Cute story: I want to go to heaven, but I can’t find an elevator

1. You give me a lover, and I give you a favor.

2. Bees are busy all day long and are praised, while mosquitoes are constantly running around and being beaten by everyone.

3. As long as you live better than me and die earlier than me

4. I treat you like a human being, but you bark like a dog?

5. Is there anyone who doesn’t want to think about it in the morning and doesn’t want to sleep at night?

6. When I walked to the examination room, I collapsed and cried when I saw the papers. I didn’t take the test on anything I memorized, and I didn’t know anything on the test.

7. If you want to be a good monster now, you must defeat Ultraman at all costs.

8. What is your lung capacity? How can you boast so much!

9. Marriage is about wearing a cotton coat for freedom. It is inconvenient to move around, but it will be very convenient. warmth.

10. I received an email today: Please apply for a replacement kindergarten graduation certificate as soon as possible, thank you

11. In this era of information overflow, do you still need to be proud of having more information? ? I have long been ashamed of knowing everything!

12. It is difficult for a hero to pass the test of beauty. I am not a hero, but beauty helped me pass the test.

13. Only unattractive women say men are philanderers, and only incompetent men say women Reality!

14. Each carrot has a pit, but some pits are either too big or too small

15. I am so heartbroken that it looks like dumpling fillings when I hold it out.

16. Not everyone can live a low-key life. The basis for being low-key is that you can be high-profile at any time.

17. A man’s brain likes a woman’s heart, but his eyes like a woman’s appearance

18. The difference between leaders and us is that they walk on the red carpet, while we walk on the zebra crossing .

19. In another hundred years, it will grow into towering green onions.

20. What am I doing if you have nothing to do with me? Don’t you know I’m busy?

21. I am so busy that I don’t even know what to do.

22. A 19-year-old child followed the address of an old Chinese medicine doctor on a telephone pole. When he saw the doctor, he said in surprise: Uncle Wang, you don’t want to buy feed anymore?

23. Beautiful women only show us the surface, don’t always try to delve into their inner meanings!

24. Love the first person out of spontaneity; love the second person out of inertia; love the last person out of laziness.

25. When life maliciously turned everything into black humor, I turned myself into a highly educated gangster.

26. This story is purely fictitious. If there is any similarity, please contact God.

27. Going back on my word is my style, betraying others and leaving relatives is my current situation, and living a long life is my result.

28. I will work hard to realize my dreams to make up for the awesomeness I boasted about when I was young.

29. Why sleep for a long time while alive? You will definitely sleep forever after death!

30. When I hold my hand, I realize that I am ugly, and burst into tears. If you don’t leave, I will leave.

31. A painter has a butt as big as his ideal!

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33. Love means I don’t think you’re pretending, and you don’t think I’m dirty.

34. Life is like having a dry stool. If you exert some force, you will feel better afterwards.

35. Yesterday, I received a text message asking me to transfer money to an account of the Agricultural Bank of China as soon as possible. I replied: Don’t worry, I’ll burn it for you right away!

36. When others start to call you crazy, you are not far away from success.

37. When you can’t figure it out, think about yourself in China. It suddenly dawned on me

38. When I got married, I was attracted by it, but when I got divorced, I was mistaken.

39. Want to get a free sports car? Want to get a free villa? Want to get free beauties? Please log in

40. The world is so beautiful, but I am so irritable, this is not good

41. I am walking between unrestrained self-reflection and narcissism

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42. I want to go to heaven, but I can’t find an elevator

43. When I was a child, I wanted to grow up quickly, but when I grow up, I want to go back to my childhood. This world is so contradictory!

44. Now the robbery begins! The rich take money, the poor borrow money!

45. My girlfriend refused to do housework because her aunt was here. My boyfriend said: Your aunt is here! Damn it, my eldest cousin is here too. It is always said on the Internet that women are like clothes, but I am depressed. Why is it so difficult to find suitable clothes?

