Love like an oak tree

What do you think a good love should look like? What kind of love do you expect?

I threw this question to three women I know. It happens that they all have one thing in common, they are all 1-3 years old and single.

A is a woman with good appearance, gentle and steady personality, sweet voice and elegant manners. As an only child, girls who grew up in such an environment are usually more mature. At first, I hated her for being a little delicate, but later I learned that she was soft outside and hard inside. We met on a trip. At that time, we made an appointment to travel together for a few days, eating and living together, so we also got a comprehensive understanding of her. That night in a hotel in Dunhuang, I opened the door when I came back from playing outside, and then I saw her, which brightened my eyes. Along the way, our driver, Brother Xiao Yang, took good care of her, helped her with her luggage, held her hand to keep her warm and asked her to eat in snowy days. I sometimes protest that he is deliberately eccentric. Brother Xiao Yang and his colleague's mother Wu privately discussed that a girl like A Ling is suitable for traveling alone because she is alert and can take care of herself. A, on the other hand, is defenseless against anyone and worrying (in other words, people want to take care of it). A word tells the difference between a woman like me and a princess like A. I think any man around her will want to take care of her. But she has been single for 30 years. When I asked her that question, I seemed to feel her disheartened across the screen. She said that she had stopped thinking about it, but in fact she had no confidence. I'm sorry. I think the man who can be with her in the end will be very happy, but he still keeps her waiting.

B is a woman I have known since my freshman year. She was divided into two classes in high school. She was the only classmate in one class in my high school for three years. Because of this fate, we two people with diametrically opposite personalities finally became old friends. B is chronic, indifferent, materialistic and rational. Other girls pay attention to the official account of WeChat, such as dressing up, skin care, makeup, entertainment and gossip, but they all pay attention to finance, economy, financial management, current affairs and politics. In recent years, they have begun to pay attention to Buddhism. In a word, a girl doesn't like anything she likes. Because she is so different from my girl friend, I subconsciously regard her as a neutral friend, and I never discuss dress matching or emotional issues with her when I get along with her. When I threw this question to her on a whim, I was expecting to receive a special answer. As a result, she said that love is too romantic, such as flowers in water and fog in the moon, which is unrealistic. A woman who is almost 30 years old has probably begun to make herself realistic, so at the end of 16, she paid a down payment for a single small apartment with the money she had saved for three years. Finally, if there is no love, at least I can point to others and say, I don't have a man, but I have a house.

C is my colleague. A very lively, cheerful and popular woman. Sometimes I admire her personality. Her personality is flamboyant, extroverted and careless. She is three years older than me and has reached the stage of "leftover women" defined by secular concepts. However, with the support of her parents, she has bought a house, made some investments herself, and the whole family is insured. Maybe she will occasionally feel confused about love in the dead of night, but what I see during the day is ruthless happiness. I said, I envy you this state, because with material backing, you have a great sense of security, less pressure, and you can live less troublesome. When I asked her this question, I guessed that I could get a more definite answer. Sure enough, she said, good love means that two people get along comfortably. When the bread is solved, love can be much purer.

Some time ago, there was a boy in the circle of friends, who was usually very low-key and had little dynamic. Suddenly, he sent a circle of friends. The picture shows a lovely girl. The short content is roughly that they have known each other for two years. The girl asked the boy to confess. So today, boys make girls public, which is a confession. I have been in contact with this boy several times, and I think he is a little bold and has a general impression, but this content makes me feel that he is very good and makes the audience feel very sweet. I asked my friend a with emotion, do you think we will meet a man who professes his love in the circle of friends in this life? A said, yes, I hope we can all meet such a beautiful love. I said, are you confident? A said, no confidence, but have confidence.

My childhood experience made me emotionally independent. I'm not afraid of loneliness, or even enjoy it. I like being alone and doing what I like. So, for me, love is icing on the cake, not a timely help. The love I yearn for should be as described in Shu Ting's poem "To the Oak Tree": If I love you, I will never show off myself with your high branches like climbing Campbell flowers. I must be a kapok beside you, standing with you in the image of a tree, and we will share the cold wave, storm and thunderbolt together; We share the mist and rainbow, as if we are separated forever, but we are dependent on each other for life. Whenever I reread this poem, I will be moved by it. Good love should be two people standing side by side, keeping pace and growing together. If you have such love in your lifetime, you will be very lucky.

The way I expect to meet love is that two people are attracted to each other because they like the same thing, meet in the vast sea of people, smile at each other and know that they are the same kind of people. Maybe this is a bit idealistic, but there are many aspects of life that are desperate. Only by allowing yourself to fantasize occasionally can people have faith and believe that there are still beautiful things waiting for them.

I remember 12 traveling in Shanghai alone. There are many small shops decorated in the old Shanghai style in the street near Chenghuang Temple. I took pictures there with my camera, and the streets were bustling and crowded with people. When taking pictures, I must be careful not to run into people around me. Then I looked up and found a tall boy standing next to me. He was also taking pictures with a SLR. Looks a lot like Shawn Yue. But I have no feelings for Shawn Yue, so I don't care. After a short stroll in Chenghuang Temple, I took a bus to Tianzifang, a literary paradise. After visiting all kinds of creative shops in the alley until night falls, I am a little tired of the crowded people and eager to leave because of cold and fatigue. Just as I turned left and right to the alley exit to avoid pedestrians, in the twilight, I found a deja vu figure taking pictures in a deja vu posture at the fork in the main driveway. I hurried past his lens, and then in the dim light, I turned around and saw him stand up straight, put down the camera and looked at me. I remember "Shawn Yue". Maybe he was a little surprised to see me here. Then I hurried away. Although nothing happened, I always remember this episode. Maybe I think romantic love should happen like this, because they have the same hobbies and tastes, and finally they walk together under the magical arrangement of fate. However, the love of most of us is common. At that time, we will end the last romantic idea by introducing friends or dating, and then walk into the reality of daily necessities.

Sometimes I feel that my personality is too angular, not enthusiastic, not gentle and inconsiderate, and I feel that I have too many shortcomings. Sometimes I suspect that I don't seem to deserve too good love, otherwise other people's love always comes so easily, but I miss it. At this stage, I am too used to being comfortably alone. If I really meet love, I don't even have confidence, and I can bring happiness to each other on my own. I have been doing self-reflection and thinking about making myself better and cuter. However, what I hope more is to meet a tolerant person. Even if he is angular, flawed and bad-tempered, he will still turn around and wait for me at the street corner.

I don't know how it will end. Time will tell.