Guo Degang's "I am a Scientist" cross talk script

Guo: Thank you. It’s quite late to see everyone persisting until now. It’s not easy. In fact, it’s all because of Teacher Yu. Everyone supports you so much, please support me

p>

Yu: Don't make such a fuss

Guo: Everyone has seen Zhu Bajie and this, aren't you looking at one person? Yu Qian

Yu: It’s me

Guo: A great person in my mind,

Yu: Alas

Guo: To tell the truth, Eat, pick up the wine glass, drink, Teacher Yu died at a young age

Yu: You talked me to death and co-authored

Guo: I have always been puzzled

Yu :Huh?

Guo, do you have such a high achievement? Is there any great master in your family?

Yu: Where? No

Guo :Huh?

Yu: Oh, the descendants of ordinary people

Guo: What?

Yu: The descendants of ordinary people

Guo : Hello, listen, he has an opinion on this

Yu: No

Guo: Huh?

Yu: No

Guo: You see, the general grew up in the grass without seeds

Yu: Ah?

Guo: Don’t think about his origin

Yu: Oh

Guo: What are the descendants of ordinary people afraid of?

Yu: No

Guo: I am an ordinary person. You see, everyone is an ordinary person

Yu: : I’ve never heard of it. What’s the point of taking advantage?

Guo: No, no, I don’t mean it.

Yu: Ah

Guo: Ordinary people too A great person can come out

Yu: That's right

Guo: Right?

Yu: Yes

Guo: You are one Example

Yu: You are a peanut, what are you doing with chestnuts?

Guo: Give me an example

Yu: Yes, OK

< p>Guo: You are an example

Yu: I am just one chestnut

Guo: I am another example

Yu: Two chestnuts?

Guo: Let me just talk about myself. Look at you, you are very accomplished, right?

Yu: A

Guo: You have become a, very good, actor, right?

Yu: Yeah

Guo: I am the same in my industry, and I have this outstanding performance,

Yu: Oh

Guo: I can do these things, I’m great anyway (shaking)

Yu: Why do you have lice? Is that you?

Guo: Free, natural, no airs,

Yu: Airs, why are you not from this industry?

Guo: I, hehehe. ． ． ． ． ． ． ．

Yu: Why are you so playful and smiling?

Guo: You said this child is ridiculous

Yu: What do you do?

Guo: Look, everyone else looks like a cross talk talker, professional characteristics

Yu: What?

Guo: Oh, you are so awesome

Yu: How can you be awesome?

Guo: Yes, yes

Yu: Cute

Guo: I made a small mistake

Yu: There is no such thing in this place< /p>

Guo: Yeah

Yu: Uh

Guo: Because I am a scientist (stretches out my arm)

Yu: You want to fly What's going on?

Guo: Where do you think I can reason from?

Yu: What do you, a scientist, do all the time?

Guo: Sorry

Yu: What are you embarrassed about?

Guo: I’m so embarrassed

Yu: You said you are a scientist, who can you deserve?

Guo: Everyone is worthy,

Yu: Yes, what do you do?

Guo: I didn’t pay for being a scientist

Yu: What is that?

Guo: Study (xiao) Xi

Yu: Study

Guo: You can also say it this way, you know? < /p>

Guo: Ah? Falling from the sky

Cake, rice, egg and tomato soup, shredded peppers and potatoes, and mouthwash with a toothpick in his mouth,

Yu: I want a real life

Guo: Not that

p>

Yu: Isn’t that right?

Guo: It all depends on learning

Yu: Yes

Guo: I fight children with geniuses

Yu: Oh

Guo: Entering preschool at the age of three

Yu: Ah?

Guo: Do ??you understand preschool?

Yu: The one before going to school

Guo: Yes! Yes, only smart children go there

Yu: Yes

Guo: As for me, I love preschool the most

Yu: Why?

Guo: Meat dumplings, millet porridge

Yu: Eat it?

Guo: After three days, I was persuaded to retreat and not allowed to go

Yu: Why?

Guo: Eat too much

Yu: Mainly rush to eat

Guo: This kid is going home hungry

Yu: Are they all for people to eat?