46. I like boring people. Being boring in front of others. Show off in front of me.

47. Today’s master’s degree is like a grain of rice on the sole of your foot. It feels uncomfortable if you don’t hold it, and you can’t eat it if you take it. 48. I learned to drink because I want to be lonely. and drowned in sadness. Unexpectedly, they fucking learned to swim

49. A woman is plump when she is fat, slender when she is thin, slender when she is tall, and delicate when she is short. A fat man is like a fat pig, a thin man is like a rib, a tall man is like a bamboo pole, and a short man is like a winter melon!

50. When you grow up, marry Tang Seng as your husband. If you can play with him, play with him; if you can’t, eat him up.

51. An inch of time is worth an inch of gold. An inch of gold cannot buy an inch of time, but I am still willing to sell my time for a day to exchange for some gold.

52. Women, look Beauty is an advantage, living beautifully is a skill

53. A man’s lies can deceive a woman for a night, and a woman’s lies can deceive a man for a lifetime.

54. Don’t hang yourself on a tree, try to die on several nearby trees

55. Because I love you with all my heart, so I I can only give up on you heartlessly.

56. Save water and try to take a shower with your girlfriend

57. Love your neighbor with all your heart, but don’t let her husband know

58 .Elder! The little girl may have inconvenience during menstruation! After hearing this, Tang Monk put his hands together and said, "Amitabha, the poor monk is here to learn the scriptures!"

59. I study on purpose, work on purpose, live on purpose, and live like a human being on purpose!

60. A man wants to divorce his wife after he makes money, but his wife wants to divorce him when he cannot make money.

61. A newspaper canceled a photo: a photo of a couple and their dog. And with the picture caption dog, male and female.

62. God took love away from me and said: Love is not yours! So I cried and went to play games with the children

63. It is said that certificates have a certain gold content. I took the certificates and burned them, but I couldn’t find the iron filings!

64. You take your Yangguan Road, and I will take my Naihe Bridge

65. Problems that can be solved with money are not problems, but the problem is that I am poor.

66. When you put on the wedding dress of love, I also put on the monk's cassock

67. There was gold under the man's knees, so I cut off the whole leg, even I couldn't find any copper!

68. If you see a shadow in front of you, don’t be afraid, it’s because there is sunshine behind you!

69. I have done a lot of stupid things, but I don’t care. My friends call it confidence.

70. My eyesight is very poor. For example, can you see the thumbtack on the wall over there? You can see it, but I can't.

71. It used to be called stealing and digging graves, but now it’s called archaeological science! I want to go to heaven, but I can't find the elevator. Funny quotes

I'm walking between unrestrained self-reflection and narcissism

I want to go to heaven, but I can't find it. Elevator

I have always regarded handsome men and money as dirt, and they have always regarded me this way

It takes ten thousand years for a monkey to become a human, but only one bottle of wine for a human to become a monkey

You must look carefully when looking for a partner now, because there are too many people who are neither men nor women!

Only with the banknote can you go to the back of the banknote.

I raped the earth when I slept on my stomach, and raped the entire universe when I slept on my back.

There is never a word "difficult" in my dictionary, because I don't have a dictionary!

Many times, I like others, but she doesn’t know; more often, I hurt others, but I don’t know.

It’s been a long time since anyone has made cowhide look so fresh and refined!

Glasses are the windows to the soul. To protect your windows, please put glass on them

In this era of overflowing information, do you still want to be proud of having more information? I have long been ashamed of knowing everything!

It is difficult for a hero to pass the test of beauty. I am not a hero, but beauty helped me pass the test.

Only unattractive women say that men are philandering, and only incompetent men say that women are realistic!

There is a pit for each radish, but some pits are either too big or too small.

I am so heartbroken that when I hold them out, they look like dumpling fillings.

It is my style to go back on my word, my status quo is to rebel against others, and my result is to live a long life.

I have to work hard to realize my dreams to make up for the awesomeness I boasted about when I was a kid.

Why sleep for a long time while alive? You will sleep forever after death!

Holding my hand, I realized that I was ugly, and burst into tears. If you don’t leave, I will leave.

A painter’s butt is as big as his ideal

If a man does not drink jealousy, he will not be emotionally rich; if a woman does not drink jealousy, the family will not be harmonious; if the elderly do not drink jealousy, they will become more confused as they get older; if children do not drink jealousy, they will never make progress.

Love means I don’t think you’re pretending, and you don’t think I’m dirty.

