Nine fables

After mantis was transferred to snail and hydra circle as a judge, he was still tried according to the criminal law of worm circle.

One day, he stood majestically in the middle of the judgment seat and raised the verdict with his sickle-like front foot:

"Green hydra killed compatriots, heinous, irrefutable evidence, sentenced to death, executed immediately. The death penalty is executed by cutting the head in half with a knife. "

The green hydra was secretly amused when he heard the verdict. On the court, there is a lot of discussion.

"Quiet! Quiet! " Mantis then announced:

"Greedy snails steal fasting plants, and the crime is minor. According to Article 151 of the Criminal Law, the tentacles are cut off to show a lesson. "

The greedy snail fainted at once, and all the other snails were indignant:

"Your honor, your sentence is too heavy."

"Yes, didn't it kill him?"

"You don't know, our snail's eyes are long in ..."

"Nonsense!" Before they finished, Mantis patted the stone table and shouted, "Are you a judge or am I a judge? Whoever dares to make trouble again, I will detain him! "

Everyone was silent.

Snails' eyes grow on long antennae, and short antennae are their "noses". After two pairs of antennae were cut off, the greedy snail could no longer see, smell or find food, and died a few days later.

The green hydra has a strong regenerative ability. After its head was cut in half, it not only didn't die, but also grew into two heads. Since then, the crime of hydra has become more and more serious.

Snail sued Judge Mantis in the Primary Animal Court.

Judge mantis was removed from his post. Not convinced, it argued, "When I was a judge in the insect world, I always tried according to this criminal law. Everyone says that I am the most just iron and blood contractor; Now, I am still trying according to this criminal law. Why should I leave my post? "

"Because of this, you are fired. Snails, polyps and insects are very different in physiology, but you should still judge them according to the criminal law of insects. As a result, the greedy snail who committed a misdemeanor lost his life, and the green hydra who committed a murder case did not get the end it deserved. "

Mantis hung his head.

Chop earthworms

There are many small animals on the flowers and plants, three inside and three outside. What are they looking at? Oh, a mantis named Cui Cui is performing magic: chopping earthworms. Cui Cui raised a sickle-shaped front foot, clicked, and cut the earthworm in the middle of the grass into two pieces. The audience's heart suddenly hung up: can the cut earthworm be resurrected? Can you still grow into the original appearance? Just when everyone thought so, a miracle happened: two cut earthworms became complete earthworms with a head and a tail. The audience cheered for the stunt of Mantis Cui Cui.

At this time, a mantis named Qingqing said to everyone, "What's strange about this! We mantis have two natural knives. Who can't chop earthworms? I'll show you another one right away. " It put a red earthworm in the grass and asked. Cui Cui quickly said to it, "Don't cut it yet. Let me tell you the main points. " Qingqing doesn't believe in the significance of chopping earthworms. It raised its front foot and flashed a knife on the earthworm's back. Cui Cui didn't even have time to stop it.

"it's over!" Cui Cui cried, "With such a chop, only the earthworm with a tail and no head will never grow again, and it will only become a deformed earthworm with two tails."

"Hum, I don't believe it!" Qing Qing said unconvinced, "You can grow up if you cut it, but I can't!"

"Different places have different consequences. I told you to listen to the main points first, but you didn't listen. Hi! As a result, this cockroach was harmed. "

"I don't think it makes any sense to chop up earthworms."

"yes. Cutting off the first five to eight segments of earthworm can quickly regenerate a complete earthworm. If you cut it off after the fifteenth section, you can't regenerate the head in the second half, only a tail can grow. I cut the middle part of five to eight verses; What about you? You cut off the place after fifteen stanzas. "

"I don't believe it! I don't believe it! " Qingqing screamed.

"Then wait and see."

The audience looked nervously at the broken earthworm. After a long time, the earthworm with only a tail and no head really grew a tail from the incision and became a headless two-tailed earthworm.

Qingqing froze.

A released monkey

At a photography spot in Emei Mountain, the boss caught a monkey from the mountain to take pictures with him to attract customers. The monkey crouched on a 1.5-meter-high pillar with chains tied to his feet. It must stay there forever, because the chain is only 30 centimeters long. If it jumps, it will be hung upside down. Its face has been photographed in countless photos, accompanied by beautiful wife, handsome gentleman and innocent and lively children; However, the pleasure of enjoying the scenery of Mount Emei has nothing to do with it. It is just a prisoner on a pillar, where it can only endure the suffering of cold and heat, sunshine, frost and rain.

It was later discovered by a wildlife conservation society. The association thinks this is cruelty to animals and asks the boss to release the monkeys. The boss thinks this is his livestock, and others have no right to interfere. After a heated argument, the boss suggested that he would continue to run the business unless they paid for monkeys. The association had no choice but to accept the blackmail from the boss and redeem the monkey at a high price of 30 thousand yuan and put it back in the mountains.

