Performing a skit with three people, three men. Be funny, not too long, no big props

Performing a skit with three people, three men. It should be funny, not too long, and there should be no large props

Breaking cups is the number. Zhang Xiaoguang’s sketch does not need props. Be funny and not too long. A sketch or cross talk performed by three little girls. I remember one time, on the way home. , I have experienced countless temptations! A group of girls washing their hair at the hair salon waved to me, but I turned a blind eye; a group of girls doing pedicure and health care looked at me, but I was indifferent; a disciple of the Beggar Gang asked me for help, but I gave him a cold look! I sighed deeply at this world of feasting and entertainment: "How wonderful it would be to have money in my fucking pocket!" The five-person comedy sketch should not be too long but short and funny

During a Spring Festival Gala in the 1990s, Ma The cross talk "Five Senses Strive for Merit" performed by Ji and several of his apprentices is a classic. It happened to be performed by 5 people. Most young people nowadays have never seen it. You can watch the video first. It is very funny and ironic. The artistic conception expressed is also I’m very clear, don’t think it’s an old work. You’ve slightly adapted it and it will definitely work well, because the current work is also an adaptation of the past. Your performance will definitely make everyone’s eyes brighten. The five-person campus sketch in our freshman dormitory has to be performed as funny as possible. Don’t do it. Too Chang

Being poor and happy: When others are happy, I am really happy. When I am happy, I am really happy when I am poor and happy. No matter what happens, if you are happy in a happy teahouse, you will definitely be happy, don’t you think so! .

Audience: Yes.

2. Situational performance part

Poor and happy, holding a fake hundred-dollar bill in his hand, monologue: You said that people are unlucky, salt shakers make their mouths grow, drinking water stuffs their teeth, and farting hurts People, walking with twisted legs, when did you get a piece of counterfeit money mixed in? Dongdong (100).

Qiongxin slapped his face with the palm of his hand and cursed: "You have a pair of goldfish and leopard eyes open for nothing."

Qiongxin showed a sly smile: The Tao is as high as the devil, and there is a way.

Entering Lao Kaixin, Lao Kaixin stood at the service desk and greeted Qiong Kaixin with a smile, while Qiu Kaixin sat on the tea table with his legs crossed.

Old Happy: My little sister is serving tea.

Poor and happy: the best Biluochun, plus a plate of pistachios.

Little Happy is holding tea: Boss, Happy Teahouse, drink Biluochun, chew pistachios, be happy, be happy today, be happy tomorrow, be happy every day, be happy every month, be happy every year, eat happily, drink happily, sleep happily Have fun, be happy in everything and always be happy.

Poor happy hand touched little happy hand: happy! happy! It’s even more fun to have my little sister (secret) drinking with me.

Xiao Xingxin left in anger: "I molested my aunt, I'll blow your head off."

Qiongxin stepped forward and poured tea for Qiongxin: Boss, I will accompany you.

Poor and Happy: With you, bark face, withered grass head, grasshopper waist, fiddle belly, iron pickpocket, and happy teahouse, disgusting.

Lao Kaixin touched his face with shame, looked at his hands, and patted his belly: I don’t like you, so please use it slowly.

Poor and happy: checkout. (Take out the fake 100), give me eighty yuan.

Lao Kaixin nodded, bent down, took the 100 yuan, and turned around to prepare for change. Qiu Kaixin had a very proud face.

Lao Kaixin: Sorry, this money is fake.

Poor and happy: I said you are telling lies with your eyes open, talking in your sleep in broad daylight, and telling jokes without teeth. You are clearly giving a real one (100). It is you who transferred the contract, trimmed the stolen goods, and put the blame on you. .

Old Happy: I took the money without moving my feet, without turning around, without getting into the drawer. I am not a magician who can do magic tricks, and I am not a Sun Wukong who can perform seventy-two transformations.

Poor and happy: I don’t care, what I give you is real money, you have to change 80 yuan. (Poor Happy is holding on to Old Happy) Can’t find it, can’t find it.

