Humorous classical Chinese

1. Humor is the main expression of the art of people laughing in classical Chinese short stories.

The essence of humor is funny, ridiculous and meaningful. Humor is the crystallization of human wisdom and an advanced emotional activity and aesthetic activity. Any plain and mediocre value orientation and stereotyped way of thinking have nothing to do with humor.

In real life, we can often see that the arguments between the two sides are fierce, tense and deadlocked, often because one or two humorous words from a third party can make both sides laugh, put down their words and make up. In lifeless and monotonous situations, people will laugh and laugh because of someone's humor, break this silence, activate people's tired and numb nerves, and thus create a vivid, healthy and interesting atmosphere.

Therefore, in a sense, humor is a mediator to solve human contradictions, a stimulant to enliven and enrich human life, an elegant spiritual activity and a beautiful behavior. The 68 humorous stories selected here reflect the social life and human feelings in ancient China, especially since the Middle Ages.

These jokes are illusory, real, revealing, critical, beautiful, ironic, ironic, explanatory and colorful, which bring people into an ancient and realistic fascinating world and thus obtain the greatest spiritual and emotional satisfaction. A meat thief went to Beijing to sell meat, stopped to urinate in front of a toilet on the side of the road and hung the meat outside.

Seeing this, the second man stole the meat. Before he went far, A came out of the toilet, grabbed B and asked B if he had seen anyone take his meat from the toilet.

B was afraid that A would see through, so he put the meat in his mouth early and said impatiently, "You are such an idiot! How to hang the meat outside the door without losing it? If you put meat in your mouth like me, is there any reason to lose it? " -Han Weiyuchun's "Laughing Forest" name game Xu Zhicai, the king of Xiyang in the Northern Qi Dynasty, is very eloquent, especially good at word games. When he is not the king, he tries to play with the king, a senior minister.

Wang laughed at the name and said, "Your name is Zhicai. What's the point? In my opinion, it is similar to call it' lack of talent'. " Hearing this, he immediately laughed at Wang's surname: "The word Wang is added to the left of the word, 呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄2157

Wang was tongue-tied and embarrassed. On another occasion, Xu Zhicai entertained guests, and Lu Yuanming was present.

During the dinner, Lu Yuanming made fun of his surname and said, "The word' Xu' means not entering the people (Wei added' Yu' and' Jin')." Immediately mocked Yuan Ming's surname-the word "Lu": "The word" Lu "means" An "printed a public character as" Lu ",and then matched it with a horse to make a donkey. "

Lu Yuanming was flushed and speechless, and the room was full of laughter. -Old title Sui Houbai's "Qi Yan Lu" Bird's Nest and Calf Hou Bai later became an official in the Tang Dynasty and often worked with people in solve riddles on the lanterns. Hou Baixian made three chapters for everyone: "What you guess must be a visible object; Second, you can't make empty explanations to confuse everyone; Third, if the explanation is finished, but you can't see this thing, you should be punished. "

Then he first made a riddle: "The back is as big as a house, the abdomen is as big as a pillow (the crossbar behind the car), and the mouth is as big as a cup." Everyone guessed for a long time, but no one guessed right. They all said, "Where is an object with a mouth as big as a cup and a back as big as a room?" There is no such thing. You must make a bet with all of us. "

Hou Bai finished gambling with everyone and explained, "This is the swallow's nest." They burst out laughing.

On another occasion, Hou Bai attended a large banquet. During the dinner, everyone asked him to make a riddle for entertainment.

What you guess can neither be strange nor difficult to understand, nor can it be abstract and untrue. Hou Bai replied, "There is something as big as a dog and looks like an ox.

What is this? "People are competing to guess, some people say it's a roe deer, others say it's a deer, but they all deny it. Let Hou Bai tell the answer.

Hou Bai laughed and said, "This is a calf." -The old title "Qi" by Sui Houbai asks for the name of Tianbao. In his early years, the famous secret supervisor He wrote to the court and wanted to retire to his hometown of Wuzhong.

Xuanzong Li Longji respected him very much and treated everything differently. When He Zhangzhi left, he said goodbye to Tang Xuanzong, and his eyes were full of tears.