When the chain was untied, the monkey looked at the strangers with suspicion. It doesn't know what happened. People gave it a banana and a handful of peanuts to signal it to go back to the forest. They also set off a long string of firecrackers to celebrate liberation. The monkey touched the bloody leg polished by the chain and limped away shyly. Deep in the forest, it makes a long cry, not knowing whether it is sad or happy.

The people dispersed and the mountain was calm again. That night, the winning boss naturally slept soundly. It was dawn, and I heard something outside the window. The boss opened the door and found the monkey squatting on the original post again.

The tragedy of the old tortoise

On the beach of the island, there is a huge turtle. It is basking in the warm sun, crawling slowly and feeling very comfortable.

A little seagull flew over, stopped on the turtle's back and asked,

"Grandpa, how old are you?"

"Not too old, 100 years old." The tortoise said slowly.

"ah! At your age, you must have been to many places, right? You must be very skillful, right? You ... "The curious little seagull asked like a barrage.

The old tortoise regained consciousness. He craned his neck, held his head high and swayed slightly, boasting:

"Well, I traveled all over the Pacific Ocean; I wandered all the desolate islands; I have also been to the deepest seabed to see the light. As for my magical ability, I must make your mouth water with envy ... "

Just as the tortoise was talking, the foam splashed and the little seagull suddenly flew away in horror. A man came over and turned the turtle upside down. When the man walked away, he smiled and said:

"I don't have time now. I'll put you on board in half a day. "

The old turtle knows that the big event is not good, so he is waiting for bad luck. Seeing the old turtle lying motionless on his back, the little seagull flew over and said in surprise:

"Grandfather, are you just waiting for someone else to take it away?"

Hearing this, the old turtle covered his face with two front feet in shame.

Big stinky grass enters the balcony

There is an empty flowerpot on the balcony, which is full of fertile soil. I saw the master stroking the porcelain basin, while delighted to himself:

"Well, in two days, the big stinky grass can come and settle down."

"Big smelly grass", what a horrible name. When the host turned away, all kinds of flowers almost jumped out of the flowerpot. Rose blushed and exclaimed, "Big smelly grass?" Well, he must be a terrible guy. Jasmine declared sadly, "Hey, I'm most afraid of strange smells." "The prickly cactus said angrily," Here it comes, let's all go! ""Milan said doubtfully, "Our master, is there something wrong with his nerves?" ……

An ominous atmosphere hangs over the balcony, and exotic flowers and plants are on tenterhooks all day, praying that the owner will bring eight laurel trees and even morning glory, for fear of bringing "big smelly grass".

"Here we are, here we are." On this day, the host excitedly ran into the balcony and carefully planted a handful of grass in the flowerpot.

The flower peeked at it, covering her nose, only to see a rectangular glume growing on the stem. The stem of glume is light brown-red, shallow in the middle, transparent at the top, much like petals, and the slender stem ends are spread layer by layer, which is both generous and beautiful. The flowers on the balcony are charming. Cordate telosma curiously ask:

"May I have your name?"

"My name is Dachoucao." The answer is very gentle, very gentle.

"Oh my god, this is really a big smelly grass? How can it be called such a name? " Cactus muttered to herself.

"Strange," said several flowers at the same time, "it has no taste at all."

"Yes, it's a big smelly grass", the host explained with a smile and danced. "You flowers, grass, balls and palms, don't underestimate it. Long-term seclusion in the mountains, belonging to the smelly grass family. People are not interested in it just because its name is unsightly. Now you can clearly see that it is elegant and handsome! "

The new big smelly grass conquered the residents on the balcony with its true colors and was immediately welcomed by everyone.

A leaf

The little bull planted a lemon eucalyptus, and the saplings grew happily in the spring breeze. In order to protect the young tree, the little bull set up a wooden sign next to the young tree, which said, "Please take care of the young tree".

"Oh, what a beautiful little tree. Of course you should take care of it." A little rabbit skipped by, enjoyed it for a while and said with admiration, "This little tree is really cute. I just want a young leaf as a bookmark in my photo album. How beautiful! "

Little rabbit carefully picked a leaf and left.

After a while, a little monkey came. As soon as the little monkey found the sapling, he cheered: "What a beautiful lemon eucalyptus, it will grow to the sky in the future, and I will perform climbing skills on the trunk as white as jade." Hey, let me take a leaf as a souvenir. Yes, just one piece. "

The little monkey carefully picked a leaf. I turned over with joy and ran away.

After a while, another bear came. The bear looked at the eucalyptus citriodora seedlings again and again, smelled them again, smacked his lips and said, "Not only is it beautiful, but it smells intoxicating. I want to taste a leaf and see what it tastes like. " Yes, in order to care for the young trees, I will never pick the second leaf again. "

Bear stroked a lemon eucalyptus leaf, chewed it gently with his teeth, nodded with satisfaction and left.