Life is like having a dry stool. Just exert some force and you will feel better afterwards.

Yesterday, I received a text message asking me to transfer money to an account of the Agricultural Bank of China as soon as possible. I replied: Don’t worry, I’ll burn it for you right away!

When others start to call you crazy, you are not far away from success.

When you can’t figure it out, think about yourself in China, and everything will suddenly become clear.

When I got married, I was attracted by it, but when I got divorced, I was mistaken.

Want to get a free sports car? Want to get a free villa? Want to get free beauties? Please log in to WWW. Dreaming

The world is so beautiful, but I am so irritable. Isn’t this good? I accidentally overturned my memories, but I still can’t find myself

1. I It can give you a warm embrace of 37.5℃ on a 0℃ day.

2. Sometimes, people who know how to avoid problems are better than people who know how to solve them.

3. If the whole world were happy, there would be no word breakup.

4. I can easily aim at your head but blow out your balls

5. What you said is forever turns out to be just a blink of an eye!

6. It may be hard, but we must move forward. ---"The Heirs"

7. Sparse shadows slant across the clear and shallow water, and a faint fragrance floats in the moonlit dusk.

8. Everything happens for a reason, whether you are sad or happy, everything is just fate after all.

9. The myth about the promise of life in the afterlife is just a myth. If it is lost, it is lost.

10. It is normal for a person to contact you suddenly because he is looking for a spare tire; it is also normal for a person to not contact you suddenly because you are just a spare tire.

11. Perhaps, in the end, my failure and greatness are all decided by myself. ---Tracy Hu

12. I would rather be a madman than a fool who pretends to know nothing.

13. Missing has turned into tears, drop by drop Stung my heart. /shuoshuo/

14. Since you love, why don’t you say it out loud? Some things are lost and can never be regained!

15. I accidentally overturned my memories, but I still couldn’t find myself

16. If you don’t love your home, you can’t be a human being, and home is not just inside the door. That little place.

17. In fact, he is very ordinary, but he is very special in my eyes.

18. I love you, love in my lifetime, before my heart dies.

19. After many years, when you are deeply in love with her, will you remember that you owe me a future?

20. His smile is like a spring breeze, but it cannot blow away the peach blossoms in my heart.

21. Hello tomorrow, I will never fail

22. We cannot rely too much on others, even your shadow will leave you in the dark

< p> 23. ^ Give the person who loves you a chance, maybe you will fall in love with him too

24. Brushing your teeth is a sad and happy thing, because you have a cup in one hand and a cup in the other. Washing utensils.

25. Fu is a beautiful dress and a fancy umbrella.

26. I always want you to listen to the sound of rain, because I think it is the sound of longing.

27. You will always be the protagonist of my world, and I will always be the supporting role of your world.

28. Just because I am not angry does not mean that I have no temper

29. From now on, if anyone says he loves you, just go up and slap him in the face. If he doesn’t fight back, he probably really loves you.

30. I sincerely wish those who pretended to say they did not do well as soon as the exam is over to get what they want.

31. Can I give up on you and no longer miss you? If I don’t love you, I won’t miss you anymore

32. What has changed is changed and cannot be undone. No matter how hard you try, there is nothing you can do. I can’t find Bole’s words

I can’t find Bole’s words

1. Times are changing and society is developing. Many people lament that it is getting harder and harder to make money, whether it is Work or start a business! It is said that those who work in three hundred and sixty years will be number one, but now all walks of life are saturated. Some people even say that horses with thousands of miles of horses are often found but Bole is not. If you have a talent, you will not find a platform or opportunity to display your ability. You need to choose an industry that suits you based on your interests and expertise

2. Ask yourself why your enthusiasm for a job is only limited to asking yourself over and over again for two months before you realize that you are doing too much. No one appreciates it, so much helplessness, no experience, and I can never find my Bole.

3. Do things well for yourself so that people who want to find fault with you will not find a reason! Talk less, do more! There will always be someone who discovers your strengths!

4. Even in the dark night, beautiful things can still be seen. Gold can shine anywhere. As long as there is Bole, there is no fear of not finding a thousand-mile horse. . .

After work in the evening, I went back with my friends and encountered such a scenery on the way. . .

