Yu Guangzhong's marriage: holding your hand and singing with your husband? Poetic life

If new snow begins, a full moon will appear in the sky.

Hao Ying is tiled below.

Bright silver flows on it.

You came to me with a smile.

Between moonlight and snow.

You are the third amazing color.

Yu Guangzhong

On February 4th, 65438+65438, the first snow of this winter greeted most parts of northern China. Taiwan Province writer and famous poet Yu Guangzhong died at the age of 89.

Most people began to know Mr. Yu from the song "Homesickness" in middle school textbooks, and later became familiar with many excellent literary works created by Mr. Yu. But few people know that he and his wife have been happily married for 6 1 year, which also left us a lot of valuable wisdom in marriage life.

Falling in love: a thin narcissus came to me.

Yu Guangzhong's mother and Fan Wocun's mother are distant cousins. Yu Guangzhong 17 years old, Fanwo Village 13 years old. They met at home during menstruation. When they first met, they both liked each other.

According to Fanwo Village, Yu Guangzhong "looks a little serious and shy with a flat head and linen uniform". Before that, Fan Wocun often mentioned this cousin during menstruation, praising him for his good study, excellent Chinese and English, and talent for painting. Fan couldn't help looking at him a few more times, but both of them were shy, so they didn't say a few words, only invited her to their house to play.

Shortly after we met, Fanwo Village received a colleague's publication from him, which contained Byron's works translated by Yu Guangzhong. Ironically, the recipient's name written on the envelope turned out to be "Fan Mimi". Little nerd didn't know Mimi was just a nickname and didn't even ask her real name. When I received the publication, I felt a little abrupt and didn't know much about English poetry, but I was still fascinated by Yu Guangzhong's literary talent.

1948, because of the war, two young people lost contact. 1950, Yu Guangzhong's family moved to Taiwan Province Province, and he happened to find that his cousin was studying in Taipei Girls' Middle School, but dropped out of school because of lung disease.

Yu Guangzhong recalled Fanwo Village at that time: Although it was pitiful in appearance, it was actually soft on the outside and rigid on the inside, with fair skin and correct facial features, and it was very likable since childhood. Later, Yu Guangzhong described his cousin in the article "In April, in the Ancient Battlefield": "A thin narcissus, graceful and elegant, blushing and shining, pale and powerless, resisted precocious lung disease, dreamed of literature and love, and was helpless and desperate. ...

At that time, lung disease was still a very difficult disease to cure, and both parents were not optimistic about their love. However, with the constant encouragement of Yu Guangzhong, Fanwo Village miraculously got better. 1September 2, 956, lovers who have been in love for six years finally entered the marriage hall.

As the dividing line of a woman's life, marriage is soft and shy before marriage, and soon becomes confident and strong after marriage. I remember, in those days, the doorbell and the telephone often rang together. She put the child in the cart, while busy cooking, grabbed the phone first, and then ran down the porch to open the door. In the heyday of the Yu family, there were eight mouths, big and small, countless trivial matters and an amazing appetite. They must also consider nutrition and delicious food. They often feed this and cry that. Gradually, she also learned to be practical, and her romantic fantasies before marriage had to be put aside for the time being.

Despite this, Fanwo Village did not blame her husband, leaving him a vast world of activities. Yu Guangzhong has many friends. Some friends come to visit us, and Fanwo Village always treats us warmly. She not only shouldered the burden of raising her daughter, but also handled her friendship very appropriately.

Yu Guangzhong was moved by his wife's generosity and tolerance, and often used poetry to repay his wife. In his prose, he described his wife like this: "She is very sensitive to literature and has good taste, which is the most attractive trait for me;" She dug up a world for me and let me write quietly behind. I am very grateful to her. "In the circle of friends, Yu Guangzhong praised his wife for many advantages more than once.

Profile picture: In front of the former residence of Xiamen Street 1964, Yu Guangzhong and his wife, Shanshan, You Shan and Pei Shan.

