"A blessing" is to be glad that we are honest with each other.

Zhao Xun is getting married and invited me to her wedding.

I was collecting the news in an unknown town in the south when Ayao told me the news by phone. Spring is strong in March, but there is nothing new in the countryside.

Yao is my husband, and I am a freelance photographer.

Zhao Xun was my good friend in college.

Hung up the phone, walked into a small village shop on the side of the road, put the camera on a paper towel and put it on a slightly greasy desktop. I sat on the wooden bench and began to think about my immature college days.

In my impression, the relationship between Zhao Xun and I seems to be very close, and always seems to have some unspeakable alienation. Intimacy is because the same love for photography makes us talk about everything, and alienation is because all meaningful conversations between us always seem to be inspired and ended only in photography. Besides, there are few others.

When I was in college, we also organized a poor travel photography club together. There is no doubt that she has her own unique understanding of photography and has become the head of the club. The camera she uses is not high-end, and among the many high-quality cameras in the club, she can only squeeze into the middle and lower classes. But with this entry-level camera, she can always shoot the best works among us.

Frankly speaking, this alone makes me jealous.

The Excellence of her works is not from the purely technical level, but more from her distinctive personal style-whether it is a landscape photo or a portrait, she can always easily capture an unknown characteristic of an object and expose it in front of the camera. Just as she can photograph the decay buried in colorful cities and the vitality nurtured in the fiery rural customs, she can also photograph the melancholy colors inadvertently revealed on the faces of glamorous people and the bright spots in the lives of lonely souls.

What her works show has always been the most easily overlooked and hidden thing in this ordinary world. When I told her this discovery, she said irrefutably that it was for this reason that many models she liked refused her invitation to take photos-who would want to easily expose what she had painstakingly hidden to others?

After so long, I almost lost contact with Zhao Xun.

What surprised me was not that she remembered me as a lost friend, but that the first thing that came to mind after I received the invitation was not Zhao Xun's thin face with personal characteristics, but what she said to me when she was drunk because of lovelorn in college one night.

She told me that she might never get married.

"Because I talked about a complete love, and marriage is just an insurance burial of love. In the love that just ended, I have experienced all kinds of tastes of love, and I really don't think it is necessary to do it again. I won't regret it, let alone regret it. For most things in this world, my attitude is that once is enough. Besides photography, I think the only thing I will love in my life is photography. "

I still remember when she said these words, her expression and tone were very calm, as if she was just evaluating the works of a junior in a community with her usual tone.

It is such a woman who once said that she would never get married. Now, under the irresistible trend of time, she has broken her original promise to herself. Outside the store, trucks sped by, and smoke billowed on the passable road, as if this world that eats people and doesn't spit bones declared its sovereignty over such a blessed world. In the smoke, the little brother in the shop came to me, and the beef kway teow I ordered was finally ready.

What kind of people will such an excellent Zhao Xun be entrusted to?

And what kind of state is the photography career she insists on now?

These are all my inner questions, and I think I should look at the answers. I sincerely hope that she can find happiness hidden in this secular world like her previous photos.

2

After filming in a small town in the south, I came home and sent several groups of satisfactory works to a cooperative magazine, and my recent work was over. The vacancy coincided with Zhao Xun's wedding date.

Release the mouse, look up at the clock, only to find that it is nearly two o'clock in the morning, Zhao Xun's invitation has been lying beside the computer, and a white ribbon is tied on the blue-purple Cambodian letter. I opened this invitation again and studied the words "Chen Pingsheng" printed next to "Zhao Xun".

There is no doubt that that is the groom's name.

I have heard the phrase "name is the shortest curse", so for a moment, I tried to guess the groom's image through the "short curse" of the word "Chen Pingsheng", and finally I could only draw an inconspicuous conclusion. However, if the names of two independent individuals, Chen Pingsheng and Zhao Xun, are regarded as a whole, they seem to be cursed by a connection when they are solemnly and formally printed on this flat paper. You came into my life, and this world will never be separated.

From "Chen Pingsheng" to "Zhao Xun", I suddenly remembered something, rummaged through the computer disk for a while, and finally found a folder named "On the Alaska Ice Sheet".

This is a set of photos sent to me by Zhao Xun several years ago.

When I first received her email, I was shocked at how a girl had so much courage to go deep into the arctic cold area like Alaska to take pictures. However, when I opened the photos of those peerless masterpieces, every shot that recorded the magnificent wonders of nature gave me a greater shock. Even if you appreciate it now, the shock from life at the beginning is still undiminished.

Alaska ice sheet, a place where humans rarely set foot, is one of the few last pure lands on the earth. The vast time has hardly left any obvious traces there. The scenery thousands of years ago is still what Zhao Xun saw in those days.

