What is self-restraint?

I took out the rope I had prepared for a long time and began to bind myself. First, the rope was wound around the ankle several times, and then in the middle, so that the feet were tightly tied. I tied my thigh in the same way, then I took out a long rope, tied my two big toes, and pulled it from the middle to the lasso I had made around my neck (the upper body was ready, just short). I had to pull it back hard so that my feet could touch my back to the maximum extent. It hurts, but I can't bear it. The rope came back to my toes and stuck to my back, so my feet and legs couldn't move at all. Then I blocked my mouth with a towel and wrapped my head with a rope, so that I was deprived of my right to speak and could only moan. I also like to cover my eyes, which will be more helpless and exciting. Finally, I put my hand into the lasso at the back of my neck, and after winding it tightly for several times, my hand was hung high behind my neck, so that my whole body was tied tightly. It's so uncomfortable. My whole body arched, my feet tied to my back and my hands tied to my neck. I started the most exciting struggle, so nervous, my mouth groaned, I reached the climax, my hands and feet were moving hard, but it was useless. My strength is exhausted. I'm tied up. I don't know what time it is because my eyes are blindfolded. I only know that after a long time, the whole body began to ache, and it began to loosen, which was more difficult. I turned over and held the knife in my hand. So it took a long time to cut the rope, relax my hands, untie my legs and feet, and take off my towel. This towel is wet. My saliva soaked the towel and the rope was wet. I was sweating all over, as if I had just come out of the water and fell asleep in a daze. ...