Crystal Road Fanwai (23)

Early the next morning, Jing He went to the affiliated hospital of Fort Idaho Medical University to queue up for an abortion. Although any hospital or even a small clinic can have an abortion, Jing He doesn't want her family to know about her pregnancy. If everyone knows about it, the child will definitely be left behind. She asked Qulan last night, and Qulan told her that the hospital affiliated to Attenborough Medical University had better abortion operation and postoperative service, so she could sit alone in the hospital to see the little girl. When the big screen showed the pinyin of "Jing He", Jing He walked into the operating room alone, leaving only peace in his heart. She was lying on the operating table, and a line of tears inadvertently flowed out of her eyes, thinking: I'm sorry, dear baby, it's my mother's fault that I couldn't bring you into this world and give you the best love. The operation began, and Jing He closed his eyes gently. Tears in the corner of my eyes are still there, and my heart is still aching. My heart is hurting, but my tears are there.

Half an hour later, Jing He was pushed back to the ward. She silently thought with tears in her eyes: Cheng Xiao, if you were by my side, would you hold my hand, kiss the back of my hand and gently call me baby? Will you let me keep the baby or accompany me to have an abortion? Anxiously wait for me to come out outside the operating room and feed me your own chicken soup. At this moment, you should be lying in the big bed in the hotel with that woman. You will call her baby, and that woman will lie in your arms in sexy underwear. Would you please be kind to me? Just like me and you every time afterwards. However, this time is different. You don't have to get up early, and no one bothers you. Thought of here, tears from the corner of my eye, Jing He sadly close your eyes.

In the darkness, she heard the familiar voice again: "Baby, baby". Every sound is lighter and softer than every sound. Jing He struggled to open his eyes, but the room was empty and his eyes blurred again.

She closed her eyes and fell asleep, and met her sweetheart in her dream. Cheng Xiao took her hand and ran in the endless sea of roses. Today, Cheng Xiao is wearing a white suit, just like on her wedding day. I'm wearing a dress with roses on a white background, and only the last blush is left in the sky. There is a faint scent of roses in the air, and pink bubbles are floating in the air. Cheng Xiao took Jing He's hand and ran in tandem. He Jingxiao laughed and laughed. Tired of running, they lay on the grass and kissed each other. Cheng Xiao whispered in her ear, "I love you".

In a blink of an eye, she came to the door of the first obstetrician Cheng Xiao's office. He took the box and tapped on the door, and a familiar voice came: "Jin". She pushed open the door with a smile, only to see Cheng Xiao and Qu Lan lingering. Inadvertently, he came to the door of a hotel room. The door was not closed. She walked in quietly and saw Cheng Xiao holding Angel down.

In an instant, she went home. The door was half open, and she went in and shouted, "Dad, Mom, Cheng Xiao, Yingying, I'm back." But no one promised: "Angel, go and ask Cheng Xiao's parents to come over for dinner and let Cheng Xiao take Yingying to wash her hands." Dad said.

"okay. Dad has worked hard and loves you. " Angel said. Jin Ming said, and hugged Qu's neck and kissed him on the face.

"Kiki, you are so old, and you are still in Dear Dad. You don't know shame. Be careful for a while. " Dad said.

"He won't." Angel said.

"Mom, I finished washing my hands. Give me a hug. " Yingying ran to the angel and said.

Jing He walked to Yingying and tried to pick Yingying up. Yingying is like a bubble, it disappears when touched.

"Yingying, I'm mom." Jing He said.

Yingying didn't seem to hear at all, and said to the angel, "Mommy, hurry up".

The angel picked up the sky through Jing He's body. He saw Cheng Xiao surrounded by angels from behind and kissed him gently on the cheek. Blink of an eye, Jing He came to Yingying's car accident that day. However, what happened was not her baby daughter, but Cheng Xiao.

Jing He cried and shouted, "Look out, Cheng Xiao".