5. It is really easy for excellent people to develop a sense of superiority, and they believe that the average level of society is at their level, so they accidentally hurt others, so I forgive myself for being mediocre and incompetent. and low self-esteem, which makes it so easy for me to live in this society without suffering from not being able to find a close friend

6. Put down the makeup brush I am an amateur photographer, I like photography, Like to keep good memories. Photography is my hobby and I like to take pictures of my own thoughts and creativity. Secondly, I am also a good shooting model, a good model who does not waste the shutter. However, I am very lonely. I can't find that Bole and I can't find anyone who loves me. The person I love is married. It’s just that the bride is not me.

7. Believe that hard work will not be mistreated. If you can't find Bole, try to become your own Bole.

8. In the mooncake incident, Ali’s attitude is: Management is more important than anything else. If you obey, stay, if you don’t obey, get out. Horses with thousands of miles of horses are often found, but Bole is not always found. The world is so big, are you afraid that you can’t find talents?

9. I woke up early in the morning and found that my songs had received many comments from strangers. Everyone did not know each other, but they supported me and encouraged me in the comments. Before, I always felt that I could not find Bole. , but now I feel warmed by the attention of strangers and feel the kindness from this world. It’s so good

10. You should be able to see good results with your hard work. Yes or no? I felt really sad last night when I saw the performance I wrote last year. If there was a good Bole, it wouldn't be what it is now. No matter how hard I try and go all out, I can't find the energy I had at last year's work.

11. It’s really annoying to have no talent and not be appreciated. It’s really annoying to not find a close friend and appreciate your talents.

12. A thousand-mile horse is used to obscurity and hides itself among the horses. In the end, it will It became one with the horses. Ren Bole searched for it one by one, but could not find it. 13. Now I am very confused and can't find the direction, so I slowly become anxious. I am restless and need a stable job to keep myself busy, but what should I do? Although I am not a thousand-mile horse, I still need a Bole.

14. From today on, you can either work hard to chase your dreams, or you can be someone else’s feet. The difference between mud and mud is nothing more than this. Don’t fall, you are not qualified! You need to see clearly whether your failure is due to lack of Bole or your own inability! The best way to love yourself is to work hard to make yourself better. If you continue to be decadent, don’t be depressed about not having a confidant or finding true love, because you don’t even love yourself, and you still expect others to love you

15. So be it, I won’t live for anyone in a humble way. If a thousand-mile horse is good enough, it won’t be afraid that it won’t find its rightful man.

16. Zeng Guofan said: The world is not troubled by the lack of talent, but the trouble is that those who use talents cannot make use of them. There is Zhuge Liang in every era, but Liu Bei cannot be found; there are horses in every era, but Bole cannot be found.

17. Tired in capital letters I don’t know whether I should reflect on myself or continue to look for it. I don’t know where the misfortune came from in the past two years. I feel like I have fallen into an alley and can’t get out. I have been struggling but I still stay put. Even I want to retreat, where is the problem, and I want to work hard. Where is the direction, where, where, and where I can't find it. I'm all in trouble. The legendary Bole can give me some pointers.

18. As the saying goes: A thousand-mile horse often exists, but a bole does not always exist; but as the saying goes, the fragrance of wine is not afraid of the depth of the alley! Don't complain that you can't find Bole, it may be that you are not good enough. Keep enriching yourself and believe that gold will always shine!

19. The green weather in Canada is very short, and many industries require summer jobs, such as lawn mowing. Look at this child, he looks like a student at first glance. A friend said that he was engaged in IT. I didn’t understand. I could only say, show your work to others (I wonder why you haven’t been able to find a job in this major for more than 10 years?) and said that you need a Bole. From this, I thought of my son, hoping that with the help of his mentor's connections, he would get the opportunity to meet people and let others know his talents, and find a good job.