Guo: I can throw up a whole classroom

Yu: Get up

Guo: I don’t care about that, it’s like being self-taught

Yu: How did you learn?

Guo: I, I studied by myself, and after studying I went abroad

Yu: Just go abroad directly?

Guo: Hahahahahaha

Yu: What’s wrong, why do you always have this?

Guo: Going abroad! Go study abroad.

Hehehehehe

Yu: Where are you going?

Guo: Do ??you care?

Yu: I don’t know how to chat

Guo: No, you’re so embarrassed to ask this question

Yu: Aren’t you ashamed all the time? What?

Guo: I will go to the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, pill, king, hahaha

Yu: Didn’t hear clearly? Hey, where?

Guo: Why didn’t you hear clearly?

Yu: Say it again

Guo: Say it again

Yu: That’s right

Guo: Go abroad, hum

< p>Yu: Where?

Guo: It’s in Great Britain and Northern Ireland, um, and Morocco, right? The United States, and...

Yu: This time you are different from before, do it again

Guo: What? !

Yu: What else can I say

Guo: You, encourage me

Yu: Why should I encourage you?

Guo: It’s really encouraging. I am the one in Great Britain and Northern Ireland. There may not be Morocco, United States and North Korea, a democratic kingdom.

Yu: The names of the countries are all vague. Where is it?

Guo: You are so annoying, why don’t you go all the way south on the south coast of the Pacific?

Yu: Then go south?

Guo: Don’t go too far south. Further south is Gu’an

Yu: What about to the east?

Guo: Langfang

Yu: To the west?

Guo: Fangshan

Yu: To the north?

Guo: Yuquanying

Yu: This is your place

Guo: Yeah, big

Yu: Daxing!

Guo: Look at you, you are seeking death.

Yu: Why are you seeking death? Why is this all you want to do?

Guo: This guy doesn’t look human at all

Yu: Who doesn’t look human at all?

Guo: Not human at all (fanning)

Yu: Your fan is already cold

Guo: Here we go, here we go to the Academy of Sciences You were beaten to death, you know?

Yu: What is this place?

Guo: Why are you so disrespectful to our profession?

Yu: You said that place

Guo: When I came to our place, you said it was Daxing, Daxing District

Yu: Ah

Guo: I said Daxing County?

Yu: Yes

Guo: We are not, we are, take it over, do you understand this?

Yu: Tell me

Guo: I don’t know where Great Britain is from

Yu: You all have it

Guo: Mississippi, I, I, I, Saxon State

Yu: Saxon State?

Guo: Saskatchewan, Saskatchewan, people say Saskatchewan, Texas, abbreviated as, Braised Chicken is the best

Yu: No

Guo: Hua

Yu: You said this Texas is Shandong

Guo: I don’t care what you do, I don’t care what you do

Yu: You. ． ． ． ． ．

Guo: We live in Pangguazhou, where the watermelons are the sweetest

Yu: This is what you mentioned in Pangguazhuang

Guo: Pangguazhou

Yu: Where is Panguazhou?

Guo: Look carefully

Yu: Ah

(Many people below said "like")

Guo: Look Look at the two of you sitting there, you just look at the learned people and you hate them

Yu: What do I hate about the watermelon seller?

Guo: Hate it, I am, I am a returnee from overseas

(Many people below said "like")

Guo: What did our relatives say? ? You see

Yu: How is it?

Guo: Yes

Yu: Right

Guo: Ah

Yu: No Gaier

Guo: There is no difference between you and me who drink fresh water

Yu: Don’t say that, returnee

Guo: Well-educated, look, my classmates have just arrived

Yu: This is not related to learning

Guo: We are talking there, and we speak foreign languages

Yu: You?

Guo: You didn’t hear it

Want to speak a foreign language?

Yu: Tell me?

Guo: Do ??you see? A foreign language. Hello? May I help you? Yaoxi.

This Tashi Dere, Bagayalu, oh, very thank you

Yu: I was in chaos

Guo: I live in the United Nations guest house, in every country, I We all chatted with them

Yu: You are squatting there

Guo: Scholar, are you learning foreign languages?

Yu: Really or fake?