Located on the snowfield are still snow-capped mountains and slowly moving glaciers. I don't know how many years the frozen reindeer bones have been lying forever in this vast land. In cold weather, migratory birds migrate north and south with the monsoon. Humpback whales at sea set off waves when chasing fish. Grizzly bears and gray wolves in the snow are tired of hunting for survival ... No matter how big or small, life in this land has been seeking its own way of survival in the laws of nature for thousands of years.

The most primitive face of a life, through her photos, is so clearly presented to all audiences, natural, barbaric, frank and undisguised.

Such an excellent work, not surprisingly, won the prize of National Geographic magazine, and Zhao Xun was once famous in the circle. However, since then, I have rarely heard of her fame. Although I occasionally see her works and her name in some magazines, it seems that all the discussions in the world have come to an end with the storm.

"For most things in this world, I hold the attitude that once is enough", and this sentence that she said suddenly came to my mind.

Immersed in the memories of the past, there was a sudden cry in the kitchen.

Only then did I realize that Yao was still awake.

I closed the page of picture browsing, walked to the door of the kitchen and watched him pour steaming noodles into the bowl. I said to him, "it's clumsy to cook a noodle and eat it on fire."

He gave me a wronged look, put the bowl on the table and called me over.

I sat down conveniently, eating noodles with the same taste as before, and watching him sitting opposite me was inexplicably moved.

A sense of satisfaction from a moment.

three

I arrived in G City one day early because Zhao Xun invited me to a bachelor party held the night before her wedding.

Many years later, I saw Zhao Xun again. Obviously, she is not as thin as she used to be, but she is still slender. A blue dress that touches the land and lakes, simple and exquisite, makes the whole person colorful.

It is really Zhao Xun!

Just standing there with a glass in one hand, she is still the special one in the crowd.

The so-called bachelor party is more like an exhibition of her works.

There are many high and low orderly supports at the party site. Zhao Xun's old works are placed on the bracket, and the shooting date is written in the lower right corner of each pair with a marker, which is obviously the result of careful selection. At first glance, the placement of these photos seems to be out of order, but when I slowly approached the center of the party, I found that I was wrong-how could a person like Zhao Xun allow his photos to be displayed out of order-as space advances from the outside and the mainland, the time of photos also appears from far to near.

Most of the periphery is old. I even saw a few paintings of her heart when I was in college. The further you go inside, the more you see many works that you have never seen before. It was in the middle that the work "On the Alaska Ice Sheet" appeared. Going forward should be all her shooting achievements in recent years.

Only a dozen paces away from Zhao Xun's residence. Strangely, I was not in a hurry to say hello to her, but was first attracted by her works in recent years.

On the pages of different sizes, there are countless secular scrolls: old people and children wandering at home; Young people running buses; The embers left by firecrackers in the countryside during the New Year; Abandoned in the back of the building, several used condoms; Eggbeater with residual egg liquid; Eat the remaining watermelon skin; A featureless street view; lame duck—be unsuccessful/helpless/useless ......

The theme of those photos can only be described in many ways. At first glance, people can't find any place to connect with each other. But when I saw one pair after another, I gradually found an obvious change-if "on the Alaska ice sheet" is the dividing line, then the object she photographed seems to be gradually developing into daily life over time.

If in the early days, she preferred to shoot some grand themes and look for things that were ignored and covered up by people in the grand themes, then in the later period, she gradually fell into the most daily life for some reason. Abandoning the tortuous exposure in the past, I turned to present the most frank life picture in daily life in the most direct way.

Actually, I should have seen it. The photo of On the Alaska Ice Sheet has already appeared.

Land not covered by industrial buildings is more primitive than rural areas. Those unpretentious life and natural scenery are the truest presentation of this world. As you can imagine, it is natural for Zhao Xun to end such a photographic journey that touches the depths of his soul and turn his style to the frankness of life.

The reason why she sent the photos to me specially is probably a move by her to tell me the news.

Thought of here, I suddenly some surprise, and some relief, which also mixed with a trace of sadness.

I am surprised by the change of her style, gratified by her trust in me, and saddened by her mediocrity and cowardice.

A clear footstep came to me, and Zhao Xun put down his glass and came to me.

"Come? Why don't you say hello to me? "

She stood there, smiling and opening her hands to me. Her eyes are beautiful, honest and clear.

This is Zhao Xun, Zhao Xun as always.

I reached out my hands in response to her hug: "I was attracted by your masterpiece."

four

"It's too noisy outside. Let's talk somewhere else. "

Say that finish, Zhao Xun took my hand and took me to an elegant room.

As soon as she entered the door, she closed the door and began to act on a beautiful porcelain tea tray.

We often had tea together in college. After so many years, she still remembers that I love the fragrance of tea, and the skill of cooking tea is as good as ever. Soon, she poured two cups of clear orange tea soup on the plate and pushed one of them to me.

Picking up the teacup, I asked, "Long time no see, what have you been busy with these years?"

I haven't seen her for a long time. I know nothing about her later experience, so I can only ask about it from the recent situation first. The tea soup is fresh and hot, so you can't eat it for the time being.

