17 Things You Do When You’re Drunk

Theoretically, more than 90% of people will be drunk once before the age of thirty. As for the appearance after drunkenness, it can be said that the variety is complete and varied, making people laugh

Today, let us take a look at the various appearances after drunkenness.

1: I want to count the stars

At the end of the year party at work, a colleague who is usually very calm drank so much that his eyes were bloodshot. Seeing that the situation was not good, the leader quickly asked me to send him home. But when I reached out to hail a taxi, my colleague refused to get in. Instead, he sat happily on the edge of the road. He raised his head and said majestically to the sky: "Who said there are countless stars in the sky? I will count them all tonight!"

2: Stop the police car

One time at dinner, a buddy was a little drunk, but he seemed sober, so everyone ignored him. When the dinner was over, these guys suddenly rushed to the middle of the road, reached out and stopped a 110 police car that was patrolling, then opened the door and shouted to the policeman sitting inside: I know your car is traveling one kilometer a mile, (Qingdao) (The taxi price is one yuan per kilometer) but you don’t need to write it in such big words for me to see, you think I am short-sighted

3: Business is really good

Go to the restaurant During the meal, a buddy went to the restroom in the middle of the meal. When he came back, he told us mysteriously: "The business of this hotel is so good that there are even two tables in the restroom!"

When everyone was wondering, A group of people rushed over, grabbed the guy and started beating him. Of course we stopped and asked them: He didn't provoke you, why did you beat him?

"Why beat him? We had a good meal, but this guy ran into our private room, peed and left."

4: The car leaked oil< /p>

There is a relatively cool buddy. Once he wore leather pants and rode a motorcycle to a dinner party. After a silly drink, everyone retreated. When they were breaking up on the side of the road, the two guys suddenly felt the urge to urinate, so they walked to a tree. He didn't unbutton his leather pants, but unbuttoned his belt. He was holding the belt in his hand, and he started to have fun facing the tree.

At the end, he was still holding his belt and shaking wildly.

Then he launched his motorcycle. Just when he was about to start, he noticed that the ground under his leather pants was actually wet. So, he asked us in a confused way: "Strange, why is my car leaking oil?"

5: Money Giveaway

When I was at the newspaper office, there was a Colleague, he has a very legendary hobby. When he gets high, he likes to give people money, one hundred per person, and give them taxis home. He will be aggressive with anyone who doesn't want him, and he won't beat them severely.

But on the second day, he ran to people one by one in aggrieved manner, showing a pitiful look: "Brother, give me back the money you gave you yesterday."

The funniest thing is that the same thing about giving money to people actually happened to him three times in a month.

6: Throwing the watch

My dad always likes to bet with others when he is drunk. Once he didn't come back late at night, so we went to various pubs to look for him. When we found him, he was shouting on the street that he wanted to compare the merits of watches with another person. At the end of the quarrel, the old man took off the Omega from his wrist and threw it across the street. Then he hurried over and picked it up and shouted excitedly: "Look, my watch is still running. You want to try it too?"

7: We are all at home

There is a flower bed in front of my house. One morning when I went out, I found a buddy sleeping in the flower bed, wearing only a pair of shorts.

And his shirt, trousers, and tie were all neatly folded and placed next to him, with his mobile phone on them, which was actually turned off. There are also leather shoes, which are also arranged neatly, with socks placed in the shoe holes.

It seems that this buddy has made this his home.

When I thought about it later, it was a good thing that these guys didn’t like sleeping naked, otherwise, it would have been even more fun to watch.

8: Climbing the stairs

Once, netizens came from Tianjin and claimed that they would pour us Shanghainese people under the table. Of course we were not convinced, so we took turns. Drinking from beer to red wine, from red wine to rice wine, from rice wine to white wine, the final result is: the man in Tianjin should have carried his wife with a broken toe upstairs, but he muddle-headedly carried my six-year-old daughter from the first floor I carried him to the seventh floor and then staggered back from the seventh floor to the first floor. My wife beat me so hard that my eyes turned black.

9: Encountered a robber

After drinking with a group of people, we made an appointment to go to a certain house. As we walked, one person got lost and the other one went to look for him.

Everyone went to XX’s house first and sat down. After a while, the lost man came. He proudly told everyone that he had met a robber and asked him to beat him and scare him with bricks. The robbers were beaten away. As soon as he finished speaking, the man who was looking for him arrived. The girl who said he was lost angrily hit him with a brick, which made him run away with his head in his arms.

10: Here I Come Again

Once, several friends made an appointment to drink at a hotel called Yutou King. One of them drank too much and insisted on arriving. He went to another hotel to meet another group of drinking friends, but everyone refused to let him go, so they had to let him go. But not long after, he suddenly appeared in front of us with a bright face, apologizing repeatedly: "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I just had a drink and I'm late." After saying that, he sat down and faced the waiter. He shouted: "Come on, let's get some food!"