But Cheng Xiao didn't hear it. She tried to stop Cheng Xiao, but she couldn't stop him. She saw that Cheng Xiao was hit by a truck and there was blood all over the floor. Jing He woke up crying, only to find that it was just a big dream. The ward is still empty, and the white fluorescent lamp is dazzling. She was stabbed so badly that she covered her eyes with her hand and fell asleep again. He woke up in the dark and she found herself lying in the middle of an empty basketball court, standing barefoot on the ground. Suddenly, a beam of light spilled over. Yingying was wearing a white princess dress, and there was a boy in a small white suit behind her, hiding behind Yingying and timidly asking, "Sister, who is she?" .

Yingying said with a black face, "A bad guy, a bad guy who ruined our family."

Jing He's heart was broken, and she said in a trembling voice, "I ... I'm your mother." . "

You are not my mother. My parents divorced because of you. It's all your fault! I hate you! "Sky toward Jing He roar loud. Yingying stretched out her little hand and hit Jing He, then ran away.

Not far away, it's Cheng Xiao and Angel. Yingying jumped at them, and the family walked away laughing and talking. One after another, these dreams trapped Jing He.

Meanwhile, Zhu Aiping and Zhao Xin are looking for Mr. and Mrs. Jing He on the streets of Los Angeles. Shortly after leaving the community, Zhao Xin received a phone call from Cheng Xiao. Zhao Xin anxiously asked, "Hey, Cheng Er, where are you"?

On the other end of the phone came a heavy man's voice full of Beijing dialect: "Hello, are you Mr. Zhao Xin?" I am the owner of a bar in Beijing, and your friend is drunk here. Can you pick him up as soon as possible? Because we're going to close this place. "

"Okay, I'll be right with you. Can you tell me your address? " Zhao Xin asked.

"A Beijing bar in Jiao Jiao Lane, Queen Street 1 1203," said the owner of China.

"Okay, I'll be right with you. Thank you. " Zhao Xin said. After that, Zhao Xin immediately stopped a taxi in the street and quickly told the master the address in American English.

The taxi started slowly. Zhao Xin called Zhu Aiping: "Hello, did you find Jing He there?" ?

"Not yet. Los Angeles is too big. Where can I find it? How about over there? " Zhu Aiping asked.

"I'm going to find Cheng Xiao. I am going to pick him up now. " Zhao Xin said.

"So fast, be careful. See you later. " Zhu Aiping said in surprise.

"Goodbye." Zhao Xin said.

"Goodbye." Zhu Aiping said. Zhu Aiping finished, Zhao Xin hangs up the phone.

Ten minutes later, Zhao Xin came to a Beijing bar. It's a dark bar. There is no light on the door, and it is still dark inside.

Zhao Xin pushed the door and saw Cheng Xiao drunk. Zhao Xin went over and helped Cheng Xiao to the bar and asked, "Pay the bill. How much is his big table of wine?"

"Oh, he has already given it." China shopkeeper said.

"Thank you, please." Zhao Xin said.

When Zhao Xin helped Cheng Xiao turn around to leave, the shopkeeper in China stopped Zhao Xin and said, "You'd better buy him some hangover medicine, or give him some honey water, which is available in the hangover medicine pharmacy."

"Ok, thank you." Zhao Xin said. Say that finish and left the bar.

Meanwhile, Zhu Aiping is blindly looking for Jing He in the streets of Los Angeles. Los Angeles is so big that it is as difficult to find Jing He in a sea of people as looking for a needle in a haystack. Zhu Aiping is well aware of these reasons. Difficult, really difficult. However, as long as I think of Aunt You's anxious appearance in the morning, Zhu Aiping dare not give up looking for Jing He easily. But where to find it? In the past, he must have tried his best to find Jing He, but now where can he find a stranger? Time passed by bit by bit, and Zhu Aiping fell into despair bit by bit. Turn on the mobile phone, WeChat voice phone, SMS, voice message, phone ... Zhu Aiping has tried all the contact methods that should be used, but Jing He hasn't replied to any information or made any phone calls.