Tang Xuanzong asked him what other requirements he had. Zhang Zhi said: "I know that Zhang Zhang has a son who hasn't been named yet. If your majesty gives it a name, I will be honored to return to China. "

Xuanzong said: "Faith is the core of Tao. Blessed people have faith. The son of Qing should be named Fu. "

Know the chapter and thank humbly. It took me a long time to realize. I thought to myself, "The emperor is so happy with me.

I'm from Wu, and the word' fu' is the word' claw' followed by the word' zi'. He named my son Fu, didn't he call my son's paw? -Gao Songyi's "Living in Groups" does not know what poetry is. Ai Zi likes to write poems.

One day, Ai Zi swam between Qi and Wei and stayed in a hotel. In the evening, he heard someone talking next door: "A song."

After a while, he said, "One more song." Ai Zi was baffled and sleepy all night.

Lying until dawn, * * * heard the man in the next room say about six or seven times, that is, six or seven songs. Ai Zi thought that the man in the next room must be a poet. He was quietly absorbed in poetry at the foot of the mountain, and he felt respect in his heart. He also liked this man's quick thinking and decided to get to know him.

Early in the morning, Ai Zi got dressed and got up, adjusted her crown belt and stood at the door to meet her. Soon, a peddler-like man came out of the next room, thin and ill.

Ai Zi was disappointed, thinking: With this respect, you look like a poet. Perhaps, people can't judge people by their appearances, and they can't guess blindly. He went up to him and asked, "I heard that Mr. Wang has many poems." Can I see them? "

The man said, "I'm a businessman and I never know what poetry is." Has refused to come up with poetry.

Ai Zi stubbornly said, "I heard you say' one' in the house last night, and then you said' one'. Isn't that a poem? " Hearing this, the man couldn't help laughing: "You misunderstood. Last night, my stomach was upset. Every time I have diarrhea, I can't find toilet paper at night, so I wipe it with my hands.

Diarrhea lasted all night, and my hands were dyed almost six or seven times. When I say' hand', I don't mean the first poem. "

Ai zi, listen.

2. Humorous and short classical Chinese, Ji Chang learned to shoot flies and was a good shooter in ancient times. He pulled the bow and the beast fell under the bird.

Disciple Wei Fei learned to shoot flies, but he was more skilled than his teacher. Ji Changzhe also learned to shoot at Wei Fei.

Wei Fei said: "I can't learn it instantly before I can shoot." Ji Changgui, lying under his wife's machine, took the lead with his eyes.

Two years later, although the cone tail fell off, it was not instantaneous. Tell Wei Fei.

Wei Fei said. "Not also, will learn to watch before.

See the big from the small, see the small from the small, and then tell me. "I often hang my hair on lice in Xi 'an, looking at the south.

Between ten days, the sense of immersion is also great; Three years later, it's like a wheel. If you want to see the rest, you can see the hills and mountains.

It is the arc of the swallow's horn, which was shot by Shuo Peng's pole, penetrated the heart of the louse and hung on it. Tell Wei Fei.

Wei Fei danced and said, "You made it!" Translated as follows, for reference only: Gan Fei is an ancient archer. Before the bow was fully opened, the birds and animals fell down.

Disciple Wei Fei learned archery from Gan Fei and surpassed his master. Ji Chang learned archery from Wei Fei again.

Wei Fei said, "You have to learn not to blink before you can talk about archery." Ji Chang returned home, lying on his back under his wife's loom, staring at the shuttle (practicing not blinking).

Two years later, he didn't blink even if he used a cone spike (Jichang's) eyelid. (He told Wei Fei about it), Wei Fei said, "Kung Fu isn't home yet, but you have to learn to look at things-make the small big, make the small obvious, and then tell me."

Ji Chang hung on the window with yak hair tied with lice and came from the south to practice. Ten days later, the lice in Jichang's eyes gradually became bigger; After three years, I feel as big as a wheel.

Looking around, everything is as big as a hill. So he used a bow decorated with the horn of Yan State, and an arrow made in the North Pole shot at the louse, penetrating the center of the louse, but the hair tied to the louse was not broken.

