Please give me a few classic words, funny or sad, not about love.

Guo Degang Quotations

1: "Excuse me, sir, how to get to the United States?" "Who knows...ask the village chief!" 2: It doesn't cost you to speak louder. electricity! 3: Don’t leave until the show is over, go have a meal - whoever goes will pay. 4: The cross talk is great! Criticize the ugliness, Huoxiang Zhengqi (promote righteousness). 5: There are more than a thousand traditional cross talk pieces left by the old man. After our actors’ continuous efforts over the years, there are still more than 400 pieces left. There are still 300 paragraphs that are not allowed to be mentioned, and there are 100 paragraphs that conflict with the construction of a harmonious society. 6: Listening to more cross talk shows that you are patriotic. There is a child in our neighborhood who can speak seven or eight foreign languages, including English, Japanese, Korean, South Slavic, North Slavic, West Slavic... Anyway, he can't be the same when sitting with the Eight-Power Allied Forces and yelling at each other! Tell him to go listen to cross talk. "Don't go! I don't understand!" I would have beaten him to death if the law didn't matter! He can't understand cross talk in seven or eight foreign languages! 7: The house we live in is riddled with holes, and if it rains, it could kill us: it rains moderately in the house where it rains slightly outside, and it rains heavily in the house where it rains heavily outside. Sometimes the rain is really too heavy, and the whole family goes to the yard to take shelter from the rain. 8: We decided that we would like to be a winged bird in heaven and a broccoli on earth. 9: Everyone is willing to listen, willing to listen, or willing to listen. I will never force it. 10: This guy robbed a bank and drove up the North Third Ring Road. It’s half past five in the afternoon! When the police arrived, the road was blocked. 11: Your shameless look is very much like my charm back then. Fallen leaves return to their roots - Guo Degang

12: Huh? You don't know me? I am an artist! I've been an artist for over a week. 13: Guo Degang: Brother Di, I hope that the world will be peaceful, that the people of the world will live and work in peace and contentment, that the country will be peaceful and the people will be safe, and that there will be no war. Is that okay, eh? God thought for a while, this is difficult, let's tell the truth, I'm not that great, really, brother, I'm not refuting your face, and I won't tell you anything else, can you do something else? Let's discuss something else. I brought a photo of Yu Qian with me. Brother Di, look at this. This is my senior brother. His name is Yu Qian (Li Jing). He is quite cold-looking and cannot find a partner. You can make him beautiful. Just a little bit. God: (Thinking about it) Let’s talk about world peace (tearing up the photo) Guo Degang: Hey, why did you tear up the photo? You disagree or disagree, why did you tear it up? I still keep it to ward off evil spirits! 14: My family is rich, and I drive a Cadillac with an opening of 13. As soon as you hear the sound, you can tell that it is a good machine, imported from Germany, with a "chugging, chugging" sound. Oh, Sanbengzi. As soon as you start driving, half of Beijing will be filled with black smoke, and the traffic police will shout directly at you: "Elder Sun, please take away your magical powers." 15: From now on, I will never eat lobster without cake. 16: If the grenades cost one dollar and six, I would have thrown you a hundred dollars first. If the law had not been ignored, I would have beaten you to death! 17: This young man looks like an actor with his face covered... 18: Okay! This plane is just like Daihatsu, and it also has a swing glass! ... Dafa and Xiali don't give me any reimbursement... There is no Dafa in Tianjin, so they all went to the United States... I flew to the United States for half a year and refueled with more than 40,000 yuan in gas. . 19: Guo: What should I do? I'm too rich. I don’t know how I spent it. Why? ! Yu Qian, how about I support you? Yu: Guarantee me? ! Guo: Ah... no... no matter how rich we are, we still have to choose our looks! 20: The birthday boy: Jade Emperor!~Something happened. The Jade Emperor: What’s wrong, birthday boy? The birthday girl: Do you have a hammer and nails? Lend me some help. My sika deer chewed up the railing. The Jade Emperor: The birthday boy, let me What can I say to you? It doesn’t matter if you ride the deer, you have to feed it! ~ 21: Guo Degang: I got a good job as soon as I came here, building a chimney of more than 70 meters! Yu Qian: It’s really good! Guo Degang: We worked early in the morning and worked late at night, and then they came to check and accept it, but they didn’t give us any wages! Yu Qian: The quality is not good? Guo Degang: I took down the drawings and asked them to dig a well! 22: Guo: Hey~~~! There was once an opportunity to make money in front of me, but I didn't take it seriously. The opportunity has passed, and I regret it beyond words. The most painful thing in the world is this. If God gives me another chance, I hope to tell the village chief: I am willing to go. If I had to add a limit in front of that salary, I hope it would be: 400 yuan. 23: It’s cold, so I sent you a coat. The post office said it was too heavy, so I took off the buttons and put them in my pocket. You can sew them yourself. 24: Paris... Did you know there is a zoo in Paris... Across from the zoo... Hey... There is a clothes seller across from the zoo... You can't say you buy clothes... You have to say you want goods... 25: - Wenshun, what did you get? ——I didn’t tell you that I brought boiled eggs. ——Give it to me. ——No...guess, guess how many. ——I guess you give me one. ——…You have to guess, I’ll give you both of these ——…I thought about it for a long time, 5, right? 26: - It's a denture - throw it away quickly. ——Don’t throw it away, what a pity.

