Line of the skit "Porcelain"

Quotes from the skit:

Song: Hehe... We walk half way on the road to the sky. My motto in life is to sleep wherever I fall, because I He is a very dedicated and professional person. My mother once told me that a cook who can't cook is not a good driver at all.

Hey, what exactly do I do? Don’t worry. You will know right away. My equipment needs to be taken out in the same way. Don’t worry. This box requires a password. Don’t worry. Everyone must pay attention. Don’t be anxious. Don’t be anxious. Can you guess it? Don't be in a hurry. My newspaper is here. Come on (whistle) {Wen Song enters}

Article: ONE TWO 三

Song: Oh, oops

Article: Oh my god

Song: Oops

Article: Me

Song: Wow

Article: What’s up, uncle? What's up, uncle

Song: Step on my waist

Article: Oh my god, it's amazing

Song: Ah

Article: I stepped on your waist

Song: Ah

Wen: Then why don’t I feel anything at all?

Song: Look at your shame

Wen: You scared me to death

Song: If you had feelings, you would trample me to death

Wen: Why do you talk so scary

Song: Your feet are hot at the Flame Mountain. Stand at attention and sit down.

Wen: What's wrong, sir?

Song: Look what you look like

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Article: Mermaid

Song: I don’t think you have a human shape. What should I do if you step on me

Article: Then let’s go to the hospital to take a picture

Song: Are you busy?

Wen: Quite busy

Song: I knew you were quite busy. I guessed it when you came here just now You must step on me, so the uncle has taken all the pictures. Look, this one is a comminuted fracture of the calf bone. I took the wrong one. This is used when bumping into a big truck. This one is the head with the door down and the tail following. Comminuted fracture

Text: Oh my God, it’s so amazing. My foot will turn you into an invertebrate

Song: Don’t talk to me. What should I do about this? Let’s get money

Wen: I don’t have any money

Song: Do you have a card?

Wen: I have a card

Song: Then Great, I have a mobile POS machine here

Wen: Uncle, is this equipment tailor-made for me?

Song: I am purely professional, do you understand

Wen: Ah

Song: Do you want an invoice? "When opening stationery, you also talk about bathing?"

Wen: No

Song: No invoice Get the card

Text: Give

Song: bu ling bu ling bu ling bu ling What’s not working? What’s the main project of the big star beauty club? Breast enlargement and butt enhancement.

Text: Uncle, let me tell you, this is the card from my store

Song: I want a bank card

Text: Why didn’t you tell me about the bank card earlier? No

Song: You don’t have any. What are you talking about with me? Hurry up and call someone to send money

Wen: Don’t you just want money

Song: Yes

Wen: How much is it

Song: Eight hundred

Wen: Uncle, if you look carefully, can you tell what I do

Song: What are you willing to do for money?

Wen: Let me tell you that I am an aerobics instructor. One class is exactly one thousand. I will give you a 20% discount today, which is eight hundred. For just one yuan, we can settle everything

Song: What are you going to do?

Wen: Teach you aerobics

Song: I don’t want to learn

Text: If you don’t want to learn, you have to take a look and pay for it. I will never step on you in vain

Song: Hey

Text: Oops

Song: No, no, no, stop, oh, my God, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop.

Wen: No

Song: Stop, stop, and go. No need to pay. Go, before leaving. Let me ask you a question, are you a man or a woman?

Article: Oh my god, how can you ask me such a question in front of so many people?

I can only give you five words for the question: I really hate you

Song: There are so many people who hate me, who do you think they are?

Article: Bahhhh

Song: It's a bad start. I met someone like this when I went out. What will the next one be like? Let's wait and see {Yang Bing comes on}

Yang: {Singing} You are my eyes but I see Not in your past

Song: Ah

Yang: Ah

Song: Ouch, ouch

Yang: Oops

Song: Oops, ouch

Yang: Ouch

Song: Oops

Yang: What's up

Song: Oops You're holding my foot

Yang: I'm holding your foot

Song: See for yourself

Yang: I'm not holding it

Song: What are you looking at? Look at it again

Yang: Ah, it’s suppressed this time

Song: It’s suppressed, right?