20. I have no use for it, and I regret that my twenty years of grafting skills cannot find anyone who needs me. Time is passing and time cannot be saved. If you want to travel or do grafting of landscape gardens or bonsai flowers, come to me. My reward for you will also be great. The varieties I grafted include Camellia oleifera tree grafted to camellia, juniper grafted to true cypress, silver myrtle grafted to red rocket, rhododendron grafted to azalea, green maple grafted to feather maple, and rose tree grafted to rose tree. If you are interested in investing with me

21. I always feel like I am a thousand-mile horse. Where's Bole? Can't find the way or am still blind.

22. A thousand-mile horse cannot find Bole: it will always run in vain: Buddhist practitioners cannot change their bad habits and will always stay in their habits. Good evening, I wish you all a happy and healthy family life. Disasters prolong life: Don’t do any evil

23. Recently, the Central Committee of the Communist Party of China has appointed and dismissed a large number of leading cadres at the provincial and ministerial levels, provincial and autonomous regions, and several universities. I searched carefully and couldn’t find them. Is the name of He Weifang who went to Peking University, the name of this grandson omitted, or is it because Bole doesn't know a thousand-mile horse? This grandson, He Weifang, dreamed of becoming an official. His hair turned white and he became He Zamao, but he still didn't get it. Earlier, there was Fan Juren. Could it be that He Weifang, who was 60 years old before, was really allowed to fend for himself? Could it be that He was really allowed to sleep on the earth?

24. Everyone hopes that someone can see them, appreciate their strengths and help them get rid of their shortcomings. But I wouldn’t recommend myself. There are too many things to learn. Every thousand-mile horse also has the right to choose Bole. Even if it is not a thousand-mile horse, it will not be so stupid that it cannot find grass.

25. When I was watching the new songs, I found that I couldn’t find a student in this period who could compete with Lu Junzhe. The instructor only favored those stupid young people who had just debuted, so that they could give guidance and express the mentors’ talents. The ability to change them, and Lu Junzhe surpassed them in terms of stage style, singing skills, technique, excitement, and song arrangement ability. They have no way to start. Now you only need a good person with a discerning eye and a good company to promote your product. Great song!

26. After writing the first half of the script, I stopped for a while and wondered whether I could write it well? Maybe it’s not that material! No one read my script and no one wanted to make it into a movie! What's the use of just having passion? I can’t find that Bole! Until this afternoon, I was still listless and feeling weak! In the evening, I accidentally saw other people's inspiring lives, and I was suddenly inspired: People still have to be full of hope in life, otherwise, what is the purpose of living?

27. In this era of tolerance and acceptance, there are really very few people who don’t appreciate their talents. The so-called inability to find Bole is just because he is not good enough and thinks too highly of himself.

28. His appearance and acting skills are pretty good, but why is he not popular? The answer is: He hasn’t found his Bole yet! If he can't find it in the past two years, it will be difficult for him to find it in his lifetime. Why? The answer is: your appearance will age!

29. Finding a job is very similar to finding a boyfriend: improve yourself (do internships, study), decorate yourself (do CV, Linkedin), and wait for the opportunity. Luck plays a part, but if you are a really good horse, there will always be people who appreciate you. If you can't find a boyfriend and can't find your ideal job, are you really as good as you think?

Thirty. But there will always be good girls of all kinds, proud, shy, gentle, kind, thrifty, able to endure, and there will always be those who are suitable for holding a child. If you can't find the person you want, don't blame others. Most of the problems lie with you. Are you ambitious and talented? Is it false compassion and true hypocrisy? Is he a giant in words but a dwarf in action? Are you squandering money while playing games and then scolding Bole for dying at the wrong time?

31. Some people are lonely because they don’t want to compare themselves with others to show their incompetence. Some people are lonely because they are tired of the hypocrisy between people. Some people are lonely because they can’t find like-minded people. , some people are lonely, maybe they are just lonely. The world is so big, and I haven’t found myself yet.

32. Junior brother said he wanted to do this, and I told him what are the good things about doing this, what are the bad things about it, what are the expected effects, how to think about it, and how to do it. What should be done for the time being? Change the code into the most convenient and scalable interface and then tell him which function to fill in. How can it be expanded in the future? What is the upper limit? After saying that, I feel that this kind of talent is really hard to find even with a light on.

33. Walking in this prosperous city, I can’t find a place for my career! Bole, where are you?

34. Life is very uncertain. I want to graduate as soon as possible, because my world can no longer withstand decadence and cannot find an exit. I just want a few talented people to take me out. This dull sky.