——What? ——Tie a small stick on it and use it as an itch scratcher. 27: "The story I told today is not that far away from now. If you have elderly people at home, you can go back and ask - it was during the Spring and Autumn Period and the Warring States Period..." 28: Flight 9014, bound for Daxinghuang Village from Daxizhimen, fare is 5 yuan , please board the plane. You said this is so...so interesting. The flight attendant stood there and shouted, "Come on, get on, get on, there's a big seat, there's a big seat." Guarantee you a big seat! 29: When so-and-so was born, his father fell ill. After returning home, his mother had the most difficult time. Here is the husband, here is the child, both have to be taken care of. Feed this child with milk, feed that child with medicine, feed him with milk, and give him medicine. Give me medicine, give me milk. His father is very strong, and the child took the wrong medicine. 30: Withered vines and old trees, dim crows, small bridges and flowing water. The horse is thin in the west wind on the ancient road, the sun sets in the west, and the man with a broken heart... is in the hospital... and he still doesn't go to the hospital even if his intestines are broken! ...I am the number one master in tampering with Tang poetry and Song lyrics. 31: Those who abide by the law are melancholy in court, have strong beams and sing joyfully night after night, benefit themselves at the expense of others and ride on mules, be upright and fair and starve. Repairing bridges and repairing roads is blind, and there are many murders and arson. I went to the West and asked my Buddha, and the Buddha said: I can't do it either! 32: "There is a bright moonlight in front of the bed. I suspect it is frost on the ground. I look up at the bright moon. (Pop! Knock on the wood) My name is Guo Degang. There are many people here. I am very happy. Thank you all for coming. We will leave later. Don’t leave, go and eat. It’s 20 to listen to the cross talk, and it’s 16,000 more.” 33: “Why do we fall in love with the TV station? Applause. As soon as I came on stage, 'today', wow - (thundering applause), 'we two', wow - applause everywhere, 'for everyone', wow - a round of applause, 'tell me a story', wow -, "Sound", wow--, (praising: every word is a drum!) "It's not good", wow--. You see how good it is today, not a single person applauds." . 34: Yu Qian: The remaining tooth was stuffed. Guo Degang: He ate lotus root and got a hole in his eye! 35: "I am a rich man. I was the only one who drove here backstage today, and they all came on foot. Those old gentlemen in Tianjin left on Tuesday. But my car has been having some problems recently. The speed was a bit slow. At first, I thought the carburetor was broken, but after checking, I found out that the pedals had fallen off..." 36: "So and so, so and so, everyone looks like a pancake all the time. It's okay. I just eat pancakes and steamed buns with rice. They are made of porcelain and are easy to carry. Sometimes I come backstage and bring pancakes and fruits to prepare for the banquet..." "I am the first person in ancient times to drink so much in the banquet. ” 37: Where is my gun? Lend me the clothes of a security guard, I will wear them and beat him. It takes five minutes for someone like you to be shot. If you are caught like this, you will collapse first and ask questions later. 38: A gangster knows martial arts and no one can stop him! Scientists know martial arts and can't stop even gangsters! 39: I’m going to risk my life! 40: How would I describe his appearance to you? Have you ever seen roasted sweet potatoes? They were freshly roasted. They were too hot to hold in your hands. I accidentally lost my grip and dropped them on the ground. Over there, a kid ran up wearing spiked shoes and stepped on the sweet potatoes. . . His face looks like a piece of sweet potato. (Praise: His appearance can tell a story) 41: I want to go against the three customs. 42: You are very vulgar - but I like it. 43: (Henan dialect) "Why are you here? What have you been doing, you son of a bitch!" "I'm going to slap you!" 44: I came to the train station with Bibia, and all the tickets were sold. No more prejudice. I went to a policeman and asked, "Do you know where the ticket seller is?" The policeman was delighted: "I'm still looking for him!" 45: I want to commit suicide and plan to jump off a building. I have researched on this jumping off building, 2nd floor It’s different from the 20th floor. The 2nd floor is “Pa! Ah~~”, while the 20th floor is “Ah~~~Pa!” Guo Degang

