What are you waiting for?

Qi Mei's left hand was full of cabbage, and the red small handbag slipped from the inclined shoulder, stuck to the wrist, and mixed with plastic bags, dangling in tandem. At the T-junction, the green light just came on. She had no intention of pulling her handbag back on her shoulder, thinking of waiting for the green light to cross the road.

"Mom, the shoelaces are open." The son shook off Qi Mei's hand hard, stepped back a few steps, squatted on the inside of the sidewalk, slowly twisted his shoelaces and clumsily circled. Qi Mei was held by his son's hand, and the foot that had just crossed the zebra crossing had to be taken back. She frowned and looked at her son anxiously. As soon as the urging came to her lips, she remembered a paragraph that Xiaoyu's mother had just forwarded when her son came out at the school gate: "To raise children, you must have patience to drive turtles across the mountains!" ...... As parents, what we can do for our children is not to be an accomplice to anxiety, but to drive the tortoise over the mountain with a normal heart. " Yes, patience, patience again, now is not "anxiety", but anxiety.

The slow hand was fiddling with the shoelaces, but the son's eyes slipped to the slide not far away. In the activity center 200 meters away, children danced like colorful butterflies on slides, treadmills and swings, laughing and laughing one after another. In primary schools and kindergartens, children who have been locked up for a day pass by activity centers, begging to take advantage of it and seize the rare time to play for a while. Young parents in twos and threes, rather than reluctantly agreeing to their children's demands, might as well accept a short pause between busy work and tiring housework, a unique wait.

The son looked up with a painful expression and begged, "Mom, can you play for ten minutes?" "Qi Mei crouched down and put a big bag of vegetables at her feet. Her fingers, numb by plastic bags before, have a rest, but they still sting. Qi Mei put his handbag back on his shoulder, pinched his son's red face with his fingers and said, "I can't go today. Mom came back late, and the uncle who repaired the faucet must be in a hurry. " "

While speaking, the drip of the mobile phone spread out from the handbag. Qi Mei answered the phone, hurriedly apologized, and told the host that it was across the street and would arrive at the stairs in five minutes. The master muttered something and hung up the phone. The last sentence is: twenty minutes later than the appointed time. If this is based on the lawyer's price, ...

The elevator took Qi Mei, her son and master to the floor 2 1. The cool corridor made Qi Mei shudder. Just now, the handbag slipped between her wrists, so she raised her hand and took out the key effortlessly.

The son's reluctance was frightened by Qi Mei's frown. At this time, he followed his mother and protested with heavy steps, conveniently tearing off the couplets posted at the neighbor's door. At the age of "dogs also dislike", Chi Mei has a headache when she thinks about it. Her patience usually reaches its limit at the moment she gets out of the elevator, talking to her son in a low voice. It seems that her left ear went in and her right ear went out, so she was careless and couldn't help shouting a few words. Her heart really hurts the innocent tears on her son's cheek.

two

Every day, from the moment she got off work, Qi Mei rushed to the after-school classroom she entrusted to her son, took the bus and bought food. The moment she entered the elevator and pressed the floor, she gasped, her sore feet and sudden temples had the right to seize precious minutes and relax.

The master followed with a black face, and the repair time was mostly after work. A family's delay will be passed down like a fallen domino. When the next home is difficult to talk about, the master has been angry from the last home and has to laugh it off.

Once, twice, three times, the crisp and monotonous lock sound "click, click, click" reminds Qi Mei that "one thing, two things, three things ...", "Cooking, washing clothes, cleaning ..." There is a lot of housework waiting for her behind the gray iron gate.

The quick-witted master took off his shoes and went into the kitchen without waiting for Chi Mei to pass the slippers.

When Qi Mei changed his shoes, he didn't forget to pull back the small chair that his son deliberately kicked when he pouted in the morning. The husband's two slippers to the army were scattered two meters away. Xiang Jun's trouble is that he went out at the last minute, and his slippers became a burden to delay him. He had to kick them two meters away so that he could put his foot in the leather shoes at the door for the first time.