Old Happy: If you don’t look for it, don’t look for it.

Xiaoxinxuan: Why is it so noisy?

Lao Kaixin: Don’t think I’m asking you for anything. I won’t charge you, so you can drink and eat for free.

Poor and happy: Hey! You look down on me, you despise me, I am a big boss, a person with a good reputation and status, how can I say that I drink and eat for free, and I can’t find 80 yuan.

Xiao Xingxin: You are too brave to mix counterfeit money here. If it happens again, I'll call the police.

Poor people are happy: It’s better to call the police, it’s better to call the police, it’s better to call the police. I’m telling you, why are you happy in a teahouse? It’s because you’re happy with prostitution and making money by marketing counterfeit currency.

Lao Kaixin: Forget it, little sister, it’s a lot of trouble to call the police for a piece of jelly (100), at least you have to accompany the guests to have cigarettes and tea, sit down and eat, forget it, get your money back and avoid disaster Ask him for eighty yuan so as not to delay the business.

Be poor and happy: this is the best policy. (Left proudly with eighty yuan.)

Xiao Xingxin: We can’t be fooled in vain. (Little Happy pretended to be 100. He put on his backpack and dressed up as a "taxi" on the street.)

Poor Happy drove a taxi over, and Little Happy greeted him and got in the "taxi."

Poor and happy: My little sister goes there.

Xiao Xingxin: Drive forward and go where I want to go.

Poor and happy: My little sister (mi) is so funny, how do I know where you are going? Hey, is this a place like that?

The one in the *** room of the bar.

Little happiness: the dog lifts the door curtain with its mouth, the rooster pecks the mouse, drives your car, and makes money from you. ,,,cough! Parking in front. (Little Happy put his hands in the two purses, hesitating whether to take out the real coins or the fake coins. Little Happy blushed and his heart beat nervously, and finally took out a real coin. Poor Happy changed the money without looking at anything. Little Happy He turned around and left with a guilty conscience. When the car drove away, he took out the fake Mo Dong Dong (100) and looked at it.

Xiao Xingxin: It’s really useless. If I had just taken out the fake money to pay, it would actually be better. The driver didn't even look at it.

Xiaoxin was sorting out the driver's change, and was surprised to find that the driver found a fake fifty.

Xiaoxin returned to the teahouse.

Old Kaixin: There is no way to do business.

Little Kaixin: Don’t mention that a fake one didn’t come out, and another fake one came in.

Old Happy: I said you can't survive after eating. It's just 100 yuan. Consider yourself unlucky.

Little Happy: Why are we so unlucky? I'm not a bad person. I'm a good person. I'm not a good person. If you make a mistake, I will make a mistake.

Xiao Xingxin left: Yes!

Old Xingxin shook his head: Alas! Counterfeit money is harmful. p> (A mahjong table was set up on the stage, and two men and two women were playing mahjong. There was a "huh" sound, Xiaoxin shook his head, and Auntie Cui offered the money) Xiaoxin lost the money and took out a fake 100 and gave it to the aunt opposite. Don't give any change while shuffling the cards, Xiaoxin smiled proudly.

At this time, there was a movement, the door was about to open, everyone put away the money on the table, and the aunt couldn't wait to put the money down her waist. As soon as he stuffed it, a small lump appeared in his abdomen.

The two policemen came forward: Don’t move!

Xiao Xingxin: Uncle policeman, we have no money, we are all poor. Happy.

The policeman pointed at the aunt: Take out the money, hurry up.

The other policeman looked at the aunt’s belly from time to time, and the aunt blushed with embarrassment. Face it.

Police: Five hundred fines per person.

Aunt: I don’t have any money, really.

Police: No money, really. The policeman points to his girlfriend’s belly.)

Aunt: That’s the belly.

Policeman: I know it’s the belly.

Aunt: No stuffing, I'm pregnant.

Xiao Xingxin: Uncle policeman, she is pregnant. I will accompany her to the hospital for a B-ultrasound in the afternoon.