Zhu Aiping was desperate. What happened? No matter what happened before, Jing He will tell himself, what happened today? Zhu Aiping was completely desperate. She took out her mobile phone and prepared to call her friends in China. But she forgot that it is night in China. Yes, it's late at night in China, and everyone is sleeping. She squatted on the ground in despair, her hands clasped her knees and took a deep breath.

At the same time, Cheng Xiao returned home and got rid of Zhao Xin's help. He rushed to the wine cabinet, took a bottle of red wine and drank it, then dug out a bottle of sleeping pills. Zhao Xin rushed over to grab sleeping pills, slapped Cheng Xiao and shouted, "You are crazy! Is it worth it for a woman?

"yes! I'm crazy, I'm crazy, I almost slept with Angel yesterday, and my Jing He will be sad. " Cheng Xiao said he was drunk.

"Can you wake up? Jing He left and hasn't come back yet. She won't come back. " Zhao Xin said.

Zhao Xin's roar brought Cheng Xiao back to reality, and Cheng Xiao quieted down. Cheng Xiao sat on the ground sadly, his eyes without god. She said to herself, "She's gone, she's gone, my wife's gone".

Zhao Xin has never seen such a journey and such an injury. Zhao Xin looked at such Cheng Xiao and thought: This probably means how much you love and hurt. He sighed, went over and squatted down to help Cheng Xiao and helped Cheng Xiao back to his room. Cheng Xiao lay down and fell asleep. Zhao Xin carefully tucked Cheng Xiao in and left gently.

Downstairs, I saw Zhu Aiping come back dejectedly, sitting on the sofa with his head down. He went to the sofa with concern and sat down. He asked softly, "Wife, what's the matter?

"No, I just didn't find Jing He, didn't answer the phone, and didn't reply to WeChat. There is no way out. " Zhu Aiping said gloomily.

Zhao Xin lovingly took Zhu Aiping into her arms and said, "Thank you, dear".

Zhu Aiping patted Zhao Xin with a sweet smile and said, "disgusting, let go quickly, and the children will come back to see it later."

Although Zhu Aiping said so, she was very happy.

"No matter. Hugging is normal, you are my wife, don't let me hug? " Zhao Xin said.

Zhu Aiping didn't speak, swallowed saliva, closed his eyes and quietly felt the warmth of Zhao Xin's arms.

At the same time, Jing He in the hospital has woken up. She cocked her head and looked out of the window. It's raining outside the window. The light rain hit the window and slipped down again, which reminded Jing He of Cheng Xiao. Disobedient tears slipped from the corner of her eyes. Jing He felt a little cold in her cheeks. She wiped away the tears with the back of her hand, remembering that Cheng Xiao had gently kissed the tears on her face with her lips on the day when she "broke up" with Cheng Xiao. His kiss is so gentle. Today's tears can only be wiped by yourself. At the most vulnerable time, there is no sweetheart around. I hold myself, stick it on his face, and gently call "baby". Thinking about thinking, Jing He burst into tears. She couldn't control it any longer and began to cry.

In the evening, Cheng Xiao woke up and ran out to buy some beer. Locked myself in my room, I don't know where to dig out a guitar. Sit against the wall and take it out of your pocket. I took out a cigarette and smoked it in my mouth. When Jing He left, his heart left with him. He has not smoked for more than 30 years, but he bought a pack of cigarettes. He put out his cigarette and played the guitar. Playing Fish Leong's "Breathing Pain", he sang: "Missing is the pain of breathing". Tears welled up in the eyes, and men don't flick when they have tears. Cheng Xiao hasn't cried since his tenth birthday. Why did he cry? Actually, think about it, Cheng Xiao shouldn't cry, because he went to the bar and hurt his dear person. The feeling of being stung by my heart really hurts.

It hurts too much elsewhere. You can take painkillers. However, what about the heart? What should heartache be repaired with? He put down the guitar, picked up the beer and looked up and took a long drink. Hands clenched into fists and punched on the wall. In fact, what he was really angry about was not all Jing He's departure, but that he was still angry with himself. If you keep your distance from his woman from the beginning, if you don't go to the bar. Maybe none of this would have happened ... he kept banging on the wall until he bled.