Then, the little goat passed by and the little pig passed by. ...

Everyone who passes by picks a leaf. However, only one day later, when the ox came to water the sapling, it was shocked: there was not a leaf left in the whole sapling!

Answer chicken

The ancient Greek philosopher Plato gave a definition to man: "Man is an animal without feathers."

When the two-legged rooster learned about it, he gritted his teeth and pulled out his feathers, grandly announcing to people, "Look, we are human beings!" " "

People are laughing.

The rooster asked angrily, "people have no feathers, and we have no feathers;" People only have two feet, so do we. Isn't this a fact? "

Socrates was asked to answer this question. Socrates grabbed a handful of shriveled grains and scattered them on the ground, and two chickens immediately rushed to compete. The two of them scrambled to swallow a shriveled grain into their stomachs. You peck fast, and I peck faster than you. Everyone is afraid that they will miss one. When the last few dry valleys were left in the local area, two cocks actually fought. You peck me, I kick you, you hold my crown, I bite your neck. Soon, both cocks were bleeding profusely, covered in black and blue, unable to move.

Socrates finally pulled them away and said with a smile, "Is it worth fighting for a few withered grains?"

Bochou and Maxima

Bochou was a good friend of Bole when he was young. As an adult, I made a living by grinding flour. Earned a little money and lived a tight life. I was sad all day, like an autumn loofah.

On this day, he came back from the city, but he smiled uncharacteristically.

The wife asked in surprise, "Did you find the treasure? Are you so happy today? " Bochou said, "I met Bole in the city, and he promised to send me a swift horse! Do the math, Maxima, travel thousands of miles every day and 800 miles at night. How many noodles can you grind in a day? In the future, we don't have to worry about our days! "

My wife has also heard that Bole is good at knowing swift horses. She is also very happy that her husband said so.

Early the next morning, Bochou took the family's dark horse into town. At noon, I came back riding a bordeaux horse wrapped in brocade. He said happily to his wife, "See? This is a red hare chasing the wind for thousands of miles! I rode back from the city and got home in less than an hour! "

Strangely, this red hare is not much faster than the original dark horse in sharpening, and the life in Bochou is still difficult. His wishful thinking failed, and his face was covered with clouds.

"alas! Everyone in the world says that Bole is good at understanding swift horses, but I think he is just a hollow reputation! " Zhou bo said with a sigh.

Soon, people who came back from the city said that Bole had found another horse in the horse market. This Hummer is very similar to Bochou's original dark horse.

Bochou shook his head: "Joke! Joke! "

Swimming professor

The rooster won the title of swimming professor. At first, the ducks didn't believe it: none of the ducks were rated as swimming professors, so how did the rooster become? Later, the rooster showed them the title certificate stamped with steel seal, and they had to accept this reality.

The duck thinks that since the rooster can be rated as a swimming professor, his swimming knowledge must be very profound. Why not invite him to give a lecture?

The rooster stepped onto the platform in a figure-of-eight step, cleared his throat and said, "Swimming, the word has three points of water, so swimming must be inseparable from water."

Ducks are all ears.

"You can swim with water, but you can't swim without water. You can't swim on the playground, in the house, on the roof, on the ridge, in the trees, and

"Where there is no water, you can't swim. We understand this! Professor, tell us what we don't understand! " A duckling couldn't help crying.

The cock gouged out the duckling mercilessly, and then said, "Where there is water, you may not be able to swim across.". For example, you can't swim in oily water, boiled water, muddy water, poisonous water, and ... "

"Professor, we also understand this. You'd better tell me something we don't know yet! " A duckling interrupted him.

"No wonder you can only float on the water, and you can't dive in if you want to dive into the water! How can you learn knowledge when you are all so unassuming? How can we make progress? " The rooster said unhappily.

"Professor, why can't we dive into the water? Would you please tell us something about this problem? " An old duck begged.

"This question is very simple," the rooster adjusted her glasses. "There are two reasons why you can't dive into the water: First, your hair is too much and too thick; Second, there is too much oil in the body. "

"How can we dive into the water?"

"This problem is also very simple. First, pull out your hair; Second, pump the oil out of the body with a syringe. Especially if your penis is too fat, you must pump the oil out. Otherwise, its buoyancy is too great. It will float on the water like a balloon, and you don't have to work hard. "

The ducks were dumbfounded one by one.

"However, these methods are a bit difficult to accept. Because it will make everyone suffer too much. There is a more scientific, simpler, easier and easier way.

"What way?" The ducks asked with concern.

"Everyone tied a big stone to his body and went down into the water. He must dive immediately!"

What kind of knowledge is this?

The ducks dispersed in a hubbub.