How to love yourself and your lover?

People need love, family, society and nature need love, the world needs love, and love connects people. The word "people" takes two hands to make a sound, which means that people support each other-this world can't be achieved without love.

Both Confucianism and Mohism in China's traditional morality attach great importance to the cultivation of personality and love. In Mencius' view, benevolence is human, benevolence is human heart, and it is the heart of love and love. Kindness should become human nature. Mozi said more profoundly that "universal love" is the core of Mozi's ideological system. The idea of "universal love" is based on the equality of personality. People should help each other, understand each other, tolerate each other and be equal, whether they are officials or people, poor or rich. Mozi also stressed that love is not for personal reputation, but for the interests of others. Love is not rejecting yourself, but loving yourself.

Through long-term practice and observation, the ancient sages and health experts in China realized that they could understand the mystery of self-love and his love, and they had the key to open the door to happiness. They regard self-love and love as the means and purpose to sublimate morality and benefit life. Today, it seems that "self-love and self-love" also has a very positive social significance and health care function.

What is self-love? There are limits to self-love. There is an instinct of self-protection in life, such as drinking water when thirsty, eating when hungry and sleeping when sleepy. This is the self-love of animals. On this basis, we should not lose childlike innocence, see the benefits and never forget the righteousness, benefit others without harming others, and realize the survival value with self-esteem, self-confidence, self-control and self-improvement; For yourself and others, let yourself be physically and mentally healthy, live a full and happy life, and therefore live a complete and noble life. This is the self-love of human nature.

As for the first thing, I especially intend to do it myself. Always think of yourself in everything, often harming others and others. This behavior is not self-love, but selfishness. Once such people lose their self-interest or desire, they will be depressed, feel inferior and lonely, and often lose their faith in life and survival. Such people will only pay too much attention to themselves and lose their destiny in the end. As the old saying goes, "The world only knows that my handwriting is too true, so I have many hobbies and troubles."

There is another kind of person who is rich in family wealth, but empty in spirit. He often said that life is rare, eat, drink and be merry in time, so he indulged in debauchery and did whatever he wanted without restraint. There are even individuals who, in order to enjoy themselves, abandon their common interests and disregard national laws and take risks. This is not self-love, but self-harm. This is proved by the fact that emperors, nobles and playboys who died early in the past dynasties were useless even after their illness. As for many unjust cases, there are countless examples of self-abandonment.

To be kind to others is to love others. Love is the concrete embodiment of self-love, and it is the supplement, extension and sublimation of self-love. Without the embodiment of love, self-love is incomplete, and the unity of self-love and love in one's love can better show the level of one's personality. Lovers have different realms

Caring for people around you, such as relatives, friends, neighbors and colleagues at work, is inextricably linked with themselves, and they have sympathy and care for themselves, which can make their living environment harmonious, peaceful and warm. This is the first realm of love.

Being interested in people and things that have nothing to do with them, being willing to help them as much as possible, and often being able to put themselves in others' shoes, "Don't do to others what you don't want them to do to you" is their criterion in dealing with people, which is the second realm of love.

Higher-level people are passionate about their own nation and country, and all the races and countries that live together on this earth, and care about major events at home and abroad, just as they care about their own affairs. This is true love that will keep us alive, great love between lovers. Lovers can often feel an indescribable heat flow all over the body, and realize their mutual love with nature and human beings, which is the third realm of lovers.

There is also a kind of love with great wisdom, which not only has the above three realms, but also can transcend the love for specific things and rise to the ultimate concern for human destiny, and can give quiet thinking and lasting attention to the long river of history. Such people sometimes sacrifice their personal interests, even their precious lives, for others, for the nation, for the country and even for the public interest of the world. Although human life is limited, this special lover melts his love into the long river of life, thus making the limited life an eternal glory.

From the psychological point of view, self-love and love not only bring happiness to oneself and others, but also keep personal psychological balance and stability, which is extremely beneficial to physical and mental health and is conducive to disease prevention and anti-aging. Not to mention ordinary people, even a condemned prisoner can feel the pleasure of his lover. This man wrote in his prison diary: "I donated my rough and uninspired paintings to people in need." The powerful influence of doing good deeds makes me realize the true meaning of helping others to be happy. Although I only paid some' boring time', I opened a' window of the soul', which is a brand-new experience that I have never experienced before. "

Of course, love is not promiscuity, it has principles. Judging from Mozi's thought of "universal love", those wicked and sinners either advised them to abandon evil and do good; If you can't convince them, you must punish them by force. If evil is not punished, the ideal of "universal love" will be difficult to realize in the end.

In short, a person who doesn't know how to love is like a broken melon. If he doesn't know how to love himself or others, he will surely die of thirst. Love is a balanced account book. If you appreciate being loved in love, you will reap twice as much. A person who loves himself, others and nature must have strong vitality, and the value of life can be truly reflected.