Super detailed engagement guide: 10 tasks to complete the engagement ceremony, plus detailed tips!

When you accept a romantic proposal, you have not yet climbed out of the emotional whirlpool. What follows is reality - there are various hurdles to overcome before entering the auditorium. This time, we will introduce the first stage of marriage, "engagement".

Engagement, also known as "the joy of engagement," is a ceremony where couples make a lifelong commitment to each other before the wedding banquet. Although many couples choose to do both engagement and marriage at the same time, there are still many couples who are very Pay attention to the engagement ceremony, especially if the man and woman come from different cities. It is even more necessary to hold the engagement ceremony and the wedding ceremony separately, so that relatives and friends from each other's cities can participate and give blessings nearby.

Okay, without further ado, let’s take a look at the level of engagement and what tasks need to be solved!

Mission 1_Departure

After worshiping the ancestors at home, the man fills the betrothal gift in a "mahogany box" and then goes to the bride's house by firing a cannon. It should be noted that the number of passengers in the limo should be an even number, but in order to avoid unlucky numbers such as "4, 8", the number of limo cars is usually 2 or 6.

Task 2＿Welcome

When the groom’s limo arrives 50 meters in front of the bride’s house, a cannon is fired to notify the bride’s family that the groom is approaching, and the woman must also fire. Cannon welcomes. When the reception car is parked, the matchmaker should get off first, and the groom should get off last. A junior member of the woman's family (usually a male) should open the door for the groom, and the groom should give a red envelope to the junior member.

Task 3_Acceptance

The man’s relatives and friends carry the bride price to the woman’s house. After accepting the bride price, the woman’s family will give red envelopes to the bridegroomers. After the betrothal gifts are arranged neatly, the matchmaker will hand over the betrothal gifts such as large and small betrothal gifts, gold jewelry, etc. to the woman.

Task 4_Introduce relatives and friends of both parties

Although the parents of both parties have almost met before the engagement, the matchmaker will still introduce relatives and friends of both parties to each other on the wedding day. Usually, they will first The man’s relatives and friends introduce him to the woman, who then introduces the woman’s relatives and friends to the man.

Task 5＿Serve sweet tea

The bride’s parents will ask the groom’s relatives and friends to sit according to their seniority. The oldest person will sit at the front, and the groom will sit at the back. After everyone is seated, the woman's good fortune will lead the bride out and serve the prepared sweet tea. The amount of sweet tea should be the same as the number of the man's relatives and friends seated, no more or less; when the bride serves the tea, the cup should be held firmly and not shaken. , at this time, the lucky lady will say some auspicious words beside her, and the bride will go back to the room first after serving the sweet tea.

Task 6_ Press the tea pot

After the groom’s relatives and friends have finished drinking the sweet tea, they roll up the red envelopes prepared in advance and put them into the cup. Then the lucky lady will lead the bride out and follow the instructions The tea cups are taken back in sequence, and the groom's relatives and friends will say some auspicious words to congratulate the bride. This ceremony is called "pressing the tea cup (ㄡ)".

Task 7_Wearing the Ring

After the tea pot pressing ceremony, the lucky lady will lead the bride back to the room (yes, the bride is always coming in and out~). At this time It is necessary to prepare a high chair and a low chair. When the lucky lady brings the bride out, the bride should sit on the high chair "facing outward" with her feet on the low chair. Then, when the couple puts on the ring, the matchmaker will read some auspicious words beside them. The groom will first help the bride put the ring on the middle finger, because it has the meaning of "pressing it to the bottom". During the process, the bride bends her finger to avoid being " "Eat to death" means; when it is the bride's turn to put the ring on the groom's middle finger, she politely wears it to the second knuckle.

Task 8_Meeting Ceremony

The mother-in-law will put on the gold necklace, bracelet, etc. for the bride, and then the mother-in-law will put on the gold necklace for the groom; after wearing the engagement ring, the couple can change their names. Relatives and friends, for example, calling each other's parents "Dad, Mom". This change of title means that the two parties are married and can continue to carry out ancestor worship in the woman's family.

Task 9＿Return to betrothal

After accepting the betrothal gift from the man, the woman will also give the man a gift in return. This ceremony is called "return to betrothal (pressure betrothal)". The steps are to first take out the man's betrothal gift, and then put the woman's gift into the empty box of the man's dowry gift. The bride will also prepare in advance the groom's personal belongings from head to toe, commonly known as the "head-to-toe gift", and give the groom's gift. For example, the woman usually only receives a small betrothal gift, and the big betrothal gift is returned to the man.

Task 10_Better Banquet

After the engagement ceremony is completed, the woman will host a "Better Banquet". The man's relatives and friends will not eat until the end. According to the custom, the man will leave the dinner with fish. When leaving, he will give a red envelope as a thank you gift (also known as the "table ceremony"). The woman will prepare chicken legs tied with red paper and a red envelope for the man's juniors. .

(My kind reminder: Don’t say "goodbye" when seeing off guests! Avoid the connotation of remarriage; in addition, if the man does not eat to the end, it means that he will not "eat enough" for the bride in the future. Yo~)

After completing the above 10 tasks, congratulations on completing the engagement ceremony! In fact, if you follow the process, you will find that the engagement ceremony is not difficult at all, right? What? Still don’t understand something? Don’t worry, I’ve prepared some tips to help you pass the level faster!

Tip 1_What are the taboos in getting engaged?

Taboo 1: Female elders whose titles include "aunt, sister-in-law" are not suitable to enter the bride's room, because the pronunciation is the same as "Gu, sweep".

Taboo 2: Usually wedding-related ceremonies are taboo for people born in the year of the tiger. The traditional concept is that tigers are violent and conflict with happy events.