Later we found out that after he left us, he quickly got into the taxi and shouted to the driver: "Open the way, go." Fish Head King!"

As a result, the driver took him for a walk on the street and then sent him back. When he came to us again, he could no longer identify who was who, so he was so sorry!

11: Crying and laughing

The winter before last, I met a girl. The temperament is so good. We both hang out together almost every day. In the evening, I would either go to a bar or a disco. One night, we came home drunk. She started making trouble when she got home. Cry, cry so hard. She hid in the bathroom alone and cried. I kicked the door open and pulled her out, but she got into the closet again and continued to cry.

After finally getting her to bed, she hugged me and cried again. This wasn't over yet. I saw the mobile phone in my hand and banged it. Hit the wall hard. I just watched the beautiful foldable phone split into two halves.

The next day, she woke up. Holding his head and looking at the cell phone broken into two parts on the ground, he ran downstairs angrily and picked up a brick. I looked at her inexplicably. I saw this lady pick up a brick and hit the phone hard. After breaking open the casing, she took out the parts inside. She looked at me with a smile and said, "Haha, these parts are worth 300 yuan. Sell them." Then I can collect money to buy a mobile phone! "

12: What a pity

One time, a related company invited our colleagues to drink. The place was a very high-end restaurant, abalone and bird's nest and so on. , ordered a lot. During the dinner, everyone toasted frequently, took turns in the melee, and I don’t know how many bottles of red wine I drank. I just remember that when we were leaving, one of my colleagues was vomiting downstairs in the hotel. While vomiting, he cried out regretfully: "My abalone." , my shark fin, what a pity."

13: From Nanjing to Zhenjiang

I know an older brother who is from Nanjing and loves drinking. At that time, he came and went on a small Mulan motorcycle. One night, he was drunk, but he still rode his motorcycle home. He couldn't see the road clearly at that time and could only walk along National Highway 312 in a daze. He couldn't remember how long he had been riding. When he regained consciousness, he suddenly looked up and saw a signboard in front of him that was "Zhenjiang Hotel".

He actually rode a Mulan motorcycle from Nanjing to Zhenjiang!

What’s even more cruel is that he rode Mulan back to Nanjing from Zhenjiang.

14: Endless friendship

A man who usually behaved very elegantly got drunk and went to a small tree to relax. When he was done, he wanted to leave, but he felt someone was holding him. Facing him, he turned around and declined, "No, no, it's too late. I should go back. See you later, sister."

He had no choice but to leave. The people waiting for him got impatient when they saw him working alone, and came over to persuade him, "Miss, please let go. We will come back later. There are plenty of opportunities."

Rejecting back and forth. More than an hour later, they discovered that he had actually tied the belt to the person and the tree, and had a close relationship with the tree for a while.

15: Admit your mistake

I My brother's employer gave him a year-end bonus, and he went to a restaurant with a few of his close colleagues to celebrate. After drinking and eating, my brother came out and used the car key to open the bicycle, but he couldn't open it no matter what.

My brother thought, maybe it’s because he drank too much and his hands were shaking, right? Anyway, I made a lot of money today, so I might as well take a taxi home. So he put the bicycle in the trunk of the taxi and took a taxi back home. After sobering up the next day, my brother came downstairs to take a look and found that it was broken! He had to take a taxi and take the bike back.

It turns out that what he pulled home at night was his colleague Xiao Li’s bicycle!

16: Home

One of my neighbors likes to drink and is often drunk. Once, he got into a taxi after being drunk. The driver drove slowly and waited for him to tell him where to go. But after waiting for a long time, there was no movement. When I looked back, I saw that he was taking off his clothes. The driver was startled and asked quickly: "Sir, what are you doing!"

He said: "I'm home, I want to take off my clothes and go to bed!"

The driver quickly told him: "This is my car, not your home."

He thought for a while and shouted loudly: "Quick, go back to where I got in the car!"

The driver asked why, and he said: "I thought I was home just now, so I took off my shoes at the door!"

17: Fortune telling

Once, a friend from out of town arrived When I was doing business in Qingdao, my friends went to a hotel to get together. It turned out that he was a little drunk. When he arrived at the hotel, he refused to take out the room key. We had no choice but to go to the hotel front desk to find another way.

When we returned to the door of the room with the waiter, we saw him neatly arranging the banknotes, credit cards, business cards and other things in his wallet one by one. On the ground. After seeing us, he said excitedly and joyfully: "Come on, come on, I'll give you a fortune!"