"She has many advantages," Yu Guangzhong said. "The most important thing is that we can integrate spiritually, and she can fully integrate into my career and my friends. We not only have the same hobbies, but also have the same friends. How can our marriage be unstable? " "After marriage, he trusted me and relied on me 100%. Although he is not a sweet and considerate husband, he shows his love for me and my children with his actions. "

Profile picture: 1976 Yu Guangzhong and his wife are in Hong Kong.

Once, I gave a lecture at Nanjing University. This lecture is very interesting. Yu Guangzhong wants to talk about love with his students. "Love is not the patent of young people. An old poet can also talk about it. "

He is a poet. When it comes to love, it is natural to talk about love poems. "Du Fu only wrote one or two poems to his wife in his life. What a bummer! " He said, "I'm different. I write more to my wife. " I am much more romantic than Du Fu! "

At that time, there were many audiences, including Fanwo Village.

Writer Murong Liansheng once described the life of Yu Guangzhong and Fanwo Village in the sketch "Every Lotus is Like You":

"On idle days, they travel together. One car, one map, two people. Fan: I can't drive, but she has a good sense of direction. Therefore, she is responsible for reading the map, and Yu Guangzhong is responsible for mastering the steering wheel of the car. Good scenery all the way. "

Regarding family relations, Yu Guangzhong also has his own views: "It is an art for husband and wife to compromise with each other." "If the wife is right, the children will naturally be right." "Home is a place to talk about love, not a place to reason." "Marriage is one-on-one freedom and one-plus-one democracy."

Watching her four daughters grow up day by day, Yu Guangzhong called her home a woman's world. I wake up every day and see eight braids flying. He prefers to enjoy tolerance and love in the "girl country".

On the 30th wedding anniversary, Yu Guangzhong gave his wife a pearl necklace and wrote a poem for her, which will make people who have been married for many years moved:

pearl necklace

Scroll in every corner of memory,

What a precious day half-life is,

I thought I'd never get it back,

But the girl in the jewelry store,

There is a blue magnetic plate,

Asked me with a smile:

Is this 18 inch suitable?

In this way, 30 years has become a string.

Less than an inch a year, what an expensive time!

Every grain contains glittering silver ash,

Warm and complete, just like luck.

I share it with you every day.

Every grain is a dewdrop on a sunny day;

Every one is a rain bead on a cloudy day;

On the day of breaking up, every grain

The rosary in my heart.

String this necklace with a head and a tail,

Lean on your heart.

It passes through the sun and the moon,

A 18 inch long karma line.

1986.9.2 30th wedding anniversary (Pearl wedding)

Old age: Encourage your wife to find her lost dreams.

After all four daughters were married, my life was idle. In order to enrich his wife's life and reorganize her pursuit of art, Yu Guangzhong encouraged her to enrich herself and "find lost dreams".

Profile picture: Yu Guangzhong's family photo in 2008 (taken on a cruise to Norway)

At the suggestion of Yu Guangzhong, Fan Wocun passed the exam and became a staff member of Kaohsiung Art Museum. Later, I began to learn photography and took pictures everywhere. Yu Guangzhong introduced a friend of his who is engaged in professional photography to her as a teacher.

As long as Fan Wocun produced satisfactory works, Yu Guangzhong gave her a message. The husband and wife cooperated very tacitly and opened a column in the newspaper. Their works are eclectic and often give people beautiful enjoyment, which caused quite a stir in the literary and art circles of Taiwan Province Province and added a lot of fun to their later life.

It is not easy to marry a talented person. His heart is free and belongs to the world. As the wife of a talented person, on the one hand, we should cherish his talent and creative spark, on the other hand, we should be a candle willing to sacrifice everything for him, burn ourselves, illuminate him and the whole family, and always be his strong backing and give him encouragement and strength. You must have infinite wisdom and interest in life to keep up with the pace of talented people. Yu Guangzhong and Fan Wocun, who are in step with each other, wrote a love movement that lasted for 665,438+0 years, and truly realized the goal of holding hands with children, singing with women and living poetically. This is an example for us to learn.