Taboo 3: The bride-to-be is not allowed to eat her own wedding cake, because it means that the bride will marry again (except for tasting).

Tip 2_What is the difference between "serving tea" at the engagement ceremony and "eating tea" on the wedding day?

In traditional customs, serving tea has always been a ceremony for younger generations to show respect to their elders. It is hoped that the bride will use the tea ceremony to let the elders in the groom's family know each other and leave a good impression. I hope to be loved by the elders in the future; at this time, the elders also need to show their proper bearing and dignity, and prepare red envelopes to express their feelings to the bride after drinking tea, which is the "pressing the tea pot" mentioned in task 6 above. ”.

Drinking tea on the wedding day is more of a southern custom (it depends on each family in modern times whether they have this custom), also known as "bridal tea". It means that after the bride gets married and the banquet is over, she becomes the hostess of the groom's family. Therefore, relatives and friends of the groom's family will come to give gifts, congratulations, and give red envelopes. The bride also needs to serve tea to entertain visiting relatives and friends. Most of the people sitting there are elders (maybe only parents-in-law), and red envelopes should also be prepared for the bride. Generally speaking, the bride does not need to reciprocate the red envelopes received during the engagement tea; but the bride must reciprocate the red envelopes received during the wedding tea to her parents-in-law~

Tip 3_ How should I walk/sit during the engagement ceremony?

If you have not arranged in advance how the elders should sit and how the bride should move, it may make people feel confused, and the bride’s elders may also feel embarrassed because of this, so the walking route and seating order are the same. vital.

There are usually three types of places where engagement ceremonies are held: the bride’s own living room, a wedding banquet hall, and a hotel room. No matter which location you choose, as long as you grasp three key points, you can make the ceremony go smoothly!

Point 1: The groom serves tea and the elders are seated according to their seniority. No matter how many there are, the groom must sit at the end. The number of people is mainly an even number.

Point 2: The bride serves tea in order of generation. In addition to holding the tea carefully on the day, it is inevitably difficult to walk in a dress, so the main thing is to allow the bride to walk in a smooth route, and do not go back and forth or Cross walk.

Point 3: Most couples will hire professional photographers to record the ceremony. If the space is narrow and there is no place reserved for the photographer to take pictures, it will not only make the photographer's work difficult, but also difficult. Makes for beautiful photos, so when setting up your ceremony location, be sure to leave room for the photographer. It is recommended that you discuss the process with the photographer before the ceremony starts on the day, including the lighting, angles and movement lines of the shooting. The photographer will give feedback to the newcomers and elders on how to best position themselves from a professional perspective.

Tip 4_What should I prepare for betrothal gifts and return gifts?

Betrothal gifts are divided into "six gifts" and "twelve gifts". Nowadays, the "six gifts" are the main ones. Among them, the man pays the amount of cake money ordered by the woman.

In addition, the bride price that the man needs to prepare is divided into small and large betrothals. The market price for small betrothal is usually 120,000 to 160,000, and the price for large betrothal is 360,000 to 660,000. However, most of the modern bride's families only accept small betrothal and then large betrothal, and some do not accept the dowry. , provided for the reference of newlyweds

Six gifts for men

1. Big cake (Chinese wedding cake)

2. Box cake (also known as wedding cake) , which are general Western-style gift cakes or simple Han cakes)

3. Four colors (gold, incense, cannons, candles, used for worshiping ancestors)

4. Six sweets (winter melon candy , ring cakes, orange cakes, longans, rock sugar, and sugar candies, symbolizing sweetness)

5. Four golds (gold jewelry for the bride, including earrings, necklaces, bracelets, and rings)

6. Head and tail rites (6 or 12 pieces of clothing given to the bride, symbolizing wealth, wealth and good luck)

Twelve rites for the man (including the above six rites)

7. Two dozen red wines (representing peace and tranquility in the 24 solar terms of the year)

8. Pork or ham (representing abundance and sincerity)

9. Noodles (symbolizing the marriage of two surnames, a thread of a happy marriage) )

10. Glutinous rice and sugar (let the woman make glutinous rice balls, symbolizing reunion and happiness)

11. Capon and duck mother (indicating starting a business)

12. Happy flowers (symbolizing good luck)

The woman’s return gift

1. Two pieces of gold (a necklace and ring for the groom)

2. First and last gifts (6 or 12 pieces of clothing for the groom)

3. The groom prepares 4 box cakes, large cakes, four colors and six sweets as return gifts

Twelve rites for the woman (including the above six rites)

7. Charcoal (represents continuation and inheritance)

8. Wheat and grain (symbolizes adequate food and clothing)

9. Brown sugar (sweet mouth, lovable)

10. Money and lead (connection with husband’s family)

11. Belly (meaning great ambitions) )

12. Lotus banana flowers and taro leaves (meaning many children and grandchildren)

The above is the detailed process of Wedding Joy and the details that need to be paid attention to ~ I wish you the best after reading it The newlyweds in this article can successfully crack the engagement hurdle! Of course, with the continuous simplification of modern etiquette and customs, basically as long as both parties reach an agreement and the elders of each other have reached a consensus, the wedding will be successful~ (This means that some tasks and details can be omitted, and both parties will be happiest. Important)

(Excerpted from: Overseas Weddings, Korean Weddings, Bali Weddings, Guam Weddings)

References:

1 Zhang Yuehui 1992 Consumption of Overseas Photography Photography Research on Behavior and Potential Consumption Behavior

2 Huang Ruiquan 1994 Research on Kaohsiung Citizens’ Wedding Photography Consumption Behavior

3 Chen Xinhong and Fu Huaihui 2004 Research on Wedding Photography Consumer Lifestyle and Consumption Behavior< /p>