Tell Wei Fei (about it). Wei Fei jumped up happily, patted his chest and said, "You have mastered the skill."

The humorous classical Chinese tells a new story. Xie Taifu is as cold as ice, telling the child the meaning of the paper.

Suddenly it began to snow, and Gong said cheerfully, "What is snow like?" ? "Brother Hu said," Sprinkling salt in the air can be simulated. Brother and daughter said that if catkins were not due to the wind.

"Laugh loudly. Compare the catkins in spring to the snow in winter ... If you are a girl, you have to take a nap today. If you don't leave me, fuck you, you will have no less than two or three sentences.

Anger also, people who take a nap, not only me, but also the focus. What's more, I haven't lost my mind, and I am very wronged. What can you do? If you really have the ability, why are more than half of the students lying on the chopping board? Six out of ten people hate you. Are you okay? Its number can be seen.

Let bygones be bygones, but today's events are hateful and make me angry. Mother is sincere, and mother is not happy.

A meat thief went to Beijing to sell meat, stopped to urinate in front of a toilet on the side of the road and hung the meat outside. Seeing this, the second man stole the meat.

Before he went far, A came out of the toilet, grabbed B and asked B if he had seen anyone take his meat from the toilet. B was afraid that A would see through, so he put the meat in his mouth early and said impatiently, "You are such an idiot! How to hang the meat outside the door without losing it? If you put meat in your mouth like me, is there any reason to lose it? " -Han Weiyuchun's "Laughing Forest" name game Xu Zhicai, the king of Xiyang in the Northern Qi Dynasty, is very eloquent, especially good at word games.

When he is not the king, he tries to play with the king, a senior minister. Wang laughed at the name and said, "Your name is Zhicai. What's the point? In my opinion, it is similar to call it' lack of talent'. "

Hearing this, he immediately laughed at Wang's surname: "The word Wang is added to the left of the word, 呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄2157

On another occasion, Xu Zhicai entertained guests, and Lu Yuanming was present. During the dinner, Lu Yuanming made fun of his surname and said, "The word' Xu' means not entering the people (Wei added' Yu' and' Jin')."

He immediately mocked Yuan Ming's surname-the word "Lu": "The word" Lu "means that" An "prints a public character as" Lu ",and then matches it with a horse as a donkey." Lu Yuanming was flushed and speechless, and the people in the room laughed their heads off.

-Old title Sui Hou Bai's "Qi Yan Lu" Bird's Nest and calf Hou Bai later became an official of the Tang Dynasty, often with solve riddles on the lanterns. Hou Baixian made three chapters for everyone: "What you guess must be a visible object; Second, you can't make empty explanations to confuse everyone; Third, if the explanation is finished, but you can't see this thing, you should be punished. " Then he first made a riddle: "The back is as big as a house, the abdomen is as big as a pillow (the crossbar behind the car), and the mouth is as big as a cup."

Everyone guessed for a long time, but no one guessed right. They all said, "Where is an object with a mouth as big as a cup and a back as big as a room?" There is no such thing. You must make a bet with all of us. Hou Bai finished gambling with everyone and explained, "This is a swallow's nest. "

They burst out laughing. On another occasion, Hou Bai attended a large banquet.

During the dinner, everyone asked him to make a riddle for entertainment. What you guess can neither be strange nor difficult to understand, nor can it be abstract and untrue.

Hou Bai replied, "There is something as big as a dog and looks like an ox. What is this? " Everyone has been speculating, some say it's roe deer, others say it's deer, but they are all denied.

Let Hou Bai tell the answer. Hou Bai laughed and said, "This is a calf."

-The old title "Qi" by Sui Houbai asks for the name of Tianbao. In his early years, the famous secret supervisor He wrote to the court and wanted to retire to his hometown of Wuzhong. Xuanzong Li Longji respected him very much and treated everything differently.

When He Zhangzhi left, he said goodbye to Tang Xuanzong, and his eyes were full of tears. Tang Xuanzong asked him what other requirements he had.

Zhang Zhi said: "I know that Zhang Zhang has a son who hasn't been named yet. If your majesty gives it a name, I will be honored to return to China. " Xuanzong said: "Faith is the core of Tao. Blessed people have faith.

