Einstein's humorous stories

Einstein, the great champion of physics, is an idol-level and absolute strength master admired by the whole people. Masters are plain and amiable, because a person can become a master precisely because he has let go of himself, and if he has let go of himself and integrated into Heaven, it will be full of fun and humor will naturally stand out in daily life. Let's take a look at Einstein's witty humor.

1. True and false drivers

Einstein, a great physicist, is famous for putting forward the theory of relativity. Since then, such a story has happened.

Einstein, a famous man, is busy asking him to give lectures in countless universities every day, which makes him exhausted! Every time Einstein goes to college, Richard, a full-time driver, drives him. As soon as he arrived at the meeting, Richard listened to the speech from the audience. He has been an audience for 30 times and listened attentively from beginning to end every time.

Richard is an interesting American. One day, he made a suggestion to exhausted Einstein:

"You are too hard, you must be tired to talk. I can remember the content of your speech. I'll wear your clothes for the next speech, and let me speak for you until I'm found, okay? "

"Great, there are not many people who know me there anyway." Einstein, who is also full of wit, replied. After that speech, Richard wore Einstein's clothes and made no mistakes in explaining the theory of relativity. He also vividly imitated Einstein's expressions and movements. Dressed as a driver, Ai not only drove Richard to the lecture, but also sat under the stage and listened carefully.

However, just at the end of the speech and Richard was about to step down, an unexpected thing finally happened. A professor-looking gentleman stood up and asked a lot of questions in rapid succession. Really Einstein sat quietly in the corner of the venue, surprised, but his expression was as if nothing had happened. The fake Einstein said to the professor easily, "Your question is so simple that even my driver can answer it ... Hey, Richard, come up and help me explain!" " "

Then, the real Einstein went to the podium and quickly explained the problem!

2. Humorous theory of relativity

On one occasion, a group of young students surrounded Einstein and moved to his residence in the United States from Germany, asking him to explain his theory of relativity clearly in "the simplest words".

At that time, it was said that only a few scientists in the world could understand his work on the theory of relativity. Einstein walked out of the house and said to these young people, "For example, you are sitting by the fire with a beautiful girl. An hour has passed, as if it had only been five minutes! " ! On the other hand, you only sat by the hot stove for five minutes, but you seemed to sit for an hour. Well, this is the theory of relativity! "

3. People with smart impressions laugh at themselves

Einstein once married a young friend. A few years later, the couple came to see him with their youngest son. The child burst into tears as soon as he saw Einstein, which embarrassed the couple. Humorous Einstein touched the child's head and said happily, "You are the first person who is willing to tell me my impression in person."

4. An old coat

One day, Einstein met a friend in the street of new york.

"Mr Einstein," said the friend, "it seems necessary for you to buy a new coat. Look how old this one is on you! "

"What does this have to do? Nobody knows me in new york anyway, "Einstein replied.

A few years later, they met again by chance. By this time, Einstein had become a famous physicist, but he still wore that coat. His friend took great pains to persuade him to put on a new coat.

"Why bother!" He said, "Everyone here knows me anyway."

5. The story of the banquet

Einstein attended a formal banquet in his honor. All the male guests wore ties, and all the female guests wore strapless dresses.

His wife didn't attend because of a cold. When she saw Einstein coming home, she hurriedly asked about the party. So Einstein told her which famous scientists were present tonight.

His wife interrupted him and asked, "Never mind. Tell me what the ladies are wearing? " "I really don't know," Einstein answered seriously. "Judging from the part above the table, they are wearing nothing. And I dare not peek under the table. "

I have a good memory.

When Einstein gave a speech in America, someone asked, "Do you remember the speed of sound? How do you write down a lot of things? "

Einstein easily replied, "What is the speed of sound? I have to look it up in the dictionary to answer. Because I never remember what was printed in the dictionary, my memory is used to remember what is not in the book. "

7. Laugh and criticize

1930, Germany published a book criticizing the theory of relativity, entitled "One hundred professors come forward to prove Einstein wrong".

Hearing the news, Einstein shrugged and said, "100 people? Why so many people? As long as I can prove that I am really wrong, even one person is enough. "

8. Ownership of nationality

In 1930s, Einstein gave a speech at the University of Paris, saying, "If my theory of relativity is proved, Germany will declare me a German and France will call me a citizen of the world. However, if my theory proves to be wrong, then France will emphasize that I am German and Germany will say that I am Jewish. " (Koreans say: Don't argue, Einstein's ancestral home is South Korea)

9. Professional model

Shaggy white hair and wrinkled face. A bushy beard and a pair of dark brown eyes-this is the image of Einstein left by the artist.

Einstein was gentle and kind, and never had the heart to refuse the demands of photographers, painters and sculptors. However, he spent a lot of time dealing with the endless stream of artists and posing as they needed.