Police: She is pregnant, the rooster can lay eggs, B-ultrasound, boy or girl.

Aunt: I haven’t reached menopause, you! you.

Xiao Xingxin: It is illegal to conduct gender identification. You induced us to break the law.

The police yelled: I saw you stuffing money into your stomach, it was not honest.

The girlfriend slowly searched for money from her lower body and abdomen.

The policeman licked his saliva and counted the money.

Xiaoxin made a funny face in a hurry: What does the money found in a woman’s private parts taste like when licked in her mouth? Is it sour, sweet, fragrant, or rancid?

The policeman put away the money and spat on the ground. The police left.

The aunt was very discouraged: Unlucky, I just won some money today and became Yang Bailao again.

Xiao Xingxin: The police are still angry today. The money I gave you was counterfeit money.

Aunt: What, you are so bad, that’s why.

Little Happy: I know that it was the one who choked on drinking water, had a stomachache when eating, did somersaults while walking, overturned in a car, sank in a boat, and crashed in a plane.

Aunt: You are scolding yourself, why don’t you mess with me too.

Xiao Xingxin: Then you were scolded too. Didn’t you just trick the police?

Little Happy and Aunt laughed: Ha! ha! ha! Counterfeit money harms people, and one should be found to be invalid.

Lao Kaixin came up: You are right, leave this task to the police.

Xiao Xingxin: Then we won’t tip off the police today.

Old Happy: You should be happy, it was a blessing in disguise and you did a good deed.

Police officer: You are just in time. Two counterfeit coins were found among your fines. Counterfeit coins have been circulating rampantly in our city recently. Please go back to the police station to assist in the investigation.

Everyone looked at Xiaoxin and Auntie.

Little Happy and Auntie said to Old Happy: We are innocent victims.

Old Happy: Hi! Counterfeit money kills people.

Lao Kaixin faces all the audience: Good evening to all the bosses, masters, elder brothers, elder sisters, younger sisters, and younger brothers sitting here.

The audience applauded: OK!

Lao Kaixin will hold a publicity activity here today to identify genuine and counterfeit coins. There will be prizes for the event. Everyone is welcome to participate.

Enter Little Happy.

Lao Kaixin was stunned: Why did you come back?

Xiao Xingxin: What’s wrong with me? I am a victim, and the victim must be protected by the people’s police.

Old Kaixin: You don’t have any reproach in your conscience.

Xiaoxin: Aren’t I trying to make up for my mistakes and promote anti-counterfeiting and anti-counterfeiting activities?

Little Happy: Grandparents, uncles and aunts, elder brothers and sisters, younger brothers and younger sisters sitting here, have you been harmed by counterfeit currency? Please join us in the anti-counterfeiting activities. Let’s identify the real and counterfeit currency. Prize Q&A. 100 notes to identify the true and false marks, the prize for one correct answer is ten yuan, the prize for two correct answers is twenty yuan, and the prize for all correct answers is 100 yuan. We hope that through this activity, we can improve our ability to identify real and counterfeit coins, and let everyone shout like a rat crossing the street. Fight and let more real money go into our pockets.

Xiaoxin asked several male and female guests of different levels on the spot: From which parts can Dongdong identify the real thing and the fake one?

The audience raised their hands to answer the question:

Lao Kaixin presented the award on the spot.

Finally, a little happiness: the audience who won the prize today made money, and the audience who did not win the prize learned knowledge and were happy or not.

Audience: Happy.

Little Happy: Happy Teahouse, welcoming happy guests from all over the world with a happy smile.

Qiongxin came on stage, and the audience shouted, catch him, catch him. Little Happy and Old Happy hold back Poor Happy.

Is there any sketch that is suitable for three girls and nine boys? It would be funny. Don’t have too many lines and don’t have too many props.

Snow White and the seven dwarfs, a princess, a queen, seven dwarfs, a prince, and the dwarfs’ parents, well, it’s very funny. A short sketch with 3-4 people, it needs to be funny. , but not too long

Unlucky

Bai: On a certain day of a certain year, two people each drove a large truck with a load of 10 tons and met in an alley. .

