How did the middle-aged derailed woman break up?

The first one, carried away by the so-called love, became irrational. Why do women cheat? In my opinion, it is nothing more than dissatisfaction with the current marriage life. Women think that they will get the ideal love with their lover, so they will choose to cheat and immerse themselves in the gentle village of their lover. But in fact, they are just carried away by love, becoming no longer awake and losing their minds. Coupled with some sweet words, vows of eternal love, cheating women will not get out of this affair, so they can't cut off contact with their lovers and get deeper and deeper in the affair. The second one, seduced by money, has become very realistic. Women cheat, probably for the lover's money. In real life, many women are money worshippers. When they can't get financial satisfaction from their husbands, they will choose to cheat and find richer lovers. When women get used to this life of being addicted to money and getting what they want, it is difficult for women to live a bitter life of eating bran and swallowing vegetables again. Therefore, there is another reason why women can't keep in touch with their lovers, and that is to be tempted by money and become very realistic. Third, women are more emotional and it is difficult to give up any relationship. As an emotional creature, it is difficult for a woman to give up any relationship, especially in the face of extremely exciting extramarital affairs. Although the cost of a woman's infidelity is great, as long as she pays the true feelings for her lover, she can't sever the relationship with her lover. This is one of the reasons why a woman can't end her relationship with her lover after cheating. A woman, even if she can't break contact with her lover, will try her best to end this doomed love. Women, even if they have more dissatisfaction with their husbands, should not embark on the track of derailment. Once you cheat, both your family and your lover will lose. For the happiness and happiness of marriage, women should kill the idea of cheating in the cradle. How do middle-aged derailed women break extramarital affairs? I am a woman who has been married for five years, and my husband has a daughter. In the first three years of marriage, the family was warm and happy. In the fourth year of change, my husband's work changed and became busy, while I was just the opposite, and my work was very leisurely. This broke the enough time that my husband and I used to spend together: cooking after class, taking a walk after dinner, and learning games with my children ..... My husband's work of leaving early and returning late makes our language and behavior overlap little, and the topics of occasional communication are also very light. I was born with a gentle shell, never complained to my husband, and tried to be a husband and a good wife in the eyes of the outside world. After living like this for half a year, I met my cheating married man Hui in the cafe I often go to. There, I found an outlet to express myself, and when I got along with him, I felt more relaxed and comfortable than ever before. Hui likes photography, I like painting, and we communicate well. I spent half a year with Hui. On my birthday, I had sex with Hui, satisfied and flustered. But a few times later, in the face of her husband's fatigue and her daughter's charm, my inner defense against Ah Hui's joy collapsed. Waves of guilt and shame spread throughout my heart, but my husband didn't notice. I indulge myself to talk to Hui, and so on. Lying beside my husband at night will make me feel insomnia. I hinted to my husband that I was going to cheat. My husband Dou Yun was indifferent and decided that I wouldn't do that. His attitude made me angry, and I went to see Hui more often. As a result, my inner depression, struggle and pain are aggravated. After cheating for a year, I am eager to return to my family completely and let Ah Hui go completely, but I can't erase my "dirty" knot of cheating. What should I do to put down the shackles of body and mind and return to my family? Nothing in the world can escape the law of cause and effect. Here, Xiaoya's infidelity is just a "result", and the corresponding "cause" has actually been lurking in life for a long time. Why do married women get involved in extramarital affairs in middle age? How to break the relationship and return to the family? Today, by discussing and analyzing the deep-seated reasons of married women's infidelity, we can better understand and deal with the occurrence of infidelity. Analysis of cheating mechanism: 1, Coolidge effect From a biological point of view, people have a physiological reaction of "seeing new people more happily" in love. Dopamine in the human body will be activated under the action of new species, which will drive us to take actions, such as mating, intimacy and adventure. This is the Coolidge effect in psychology. This can be said to be a "despicable" primitive biochemical psychological mechanism, which is how Xiaoya fell into before the new role. Almost all couples will encounter this kind of influence, which will hinder the long-term happiness of marriage, especially the infidelity of men. It's all caused by this physiological factor. In fact, we can alleviate this influence through some sexual methods, such as appropriate flirting skills or some sexual fantasies about our partners, so as to increase dopamine and promote long-term emotional moisturizing. 2, the horrible balance of an affair, you and the derailed object are like sitting on a seesaw. In order to achieve absolute balance, grab each other's handles. In this case, no one dares to throw caution to the wind easily. And Hui are both married. They enjoy the pleasure of extramarital affairs, and will not destroy the marriage of one of them and turn extramarital affairs into husband-wife relations. However, people are contradictory, not without feelings. Machines are not animals that rely solely on instinct. Many people who cheat are eager for reason in emotional confusion and love in rational order. Under this contradiction, Xiaoya is full of great depression and struggle for her infidelity. 