He doesn't understand why all men fall in love with the swing in TV dramas, while there is only one woman. TV dramas are all fake. It turns out that an extremely sad person has to vent forcibly.

At this time, my father's voice came from outside the door: "Cheng Xiao, don't you like my fried rice with shredded green peppers best?" Dad made a special one for you. Open the door. No matter how angry you are, you can't help eating. I'm not going in. I'll leave the meal at the door for you, and you can get it yourself. "

Cheng Xiao silently listen to don't talk, QuJinMing see Cheng Xiao silent, with a sigh, turned to leave. As my uncle, uncle and father, Qu has known each other for so many years, and I have never seen anything so sad. Seeing such Cheng Xiao, I can't help thinking of myself when I broke up with Yating, and I even thought about suicide in pain. He bought a bottle of sleeping pills and put them in the closet. It was not until you got married in Mei Sheng and had children of your own that she slowly put down her sleeping pills and quietly discarded them. He knew that he had to go through all this, whether Cheng Xiao and Jing He split or reconciled in the end, he had to go through all this. It is getting dark. Cheng Xiao didn't go to the hospital. He locked himself on the wall in the room. In the dark room, Cheng Xiao kept drinking bottle after bottle of wine. I don't know how long it took, but the bottle fell to the ground, and Cheng Xiao fell asleep in a daze with tears in his eyes. Cheng Xiao felt the existence of Jing He in his sleep. ...

Yes, Jing He is back. She gently pushed open the door, dressed in a long white dress, walked barefoot into Cheng Xiao's room and squatted down in front of Cheng Xiao. She gently wiped the tears from the corner of Cheng Xiao's eye with her right thumb, took Cheng Xiao's face with both hands and gently kissed Cheng Xiao's lips. How affectionate that kiss was. This kiss is full of thoughts. Jing He kissed Cheng Xiao heartily, and tears flowed freely, slipping from the corner of his eye to his cheek. This is the first time that Jing He kissed Cheng Xiao so madly, perhaps because she loved Cheng Xiao deeply. This may be the last time I kiss Cheng Xiao so affectionately, because they will be separated soon. Who said that husband and wife must be birds of a feather? If we are separated in the future, we may become the best friends of the opposite sex, and Cheng Xiao will be her best "brother". After a kiss, Jing He left. However ...? All this is a dream. A sad dream ...

The next morning, Mei Sheng came to Cheng Xiao's door with a glass of milk and knocked on Cheng Xiao's door. No one answered. You Mei Sheng shouted, "Cheng Xiao, Cheng Xiao, get up. Mother left the milk at the door. Remember to drink it. My father and I took our children to the hospital. " You Mei Sheng said, and turned to leave.

Just took two steps, Youshengmei felt that the situation was wrong and returned to the door of Cheng Xiao's room. I tried to open the door but it was locked. She shouted, "Qu, go find the key".

Qu quickly found a wire that was going to make roses for her children, and quickly stepped forward and said, "What's the matter? What are you looking for a key for?

"I think Cheng Xiao is wrong." Mei Sheng said.

Qu inserted the wire into the keyhole and the door opened. You Mei Sheng rushed in and smelled the wine in the room. He saw that the ground was full of wine bottles, scissors and gauze were thrown on the ground at will, and gauze was wrapped in his hands. You, Mei Sheng, are a little distressed by Cheng Xiao. He usually cherishes his hand, which is the hand of surgery. He doesn't often drink or smoke.

You shouted at Qu beside him, "Qu, what do you think? Cigarette butts, wine bottles, what does he want? What does he want? This is not enough to hurt light light blue. Now I hurt Jingjing, and I did it again. "

"Keep your voice down. I'll find Zhao Xin and help him to bed first. Come back at noon and say, you take the child to class first, and I will accompany him at home. " Qu said in a rare gentle tone.

