Life requires loneliness

Have you ever felt lonely? The answer is probably self-evident.

What exactly is loneliness? According to the dictionary, it is a subjective feeling and experience of isolation and alienation from others or society, rather than an objective state; it is the self-enclosure of a person's living space and living state. Lonely people will live apart from social groups and live together. in a negative state.

This explanation is a bit complicated, professional and profound. At the same time, I don’t understand why loneliness has become a negative thing?

In fact, in my opinion, loneliness can be summed up in one sentence, it is an inner experience of finding oneself.

Are you lonely when no one eats with you? No one understands you, are you lonely? No one will accompany you through this life, are you lonely? Please note that this is not loneliness at all.

Because there is a kind of loneliness, which is the loneliness when you are in a crowd, the loneliness when you are analyzed by everyone, the loneliness when you have no space to be alone.

True loneliness is when your heart feels free, quiet, and peaceful. It exists in a state of emptiness, which can hold everything and take away everything.

As the poet Jiang Xun said: Loneliness makes you panic, but loneliness makes you full. As Zhuangzi said, communicating with the spirit of heaven and earth alone is to confirm that the dialogue between life and the universe has reached its most perfect state. .

As the poet Lin Xi described it: Probably, just at this moment, I can’t sleep and my head can’t function. I look at Beijing’s chaotic air, turbid sky, and hazy twilight on the hotel balcony. In the early morning, without any association or energy to read the video, I just stood there all night without knowing why. This kind of nothingness can no longer exist. It is completely unintentional, nothing gained and nothing done.

As the philosopher Schopenhauer said: A spiritually rich person pursues tranquility and leisure, that is, he strives for a quiet, simple life that is free from harassment as much as possible.

Because the richer a person is internally, the fewer external needs he has, and the less important others are to him.

Everyone is a lonely individual in this universe.

Maybe we are among the crowd, maybe we are surrounded by excitement all day long, maybe we never lack the company and attention of others.

But there will always be times when people have a state of mind that cannot be explained to outsiders. In this state, you can't get out, and others can't get in. At this moment, you are facing your true self.

But not everyone can calmly accept loneliness, a proposition that will accompany them throughout their lives.

Some people will choose to escape because they cannot calm down and listen to their inner voices, and they dare not face their true inner thoughts and decisions.

Only a very small number of people are willing to face their inner loneliness, and some people even deliberately create a sense of loneliness, trying to find their lost selves in this emotion.

I remember it was said in "Old Friends in Mountains and Rivers": Everyone can only accompany you for a certain distance, and sooner or later they will be separated.

There is such a line in the animated movie "Spirited Away": Life is like a train bound for the grave. There will be many stops on the way. It is difficult for someone to accompany you from beginning to end.

Another example is in "A Dream of Red Mansions", when Baochai reads this passage from "Parasite Grass": Mantling the tears of heroes, leaving the home of a virgin. Xie Merci was ordained under the lotus platform. There is no way we can separate in a blink of an eye.

Come and go naked without any worries. Where can I ask for cigarettes, raincoats, rain hats and rolls alone? As long as my mango shoes are broken and my bowl is broken, I will let it happen!

When Baoyu heard the sentence, "I am naked and have no worries," I seemed to realize something in an instant.

Of course, this also laid the foundation for his later becoming a monk.

Many times, the more people love prosperity, the lonelier they feel inside. Because he will feel afraid, afraid of being alone, walking alone in this world, no one cares about him, no one understands him, and no one can accompany him.

Even they may actually feel confused, confused, and at a loss. But escaping loneliness seems to be the best antidote for them to alleviate loneliness.

In fact, loneliness is the fate of everyone. You can’t get rid of it and you can’t get rid of it. Even if you fight against it all your life, you may not be able to become a person who is not lonely at all.

Loneliness is something you are born with. You will not be lonely just because you are alone, or you will be perfect just because you are accompanied by others.

When one day you realize the inevitability of loneliness, know that there is no escape from loneliness, and there is no need to escape, and you can achieve a state of reconciliation and comfort with it, then it will be considered true. growth and maturity.

Schopenhauer once said: Either you are lonely or you are vulgar.

Maybe when you were young, you would feel paranoid when you saw this sentence. But the older you get, the more you realize the profound meaning given by this sentence.

I wonder if you have noticed that from ancient times to the present, truly outstanding people must be lonely. And lonely people will eventually become outstanding people.

This is not to say that loneliness is a specific factor for success. But you can adapt to loneliness, be able to walk alone on an unsupported road, do something with little hope, be able to endure endless loneliness, and stubbornly stick to your inner world. You can see it, but in fact, you can’t. Something that might be seen and touched.

This requires not only courage and perseverance, but your absolute recognition and absolute belief in your entire life, as well as your belief in the person you want to pursue, the things you want to do, and the things you want to achieve. The dream that comes true has a kind of love that comes from the heart.

Kant was lonely and never married. Live a monotonous, boring, almost mechanized life all my life. His daily life, except getting up, drinking coffee, writing, lecturing, eating, and walking, all had fixed times and fixed sequences. He had never left K?nigsberg in his life, but in this extremely restrained life, He wrote the Critique of Pure Reason, which is regarded as the Bible by philosophers around the world.