Qing's son should be called Fu. "Know chapter thank humbly.

It took me a long time to realize. I thought to myself, "The emperor is so happy with me. I'm from Wu, and the word' fu' is the word' claw' followed by the word' zi'.

He named my son Fu, didn't he call my son's paw? -Gao Songyi's "Living in Groups" does not know what poetry is. Ai Zi likes to write poems. One day, Ai Zi swam between Qi and Wei and stayed in a hotel.

In the evening, he heard someone talking next door: "A song." After a while, he said, "One more song."

Ai Zi was baffled and sleepy all night. Lying until dawn, * * * heard the man in the next room say about six or seven times, that is, six or seven songs.

Ai Zi thought that the man in the next room must be a poet. He was quietly absorbed in poetry at the foot of the mountain, and he felt respect in his heart. He also liked this man's quick thinking and decided to get to know him. Early in the morning, Ai Zi got dressed and got up, adjusted her crown belt and stood at the door to meet her.

Soon, a peddler-like man came out of the next room, thin and ill. Ai Zi was disappointed, thinking: With this respect, you look like a poet. Perhaps, people can't judge people by their appearances, and they can't guess blindly.

He went up to him and asked, "I heard that Mr. Wang has many poems." Can I see them? " The man said, "I'm a businessman and I never know what poetry is."

Has refused to come up with poetry. Ai Zi stubbornly said, "I heard you say' one' in the house last night, and then you said' one'. Isn't that a poem? " Hearing this, the man couldn't help laughing: "You misunderstood.

Last night, my stomach was upset. Every time I have diarrhea, I can't find toilet paper at night, so I wipe it with my hands. Diarrhea lasted all night, and my hands were dyed almost six or seven times.

When I say' hand', I don't mean the first poem. "Ziyi listened, ashamed.

-The Word Game of Lao Shi's Essays on Ai Zi Su Dongpo heard that Wang's Essays on Words had just been written, so he went to the office to congratulate him and joked: "In the masterpiece, it is said that' bamboo' whips and' horses' are' Benedict'. But I still have a question: "I don't know what's so funny about whipping dogs with bamboo?" Gong Jing just laughed and asked, "Is there any evidence that the word' pigeon' is changed from' bird' to' nine'? Dongpo immediately replied, "The Book of Songs says,' The dead pigeon is in mulberry, and his son is seven'. Together with their parents, it is exactly nine. "

4. Classical Chinese funny sentences 1. Haha, Mulan flies a plane. What plane does she fly? Boeing 747.2. He resigned from Beijing last year and lived in secluded Tokyo, where there was no music and he had never heard of Sima Guang in his life.

3. Money is what I want; Beauty is what I want. You can't have your cake and eat it, and those who give up money for beauty are also.

I don't leave my grandfather here, I have my own place to leave my grandfather, and I don't leave my grandfather anywhere. I will go to the railway. I was sick when I was a child, not when I was nine.

Alone, as for the establishment of a new China. There are no handsome guys, and finally there are beautiful women.

The door is weak and thin, and there is a rest at night. Liu Suying's illness is often in the sky.

Chen Shi urine soup, never expired. 7. Be soft when you catch the sacred dynasty; Li Kui JY, the former satrap, loved Fang La more.

From the Secretariat in Leslie Cheung, a courtier and a slave. 8. The imperial edict is strict, and I am in charge of Altman.

The whole universe forced me to hang myself. I must obey.

9. I can live for a hundred years without my grandmother; Grandma can live for a thousand years without a minister. Mother and son can't compare with turtles.

10. Chen Mi has two out of twenty this year, and Grandma has nine out of ninety this year. Please forgive my affair.

5. Humorous and short classical Chinese can boast.

original text

When a person gets lost and meets a mute, he doesn't answer questions, but only gives directions by making money gestures with his hands as a sign of getting money. This person is metaphorical, that is, he uses it to count money. The dumb man opened his mouth to show the way, and the man asked, "Why don't you have the money to pretend to be dumb?" Dumb: "In today's world, talk if you have money!" "

translate

A man lost his way and met a "mute" who asked and didn't answer. The "dumb" will only ask for money with his hand, and then he will show the way. The lost man understood the meaning and immediately took out a few dollars and gave it to the "dumb". "Dumb" then asked for directions, and the lost man asked, "Why pretend to be dumb?" "Dumb" said: "In today's world, you can talk if you have money."