46: When I heard the news of your father’s death, my neighbors burst into tears. One piece: "Such a good man, it's too late to die!" 47: At around 12 o'clock in the middle of the night, the two gentlemen took to the street naked, and Li Jing was the only one wearing glasses - if she wore a mask, it would be considered a three-point style. 48: The two nurses who came down are so beautiful: they are 1.7 meters tall, with sideburns and beards, and a wide palm to protect their heart hair. 49: Yu Qian’s father-Mr. Wang. 50: Li Jing has a cousin who can tiptoe under Xia Li in high heels. She is so shabby. Her photo is posted on the door to ward off evil spirits and on the bed for contraception.

51-100

51: Which gangster have you seen with a tattoo of Crayon Shin-chan? 52: Don’t I know you yet? If you touch wine, you will get drunk; if you see the world, you will be confused; if you encounter money, you will become obsessed with it; if you pick up the pen, you will forget to write. One advantage you have is that your eyes turn digital as soon as you see a big girl. 53: "Single Sword Club" Everyone knows that Liu Guan and Zhang Taoyuan were sworn brothers. The three brothers kowtowed to the ground like brothers, and then the three brothers protected Tang Monk and went to Xitian to obtain Buddhist scriptures. There is this story in "A Dream of Red Mansions". 54: The mainstream cross talk community is not troubled by failure, but troubled by the lack of excuses for failure. 55: We all drove back to Beijing. Teacher Yu had a higher status than us. He saw us driving and looked down on us, so he rode his bicycle back. 56: Guo Degang: Write your father’s name. The Qin Dynasty appointed Yu Taigong (tabu) as a minister of rank and entered the pot.

Yu Qian: My dad calls the fish into the pot. What’s his name? Guo Degang: No matter what it is called, Yu...Yu Shaoqian, write it down. 57: Beat the monk after you finish reciting the sutra. 58: Guo Degang: Invite the lay people from the lay community to write a curse for your father. Yu Qian: Yes. Guo Degang: Can ordinary people invite you? The ones from Jushilin are here, the ones from Gongdelin are here, the ones from Qishilin are here, the ones from McDonald’s are here, and the ones from Quanjude are also here. 59: Guo Degang: Seeing your father like this makes me feel bad. I grew up with the old man, and the one who grew up in front of me watched me grow up. Now that he is so ill, how can I feel in my heart? Yu Qian: That’s right. Guo Degang: Alas... (pointing) Old man, you too have today. 60: Guo Degang: Once there was a corpse dismemberment case. The corpse was dismembered and cut into eight pieces. It was too horrible to watch. The police detective asked Yu Qian: "What do you think this is going on?" Yu Qian thought for a while and said, "I think this is suicide." Guo Degang plays the photographer in "The Founding of the People's Republic of China"