Once, a casual guest asked about his occupation, and he replied without thinking: "professional model!" " "

10. Get lost

One day, the telephone of the director's office of Kingston Institute for Advanced Studies suddenly rang. The female secretary picked up the receiver and heard the voice on the phone: "Can you tell me where Dr. Einstein lives?" The secretary replied that she couldn't say it because she wanted to respect Dr. Einstein's wishes and he didn't want his residence to be disturbed. Then the voice on the phone dropped to a whisper and said, "Please don't tell anyone that I am Einstein. I'm going home, but I can't find my home. " It turned out that Einstein came back from a scientific seminar, absorbed in the discussion, and unconsciously lost his way (just arrived at Princeton).

1 1. Make love on the ice

One day, Einstein slipped on the ice and fell to the ground.

People around him picked him up and said, "Mr Einstein, according to the principle of relativity, you didn't fall, did you? Only when the earth suddenly tilted? "

Einstein said, "Sir, I agree with you, but the two theories feel the same to me."

12. Success formula

A young man who likes talking nonsense but doesn't like studying hard pesters Einstein to reveal the secret of success. Einstein was bored, so he wrote him a formula: a = x+y+z y+z.

Einstein explained: "A stands for success, X stands for hard work, and Y stands for the correct method."

"What does Z stand for?" The young man asked eagerly.

"stands for less nonsense." Einstein said.

13. memorize numbers skillfully

A friend of Einstein called him.

Finally, she asked Einstein to write down her phone number so that we could talk later. "My phone number is very long and difficult to remember."

"Go ahead, I'm listening." Einstein didn't pick up the pen.

"2436 1。"

"What's hard to remember?" Einstein said, "I remember the squares of twenty and nineteen."

14. reptile beetle

Edward, Einstein's second son, asked him, "Dad, why on earth did you become a famous person?"

Einstein laughed at first, and then said meaningfully, "Look, the beetle is crawling on a sphere. It doesn't realize that its path is curved, but I can realize it." What did you learn from this seemingly ordinary but thought-provoking sentence? )

15. Big wastebasket

Princeton University will give Einstein 1 10,000 dollars as a professor. On the day when Einstein was taken to the office of Princeton University, someone asked him what tools he needed.

"I think a desk, a chair and some paper and pens will do. Oh, yes, and a big wastebasket. " He said.

"Why is it big?"

"So I can throw all my mistakes in."

Time and eternity.

Once, an American female reporter visited Einstein and asked, "In your opinion, what is the difference between time and eternity?"

Einstein replied: "dear lady, if I have time to explain the difference between them, then when you understand, eternity will disappear!" " "

17. reputation of cold versus heat

At a ball specially held for Einstein, "celebrities" all over the United States praised and touted him endlessly, making him fidgety.

When disgusting flattery escalated into hot nonsense, Einstein couldn't stand it any longer. He patted the sofa, stood up and said, "Thank you! If I believe these compliments are sincere, I should be crazy. Because I know I'm not crazy, I don't believe it, and I don't want to hear your disgusting praise again! "

18. Placebo

Einstein was seriously ill in his later years, which seriously affected his daily life and physical research.

And with the passage of time, his condition gradually deteriorated.

The doctor is very worried about his illness and always pays attention to his health, for fear that something will go wrong. After all, it is not ordinary people who take care of themselves. He is the greatest scientist in the 20th century!

However, Einstein didn't care much about his illness. He believes that birth, aging, illness and death are the natural laws of life. No matter you are an ordinary person or a celebrity, no one can escape this natural law. Instead of worrying about it, it is better to spend more time on more meaningful things and look at it with a normal heart and a calm heart.

So his enthusiasm for cooperation with doctors is not high. He often ignores the doctor's advice and sometimes even forgets to take medicine. Once, after the doctor checked his condition, he made some medicine, told him to take it at once and watched him take it.

Although Einstein didn't care much, he took the medicine obediently. Seeing the doctor relieved, he said to the doctor, "Doctor, do you feel better now?"

World War IV.

Someone once asked Einstein: Do you know how to fight if there is a third world war? Einstein replied: I don't know, but I know that World War IV must have been fought with stones and sticks.

20. The shortest distance

When Einstein was teaching at Princeton University, he gave a short and interesting speech at the end of the summer vacation.

At that time, students asked Einstein if he had made any new academic discoveries, so he had to announce impromptu: "I have a discovery: the shortest distance between two points refers to the beginning of summer vacation to the end of summer vacation." I wish you a happy summer vacation! "

Conclusion: Einstein's achievements and great personality are due to his humility and high selflessness. Every leap in the history of human thought and civilization is driven by the enlightened, and only the enlightened can get out of the narrow self and gain insight into the mystery of Daewoo, and only the enlightened can do it.

Open the bright life of the soul of all things. As Einstein said, life really begins when you step out of your narrow self. An enlightened person is bound to laugh at everything without clinging, and it is precisely because of enlightenment that the light inside and outside will give birth to infinite wisdom, which comes from the brain and is low-level and limited; And wisdom comes from the mind, which is bright and infinite.

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