Yang: Oops

Song: What should I do if you hold me down

Yang: Uncle

Song: Ah

Yang: Are you It's a porcelain thing

Song: Ah

Yang: Hey hey, then I'll give you the money

Song: Did you see that this is a person who is doing business? Just hurry up and give me the money without wasting anyone's time. Since you're so honest, I'll introduce you to my charging standards.

Yang: Ah

Song: I'm just an average person. Five hundred yuan at your feet, one thousand yuan on your feet, one thousand and fifty yuan on your feet. Seeing that you have such a good attitude today, I guess you are half-matched, isn't eight hundred yuan reasonable?

Yang: This price is very reasonable.

Song: Can you accept it?

Yang: I can accept it too much. I paid someone a thousand if I touched someone the day before yesterday. Hehehe

Song: You See why I'm so cheap. Because I make small profits but quick turnover

Yang: Ah

Song: Do you know that I will leave as soon as I can see the profit?

Yang : That uncle

Song: Ah

Yang: I don’t have a penny in my pocket right now

Song: Not a penny less to talk to me about this It’s useless

Yang: Hey, I’m not a master like you. Listen to me

Song: Ah

Yang: I am a very special person. Honest

Song: Ah

Yang: What about me, please give me some time

Song: It will definitely not be easy for you to leave

Yang: I’m definitely not going to leave. Just cooperate with me. Just don’t move. We’ll stay here for a while. I’ll give it to you once I’ve earned enough money, okay?

Song: You have to be able to get me money. I can cooperate with you in any way you want

Yang: That’s done, just wait for me for a while

Song: But don’t let me work, do you understand?

Yang: I can't let you work

Song: What do you want

Yang: Thank you for being a good man and having a safe life. Thank you

Song: Stop it, what are you doing?

Yang: Can’t I make money for you?

Song: I’ll use you if you make money like this. This money is for me. I know it’s not you who pulls it off well, but I’m the one who grows it. It's so pitiful. Can we stop making trouble like this? I'll give you two hundred yuan and you can leave quickly.

Yang: Then it's not okay for you to talk like this. How can I ask for your money?

Song : I can see that I am a porcelain dealer and you are a porcelain dealer.

Yang: You, listen to me, I won’t give it to you today, so don’t give it to me either. There are risks in your line of work, right? One day, when your legs are discounted, then you come to me. Can I leave you a business card? There are not many people in your area. When you go to the small square, there are a lot of people there.

Song: Ah

Yang: I was just talking nonsense and you were kneeling over there, making 800 yuan a day like it was a play

Song: Please don’t introduce me

Yang: Just listen to me, bye

Song: Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, let’s meet someone on the aisle

It's quite embarrassing to meet a cyclist today. I'll see if there's a luxury car for me to bump into. {Jiaojiao drives up} Hehehe

Jiao: Ah

Song: Ouch

Jiao: Ah

Song: Oops, keep going forward. Oops, keep driving.

Jiao: Ah

Song : Oops, my feet are pressed, ouch ouch

Jiao: Ah

Song: Oops

Jiao: Ah

Song: Oops

Jiao: Ah

Song: Oh, you must be a female driver

Jiao: Ah

Song: Oh, oh, my mother, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Oops, wait a minute

Jiao: Ah

Song: Don't move. Don't come out to the rehearsal. I'm not forcing you to go back

Jiao: Ah

Song: Oops, come out

Jiao: Ah

Song: Oops

Jiao: Oh, my God {say it in English}

Song: No more pressing down

Jiao: Ah

Song: Ah

Jiao: Are you okay, uncle

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Song: Look, my legs have already been bent up to here. If they were bigger, they would be broken.

Jiao: Uncle {say Encore in English} I just came from Hong Kong Come here

Song: Where are you from?

Jiao: Hong Kong

Song: Oh, it’s from Hegang, Heilongjiang

Jiao: Ah, uncle, {say encore in English}, what do you want?

Song: Take your time, you think you’ve hit the uncle, then you can give me money

Jiao: I didn’t bring any RMB

Song: Hong Kong dollars are fine too

Jiao: I was in a hurry when I left Hong Kong dollars

Song: Young people are unreliable if they want to default on their debts Ah, it's useless to talk to me.