Guo: You can't learn this, your brain is half watery and half empty, and it's like paste

Yu: Why are you criticizing me?

Guo: Do ??you know? Me, after I finish my studies, I want to say it after I am released

Yu: Release?

Guo: After completing my studies, I will release it

Yu: Finished your studies? You were released after serving your sentence and were locked up, right?

Guo: Finished your studies, completed your studies, completed your studies

Yu: Finished your studies and graduated

< p>Guo: Xueman, yes, some are killed, some are released, we are not killed, none of us are killed,

Yu: Yes

Guo: They are all out , A. How many, how many countries are looking for me, they all keep me

Yu: Yes

Guo: Germany, Germany is looking for me

Yu: Who is looking for Germany? You?

Guo: Minister Sun of the German Space Ministry is looking for me

Yu: Is there a Minister Sun in Germany?

Guo: Minister Sun is looking for me, huh?

Yu: Oh

Guo: Stay, stay, you’re not doing anything, right? Wherever the loess doesn’t bury people, right? Do it here, stay here (Shandong accent) I "Don't do this, hurry up, you play go

Yu: play go?

Guo: play, play, Wan'er, Wan'er means, go means to go, play and go

Yu: Where do I need a translation when swearing?

Guo: You don't understand this

Yu: I don’t understand

Guo: Hey, play go, go, go, play, the Americans are here for me

Yu: Ah

< p>Guo: America, Secretary of the American Victory Electric Company, Liu Meili is looking for me

Yu: What's your name?

Guo: Sister Liu is looking for me, "Stay, stay." , where are you not doing? Where is the loess that doesn’t bury people?” “Go, go, hurry up, play go”

Yu: Let’s play again

Guo: Here we go again, from the Soviet Union, oh, the Soviet Union

Yu: Is the Soviet Union disintegrated?

Guo: Right?

Yu: It’s disintegrated

Guo: Me No matter where it is, I'll leave it alone

Yu: Ah,

Guo: Come to me, "Stay, stay, what are you doing?" Where is the loess that doesn’t bury people?” “Let’s go, go quickly, play go, quick play go,”

Yu: Quick, this sounds like something to laugh at, not like a foreigner< /p>

Guo: Hate it, under my justice the imperialists ran away with their tail between their legs, on crutches, a urinal, and a lunch box (singing) This shows that this scientist is patriotic

< p>Yu: You are so busy

Guo: I'm back

Yu: Oops

Guo: I'm so high-spirited that I can travel to Yangzhou in March

p>

Yu: Waist flowers?

Guo: Tao rice

Yu: What?

Guo: Tang poetry

< p>Yu: Waist flowers, fireworks

Guo: Yes, fireworks in Yangzhou in March, why are you so arrogant?

Yu: That’s called fireworks in Yangzhou< /p>

Guo: Ah, yes, fireworks come to Xiayaozhou in March

Yu: You can’t live without them, right?

Guo: Yangzhou, Xiayaozhou, yes?

Yu: That’s right

Guo: Oh, I was still a child when I left. I left around the same time as Xiaomi’erzhu, but now I’m mature when I come back

Yu: Yes

Guo: I am transgender now to train myself

Yu: Transgender without surgery?

Guo: Change my personality

p>

Yu: Make it clear

Guo: Change your character, I am for the motherland, let’s go anyway, let’s go

Yu: Why do you take this oath?

Guo: Work hard

Yu: Work hard

Guo: Study hard and make progress every day

Yu: Still studying?

< p>Guo: Nu

Power, hurry up and finish learning my "play go"

Yu: No one is stopping you

Guo: I am very busy every day

Yu: What are you busy with? ?

Guo: I study science in my office

Yu: You still have an office

Guo: Big office

Yu: : Wow

Guo: Wow, it’s a big office, it’s amazing

Yu: How big is it?

Guo: 40 square meters

Yu: You haven’t seen anything big before, so 40 square meters is a big office?

Guo: One room is 40 square meters

Yu: Oh, how many rooms?

Guo: Just one room

Yu: Is it still 40 square meters?

Guo: I fooled 400 people

Yu: What the hell does it matter? ah?