Police: Ah, suicide? Guo Degang: The police detective liked Yu Qian so much that he pointed at the corpse and said, "It would be great if he were you." 61: There are three big characters "Tongguan" written on the tower. 62: You have never seen my wife, she is beautiful! He is tall, has a big face, heavy eyebrows, big black eyes. She has no beard. If she had a beard, she would be like Zhang Fei. 63: He took out a gold pen. It was bright and eye-catching, but cold and cold. 64: This plane is also diesel powered. 65: Guo: Hey, the White House is white—it was freshly painted. Yu: You can control others but not others! 65: There were about twenty people standing in front of the White House, some men and some women, with their bags ready -- reporters! I have to be careful what I say, so as not to let them take advantage of me and embarrass the Chinese people. Going downstairs, this group of people came over: "Master, do you want to sell?" The seller! What do you think the White House Cultural Affairs Bureau does for food? There is a rockery inside the White House, with a banner underneath: Family planning is everyone’s responsibility. 67: One day the master went down the mountain to dance disco. He accidentally met the daughter of his childhood confidante. From the moment he saw her, the master knew that his career in the world was over. Destined to leave these days when the white clothes come and go like the wind, the old man resolutely put on a wig and returned to the world at the age of eighty. 68: If two people are dependent on each other, it doesn’t matter whether they have pork or pork. 69: Guo: Tieling is still a few stops away from the United States! Yu: Is there another station here? ! 70: There are four dishes on the table. Open the first one and look at it. Ha! very nice! Old vinegar peanuts! Open the second one, even better! Old vinegar peanuts! Open the third one, peanuts, no vinegar! The fourth one saw a plate of vinegar! 71: If there are difficulties, we should help. If there are no difficulties, we should help even if they create difficulties. 72: The girl turned around and combed her four hairs. 73: As we were walking, hey, there was a question mark in front of us, and Liu Bei jumped "唔奕奕奛". Hey, a mushroom came out. After eating the mushroom, Liu Bei grew taller. Still walking forward, there was another question mark. When he touched it, a flower came out. After eating the flower, Liu Bei raised his hand and said, "Beep." Dududududu "Can shoot bullets! Here comes the thorny bastard... 74: What's your name?" ah! What name? Don't say it! If you say it, it's just a curse! You know how much I eat, and I don’t like roast duck, so after eating four of them I couldn’t eat any more, so I said: I really can’t eat it, and I have to eat when I get home later. 75: Oh my god, it’s so exciting! 76: At the “Anti-Three Customs” conference, I felt very generous when I saw the passionate and generous expressions of my colleagues. I wanted to advise them: “Don’t tell me stories about the underworld as a work-study student. " 77: Guo Degang: Your wife is crying. Yu Qian: It hurts! Guo Degang: My legs hurt~~~ 78: Turns out he can talk. I thought he was blind. 79: Guo Degang: "Your grandma told your mother: 'Jinlian, you are leaving.' Yu Qian: "Ah, Guo Degang and Yu Qian!" Guo Degang: "What are you in a hurry? I haven't said that your grandpa's surname is Pan. " 80: A few inhuman gangsters took advantage of the moonlight to insult Li Qing's cousin. As soon as the moon came out, the gangsters hand in hand and surrendered. 81: When people do good things, they always want the ghosts and gods to know, and when they do bad things, they always want to know. Let the ghosts and gods not know, we are too embarrassed for the ghosts. 82: I like to play the flute, I told my wife that I buried the flute with me when I died. I like the erhu, and I told my wife that I buried the erhu with me when I died. Buried it with me, and recently I fell in love with chime bells... My wife said: It's so easy to dig out the country, don't bury it. 83: Guo Degang: I want to steal the two terracotta warriors and horses, and confuse Yu Qian and his father. Then put the terracotta warriors in the mud, wash them and write on them "Eight Honors and Eight Disgraces" and sell them to the Pan family. Yu Qian: You are quite capable of selling the real thing as a fake. 84: Roll the steamed buns with rice. To eat, the international celebrity eats stir-fried liver in the morning, stews with braised pork at noon, and stews yeast in the evening. Yu Qian: This international celebrity is quite shameful. 85: He tore off his clothes, slapped his heart with a wide palm, and had two tattoos on his chest. Hairtail. 86: Guo Degang: Are there many mummies? ..... Hey, Yu Qian, you can stay idle. How about I wrap you in a white cloth and lie there? Yu Qian: No.