A (shouted to Driver B) The ancients said, "When the weather is calm, step back 10 meters and let others go."

B thought: There is no way for me to give in!

B: That’s right, then please give in.

A thinks: Are you pretending to be stupid or are you really stupid? It doesn’t matter whether you are pretending to be stupid or really stupid, I won’t let you!

A: You better give in

B: You give in

A: You give in

B: You give in

A: You give in

...

Bai: The two drivers refused to give in to each other. They used his sharp tongue and iron teeth to fight with each other. 300 round-trips, no winner or loser.

A: (Lose) I took a detour

B: (Energetic) I won

The next day

Bai: Really a pair of enemies, these two met again in this alley.

A: I took a detour last time, it’s your turn this time

B thought: No way, let me take a detour, that’s a pretty idea.

B: Do you understand that the weak eat the strong? Let's see who can outlast the other

A: I've been prepared, look at the compressed biscuits

B: I've been prepared too.

4800 hours have passed

A: I have finished eating my compressed biscuits. I will take a detour, but you must tell me where your Pisa comes from?

B: Bisheng Home Delivery, delivered.

A: It’s true that “the truth is as high as the devil”

The next day

A: This time I brought: TV, computer, Refrigerator, washing machine, wardrobe, single bed, 1,000 kilograms of rice, rice cooker, solar cooker, solar battery, PSP3, NDSi...

B: But I brought a bulldozer

Ding Ling咣哴, Ding Ling咣哴, Ding Ling咣哴呛

The next day

Bai: They are really a pair of enemies. These two met again in this alley. . I'm tired of saying this.

B: What did you bring this time?

A: (Terrorist) Killer Team

B: (Grinning smile) Sorry, I brought the SWAT team. Ha ha ha ha!

At the end of the play, a junior high school performance needs a seven-person sketch that is simple and funny and does not need to be too long

Dad, I feel that I am too partial to subjects. I got 50 points in the Chinese test. Then I need to work harder on Chinese, but what about mathematics? 5 points. There is a class meeting in our class. Three of us want to perform a skit. It needs to be a drama. It needs to be funny. It cannot be too long. It is for three men.

Happy Childhood Five simple funny skits Shorter, not too long New Year’s Day performance Thank you

Idiots go to school

A: Class is in session, class is in session.

B: Hey, class is on, class is on, hurry up, class is on.

A: Hello, monitor.

B: Hello, I heard that our class has a new teacher, and she is a woman.

A: It doesn’t matter if she’s a boy or a girl, just drive her away when she comes.

B: Yeah.

C: Hey, how are you two?

AB: Good morning!

C: You’re here so early. Hey, did you hear that our class has a new class teacher?

AB: I know, I know, I’ve known it for a long time.

C: Oh, and she’s a woman.

AB: Got it, got it.

C: Hey, how about we stay and tidy her up. Give her a nickname.

A: Oh, yes, yes, this is a good idea. What kind of nickname is that?

C: Oh, it’s called morning glory.

A: Morning glory, too vulgar, too vulgar, too vulgar.

B: Is this good? Let's nickname her Old Hen.

A: Ah, old hen.

B: Yeah.

A: Bird flu is very serious now. Still, you dare to call me an old hen.

C: That’s right.

B: Well, let’s just call her an old maid.

AC: OK, OK

A: This is good, this is good, this is good.

B: This is a good idea. Will you call me later? (Pointing to C)

C: I won’t scream.

B: Then you call (point to A)

A: I won’t call either.

B: Then you don’t bark, and she doesn’t bark either, so who will?

C: Oh, yes, the fool will come later, let him bark.

B: Oh, good idea, good idea.

A: This is a good idea.

B: Fool, it’s class, it’s class, it’s class.

D: Here we go. (Appears in a sexy dance)~~Why are you laughing? I’ve never seen a handsome guy before

A: Hey, hey, you idiot.

D: Yeah.