Excerpted from Laughing at Guang Lin Collection, Laughing at Guang Lin Collection was collected by the owners of the famous brand games in Qing Dynasty, mostly from jokes in Ming and Qing Dynasties.

6. How to write "1" describing humor in classical Chinese?

Example: The Sixteenth Session of The Present Situation of Wonders Witnessed in Twenty Years: "I said,' Are these two sentences witty? "The following way:' Is it a joke? I think it's just frivolous. " 」

2. Turn off the wind.

Example: A Reunion of Feng Yumei, a popular novel in Beijing and China: "Words must be wide and far away, words must be close and the wind will move. 」

Step 3 stir-fry with strong fire

For example, the Song Dynasty's Song Dynasty's "Send a Minister to Jiangxi" says: "The feather hairpin dances back to the snow, and the sword talks about Confucianism. 」

4. Machine interest j and q and

Example: Chen Ming Ruyuan's Biography of Jin Ping Mei: "The business in Tai Chi painting is good, and kites and fishing machines are full of interest, which stems from the worship of Mount Tai. 」

5. Humorous nonsense

For example: Hanshu? Biography of Dong Fangshuo: "His ci is good at Shang Yang and Han Fei, which means debauchery and is quite humorous. 」

6. Sorry

Example: Chapter 7 of Lu Xun's A Brief History of Chinese Novels: "Hou Bai" is a good way of humorous speech, and many people like it very much. 」

7. humorous

For example, Chen Ming Zilong's poem "A Birthday Gift for the Wujiang Cup in Tang Dynasty" says: "Sincere but boring, slow description of Xie Chongying. 」

7. Funny ancient prose is speechless, and the bar lights are like hemp. Lonely people spill hops in the middle of the night and are still drunk. Don't be the smell of wine in their hearts. 1 _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ Student A: There is a clear spring in my heart (the positive solution is "only flowing water comes from the source", so we still insist on water ~ ~) 3. Why * * * cut the candle at the west window, _ _ _ _ _ Student A: The husband and wife sit in the morning (the Chinese teacher laughs when marking the paper.

After class, I fainted again! The correct solution is "late rain time". Mayfly shook the tree, and _ _ _ _ _ replied: I didn't move at all (the correct answer is "ridiculous". Quietly, wonderful, very in line with the facts. 5. The beauty of a gentleman as an adult, _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ Also: both husband and wife go home (the correct answer is "but I feel the harmonious heartbeat of the sacred unicorn") 10. Sunrise in the east and rain in the west, _ _ _ _ _ _ Student A: Fighting at the end of the bed, getting married in the wrong sedan chair 1658.

The positive solution is "* * * Chanjuan thousands of miles away") 13. Egrets fly in front of Mount Cisse, and _ _ _ _ _ _ Students answer: Climb the turtle by the river in Dongcun (right) 14. I advise God to be energetic, _ _ _ _ _ _. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ Student A: Show your magic at the critical moment. Another student A: The mouse's son can make holes (the Chinese teacher in the whole office laughs wildly without images). 16. If it is sentimental, it will be old. _ _ _ _ _ _ Student A: People don't waste their youth! (The positive solution is "If the moon is long and round, I don't hate it", and Li He's "Golden and Copper Immortal Ci Han Song") 17. If relatives and friends in Luoyang ask each other, _ _ _ _ _ _ students answer: Please don't tell him (the correct answer is "a piece of ice heart is in the jade pot") 18. There will be couplets in the final exam. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ Student A: You are a fool if you don't eat. No one has died since ancient times. _ _ _ _ _ _ Student A: Only 20 people died. The bright line at the foot of my bed, _ _ _ _ _ Student A: Li Bai's sleeping sound is 2 1. The correct answer is "visible") 22. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ The classmate replied: Wife, my wife and a man's wife (the teacher later said that the classmate was particularly dedicated, haha) 27. Think that year, Jin Ge iron horse, students answer _ _ _ _ _ _ _. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ "Student A: It tastes the same (the invigilator and the headmaster outside laughed). Senior one students in pairs, "Going to town to hug the mountain in the white clouds, _ _ _ _ _ _" Student A: I went to the hotel to hug the young lady to bed (his Chinese teacher almost vomited blood on the spot) 30. Two feelings. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ Student A: When they got married, it was 3 1. Qian Fan is on the side of the sunken ship. _ _ _ _ _ Student A: There are many kinds of flowers to be proud of. 32. You hate books when you use them. _ _ _ _ _ _ Student A: There is not enough money by the end of the month. ) 35. I once tested Li Qingzhao's dream, "Do you know? Do you know that?/You know what? _ _ _ _ _ _ _ "The classmate replied: Sorry, I don't know.