Have you forgotten, my father and I were standing by the Terracotta Warriors and Horses? Guo Degang: ...Why does your cross talk look like a TV series? 87: King: Is this a monster paid tribute by the Fan Gang? 88: Guo: "Tell me, there are two Japanese people living in our community. They are both quite tall." Yu: "How tall are they?" Guo: "The man is 1.4 meters and the woman is 1.2 meters." Yu: "This is still called high." Guo: "Hey, there's something wrong with you. This is considered high in Japan." 89: This Mr. Zhou, when he was three or four years old, he was playing in the backyard of his home. Suddenly, a fairy flew up from the sky and landed in front of him. He was very puzzled: "What kind of bird is this? This is, ah!" The fairy was very unhappy: "Don't fool around. Ah! This kid must be very respectful to the gods, you know? Or else I, Guo Degang, will get slapped with video games." The child was frightened: "The gangsters on the street are just trying to scare me. What are your orders? I'll steal my father's money for you." The god said, "You're talking nonsense! There's something else going on this time." 90: How many people are there on earth? How many watches, bad people's hands turn faster, good people's hands turn slower. "Where are my watch hands?" "Oh, I'm working as a fan in God's house." 91: Everyone knows "Water Margin". It is a classic literary masterpiece adapted from a TV series. 92: It rained twice this week, one for 3 days and one for 4 days. 93: My friend said that he printed counterfeit money for me, and I gave it to him. 50~~ He gave me 1 yuan, and I couldn’t spend it anywhere. I thought for two months whether he was lying to me. 94: Guo: Do ??you have any chickens here? Waiter: Shh! ! ! ! I am! Guo: You? Su: Yes. Guo: Come on, eat, I want it. Later, she took me to a small room at the back. There's no table here either, just a single bed. She locked the door and turned out the light. The next morning, the sun came out. Yu: First tell me what happened after the lights were turned off? Guo: After the lights were turned off...the next morning, the sun came out. The sun was so big! Yu: Tell me what happened after the lights were turned off. Guo: After the lights were turned off, the police came and fined me 2,000 yuan. 95: Little girl, give me a smile. If you don’t smile, he will give you a smile. 96: Guo Degang: I turned around and stood at the door of the bathroom. I felt much calmer. Then a man came out of the bathroom opposite. 97: The old father is lying on the bed. You are a filial son. When you see the old father like this, you rub him against the bed and run to the bed. You see that the old man is not right at this time. He is making trouble. He has something to say, but he can’t say it. I came out and asked for a pen. I brought a pen and paper and wrote a few words on the paper with a trembling voice, "Get out! You stepped on my oxygen tube." 98: Guo Degang: A director asked me to shoot a nude scene. My beautiful butt was gone. When I came back, I was crying like Liu Bei: I was naked and acted like a floating corpse in the river with more than 20 old men. I froze to death. I came to me again the next day and said There was a kissing scene that couldn't be done without me, so we went off and cried like Liu Bei: The kiss was a kiss with a hippopotamus, and the hippopotamus' mouth was so big that it covered my head. Went in. Later, he came to me and told me that there was a bed scene where my beautiful butt was so wet. When I came back, I was crying like Liu Bei: The bed scene is about having sex, and I have to be passionate to play cotton on the bed. Hurry up. I fainted. 99: "I opened the letter and read: "My child, you have been away from home for a year in a blink of an eye. Today, after being reminded by my neighbor, I remembered that there is still a child like you. Our family has moved. It turned out to be a place 400 miles away. Guess where it is? ... Come back quickly, we are waiting for you! "(Crying) Where can I find you?" 100: You have a good physique. You can tell at a glance that you will live until death.

