Kneel down and beg for the script of "News Night Broadcast" of Hip Hop Baggage Shop!

I listened to the video myself, adding some burdens and deleting some.

Good evening, audience. Today is May 25th, 20 12. Welcome to the news broadcast program on the fifth day of the fourth lunar month.

The main content of today is:

................................. and ........................ participated in the performance.

World leaders sent congratulatory messages, in which they said: ..................... has made outstanding contributions to world peace and development in the past year, and especially affirmed the shameless spirit.

Celebrities from all walks of life came to the lecture hall to watch their performances. The performances watched today are:

Obama, bin Laden, Ban Ki-moon, Gaddafi, George W. Bush, Saddam Hussein, Kim Jong-un and Kim Jong-il.

I look at the list here and the list over there. People on both sides are very concerned about the performance.

Let's recall the main news categories of 20 12. Please refer to the following newsletter:

Fujian, A Bi hosted the Spring Festival Gala for the first time, but it was really different to have an old man behind the temple. The stars of the Spring Festival Gala all showed the standard of the Avenue of Stars.

The Year of the Loong Spring Festival Gala, Li is the strongest person ever! Because I followed Li from Qu Ying to Zhou Xun and then to Faye Wong, and my voice became hoarse.

A In the face of the simultaneous price increases of Sinopec, PetroChina and CNOOC, China Waste Oil made it clear that it would not follow up for the time being.

B in this regard, the broad masses have praised: this is a truly responsible and conscientious central enterprise!

A because the number 93 gasoline has risen to 8. When 33 yuan rises, the traffic volume decreases, the traffic volume increases, and the traffic pressure increases. Therefore, passers-by are restricted from May 1. Single eyelid one-day tour, double eyelid two-day tour, single and double night tour, those wearing sunglasses are treated as deliberately blocking the number plate, and those with double eyelids are treated as decks. Please tell each other and strictly implement it.

B 3. 15 fully exposed a group of large enterprises selling expired food. In fact, we should not condemn them, but thank them. They help us become indestructible.

A According to Xinhua News Agency, a restaurant in California, USA, caused more than 200 diners to be hospitalized with diarrhea because of using unsanitary tableware. However, diners from China not only did not feel any discomfort, but also participated in the rescue work. The American reporter at the scene said with emotion: "The era of China, the sick man of East Asia, is gone forever. Today's China people are immune."

B You see, the person who made medicine for leather shoes just ate salted duck eggs of Sudan red the day before yesterday, and the person who made Sudan red just drank gutter oil the day before yesterday. The breakfast milk for cooking waste oil is three solutions. The one who eats lean meat every day has diarrhea in the hospital, and now he eats leather shoes capsules ... so no one should apologize. This is a compound three-dimensional leap-forward comprehensive operation.

A If I want to eat jelly in the future, I will lick my leather shoes. If I want to eat old yogurt in the future, I will lick my leather shoes. If I catch a cold in the future, I will lick my leather shoes ... when I have money, I will buy two pairs of leather shoes, wear one and eat one!

B got the hall, got the kitchen, climbed the mountain, went to the pond, made yogurt, pressed capsules, 20 12, and the leather shoes were very busy!

A listens to the news that exposes all kinds of toxic food around her every day. Occasionally, the contents of harmful substances are clearly marked on cigarette packages. I am inexplicably moved ... or the most conscientious cigarette industry!

The deeds of Xiao Shenyang deeply touched many people's hearts. People praise the example of learning from small Shenyang and vigorously carry forward the spirit of small Shenyang. A number of pacesetters have sprung up all over the country to learn from small Shenyang.

A people's tolerance for corruption has reached a critical point, and the relevant departments have decided to greatly raise the critical point of the people.

B the central government decided to spend 1 100 million yuan to arrange for 300,000 bureau-level cadres to take the Long March again. Once the news was disclosed, it triggered a heated discussion among netizens. The people expressed their willingness to play the monarch for free. They also said that a corrupt official would never be allowed to arrive in northern Shaanxi alive.

Zhang Shang, a famous military expert, will give a reference table of the military strength of various countries. First, the United States can hit whoever it wants; second, I will hit whoever Britain and the United States hit; third, I will hit whoever France hits; fourth, I will let the United States hit whoever Japan hits; fifth, South Korea will fight the United States; sixth, I will hit whoever Russia hits; seventh, I will scold whoever China hits; eighth, I will hit South Korea if North Korea provokes me.

B North Korea is really a strange country. As long as you are fat, you will become a national leader sooner or later.

A North Korea is very poor. I have saved a rocket for so many years, but I let it go like a monkey.

Japanese tourist Kiichiro Kawahara lost and found his bike in Wuhan. He deeply thanked the people of Wuhan. Actually, it's nothing. Photographer Mr. Chen lost his computer, and the whole society helped him find his photos! Arab Zhou Zi beat Han Han, which provided us with two understandings. One is that Han Han is not a god, and the other is that Fang is not a person.

B: A university was bombed, and girls were invaded by campus security guards. In order to eliminate the negative effects and appease the girls, the school has set the conditions of "guaranteeing research". As soon as the news came out, the school security collective demanded to resign, and the vice captain of the security brigade complained to reporters that "the school's practice is ridiculous, and it is impossible to cover up the ugliness without taking legal procedures." You see, this has made us very passive, and they almost dragged us into the grass on several patrols. This is too dangerous! At the same time, security uniforms are very popular in this school, and almost every boy has one. ...

AiPad 3 was released as scheduled, supporting 10 language, but without Korean. Korean netizens expressed regret and said: "Korea is a market that cannot be ignored. Why not support Korean? " China netizens commented that apples are old and spicy, which fundamentally eliminated the possibility that apples were invented by Koreans.

B Messi finally surpassed the United Arab League in scoring per game through unremitting efforts.

A Su Qi deleted all Weibo, and a fan of 200,000 quarreled with a fan of 4 million, forcing a fan of100,000 to delete Weibo.

After 39 years of hard research and practical investigation, a master of Oxford University in England made an amazing discovery. He recorded all his scientific research achievements in a book. This book is called What Are Men Thinking Except Women. It is 200 pages thick, but every page is blank except the cover. It is said that the Chinese manuscript of this book has been widely circulated in the market, and its Chinese translation is called soft copy!

A Some people say that Tomb-Sweeping Day burned Apple phones because he was afraid that his ancestors wouldn't use them. The owner of the sacrifice shop said: Jobs has gone down to teach, please rest assured.

There is a generation in China. When they were in primary school, universities didn't need money. In college, primary schools don't need money; When there is no work, assign work; When you can work, you have to find a job; When you don't make money, the house is allocated. When you can make money, you find that you can't afford a house and a wife. Before entering the stock market, fools are making money; I found myself a fool when I rushed in. They are always in no hurry, but they are still determined to live. They are post-80s.

A drives the world's most expensive car, pays the world's most expensive fee, burns the world's most expensive oil, drives on the world's most blocked roads, pays the world's most expensive money to buy roads, avoids the world's most privileged cars, touches the world's most secretive electronics, and worries about the world's most bizarre fines. They are also determined to live. They are from China.

Many people don't like watching news broadcast, because they are jealous of the good life of China people.

A Today's news broadcast is over.

B thanks for watching.