"I'll go first." You Mei Sheng said.

Bend down and try to help him up. At this time, Zhao Xin happened to pass by the door of Cheng Xiao's house. He saw Qu rushed over to help Qu, and they put him to bed together. Zhao Xin squatted down again and began to tidy up the things on the ground.

After a while, Qu and Zhao Xin came out, and Qu gently closed the door.

"Uncle Qu, if you need me later, don't do it yourself." Zhao Xin said.

"When people are old, the waist will not work. I used to do surgery in bed. " Qu sighed. With a wry smile, he sighed and said, "Well, you go about your business. If you want to accompany the children to the hospital, my uncle also wants you to take care of Auntie You and Yingying, okay? Today, I stayed at home with Cheng Xiao and had a heart-to-heart talk with him. We didn't have a good talk.

"Ok, I have children there, don't worry." Zhao Xin said.

"Thank you! You and Ai Ping have worked hard these days. " Uncle Qu said politely.

"It's nothing to thank. We are all friends. This is a little help. Ai Ping from Jing He went to look for it. Don't worry about your health, you and your aunt will find it. " Zhao Xin said.

"Very good." Uncle Qu said.

"Well, I'm busy first. Remember to call me if there is anything at home. " Zhao Xin said. Said and turned to leave, QuJinMing sighed into Cheng Xiao's room.

At eleven o'clock in the morning, Cheng Xiao woke up.

"Wake up? Come, drink the porridge and cook it for you. " Dad said. Dad said, and took a small bowl of porridge from the bedside table and handed it to Cheng Xiao. Cheng Xiao picked up the bowl and gently took a sip. Dad looked at such a Cheng Xiao and said sadly, "Look at you, what have you become?"? I haven't eaten for days. In fact, dad knows how you feel now, and I know it's not your fault. Zhao Xin told us all the ins and outs, but Jingjing misunderstood. Cheng Xiao, if you let your parents know now, they will be distressed. "

Dad sighed and said, "Well, I know you don't want to talk now, so I'll go out first and you can rest." Say that finish, dad stood up and left.

Cheng Xiao suddenly said, "Dad, is she back?

Qu stopped, sat down with a sigh and said, "Not yet, I can't find it." .

Dad then smiled and said, "What? Miss her? Since you still love her and miss her, why didn't you get her back? " Cheng Xiao tight lips, silent. Qu sighed and walked away.

After Dad left, Cheng Xiao picked up his mobile phone, turned it on, opened WeChat and sent it to He Jing. He opened the chat record marked "Baby Wife", clicked on the dialog box, and carefully entered a sentence in Pinyin: I miss you. At that moment, I hesitated. He quickly deleted those words and re-entered a few words: Sorry! Then he added: Baby, can you forgive me? As before, he hesitated at the moment of sending. He deleted that sentence again and wrote: Where are you? Over and over again, back and forth, without saying a word. Cheng Xiao reasoned, sighed and put his phone under the pillow. A carp was fighting, so Cheng Xiao got out of bed and went to the desk to read and improve herself.

He opened the book, picked up the pen, turned on the computer, and everything was ready. But I can't calm down and sink down. The familiar nouns look so strange and difficult to understand today, and they are so boring. Cheng Xiao can't concentrate on his studies, his mind is full of Jing He. He turned off the computer and closed the book angrily. He hates, he hates himself. Why are you so hopeless? Can't get out of Jing He's shadow. He hates his feelings. He hates himself. Why is he unprepared for strange beautiful women? He lowered his head, rested his forehead on the table, closed his eyes and fell into darkness. Calm down, at this moment, Cheng Xiao's heart is calm. Calm as the sentence in Dingfengbo: No wind and rain, no sunny day. However, this calm is short-lived. After a while, he asked himself: Why not protect Jing He? Tears came out again, and he started drinking again.

At this moment, my father came in and said, "Cheng Xiao, have you ever heard a word?" It's even more worrying to drown your sorrows in wine. Stop drinking. Say what you say, a half-son-in-law. I watched you grow up, and you are like my son. So, dad wants you to tell me your pain, okay? "

It's no use. I want to be alone. "Leijiacha etc said.