She smiled at me: "As before, I was busy taking pictures. What about you? "

I am a little embarrassed to answer her: "After all, it is something I love, and I can't give up. After graduation, I have been continuing my photography work, but I am not as enterprising as you, running around just to find a new realm. For photography, I am more and more like a task, cooperating with magazines, contributing to newspapers and holding some small personal exhibitions, but after all, it is for life and livelihood. "

She listened thoughtfully, avoided the topic and asked me instead, "Are you married?"

I took a sip of tea soup and smiled and said, "I have been married for three years."

She picked up the teacup, smiled cunningly, and suddenly looked me in the eye: "Why wasn't I invited?"

Those honest eyes seem to want to see through my heart.

I just remembered that when I was writing the invitation, I hesitated for a long time. I was going to invite her, but we hadn't contacted each other for a long time at that time. After much thinking, we couldn't finish writing her name on the invitation. Now that I think about it, in addition to the gradual thinning of the relationship that I thought at that time, I actually brought some unspeakable reasons for the comparison.

I am not obsessed with explanation, and sincerely apologize to her: "I'm sorry, it's my fault."

She seems to know the reason very well, and she is not obsessed with it. She only drinks tea soup in a cup.

I also drink tea soup in the cup.

Remembering that I haven't seen the groom yet, I asked her.

"His bachelor party and I were held separately. I invited my friend and he invited his friend. " Zhao Xun said easily, busy adding new tea.

I'm a little surprised. Why do two people who are going to swear to spend the rest of their lives together hold separate bachelor parties on the eve of their wedding?

Seeing my doubts, she made tea and explained to me, "This is normal. He has his life, I have my life, and the circles on both sides are different. There is no need to work hard for the beauty of the scene. "

"Do you get along well in life?" I asked.

She pushed the tea soup in front of me again and replied, "Yes, it makes us both feel comfortable."

"Can you tell me something about your future groom?" I relaxed and leaned back on the sofa: "You once told me that it was enough for you to hold an attitude towards love once. I am curious, what kind of person can make you change your attitude? " I have made up my mind to hear her description of my future groom.

She glanced at me, lay down with a perceptible smile and began to describe: "He is the editor-in-chief of a photography magazine in China. We met in a business cooperation a few years ago. He is an activist. As soon as he saw me, he expressed his appreciation for my work very frankly and soon began to pursue me. Not many people know my photographic soul. You are one of them, so is he. After trying to communicate for a period of time, I found that his idea of photography is different from mine. Not only can he always see what my works want to express at a glance, but he can always give me some very interesting suggestions in depth. I have to admit that under his guidance, I entered a new realm of photography. The group of works I sent you a few years ago was completed on the Alaska ice sheet with his encouragement and company. I did say-for most things in this world, I have an attitude that once is enough-but his appearance made me find that love is not a mediocre one-off proposition. Every time we discuss it in depth, our ideas will collide with new sparks. In a sense, our combination can be regarded as a mutually promoting relationship, which can constantly create a new round of surprises for each other. You have just seen my later works. Have you found any changes in me? "

I drank a second cup of cold tea and truthfully stated, "I became extremely honest."

She said happily, "It was he who made me discover that a truth that exists in the truth is different from the mask I tried to cover up before. This is the true face of a frank and touching life. "

"I can see that you really love him, and he must love you." I blurted it out.

"I love him just like my photography, and he loves me just like my photography." She answered.

Looking at her determined eyes, I was a little worried: "Have you ever thought about whether he loves you as a person or just your photography?"

She smiled: "I asked him a similar question. I said, if I am not a good photographer, will you still love me? He was embarrassed. After a while, he replied that our love and our final career were mixed. I don't want to lie to you, so I can only say that I don't know. "

"So, what's your reaction?" I can't wait to ask.

At this moment, her face was filled with incomparable happiness: "I am very touched. Maybe I will change, but I will never change my insistence on photography. "

Looking at her happy expression, the stone in my heart seemed to fall to the ground in an instant.

It turns out that not only unconditional love can move people, but also conditional love can move people, and this kind of love is more pure than the secular.

She asked me to think about it and quietly poured me a third cup of tea.

five

The next day, I attended Zhao Xun's wedding as promised.

At the wedding, I finally met Chen Pingsheng himself.

Jun Qing is polite, gentle and generous. At the moment, he is holding Zhao Xun's hand gently, standing on the brand-new red carpet to accept the priest's congratulations. In the eyes, it is as clear as Zhao Xun.

I am different from Yao, Chen Pingsheng is different from Yao, so our lives are naturally different. But there is no difference between good and bad, just mutual choice. I'm glad that we have found the right person for each other and have a reliable colleague on the long road of life.

When the fireworks were in full bloom, Chen gave Zhao Xun a gentle kiss on the cheek, and my heart began to miss Yao.

Yao who secretly cooked noodles for me in the middle of the night.