Jiao: Wow

Song: I have to finish the scene first

Jiao: Oh my God Na {Speak in English for buying Karma}

Song: Hey

Jiao: Oh wow

Song: Hey, the scene is already done

Jiao: Ouch

Song: You young people, if I tell you the truth, no one will believe me. Don’t talk to me. It’s useless. Go away, close up, okay

Jiao: Oh my god {saying it in English}

Song: Hey, very professional

Jiao: Uncle {saying encore in English} You are really It’s so international and so fashionable {Say it in English, you can turn over}

Song: Do you think this kid of yours has a long-term heart? I’ve been bumped into like this and you still say that I don’t turn over. How can I? Fanshen

Jiao: I mean, you are very professional when it comes to porcelain, uncle {saying encore in English} I think it is really problematic for us to communicate like this {saying inserting in English}

Song: It’s not a problem {it’s not a joke in English}. You’re almost making me angry. Just do this. Find someone who can communicate clearly with me and ask him to bring money to do this. What's the matter? Do you have any friends in Mainland China?

Jiao: My husband is from Mainland China

Song: Call me quickly

Jiao: But my husband fights in the UFC Ah

Song: Who are you trying to scare? I want to fight UFC. He wants to do whatever he wants. I have the ability to let him send me back to the west.

Jiao: Uncle {say the encore in English}, but you are the only one. I'll KO you in three seconds like this

Song: Oh, don't scare me with KOKO. It'll be fine when he comes

Jiao: I'll call you then

Song: Come on, these young people are unreliable

Jiao: Hey, husband, I’m in trouble, he’s trying to get me wrong, come on, come on, come on, come on and help, OKOKOK

Song: No KO

Jiao: Oh uncle {say encore in English} but I still have to remind you, when my husband comes, you must not look into his eyes. He has an occupational disease and everyone in the circle calls him a little beast.

When you look into his eyes, he will think you are provoking him and he will KO you in a minute

Song: Just can’t look at him

Jiao: Don’t look at him

Song: Why don’t I believe it? Let him cripple me and break my whole body. I will have land in the next life.

Tian: Who is the cheater? Who is the cheater? Ah {looking at the audience}

Jiao: No

Tian: {challenging the audience}Watch what I am doing. Do you want to challenge me? Believe it or not, I will KO you or something.

Jiao: Calm

Tian: Guillotine

Jiao: Oh, you are not him, husband, hurry up and admit defeat, slap him three times, hurry up

Tian: I guess you’re a quick shooter

Jiao: You’ve got the wrong person, husband! The porcelain guy is behind you

Jiao: Oh, no, husband

Tian: Why are you looking at me like this?

Jiao: Oh, husband, you are such a tiger, let me go, hurry up

Tian: What's wrong

Jiao: Am I cheating on this tiger?

Tian: Ah

Jiao: Oh, my husband, the cheater is behind you

Tian :Ah, dear, I’m sorry, I lost control again. I told you not to look into my eyes

Jiao: Behind you. Behind you

Tian: Where

Jiao: What’s behind?

Tian: Are you touching the porcelain

Song: Ah

Tian: Are you touching the porcelain

Song: I haven’t even moved anywhere yet I’m here

Tian: Come out of the circle

Song: I can’t get out of this circle

Tian: Why

Song: Wukong hasn’t come back yet

Tian: Are you bullying that my wife is from Hong Kong?

Song: I, I have evidence

Tian: Come with me, this trick won’t work

Song: I have evidence

Tian: What evidence

Song: I left photos at the scene. I just Photo

Tian: Is this you? Are you confused by me? Is this you?

Song: Look, this is useless. Why didn’t you talk about me? What I just said Aren’t you wearing glasses? You, you, see if that’s me. Take a look for yourself. Hey, hey, hey.

Jiao: Hey, my husband. [Hey, someone is coming quickly.]

Tian: You Are you dissatisfied?

Yang: Hey, hey, stop

Tian: Believe it or not, I will lock you up

Yang: Stop, stop, stop, stop, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Stop

Song: Oh, you are hurting my waist

Yang: What are you telling me? His waist is not good, why are you using so much strength?

Tian: He looked at my eyes

Song: You are so ugly that you are not out of the show

Yang: Okay, okay. I think Song Dabao’s performance in this episode is good. We are in Liaoning. This work of the folk band is mainly to warn the lawless elements in society to stay away from the porcelain industry. Our society is full of love. Don’t think that your bad methods have polluted our society full of positive energy

Song: OK

Yang: I wish everyone a safe trip. Thank you everyone. Xiaobao, your performance in this episode was also good. As the leader of the group, I am very happy and satisfied. Thank you

Expand Information:

The cast of "Pengci":

1. Song Xiaobao

Song Xiaobao, whose real name is Song Baoli, was born on January 5, 1981, in Tonghua City, Jilin Province A native of Guangming Village, Loujie Township, Huinan County, he is the 32nd apprentice of Mr. Zhao Benshan, an actor and comedy performing artist from Mainland China.