Guo: Change the light bulb, oh, change the light bulb

Yu: Change the light bulb

Guo: Did you see it? A large desk, two meters long and one meter wide

Yu: So big?

Guo: The bottom is black and the border is white. It turns out there was a net at that time and I took it down.

Yu: You use the table tennis case as your desk?

Guo: It’s a good style. You can just pick it off when you’re tired.

Yu: Just pick it up?

Guo: Anyway, I have pencils, ballpoint pens, pen sharpeners, draft paper, and I would like to return. They are all arranged. I am here, Mazar.

Yu: Mazar? Don’t sit on a chair

Guo: Here is my pen holder. There is a pen holder standing in the corner. It is a big pen holder over two meters high. Oh, I put the pen in it.

Yu: A big pen holder over two meters high. How do you get it?

Guo: Forgot, I brought a fortune teller

Yu: Big fortune teller

Guo: Alas, there is my big phone by the window. Table

Yu: Big telephone table

Guo: Put a phone on the table, and there is a hole in the table

Yu: Get a public phone

Guo: Here comes someone who studies science

Yu: Is it useful?

Guo: Contact me, I don’t talk to him, I ignore him

Yu: No money

Guo: There is a meter

Yu: Well, it’s still a public phone

Guo: I have my electric mattress table here

Yu: That’s called a bed, you know? Electric mattress table

Guo: Is it scientific research?

Yu: Are you going to study it on the bed?

Guo: Portraits of scientists hanging on the wall

Yu: A

Guo: Marx, Engels, Lenin, Li Shizhen, Harry Potter, there is an old man wearing glasses

Yu: This is?

Guo: That uncle from KFC

Yu: Whoever you catch will post it

Guo: Here is the periodic table of elements, aoeiuübpmfdtnl

Yu: This is called the periodic table of elements?

Guo: This is the eye chart, the eye chart, not that E, that E, there are A's there, you can't go wrong, this one, up, down, left or right.

Yu: So what do you care about?

Guo: It’s on the sticker on my eye

Yu: Is that how you see it?

Guo: Hey! Clean up the house and do scientific research

Yu: Oh

Guo: It’s getting warmer, let’s return the stove first

Yu: Where can I borrow the stove?

Guo: Isn’t it cold? It’s not worth buying a stove and resting it for nine months a year

Yu: Really good at math

Guo: No, just Three months, used up

Yu: Still

Guo: There is a question left over from history

Yu: What?

Guo: There’s a big hole in the glass

Yu: The one with the chimney

Guo: I’ll get a big telescope

Yu: Do it What?

Guo: Make sure I take a shower

Yu: You are so stubborn about this

Guo: Maintaining social security is the responsibility of every scientist Responsibilities you should do (raise your arms)

Yu: What kind of public order have you maintained?

Guo: This pair of extraordinary men are taking a shower

Yu: You can’t see this

Guo: I hate it, they’re not married yet?

Yu: What are you looking forward to?

Guo: Ah Xie will be there soon, um, Wan

Do you still have faith?

Yu: Don’t look forward to it

Guo: I started researching

Yu: Researching

Guo: Researching my scientific topic< /p>

Yu: What?

Guo: I bring benefits to the people

Yu: Oh

Guo: I bring benefits to the people

Yu: Where can you be like this? Talking about bringing benefits

Guo: Bringing benefits

Yu: How to bring benefits?

Guo: I’ll just do that and study Newton

Yu: Newton?

Guo: Newton, how is beef stewed

Yu: Let’s eat it

Guo: Do ??you know this is so mushy?

Yu: I have not forgotten the traditions of old age

Guo: I hate it, you are stuffing it and I am eating it in one piece

Yu: What? Newton is beef stew

Guo: Anyway, any kind of meat will do. I study civilian technology

Yu: What is it for civilian use?

Guo: It’s useless for you to study other things. Is it useful to study nuclear weapons?

Yu: It’s useless

Guo: People’s small nuclear weapons are so big (gesture)

Yu: So big?

Guo: Make a bunch of them, ah, connect them, pick them up, and they crackle

Yu: Is this called a nuclear weapon?

