not be calm when she has an affair consciousness. If a man looks for it for a long time and can't find it, he can only say that he is too stupid. If the woman is outside and occasionally plays extramarital sex with others, it is mostly improvisation, and then it is over, which does not affect the normal life of both parties.

But once a woman has an extramarital affair, it will definitely change the law of life greatly. For example, phone calls, text messages, rules of going out, mood changes and so on. Therefore, when a woman has an affair, she will try not to change this rule at first, but as time goes on and feelings deepen, it is difficult to maintain this calm. When women often find excuses to justify their actions, they should pay more attention as men.

4. Let your female relatives be your wife's partners.

This has several advantages: first, it can make the relatives of both sides truly integrate and feel like a family. Instead of being separated from each other and burying each other. At the same time, take care of and support each other in daily life to eliminate loneliness.

The benefit of the outside world is of course to change the wife's daily communication environment, thus reducing the possibility of cheating. Also, relatives can play the role of supervision and information transmission. Although these do not need to be deliberately arranged, they will be conveyed through the daily words and deeds of their loved ones.

5. Know your wife's social circle.

According to Sun Tzu's Art of War, you should know yourself and know yourself. A wife is not an enemy, but it is not easier to prevent her own abandonment or betrayal than to deal with the enemy. To prevent his wife from cheating, that is to say, people who kiss again may have opposites. Otherwise, no one will leave.

Instead of doubting his wife casually, we should pay more attention to his social circle, friends, acquaintances and colleagues. If you have the opportunity to get in touch with these people, you will understand his wife's behavior style and conduct more comprehensively and truly. If the wife won't have an affair, it can enhance her confidence. If there are any signs, there is no need to wait for her to have an affair, take root and sprout, and then pursue it, and regret it.

6, to prevent his wife from becoming a leader for no reason.

If the wife is not an able person at work, there is no special relationship background. And suddenly become an important person or leader of the unit, often accompany wine, play, travel, then you have to pay attention to it and ask more questions. My wife often says that I have to work overtime at this time, so you should be more careful. If my wife used to be incompetent, but now she is finally shining, then don't worry.