101-150

101: His sword is cold, his knife is also cold, his heart is cold, his blood is cold...this The grandson is freezing! 102: Go your own way, let whoever wants to say it 103: "When I look at your dad, I burst into tears. The old man is over seventy, and his son has not been home for so many days. The old man is anxious. , Can you not be in a hurry? I am cooking mutton at home at this time. As soon as I walked in, the old man, what is that, Yu Qian, Yu Qian, you know, Yu Qian? Who is it? Yu Qian, your son, he is dead, what?! Yu Qian ~~My son~~is dead~~~You, you, pass me the shrimp." Guo Degang and Yu Qian

104: Guo: Our teacher, Corporal James, an American five-star general. Yu: Wait a minute, you are already a general, how can you give me a corporal? Guo: After making the sauce, don’t you have to sell it on the market? 105: Guo: That gold and silver treasure has the highest price! Time is like a sword that cuts people! The shuttle between the sun and the moon is so exciting! The three golden rays of the Sun Buddha can bring people to a boil. (Thump, thump, ding, boom, thump) Endure and endure and endure, the first three words of "endure" come to mind. Even if you become a bastard, you have to endure it, turn a blind eye and pretend not to see it. Guo: Are you watching? Yu: I didn’t look at it. Guo: Pretend not to look at it. 106: There is naked hatred only between peers.

107: This guy is the worst! He killed his father at the age of 13, pushed his mother into the river at the age of 15, and killed his entire family at the age of 17! After looking at her for less than 5 minutes, tears came down - "Sister, I think this is a misunderstanding..." 108: That's your dad, I'm talking about your father! 109: I participate, you contribute, I am happy! 110: Heaven and earth are silent, broad-minded, everyone’s affairs are my business, benefiting the people, relieving the society’s worries, specializing in helping you powerless and mentally retarded groups, (vulnerable groups) take your affairs as mine No matter what, everyone looks like my children. 111: After my counseling, many people who were on the verge of committing suicide tried to kill someone. I was the one who helped them. 112: Buy a PHS phone and beat the person to death, first the one who curses, then the one who apologizes. When buying, buy a genuine one, buy a pirated one, fast forward to see one, and rewind to see one. (Yu Qian: I didn’t read any of the serious articles) Buy a washing machine with two tanks, one for rice and one for noodles. 113: The sky in Xuanwu District is sunny, and the people in Tongzhou District like it so much! Looking at Fengtai, I shouted loudly: I love you, Haidian! Yu Qian: OK! The King of Suburban County! 114: How are you? -Why is it you? How old are you? -Why is it always you? 115: Old man, please be civilized! 116:-I have good news and bad news, which one do you want to hear first? -What's the bad news? -We're lost. We'll probably have to live on cow dung from now on. -What's the good news? -There is plenty of cow dung! - Bang! ! ! 117: If I were a star in the sky, you would be the sun; if I were insulin, you would have high blood sugar; I am the Pleasant Goat, and you are the Big Big Wolf; I am the "Apple" and you are the "Lust, Caution"; I am the orange of Guangyuan, You are Sanlu's milk powder; I am Edison Chen... (I am not Cecilia Cheung) You are Nicholas Tse's son, called uncle... 118: Something happened in Yu Qian's family these days. (Lowers head) Their family~~The old man is gone! Hey, wasn't it just a few days ago? On December 30, 2006, he was hanged in the United States~~~ Yu Qian: "Wait a moment, that's Saddam, that's not my father" 119: Don't want to be a cook Tailors are not good soldiers! 120: Guo Degang: Are you strong enough to press (ya)? Yu Qian: Why do you curse? Guo Degang: This is in Shanghai. How can anyone understand this? 121: Guo Degang: I envy you! Guo Degang