Guo: This, that’s boring

Yu: You study that

Guo: Study what the common people can use

Yu: What thing?

Guo: Research on things that are closest to people’s lives

Yu: Yeah

Guo: Research on plants A

Yu: What

Guo: Let’s study a dish

Yu: What else can be studied about dishes?

Guo: I make steamed buns and cabbage

Yu: cabbage?

Guo: one foot and four big cabbage

Yu: oh

p>

Guo: Spinach, spinach, twelve meters big spinach, at least half a ton each

Yu: Oh

Guo: Go home, take some cucumbers and eat them. Uh, let’s boil big eggplants and eat them, and stew shit radish for you to eat

Yu: This can’t be mentioned together, why is it so disgusting?

Guo: Shit radish, it’s red in the mountains What, just radish?

Yu: Other family’s big characters

Guo: My sister-in-law is afraid that you won’t eat enough

Yu: I won’t eat even one bite when I grow up

p>

Guo: Is it fun to display it?

Yu: What are you displaying?

Guo: Research high technology for civilian use

Yu: Also research

Guo: Benefit the common people (raising arms)

Yu: Don't< /p>

Guo: Huh?

Yu: OK

Guo: Yeah

Yu: Leave it here

Guo: Much better, study that, study That rainproof suit

Yu: A rainproof suit?

Guo: Nano material, how to make it next? It’s done, suit, I can wear it when it rains. I can wear a raincoat inside.

Yu: Nonsense , how about you just wear a raincoat?

Guo: Research on big-pointed leather shoes used by lesbians

Yu: Why use them?

Guo: Specialized in preventing perverts from wearing big-pointed leather shoes

p>

Yu: Pointed leather shoes

Guo: Drink, big pointed leather shoes. I have tried it, and it can nail a bird to a tree by lifting your feet up

Yu: Hidden weapon It’s useful

Guo: Hey, if a girl wears it, it will scare away all the gangsters

Yu: That’s true

Guo: I’ve tried it< /p>

Yu: How did you try it?

Guo: After getting dressed, I went downstairs. The big hotel glass at the door was broken.

Yu: Oops.

Guo: How many security guards came over, and they were all scared, "Sir, are you okay?" "It's okay," "Oh, it's okay, just pay for the glass."

Yu: Don’t you have to accompany someone else?

Guo: Civilian high-tech

Yu: How high-tech?

Guo: Benefit the people! (Extends arms)

Yu: Stop shouting, is there anything practical?

Guo: Youa, steamed buns device

Yu: Steamed buns device

Guo: Family

Housewife, how tired are you from steaming somewhere every day?

Yu: A

Guo: My fully automatic high-tech steamed bun steamer,

Yu: What does it look like?

Guo: Absolutely different

Yu: What?

Guo: There are two circles

Yu: Yeah

Guo: Take an iron rod and connect it with a seat on top and a handle on the head. , do you know? If you put a chain on it, you can run, you know

Yu: Isn’t this just a bicycle?

Guo: Yes,

Yu: What does this steamed bun have to do with?

Guo: Use this to buy steamed buns

Yu: I asked you to study this, what is this mess?

Guo: That’s it, you have to work hard

Yu: Work hard, you haven’t studied this.

Guo: Common people, for the benefit of the people, study every day, study this. , open the telescope, relax

Yu: Here we go again, do you use this as leisure?

Guo: I love cleanliness so much. I have no relatives to take a break and turn on the TV

Yu: Watch TV

Guo: Change the channel , tap tap tap tap tap tap

Yu: These are all clicked in, and the arms are broken off

Guo: Twenty-one inches, big black and white

< p>Yu: What era?

Guo: Huh?

Yu: Twenty-one inches in black and white?

Guo: Look at this antenna, oops? Um? Um? You see, I want to touch it to make it clear. When I let go, bang, eh? Do this with me, huh? I’ll buy a piece of glass and tie it up later

Yu: What do you mean?

Guo: To benefit, I will benefit the people! (Extend arms)

Yu: Don’t yell, if you have something to say, don’t put it in your mouth

Guo: I’m watching the news

Yu: Watch the news

Guo: The Japanese drink urine in order to live longer. What kind of folk custom is this? Ha, this is courage. This is a creative idea.