Tell his son to wash his hands, drink water and finish his homework. Qi Mei will take his son's bedroom door. The master has taken the faucet apart and found that the gasket inside is aging and leaking for a week. The master found a black washer from the tool kit he carried with him and changed it three times, five times and two times. He clapped his hands, because it was a small problem and didn't waste much time. His previous resentment of waiting was swept away. He said to Qi Mei, this is a small matter. If you have tools at home, you can spend a dollar on a washing machine and it will be done in a few minutes. Tell your man later, let him change it next time, and don't waste money.

Qi Mei replied, how dare you say that you are "powerless" in front of strangers? What's the use of saying it? The host finally checked the tap. Qi Mei said that she could get off work early tonight. She always felt sorry for leaving her mother to do housework alone every day. I bought her an ice cream at the grocery store when I went home. My daughter-in-law loves strawberries. She said with a simple and honest smile.

three

When the door lock rang, Xiang Jun rushed in, looked at the kitchen with his probe, remembered the faucet that Qi Mei had complained about for several days, and nodded his head as a greeting to the owner who squatted on the ground to pick up tools. "Fix it? Thank you master. " Go back to the bedroom.

Seeing off the host, Qi Mei was about to go into the kitchen to choose vegetables. In the bedroom came the voice of Xiang Jun: "Where is the Adidas sportswear I bought last time?" "

"sportswear?" Qi Mei murmured, his brain racing. "Why do you need sportswear? Today is not a weekend. "

Xiang Jun rushed to the kitchen, put his hand on the door frame and said, "Is the food bad? Xiao Lizi, Mu Wei and Zhuang Jiashu made an appointment to play at the club at seven o'clock, and they finally got tickets. "

Qi Mei holds Xiang Jun, and her nose is a little sour. She didn't know how to answer Xiang Jun. She didn't cook well, as if she still had some remorse in her heart. However, the boss is gone, and when I am busy, he can't think of home. Give me a hand.

"Mom, I'm hungry." The son's head squeezed in from the army's waist, his big eyes flashed, he asked his mother when to eat, and looked up at his father. In the past, his father either watched TV or played games.

"Good, right away." Jimeijia quickened the speed of choosing dishes, stood in the army for a while bitterly, not knowing what to do, and muttered impatiently, "Where are the sportswear?" Chi Mei didn't turn around and thought gloomily, "I'm not your secretary!" " I don't know how many times I've said it. My son is in front of me. Think about it or hold it back. "Come on, don't bother to look for it. Xiao Lizi is almost as tall as me. I asked him to bring me a set of sweatpants. " Xiang Jun waved impatiently, and the other hand touched his son's head. "What do you want to eat, Dad?" ? You son of a bitch. "Said with his son left the kitchen.

When the food was served, Xiang Jun didn't know when he left.

four

The woodpecker in the clock came out solemnly, nodded like a gentleman and went back solemnly. It was nine o'clock. "The woodpecker has gone back to bed, and it's time for you to go to bed." Chi Mei put away the story book, closed her eyes and waited for her son's bedtime program every night-kissing her mother on the cheek twice.

My son's chubby arm is not around his neck, and his little hand is holding his ring finger. Qi Mei opened her eyes, and her son squatted on the bed, awkwardly putting a ring made of colored silk thread on Mei Qi's finger. "Mom, can you marry me?" Chi Mei was puzzled. "The teacher said that only when you grow up can you marry the person you love the most. I have been waiting for a long time. I am a primary school student and have grown up. " That smart card must have seen her future uncle kneel down and put a diamond ring on her aunt at her wedding.