The correct solution is "green manure and red thinness") 36. Once I tested a sentence from Mr. Lu Xun: "_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ If you don't leave, I will always feel good when I leave. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

There is another sentence, the last sentence: "Clear water produces hibiscus, (positive solution) natural carving." Some people write that mud gives birth to lotus roots; Some people are even more unique, and it says: Heroes in Gone with the Times 40. Ask how much you can worry about. _ _ _ _ _ _ Student replied: It's like a pot of Erguotou (the teacher criticized "You drank too much again ...").

8. Who can give me some funny ancient prose * Bernard Shaw liked riding a bike when he was young. Once he broke his leg bone, and his female classmates took good care of him. Bernard Shaw is worried that he will not be firm and will propose to this female classmate. He decided to slip away. But he accidentally fell down the stairs and both his legs were broken. As a result, he really asked her if she would marry him. Bernard Shaw fainted when the female classmate nodded. A lady said to Mao Mu: I've been with a man for a long time, but I'm not sure if I'm in love with him. This famous writer has a very unique view on the test of love. He said: there is only one way to test whether you really love him. Would you like to brush your teeth with his toothbrush? Someone asked Dumas: Why can you stride into old age with great composure? He retorted disapprovingly: It took me all my life to live today. When a famous figure in the Tang Dynasty was not an official, he once became seriously ill and said to his wife Lu: If I die of illness, don't be widowed and remarry. Lu went into the room and gouged out an eye to show that she would never change her mind. Later, Fang recovered from illness and rose to the high position of prime minister. She always respected her wife. Detective novelists say: archaeologists are ideal husbands. You see, the older things get, the more he likes them. Voltaire visited Britain on 1727, and he found that the British hated the French very much. A group of Englishmen shouted at him: Kill him and hang the Frenchman! Voltaire said: English! You want to kill me because I'm French. Isn't it hard enough to be punished because I'm not English? The Englishman smiled and sent him all the way back to the apartment.

9. Ask for a funny version of classical Chinese. Mulan flies a plane. What kind of plane does she fly? Boeing 747! Ask the woman what she thinks and what she remembers. She wants to, and she has no money to buy a plane. Last night, she saw a military poster and needed bombers and 12 planes, but she couldn't afford one. Grandpa didn't have much money, Mulan didn't have gold and silver, so she was willing to buy steel planes from now on. She buys drawings in the east, screws in the west, glass in the south and tin in the north. She refused to go to the old hangar, no but I heard the general shout hahaha. Wan Li flew the plane, but never closed the mountain for a moment. The hot air spreads on the wings and the sun shines on the glass. The general is scared to death, and the soul of a strong man has flown. The son of heaven is lying in a hospital bed. The director turned twelve times and gave them a slap in the face. Khan asked him what he wanted, but Mulan didn't want to go into the cell. I want to drive 747 and fly back to my hometown. My parents heard the girl's voice and picked up the machine gun. As soon as Sister A heard that Sister Mei was coming, she raised her hand and raised her gun. I heard that my sister came, and my brother sharpened his knife and turned mentally retarded. I opened my cabin door, entered my plane cabin, took off my wartime robe, put on my flight suit, put on more grenades, and planted machine guns outside. When they went out to bury the bomb, their relatives and friends were surprised and busy: twelve years apart, I didn't know Mulan was going crazy. The madman stepped on the ground, the idiot's eyes were closed, and the two walked side by side. Who can say I'm not normal? Haha, I want to eat KFC.