Qu knows that without company, time will heal everything and wounds. Heart disease still needs a cardiologist. If there is something wrong with Cheng Xiao's heart, his prescription is time. Qu sighed and went downstairs. He sat on the sofa with his legs crossed, took off his glasses and rubbed his nose gently. After the fatigue was relieved, he put on his glasses again. Pick up the remote control from the coffee table and turn on the TV. The Japanese drama Obstetricians and Doctors is just playing on TV. He likes to immerse himself in TV plays. He felt cured by TV series. At least at this moment, he doesn't have to worry about the children's problems. Watching an obstetrician on TV is, after all, a TV series. Doctors are also unprofessional. Watching such an unprofessional and rigorous TV series. A sense of familiarity arises spontaneously. At the same time, I also turned on the computer and looked at "obstetrician Dr. Hong Bird". The scarred heart was repaired little by little by the scalpel in Dr. Hong Niao's hand. At the moment, I turned on the TV in my hospital bed in Jing He, Boston, just in time to watch Obstetricians and Gynecologists. Deeply immersed in the handsomeness of Dr. Hong Niao, she couldn't help falling in love with Dr. Hong Niao. The same TV series has quietly cured countless broken hearts.

After watching it for a while, Cheng Xiao started drinking again. At this moment, alcohol is the best anesthetic in Cheng Xiao. Alcohol is not the best sedative, nor is it an analgesic. But alcohol will paralyze you.

A trailer popped up in the computer, which was the new Great Pediatrician. One sentence touched Cheng Xiao: As a doctor, you must never drink, you need to stay awake at all times.

Yes, doctors can't drink. However, now he uses alcohol as an anesthetic to paralyze himself. Even became a "ventilator", supporting his life. He took a sip of wine, looked at his hand with a scalpel, and looked up to see a sentence on the screen: sometimes it is healing, often it is helping, always comforting. Yes, almost all doctors know this sentence. However, who can help him who hurts the most? Is it a psychiatrist? Or a dose of anesthetic? Or valium? No, no. None of this can stop his heart from hurting. An idea suddenly appeared in his mind: death.

He stood up and found the first aid kit and the scalpel. He closed his eyes and tried to end his life with this life-saving scalpel.

At this time, the door was knocked open. "You are crazy!" A voice came from behind. That man is Zhao Xin, who controls him from behind.

"You let me go, let me have an end. Jing He is gone, and I don't want to live! " Cheng Xiao said out of control.

Qu, who was holding a tranquilizer, hesitated.

"You let me go." Cheng Xiao tried to break free.

"Uncle Qu, hurry up, don't wait, give him some peace." Zhao Xin said.

Zhao Xin seems to see through Qu's hesitation, but Qu's half son. Qu hesitated, and finally he made up his mind. Qu gave a little stability with the needle and calmed down. Zhao Xin helped him to the bed, tucked himself in, and left with Qu.

After closing the door, Qu sighed and went downstairs and said, "It's no use. I almost took sleeping pills yesterday and almost cut my wrist today. Who knows what he will do tomorrow, drinking all day? What should I do? " Yingying is still recovering, Jingjing can't find it, and neither can Cheng Xiao. This is to crush me and your aunt. "Then there was a long sigh.

Zhao Xin comforted: "There are us, uncle. Don't worry, we'll find a way. Cheng Xiaochi will have an accident early, so there will be no physical and psychological problems. Besides, he already has the idea of suicide, and the consequences of staying at home are unimaginable. I must find a way to take Cheng Xiao out, go into nature and relax his body and mind. "

"You're absolutely right. I am afraid he won't. " Uncle Qu said with concern.

"Then I'll play with him first and have a good chat with him. Really can't. I will take him abroad or take him to the psychology department. " Zhao Xin said.

Qu Jinming shook his head and said, "We'll see, but you can think about it when you go to the psychology department."