What is the difference between you and your significant other’s ex?

Student Li Jun (pseudonym) is 29 years old this year. After graduating from college, he and his friends opened a photography studio. The income is not bad, and they are now considered to have a car and a house. Li Jun had been in several relationships before, but unfortunately they all ended in vain. Later, at a friend's gathering, he met his current girlfriend Pingping.

But Pingping has almost never met Li Jun’s friends, except for a few partners in the studio. Li Jun rarely brings Pingping with him to gatherings, and there is no news about Pingping in his circle of friends. Li Jun feels that love is a matter between two people and there is no need to make it known to everyone, but Pingping feels that Li Jun does not take her seriously.

Pingping also complained several times, but to no avail. So Pingping would "check on" Li Jun from time to time every day, and would also check Li Jun's mobile phone. For this reason, the two people quarreled more and more often.

Until one day, Pingping discovered that Li Jun was still in contact with his ex-girlfriend. In fact, it's not a big deal. I can't find the negatives my ex-girlfriend took at Li Jun's place, so I asked Li Jun if he had any backup. But Pingping's main point is that she thinks Li Jun should not hide it from her to see his ex-girlfriend.

The two had a big fight. Li Jun felt that Pingping was being unreasonable, so Pingping broke up. Li Jun felt that he was particularly wronged. He never thought about breaking up with Pingping, but no matter how he explained, Pingping refused to forgive him.

1. Keeping in touch with your ex makes your girlfriend lose her sense of security

In the process of love, the behavior that can easily make a woman lose her sense of security is that you cannot control the relationship with the opposite sex well. The distance between friends, especially being too close to your ex, can make women feel jealous, start to doubt your loyalty to the relationship, and worry that you will cheat. When a relationship is full of suspicion, the trust between the two people will be weakened. It has disintegrated, and the ending of the breakup has arisen.

2. Failure to establish effective communication, triggering conflicts

Not participating in her boyfriend’s social life, and contact with her ex-girlfriend, etc., gradually collapsed her girlfriend’s trust, and her love experience dropped sharply. . His girlfriend's disappointment gradually accumulated, and when the two had conflicts, Li Jun also adopted a cold approach, refusing to let each other step down, resulting in a constant ossification of the relationship. Love that lacks communication easily loses the lubricant of the relationship, making the relationship stiff and boring. Over time, the intensity of the relationship will decrease, and the relationship between you will be affected and become weak.

1. Adjust your mentality to meet women’s psychological needs.

Before trying to win back a woman, you need to adjust your mentality, improve the specificity of love, and realize that the ambiguous relationship between you and your ex is What women cannot tolerate, even if they are normal friends of the opposite sex, you need to have a good sense of scale. Since your girlfriend is already with you, you should try your best to avoid entanglements with your ex to prevent unnecessary consequences for your current girlfriend. misunderstanding, if you want to save her, you need to make her feel your feelings with practical actions.

2. Build a positive communication model

Now that you know the root cause of the breakup, what you have to do is to change this mode of getting along and learn to communicate. You need to master female psychology, the differences between male and female thinking, and communication skills, and effectively understand her true inner thoughts, and respect the other person’s wishes and thoughts. Only in this way can you accurately resolve the other person’s negative emotions and build a correct communication model with her. , only by learning correct communication can the conflicts between you be eliminated.

3. Pay attention to emotional investment and adjust your love model

You also need to pay attention to emotional investment in her and make up for the harm you caused her in the past. Emotional investment must be sustained and efficient. To achieve sustained and efficient emotional investment, you need to put yourself in her shoes, give her matching emotional investment based on her true emotional needs, be the first to appear when she needs you, and gradually Repair your broken love.

At the same time, you need to be willing to change your dating mode for her, maintain the balance of the love relationship, and let her participate in your life. When a woman sees your changes and actions, and feels your sincerity and sincerity, she will naturally gradually open her heart to you and gradually reach a comfortable relationship mode. At this time, you can successfully win her back by confessing to you.

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