I don't smell saliva, but I smell a woman's sigh. Ask a woman what she thinks and what she remembers.

Women think of hamburgers, but women remember chicken wings. I saw the chicken coupon last night, and there was a big sale on the festival day.

Twelve chicken coupons and a chicken wing. Grandpa has no eldest son and Mulan has no big brother. She is willing to go to KFC to feed him from now on.

Buy hamburgers in the East Store, drinks in the West Store, chicken wings in the South Store and French fries in the North Store. When I said goodbye to my parents, I was by the Yellow River at dusk. I didn't hear my parents calling for a female voice, but I heard the splash of hamburgers.

But when I left the Yellow River, I went to Montenegro at dusk. I didn't hear my parents calling for a female voice, but I heard the smell of chicken wings chirping. The more the Great Wall of Wan Li spans, the more Mount Everest flies.

Banks send gold coins and emperors send sweaters. Hens die every year, and Mulan returns in ten years.

Come back to see Confucius, and Confucius will sit in the sky. Twelve chicken coupons and a hundred baskets of chicken.

Confucius asked him what he wanted, but Mulan didn't want to be an angel. She is willing to drive 1000 miles to send her son home. When parents heard that their daughter was coming, they went out to help the general: a sister heard that her sister was coming and wanted to eat KFC; I heard that my sister is coming and is going to eat.

Open my Dongting pot, take my Xiting spoon, take off my wartime robe, put on my napkin, take chopsticks from the window and eat in front of the mirror. When I went out to meet the fire companions, I was surprised and busy: I had been wandering together for twelve years, but I didn't know Mulan was so greedy.

The male rabbit's mouth is three valves, and the female rabbit's eyes are blurred; There are two rabbits eating next to me. Can you tell if I am greedy? If you don't know, you won't know; It's enough to take the exam, but there is no problem; If you don't know in class, you will make a lot of styles; Self-study is the same as knowledge, you are all born; Born in China, died in China; It is possible for me to learn English. English is not qualified, which shows my character; If the math is unqualified, the teacher takes full responsibility; What should I do if the language is unqualified? Doing well in the exam depends entirely on isolation; If you don't do well in the exam, you don't know how to do it in isolation; Going back to school every day is even more scary, and the teacher talks about the wild. I listened like a sleepwalker, criticizing for no reason; Homework is like revenge, and doing wild things is like fishing for the head; Going back to school is left-handed, getting worse every day; Copy your homework, and none of the departments will hand it in; Go back to school and drink coke after school; When the bell rang, they flew away, and another day, the beautiful girl was getting on the plane; I can't smell the dial tone, only women sigh. Ask the woman what she thinks and what she remembers; Women have nothing to think about, and women have nothing to remember.

I was really shocked when I went online last night; Twelve letters from my sister were all invited to meet under the net. The beautiful girl is married and has taken someone else's surname; The purpose of surfing the Internet is to entertain ourselves and make new friends.

The eastern version is idle, and the western version writes autobiography; South to talk about heart songs, north to talk. Face up to the internet and connect at dusk; I didn't hear my husband call his wife, but I heard the insects keep barking.

Once you quit the chat room, you will stop chatting. I didn't smell insects, but I saw invitations flying all over the sky. Seeing her husband offline, her husband burst into tears; If you only care about Internet addiction, you are in debt.

Ask the woman where she wants to go and frankly worship her parents; Take a thousand miles to go to an appointment to tell your heart. Hearing the news of my daughter, I was anxious to hide everywhere. Sister-in-law heard that she was coming, and quickly locked the doors and windows; Hearing my sister coming, I climbed up the east wall in a panic.

Open my old door and move your arhat bed; Open my old cupboard and search your password box. When you count the money at the window, go to the airport immediately.

Seeing netizens thousands of miles away, their eyes sparkle; I've been online for a month, and I don't know what a beautiful girl looks like. Dinosaurs are shy, beautiful girls are proud, and they all chat online, so Ann can see what I am like.