A: Our class has a new teacher. We nicknamed her Spinster. When she comes, call her.

D: I won’t bark.

A: Why?

D: You always lie to me. Every time I open my mouth, you shut it.

A: No, I won’t lie to you this time.

BC: Yes.

A: We all yelled together.

BC: Yeah.

D: Won’t you lie to me this time?

ABC: Well, yes, I won’t lie to you this time. Call together.

D: Okay, let’s shout together.

E: Hello everyone, I am the new class teacher. I heard that students in this class are particularly difficult to teach, but I am very caring and I will use my love to influence them. Hello, classmates!

ABCD: Old.

D: Virginity is good.

E: Which little classmate called the teacher an old maid? Please step forward. (ABC steps back together) Little classmate, please stand up.

D: Yeah.

E: Little classmate, stand still.

D: Teacher: Your land is uneven.

E: Little classmate, you know what an old maid is.

D: My father said that people who have not been dealt with are called spinsters.

E: I am confident and patient. Little classmate, please go to the office with your teacher.

D: What?

E: The teacher treats you to chocolate.

D: Really?

E: Really, come on.

D: Yeah, let’s go eat some chocolate.

B: Hey, is this called an old maid eating chocolate?

C: Yes, I would have known what our names were.

A: That’s right.

E: I’ll treat you to chocolates, Dove’s, Jindi’s. Eat and eat until you’re full. (come out) I never punish my students corporally. Little classmate, you can come out now.

D: Here we go (dancing).

B: Hey, what’s wrong with you? Fool.

C: Fool, are you okay?

D: The teacher beats people.

ABC: Let's see, let's see.

A: Ouch, the injury is not serious?

B: Isn’t the beating gentle?

E: Next, the teacher will give you lesson 1. Come on, little students, please stand up.

D: Why is it me again?

E: Let me ask you a couplet. Which student can answer please raise your hand. Please listen clearly, the first couplet is: Nantongzhou and Beitongzhou, and North and South Tongzhou can north and south. Which little student can answer? Okay, is it just you, a female classmate, who can answer?

A: Pawnshops in the east pawnshops in the west, pawnshops in the east and things in the west.

E: Oh, that’s a good answer. Is there any other students who can raise their hands to answer? Little classmate, if you raise your hand, you can answer. Come on, please stand up and answer.

D: What?

E: Answer the couplet.

D: What couplet?

E: The first couplet is: Nantongzhou and Beitongzhou, and North and South Tongzhou can lead to north and south.

D: Male students are female students, and male students are male students.

E: It rhymes, that’s a good answer. Come on, teacher, let me ask you another question? Fragrant flowers are not red, red flowers are not fragrant, but roses are red and fragrant.

D: Loud farts don’t stink, smelly farts don’t make a sound, serial farts stink and are loud at the same time.

E: Monitor, no spanking.

D: That’s good, thank you.

E: Oh, I don’t believe it’s difficult for you. The teacher will ask you one more question? The big fish eats the small fish, the small fish eats the scared rice, and the scared rice eats water, and the truth comes out.

D: Haha! Your husband presses you, you press the bed, the bed presses the ground, and the earth shakes. (E hits D) I answered all the questions correctly, and you still hit me?

E: What kind of student are you? E: Monitor, you see the school anniversary is coming soon. What program has our class prepared?

B: What we prepare for teachers is recitation.

E: First let’s recite one.

B: Okay, first of all we recite Chunxiao for the teacher. I sleep in spring without realizing the dawn.

A: I hear singing birds everywhere.

C: The sound of wind and rain at night.

D: A young girl becomes a sister-in-law.

E: (Hit D) It has changed. Do you still want to change?

E: Who taught you?

D: The squad leader taught me.

D: Why do you keep hitting me?

E: Something went wrong as soon as I arrived at your place?

ABC: Teacher, please stop fighting, the principal is here.

E: The principal is here.

ABC: Fool, run. (End) Please give me some lines for a funny sketch. The request is not too long

The style is master algebra