Yu Qian: What are you envious of? Guo Degang: You know me at such a young age? ! 122: Guo Degang: Give me...yearly money! Yu Qian: Oh, it means "Ya" to me! 123: As soon as I entered the house, ha! Look at this old lady with fair hair and childish face, so energetic! She is sitting cross-legged on the kang, holding this book "Jin Ping Mei" in her hand... 124: There is a child who has been very close to his master since he was a child. This master is full of bad ideas. One day when I was teaching my children, I said: Boy, when you go home and see people’s families, don’t say anything else, just say to them, “I know the truth of the matter!” I’m sure it will benefit you. The kid learned. As soon as I saw his mother when I got home, I stepped forward and said: I know the truth of the matter. His mother's face turned pale when she heard this, and she quickly took out fifty yuan and gave it to the child, telling him: Baby, don't tell your dad, mom, just give her fifty yuan and take the flowers." After a while, she saw him again. He said again: I know the truth of the matter! After hearing this, his father took out two hundred and put it in the child's hand. He also told the child: Don't tell your mother! This child wants to get rich now! I've found a way to get rich. Everyone told me that I knew the truth. But one day when I saw the mail delivery person in front of their house, the boy came up and said, "I know the truth of the matter." When I heard it, I cried and said: My good son, daddy gives me a hug!” 125: Anyone who doesn’t know Yu Qian has never eaten pork. 126: Guo Degang: Bungee jumping, okay? Li Jing: That’s not okay, I’m afraid of water! Guo Degang: It doesn't matter if you're afraid of water. I'll grind a cement surface for you below. Li Jing: I'm jumping on the cement floor. Guo Degang: After polishing, we are afraid that children will step on some glass stubble to ensure your safety. Let’s tie a 500-meter rope to the 200-meter stalk. 127: You have to work hard when talking about cross talk. I'm sweating now. You see, people don't sweat. They maintain their "sweat". 128: If you are willing to die, I will be willing to bury you.

129: Carla is a dog. I wrote it. I plan to write another one. Yu Qian is a pig. 130: When big shots go out to buy tickets, they always ask: "Is there anyone from the Titanic?" Yu Qian: "Huo, this big shot is dead." 131: There are thousands of books in the three-foot dragon spring. What do I want from God? If I cannot serve the country and bring peace to the world, whose husband am I? Yu Qian: "What word are you talking about?" Guo Degang: "It's a Tang poem." Yu Qian: "Why is there such a thing as finding a wife in Tang poems?" 132: (Yu Qian's father) Let me introduce it to you! I was the one who introduced Yu Qian when he was making a tertiary film. 133: Let’s treat the director to dinner. The director said he wanted to eat simple Lanzhou cuisine. Yu Qian: “Lanzhou cuisine?” Guo Degang: “Wide strips and add meat.” 134: Be diligent. , I am just using the time that others drink coffee to drink beer. 135: I said that Kong Shengren was illiterate, I said that Zhuge Liang was a great dancer, and I said that Li Bai and Li Qingzhao have the same surname! Yu Qian: "Li Bai and Li Qingzhao, one man and one woman, can they be gay?" Guo Degang: "Both are named Li." 136: If you want to get rich, take off your pants first. 137: I was only 400 points away from going to Peking University. 138: These big girls One by one, the flesh is hidden and the flesh is revealed. 139: Formalin will be passed down forever. This bottle is yours. 140: Mr. Guo, please respect yourself. We only sell ourselves, not our art. 141: Having friends from far away is not enough for you. 142: Three-meter springboard, Wu Minxia was praised by Guo Jingjing. 143: Backward somersault for three and a half weeks and more than a month. 144: Everyone is familiar with getting married. It is a popular leisure activity for the general public. 145: There are first, second and third prizes in the tower climbing competition. The first prize is 50,000 yuan and the second prize is 70,000 yuan..... 146: My watch is very expensive. The original price is 350,000 yuan and the discount is 420 yuan... 147: Valentine’s Day is celebrated on February 14th. On this day, I went out with my lover and other people’s wives. (Other people’s wives? My own wife!) My own daughter-in-law left with someone else! ... 148: I was so angry that I scolded him severely: I'll get out of here. (Afraid of speaking in a hurry) 149: Your monthly salary is less than 1,500 yuan, so you can’t even think about supporting a female star. 150: Many images of heroes flashed before my eyes, including a senior official from Ximen and Mr. Chen (Edison Chen) who loves photography

