My wife is having an affair, and she is extremely sad. How should I control my sadness?

If you are honest enough, if you give up all your scruples, is it possible for you to cheat? You can deny that you will be dead set on the other half. You can admit that there is no thief's heart, no thief's courage and no thief's condition. I don't mean to interrogate you, but I just want to tell you that a recent survey shows that 80% of men in modern China families are not opposed to extramarital affairs! I don't need to remind you what extramarital affairs are like in real life. But I want to remind you that people who are having extramarital affairs are different from men and women, and men and women have very different views on extramarital affairs. Therefore, women who have extramarital affairs need to be more cautious.

We agreed not to expect the result, but I couldn't help it.

In mid-May, a women's federation released the Survey Report on Family Views on Marriage and Love. The report, written by experts from universities, surveyed more than 3,000 families of all ages for nearly a year. In this report, one thing is like this: 80% of men are not opposed to extramarital affairs. Also in this report, the survey on extramarital sex shows that two-thirds of women are against it. Extramarital affairs are common in our life. Men and women have different views on the attitude of extramarital affairs. In other words, women are more serious about extramarital affairs than men. And this gap in emotional input is often the root cause of differences.

"For more than a year, I have actually been in a state of tension. When we met, I was very nervous, as if all eyes were on me. I was also afraid when I didn't meet, afraid that he would suddenly leave me, leaving me alone to face the sadness and ridicule of the whole world. I am a bad woman to my husband and children, but I clearly know that I love him more. " For women, extramarital affairs test feelings more than natural love when they are single. If a woman is not really in love, few people will betray her for it. Heavy chips are not necessarily a good thing. "We are college classmates and first love. After graduation, we went our separate ways and lost touch. When they met in Kunming a few years later, both of them had families. " Old feelings rekindle, but I can't help it. This is the reason for many extramarital affairs. There is a lesson from the past, so it doesn't look like derailment, but more like continuing the frontier. It's just that everyone forgets that while you relive your old dreams, others are being hurt. "Like happen to coincide, we are all ready to move, we began to frequent contact. So, when we got drunk in the bar, he naturally took me to the hotel. That kind of feeling is unforgettable so far, and we seem to have returned to the lush years. Lying in front of her husband for the first time. Although my excuse was full of holes, he didn't doubt me. "As we all know, a wife is not as good as a concubine, and a concubine is not as good as a thief. It is under the stimulation of novelty that many people ignore their families. For people who have had an old relationship, their extramarital affairs are all too familiar. Nervous and exciting, extramarital affairs are like sugar-coated poison, and people often taste the sweetness first.

"We have a pre-announced agreement that will never affect each other's families, which is one of the reasons why we started this relationship at that time. I think this can minimize the damage to my husband and his wife. " For people in similar situations, it is not difficult to imagine that it is self-evident that it is difficult for two families to break up and reorganize. But don't expect the result, which will undoubtedly alleviate the guilt. However, human feelings, is it a faucet? "I must admit that I am happy with him every moment. This made me get carried away and get out of hand. My husband seems to have found something wrong, and I denied it, but the relationship between husband and wife was hurt. At that time, I was immersed in extramarital affairs and no longer took my husband's feelings seriously. " It is said that the IQ of cheating men is second only to Einstein, but this statement can't be taken seriously. The farce of chicken flying and dog jumping can be seen, and it has really become a party, which can be tolerated. Full trust in one's IQ is also one of the reasons for extramarital affairs. However, while you believe in your own IQ, you ignore the IQ of others. "I lost five pounds a month, very worried, afraid of exposure, afraid of him. Compared with before, I obviously rely more on him and ask for more and more meetings. At the same time, I can clearly feel his displeasure. When I became more and more clingy, we had a fight. He warned me that if I did it again, he would leave me. " Men are often more rational than women in the face of feelings. Many men think this way: they have no objection to extramarital affairs, but once they ask him for a divorce, he may not want to. Therefore, women who have extramarital affairs are destined to be passers-by in men's lives.