Qi Mei couldn't bear to refuse his son, and his nose was a little sour: such a small person was hungry and sleepy every day, miserable when he was sick, and maddening when he was naughty, from babbling to walking hand in hand, from crooked writing to riding around the hospital. Every year, at the moment when the birthday candles are blown out, the wishes made by Transformers, game consoles and sons have all come true. Qi Mei silently wishes his son to grow up faster and stronger, be sensible and obedient, and stop being all hands and feet. But today, "growing up" comes from her son. Chi Mei felt a little reluctant for the first time, and that kind of anxiety may not be what she really thought.

Chimei brought the door, and the ring made of colored silk thread flashed a little fluorescence between her fingers. Thousands of small lights outside the window, embedded in a dark building, stood on the wall, pulling Chimera back to the university. Downstairs in the dormitory, Xiang Jun and Qi Mei go to dinner together. At the dinner table, he will draw a circle with water in it. In class, Xiang Jun and Qi Mei study together, practice a page in the book, draw a circle and wrap it with exquisite patterns; At the school gate, Xiang Jun and Qi Mei go for an outing together. Only that time, the "ring" woven by Setaria viridis was worn on Qi Mei's white finger. Wait and wait, Qi Mei and others came to the confession of the army: the heart-shaped shape surrounded by 99 candles, the fragrance of 99 roses, and so on.

five

The milky yellow light trickled down from the bedside lamp, like a soft satin, slipping and stroking, wrapping the high desk lamp rack and desktop. Qi Mei's eyes rested on the photo: the smoky wind of the Republic of China was one of the wedding photos. A young woman with a high bun, holding a melon face at the neckline of a cheongsam, can't hide the bitterness in her eyebrows, the longing that can't be erased from her eyes, staring at a rose, a few petals falling, touching the ancient and clear wood grain on the table, an abandoned railway approaching and far away, and a tired man at the end of the road.

10 years ago, as soon as Qi Mei entered the studio, she immediately fell in love with the faint sadness and unspeakable feelings emitted by the sample, and so did she and Xiang Jun. I remember that when shooting, the photographer's feelings were different. Qi Mei seamlessly enters the role, paints her sadness on her brow, grinds her endless thoughts into fine powder and scatters it on her porcelain surface, leaving the only sad photo in the festival.

The brown photo frame reveals the dullness of wood, which adds to the loss of women waiting. Now it seems that maybe ten years ago, when the shutter was pressed, waiting for marriage was like water on wool paper, which infiltrated and spread quietly in an unimaginable way, and the hidden hints had already been fixed in the photo.

Leaning on the soft cushion, stretching his legs and reading a book half an hour before going to bed is the time when Qi Mei most hopes to cry and be happy with the people in the book. Only this alone time can make her quiet, peaceful and secure.

Ha Jin is waiting, lying on the bedside table. In the bookstore, Qi Mei was attracted by the two words on the cover at a glance. White characters on a dark background, like a knife, are horizontal and vertical, meticulous, and deliberately short and long. Waiting, shouldn't it be wrapped in forbearance in softness? Keep a straight face, don't be indifferent, the coolness behind your neck is sudden. What do you think is a showdown? Sudden two points, like a lonely heart, are placed between empty doorposts, and I don't know what I am waiting for, and I don't know what I am waiting for.

The old story will never happen again now. Living in the Present has questioned the so-called "love" at that time, and people who are in a hurry have already calculated the price of waiting. Chi Mei is not that simple. There must be an unknown difficulty behind those waits: what is Shuyu waiting for? Did Kong Lin get what he expected? Wu Manna's enthusiasm and youth were exhausted in the waiting.

In life and marriage, we are either waiting for this or that. Complexity gives birth to the fine density of waiting, anxiety increases the tension of waiting, uncertainty exposes the helplessness of waiting, waiting becomes the norm, but what we are waiting for has changed.

The door lock is "click, click, click" again, and at the same time it is the mother-in-law's words: he won't, just wait for him.

The book in his hand fell to the ground, and in the darkness, two small animals were frightened and at a loss, and reluctantly dodged back, which were two points on the word "wait". Just now, in my dream, my mother-in-law told me the experience of an experiencer: big boy, I have a big heart to play, and I can't stop after thirty.