151-200

151: Hello My name is Guo Degang, guess who I am? 152: Kong Shengren once said: All the good cabbage is given to the pigs. 153: Find a Go performing artist to perform for us. 154: Everyone is familiar with Go. The horse moves the sun, the elephant moves the field, and the army commander, eh, eh, Hu La... 155: My father is anxious and rolls up his sleeves: I will fight with you. 156: My sister-in-law has prostate discomfort. 157: I am a gangster and I will do things for you as long as you give me money. I will smash people's windows and throw shit. But you have to pay extra for throwing shit away. It feels different if you want to catch bricks and catch shit (Yu Qian: Your underworld is really dirty) 158: I pushed the door open and went in: I will collect a monthly protection fee from now on. "Go out and see where this (police station) is", I broke out in a cold sweat. (Yu Qian: It’s good enough that they let you out) 159; My fence is big, 20 miles on one side, the same length on all four sides, a big rectangle. 160: I am from the underworld, please take pity on me. 161: I stopped the woman walking on the road and was about to rob her. When I asked, I found out that she was a laid-off female worker. The more she talked about it, the more pitiful she became. In the end, I gave her five yuan. 162: Where she fell, she fell. Where to lie down 163: I especially hope that everyone will help me. If you give me some love, I will return your one-night stand. 164: I am not afraid of difficulties. There is no word "difficulty" in my dictionary. . . . . I don't have a dictionary. . . There is no word in my dictionary. 165: She picked up her slippers and hit me. Oh, you took me for a bush. 166: There are so many artists. Now when it rains, the artists along the wall will pop up. Artists all come out with shit, right? 167: The medicinal wine my grandfather made was very good. My second uncle drank it and died. Later, when the forensic autopsy report came out, it was said that the formula of the medicinal wine and arsenic was the same.

168: We have a lot of antiques in our house, including my uncle’s slippers, kimchi made by grandma, and the ashes of my second uncle. 169: I bought a few paintings by Tang Bohu, including beautiful landscapes, Fuwa, and a set of five... 170: I bought the big words written by Wang Xizhi: One World, One Dream. 171: I eat quickly, I deceive my stomach: you are full, you are full... Guo Degang

172: Don’t think that people with tattoos are all gangsters. Yue Fei also has tattoos. 173: When I was changing clothes in the car, someone was leaning against the window. Big girl, look at this. I’m worried. Do you always see people changing clothes like this? The woman replied, "Do you always change in other people's cars?" 174: It’s such a cold day and I have no clothes, so I’m wearing a plastic suit. 175: Wen Neng picks up his pen to bring peace to the world, and Wu Neng mounts his horse to make things right. He goes up to the kang and gets to know women, and when he gets off the kang, he knows his shoes. 176: Using a spit bucket for cooking is an innovation, but what the fuck? Who dares to eat it? 177: Today is like the seventh of July, when the divine bird meets a foreign chicken. 178: My uncle used to be a flight attendant. 179: In the past, you could only see your butt when you peeled off your swimsuit; now you can only see your swimsuit after you peel off your butt. Too vulgar.

180: Traveling through the time tunnel, the wires and stalks on both sides, swish, swish... 181: White Swan Band--I dare to blackmail you during the day. 182: Waiting for the Prime Minister--No one cares about waiting with a shovel. 183: The whole family Just a quilt, as big as a mask 184: You are a teacher, a professor 185: I am a superman! The only difference between me and Superman is that I wear my underwear inside! 186: 31 colors of ice cream in Brazzaville, Congo 187: I have my ambition - I want revenge 188: Put the evil on the cart, it is extremely evil; give the evil a pinch of salt, it will be evil