It doesn't matter if the relationship with your lover is not handled well. "The terrible thing is that my husband started to ask me for a divorce. He's not kidding. I know his character. Later, he moved out and gave the child to his parents-in-law. " You have to remember that no one really can't live without anyone, but it's not time to die. Without her husband's feelings, will her lover be the destination? "When I told him about my family, he was silent. Let's split up for a while. He said. Of course I know what temporary means. "In fact, men have understood that the rest should be forced to divorce, because women have lost their dependence. Love words, sometimes really just talk. It is not surprising that the ending is bleak. If injury is an experience, what can we get after injury? " I don't want to force him? I'm not a woman who cries twice and hangs herself three times. I chose to go back before divorcing my husband. This is a difficult process. With guilt and regret, I turned my head, but what was waiting for me was not necessarily the other side. When a divorce agreement was presented to me, I realized that I had ruined my marriage and family. "

Happiness is a temporary pain, but it is forever.

To make an inappropriate analogy, extramarital affairs are like cancer. Cancer cells lurk in everyone's body, just to see if they spread. And when we face other people's extramarital affairs, we always show contempt, as if we will be incompatible with this emotion all our lives, but I don't know that one day you may become a despised person. The protagonist of this case is a person with such a mental journey. "A year ago, a friend and a female netizen derailed. I gritted my teeth and cursed the man's shameless meanness. I couldn't wait to go up and tear him; A married young woman in the company was cheated by an asshole, and her parents were heartbroken and divorced. The children are very poor. Although sympathetic, there is also contempt. In just a few months, I experienced half my life, and I became the kind of person I looked down upon the most in the past. Even now, I feel unbelievable. "

"My husband and I are classmates. We were in love 10 years and married for 5 years. We already have children. We used to be a model couple envied by everyone. He was my first boyfriend. Before him, I had a crush on someone, which was very profound. My husband had emotional experiences before me, but none of them were profound. From the beginning of falling in love, just like living, it is plain and real. I can say that I have been with him since I was very young. Although he has many shortcomings, he makes me trust. " Not all extramarital affairs happen between couples with weak feelings, which is really frustrating. Sometimes extramarital affairs are monsters hidden in people's hearts, and it is impossible to predict when they will jump out and break the original calm and peaceful life. "He is my colleague, one year younger than me, married, childless, and his wife is also his classmate. He has established feelings since he was a child. It turns out that we work in the same department. I am an elder in this department. He came much later than me, but he didn't treat me like everyone else. Never call me elder sister, smart, conceited and self-centered. I didn't have a good impression on him at first, but I was easy to get along with. At work, I have always been unselfish, answered questions and treated all the younger generations equally, so I didn't feel anything special at that time. " The beginning of feelings, sometimes there is really no reason, even I would not have thought, why did I start feelings with a person? Therefore, we will attribute those seemingly impossible feelings to fate.

The office is a place prone to sparks. The rule of office workers is that apart from being with family, the most time left is being with colleagues. The intersection of work and communication outside work can easily make one person fall in love with another. "One day I helped him solve a problem at work, and he actually said on QQ,' Thank you, come and give me a kiss.' I froze for a moment and immediately thought it was just a joke. Unexpectedly, this sentence sowed the seeds of extramarital affairs. "Since QQ, I don't know how many families have been destroyed by this" little penguin ". Online dating, extramarital affairs ... It seems that any kind of feelings can be related to QQ chat. " Let's talk about work first, and then talk about men's and women's feelings slowly. Until one day, working overtime on weekends, he came to me, blocked me in the office and kissed me wildly. My mind is blank, and he smells fresh, which makes me crazy. A few minutes later, he left my office and said, "I'll wait for you downstairs." On that day, we went to check in "Everyone who has an extramarital affair has had the same emotion, that is, struggle and guilt, and at the same time it is fresh and exciting." He is very kind to me. When I am unreasonable, he follows me and sings to me. When I was depressed, he made me laugh, which made me rely on him and become more and more inseparable from him. But when I think about my husband, I feel guilty, but when I see him, I forget my feelings with my husband. "

"Because we often contact, my husband still knows. After several days' hesitation, I admitted everything to my husband. My husband asked me some details he had suspected before, and I answered them truthfully. He slapped me twice and then told me that he slapped my parents. Because your parents have always been proud of you, they will be angry when they know. My heart hurts, and I hurt my husband like this. "War without smoke is equally frightening. Extramarital affairs are a fishbone for marriage, stuck in the throat, and can't be swallowed without it. "He said he wanted to separate, but how can he live after separation? Whether you can find a suitable partner or not, it is not suitable for children. It can be said that both of us feel inseparable, just like a body that has grown into a whole, and no one can do it if it is torn apart. Husband and wife are like right-hand men. The two of us are trying to repair this relationship, just like the end of the past and the beginning, but I know that the process of rebuilding is extremely long, and I can only continue to work hard. "