Thoreau was lonely. He lived alone on the shores of the uninhabited Walden Pond for two years and two months. Staying with the sun, the stars, and the moon, getting along with the vegetation, wind, rain, mountains, lakes, birds and insects in nature. It was in this extremely lonely situation that he left behind such classics as "Walden Pond" A masterpiece.

Van Gogh was lonely. He stubbornly loved painting alone. He had no lover or friends, except for his brother Theo, who was the only one who could support and admire him. He left the noisy city and went alone to a field in southern France. Here, he shed tears and ran towards the sun, moved by the gorgeous and wonderful colors of nature.

In the eyes of local farmers, he was a madman who never talked to outsiders and would only run to the fields carrying a large bundle of canvas and paint. No one knows that it was this near-destructive loneliness that gave birth to the greatest oil painting "Sunflower" in human history.

There are very few outstanding people in this world, because there are also very few people who can adapt to loneliness and achieve themselves in loneliness.

Sometimes people need a sense of loneliness. Such loneliness is not intentional, it is not superficial detachment, and it is not deliberately keeping a certain distance from the outside world.

But a powerful motivation has been ignited in your heart, which makes you willing to stay away from the crowd, the excitement, and all the people and things that may interfere with and affect you. You are simple and naive. , Run towards it desperately, regardless of gains and losses, no regrets, and no regrets.

If you have this kind of perseverance, determination and courage, and can persevere, and infuse it into your life, even if it is full of suffering, pain and despair, you will never think of giving up the pursuit of truth, dreams and beliefs. How can people not be excellent?

Although loneliness is the normal state of life, we also know that in loneliness we can become more mature, perfect and outstanding.

But in essence, people are still afraid of loneliness.

Because if you don’t grasp its proportion and scale well, you can easily fall into a negative autistic state.

Some people even say that when I don’t think about it, I feel that life is very fulfilling, but when I have even the slightest doubt, I feel even more lonely.

Loneliness does not mean that you do not interact with others, but that you can have a clear positioning of yourself even if you are in a crowd, and you will not blindly follow the crowd and lose your ability to think independently and judge.

Loneliness doesn’t mean that you don’t need to talk, but that even if you can’t find like-minded friends, you can still find an outlet for your emotions, or you can be relieved through hard work, or you can talk through hobbies, or you can do nothing. But don’t deliberately suppress yourself.

Loneliness is not aloofness, selfishness, or arrogance. So when you feel lonely, you can maintain your own personality, style and habits, but you should and must have basic courtesy and respect for people and things.

Everyone’s life has countless moments of loneliness. It’s just that some people apply the right essence of it to the career they love, the things they want to do, and the future they hope to achieve.

And some people just choose to exclude blindly, putting the originally noble loneliness into a humble situation, to pray for others' mercy, sympathy and attention.

I remember Zhou Guoping once said that the reason why people need loneliness is for inner integration. The so-called integration means placing new experiences in an appropriate location in the inner memory.

Ning Yuan once said in "The Village Far Away": Loneliness is very necessary. What a person does when he is lonely determines the fundamental difference between that person and other people.

The writer Maugham once said: Each of us is imprisoned in an iron tower and can only rely on some symbols to convey his thoughts to others, and these symbols do not have the same value, because Their meaning is vague and uncertain.

We very pitifully want to convey the wealth in our hearts to others, but they do not have the ability to accept this wealth. Therefore, we can only walk alone, although our bodies are close to each other, we are not together, neither understanding nor being understood by others.

If we are destined to live alone in this life. Why not accept it calmly, face it, and reconcile with it.

More often than not, loneliness does not need to be endured, because loneliness is meant to be enjoyed.

It’s not that we have too many lonely moments, it’s just that there are too few moments when we feel lonely, so we are particularly prone to impetuousness and confusion.

As the artist Chen Wenling once said: Loneliness is a very noble emotion and a very luxurious life state.

If a person's cultivation, pattern and realm have not reached a certain height, loneliness will become something that makes people feel depressed, painful and unfree. But if you are willing to dedicate your life to living It has more texture, more depth, and more personal attributes. You must learn to put yourself in a situation where you are at a high place and feel the cold.

I remember Wang Zengqi once mentioned in the essay "Loneliness": If loneliness is not due to introversion, it is often due to excellence. People who are too beautiful tend to be lonely emotionally, and people who are too excellent tend to be lonely mentally. The reason is obvious, because they all have difficulty finding suitable partners. The sun is lonely, the moon is lonely, but the stars are countless.

Although being the sun and the moon will bring you light and poetry, you also need to endure the extremely plain life that no one appreciates, no one appreciates, and no one realizes. .

This kind of ability, capital and confidence requires a long time to practice like an ascetic. At the same time, you also need to endure the quite unbearable pain and suffering. But if possible, I wish you could have it.

I curled up my whole body and mind in the ocean of words, as lonely as a child.

Here, I use my pure original intention, that simple belief, and those things that do not have to be realized and may not be achieved in a lifetime. At the same time, it will not only make me happy, but also make me happy. It is painful, but the dreams and hopes that I can no longer let go of have illuminated and enriched my entire life.