Yu: This is

Guo: If I do this, if I pee

Yu: How much does it cost

Guo: Let’s get some drinks, okay?

Yu: Selling urine

Guo: Making drinks

Yu: High technology, what kind of drink?

Guo: Making urine That drink

Yu: Where can I drink this?

Guo: Will you live longer? You

Yu: Pee?

Guo: Pee, how good is this? Purely natural, no preservatives, okay? How good is this? When some people get angry, it can be mixed with water

Yu: Oh, don’t, it’s too dirty

Guo: If the urine is yellow, let’s call it lemon

< p>Yu: You can't get any other colors

Guo: It's okay, but this water is white

Yu: White

Guo : If you don’t have any taste, who will buy it?

Yu: What’s going on?

Guo: looking for diabetes

To: diabetics

Guo: My uncle has diabetes. He cried and went to the hospital for more than 4,000 yuan

Yu: Drink! I'm going to die

Guo: Pee in the sun, put a stick on it and pick up a big lollipop

Yu: It's too dirty

Guo: Apple, Apple flavor,

Yu: Oops

Guo: I’m going to find him with a pot, hey, you’re troubled, bring me a pot and do scientific research

Yu: What kind of scientific research?

Guo: After peeing, I went back and opened it

Yu: Hey

Guo: Put it in a bottle

Yu: Uh

Guo: Pick up a pipe and put it there, click, click, click, click

Yu: What are you doing?

Guo: Cheer up. Soda?

Yu: Is this the reason?

Guo: Close the lid and put it in the refrigerator, waiting for it to cool down. Son, get a telescope and take a look at the bather

Yu: I don’t have anything else to do

Guo: This person is gone. Where did he go?

Yu: Ah

Guo: I lost this person

Yu: I can’t find him

Guo: What should I do with my spare time? I've been waiting for an hour

Yu: A

Guo: Urine, it's cold, chaotic chaos chaos chaos chaos chaos chaos

Yu: It can be removed under the needle Mouth

>

Guo: Oops, drinking it makes my stomach hurt so much

Yu: Nonsense

Guo: It makes me hum

Yu: No way

Guo: Go to the toilet quickly

Yu: Come out, there is no toilet in your house?

Guo: Where is the toilet in the bungalow?

Yu: What kind of scientist?

Guo: Run, run, run to the public toilet, run to the toilet and rush in

Yu: Ah

Guo: Look at the toilet barrier He said to me, "Don't move, don't let me in, go, go outside." It made me crazy.

Yu: Pay the money

Guo: This is called bullying, and the scholar can be killed A scholar can be humiliated, but he needs to relieve himself now

Yu: That’s not what he said

Guo: There is a saying

Yu: That’s not what he said

Guo: If you don’t let me pull you down, this is all you have and wait for me

Yu: Yeah

Guo: Turn around and run

< p>Yu: Yeah

Guo: There is a toilet over there. Run forward. A group of children from the kindergarten on the side of the road are playing games there. Ah, why don't you sing "La la la, la la" and shut up. ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

Yu: You can’t force it

Guo: I’m so bad. Shut up and run forward. There is a restaurant in front of you. There must be a toilet in the restaurant

Yu: : There

Guo: Step up the steps and pull out the door

Yu: A

Guo: Stick a square square on the door puller and write a word My son "pull", I have never heard him say that before

Yu: Yes

Guo: I listened to him this time and put on my pants

Yu: A thousand miles away

Guo: The door opened and the waiter came over. "Sir, what do you want to eat?" "What do you want to eat here? Go home and change your pants."

Yu: : Go quickly

Guo: Turn around and come out without going home

Yu: Ah?

Guo: I’ll go to the public toilet first and fight with the janitor

Yu: Settle the score

Guo: I wouldn’t be so embarrassed without him What?

Yu: Beat people

Guo: Why don’t you let me in? !

Yu: A

Guo: If you don’t let me in, I’ll get some pants now, and he’s having fun with me, “You deserve it, this is called retribution”

Yu :What's wrong?

Guo: Who asked you to watch me take a shower?