2. Wensong

Wensong, formerly known as Shi Wensong, was born in Yingkou City, Liaoning Province on June 9, 1986. He is a film and television actor in Mainland China.

In 2014, he completed his first TV series and participated in the country comedy "Harvest Season", thus officially entering the entertainment industry.

In 2015, as an assistant, he participated in the Dragon TV comedy competition program "Happy Comedian" with the Song Xiaobao team of the Liaoning Folk Art Troupe.

In 2016, the costume comedy "Happy Secret Agent" in which he starred premiered.

In 2017, he participated in the Dragon TV comedy reality show "Happy Comedian Season 3" and won the finals championship with the sketch "New Langya Bang"; in the same year, he participated in the Republic of China sitcom "Fengtian Hotel" Plays the male protagonist Zhu Yiqun.

In 2018, the comedy movie "Scream Live" starring him was released.

3. Yang Bing

Yang Shulin, whose real name is Yang Bing, was born in Tieling City, Liaoning Province in 1986. He is the 22nd disciple of Mr. Zhao Benshan, an actor and comedy performance artist in Mainland China.

In 2012, he gained everyone's attention for participating in the Spring Festival Gala of the Ministry of Public Security and cooperating with master Zhao Benshan in the sketch "Meeting on a Narrow Road".

In April 2015, he participated in the celebrity comedy competition reality show "Happy Comedian" and has performed wonderfully in works such as "New Shanghai Beach", "The Legend of Zhen Huan" and "Not Short of Money 2". .

In March 2016, in the second half of the competition for the second season of "Happy Comedian", he was successfully starred by Zhu Yan. In the eighth episode of "Let's Get Married", Yang Shulin and Pang Ya appeared together. A bizarre "marriage plan" was staged.

In September 2016, he participated in the celebrity cross-border comedy competition show "Cross-border Comedy King" and partnered with Li Yugang in "Maweipo" and won the championship agent.

In January 2017, in the musical comedy variety show "Awesome!" In "My Song", Yang Shulin and Li Yugang jointly sang "Drunk by Drinking alone". The show was broadcast for half a month, and the total number of views of the video has exceeded 100 million.

In May 2017, Yang Shulin attended the opening ceremony of the soft science fiction movie "Super APP" in Guangzhou as the starring role.

In February 2018, he and Wang Bowen participated in the Beijing Satellite TV Spring Festival Gala sketch "That Night of Spring".

In the same year, he participated in the action comedy film "Moths Crossing the River" directed by Xiao Shenyang, which is scheduled to be released on June 15.

4. Tian Wa

Tian Wa, also known as Tian Dou, was born on September 24, 1985. She is a native of Xinmin City, Shenyang City, Liaoning Province. She is an actor.

Tian Wa studied under Liu Diancai and Zhao Benshan.

After he went out to film in Xiao Shenyang, he has become the new pillar of Liu Laogen's big stage Beijing Theater. The rising popularity on the Internet and the attracted audiences are proving to the outside world that he is "the next Xiao Shenyang" ——Tian Wa has risen to become a rising star in the duo.

Played Wang Musheng in "Country Love 7-9".

Representative works include "Country Celebrity", "Veteran", etc.

5. Jiaojiao

Jiaojiao, female, whose real name is Zhang Yujiao, was born in 1986, a member of the "Unknown Group" and an actor under Benshan Media.

The "Unknown Group" won the runner-up in CCTV's 2011 "Avenue of Stars" finals.

She made a wonderful appearance in the 2013 CCTV Spring Festival Gala skit "I Want to Go to the Spring Festival Gala" and was well received.

Zhao Benshan commented that "ugly women are national treasures." She and Sun Lirong were hailed as the two best "ugliest women" among the duo actresses in Benshan Media.

She and Zhang Yao were named the "Legendary Group" by judge Liang Hongda for their performance of "I Am a Little Bird" on the Avenue of Stars.