3. Alexithymia: A person can't describe his feelings well and can't convey his feelings completely. Empathy obstacle: a person cannot accurately perceive the emotions of others and empathize with others. Xiaoya was full of resentment because her husband was busy and tired, but she didn't communicate frankly with him. As a result, my heart knot is getting bigger and bigger, and I have nothing to say with my husband gradually, and I have lost good communication. Xiaoya's husband can't empathize with Xiaoya's physical and mental emotions, and he can't understand Xiaoya's emotional feelings of cheating. Xiaoya couldn't express her feelings well, and her husband couldn't notice that the relationship between them was in a vicious circle. Many people regard "emotion is invisible" as a sign of maturity, but it is actually the "enemy" of love relationship. I hope Xiaoya can frankly express her feelings to her husband and have a suitable emotional experience with her husband. Psychological types of women's infidelity: Generally speaking, it can be divided into emotional infidelity and physical infidelity. In Xiaoya, there are soul mates, curiosity-seeking and kidnapping, impulsive revenge and unwilling status quo. Unwilling to be empty and comfortable, I found communication with my spiritual level in Hui. First, she spent half a year in an affair. Later, she was kidnapped by spiritual communication and had a physical infidelity. After not being understood by her husband, she continued to cheat with revenge. Under the normal marriage in China, a woman can be any role, but not herself. I found a certain self in Hui, but if she chooses to find resonance from a third party, it will only lead to more problems. As long as one of the husband and wife cheated, the whole family overturned the case. Only when the wrongdoer truly admits his mistake, repents and compensates, can he seek and win forgiveness and get real forgiveness. Cheating woman, "You are both a prisoner in the prison and a keeper of the key": You are suffering in the derailed prison now, but you also built this derailed prison, so you should try your best to get out after knowing the truth of your feelings. It has been said in "The Therapeutic Mode of Marital Infidelity" that it is crazy to hide secrets. Only telling the truth can save the crisis, create a sincere communication environment for both sides and provide opportunities for self-examination. Husband and wife should learn to be frank, and good communication is a solid shield to protect the marriage castle. A devastating crisis sometimes becomes a turning point of new hope. Sometimes there is great potential hidden behind fragility and trough, and its value and significance will only be discovered if you really experience it. Married women can return to a truly happy marriage if they realize the important value of family after this derailment. On the one hand, everyone has the nature of pursuing novelty, on the other hand, there is a desire to pursue belonging. It is in this kind of conflict that many people push their marriage to a crisis. Woman, your name is Happy. If you also meet yourself in this rough period, please don't choose to escape and suppress the pain, which will worsen its cycle; We should see clearly the essence of feelings in time, find appropriate channels and ways to resolve them, and return ourselves to a complete happiness. How do middle-aged derailed women break extramarital affairs? How did the extramarital affair break completely? The most thorough extramarital affair, of course, is geographical isolation. If two people never meet again, even if they can use communication tools to cheat emotionally, they will be banned if they want to cheat physically. After a long time, this unstable relationship will be broken sooner or later. Another kind is that the cheater and the third party finally tear their faces because of contradictions or estrangement, and then the two sides begin to hate each other, and they either quarrel or tear together, completely losing romance and excitement, and losing the original sweetness and joy. At this time, the affair relationship completely entered a dead end. See the nature of extramarital affairs clearly. Extramarital affairs are often the function of passion. Don't think there is much true love in them. This feeling is very fragile because there is no common interest. When encountering a small storm, we can overcome it and make do with the only freshness and attachment of two people. If an event touches the interests of either party, the other party will be strongly shaken and the fuse of breaking up will be lit. If you think a married man loves you very much, you might as well scare him: I'm pregnant and you want to divorce and marry me. Look at his reaction, and you will know how much he loves you. Understand that extramarital affairs have no airtight walls. Many people step into extramarital affairs with luck, thinking that they will not be discovered by outsiders. In fact, as long as you do one thing, you will leave clues, and one day you will be found, and you can't cry. There was a one-night stand chat record of a netizen a year ago, which she had long forgotten, but when her husband was repairing the computer, he found that the one-night affair led to the breakdown and death of the family, and she regretted it for life. By analyzing the advantages and disadvantages of extramarital affairs, it is found that the enjoyment brought by extramarital affairs is the release of emotions and the venting of the body, which leads to a happy mood, but the loss of money, time and energy, the mental pain of not exposing emotions in the sun and the hard work of hiding lies. Once the facts of extramarital affairs are exposed, there are only disadvantages, such as restless family, affecting work, betrayal and so on.