Xiao Shenyang's essay "New Shanghai Beach" has subtitles ~ 200 points ~ Don't link ~ What you want is text ~ ~ ~

20 10 Beijing TV Spring Festival Gala sketch "New Shanghai Beach" Shenyang Shen Chunyang

Shenyang: It's really kind to stand on the stage of Beijing TV's Spring Festival Gala again. I'm still so excited. Because Beijing is different from other places and can stand on this stage, my mother always tells me, son, go to Beijing and do well, because Beijing is not far from the capital. My mother loved me very much when I was a child, and I was very talented when I was a child. Why do you think I'm talented? I don't envy anyone now, my friends. I envy myself. Sometimes I kowtow to myself in the mirror. I thought, why am I so talented? The year before last, last year, I ate 108 jiaozi for 30 nights, and I couldn't sleep, so I thought, why can't I sleep? Then I thought I was full! (Laughter) (Applause) I think it's brilliant! I must work hard tonight, my good friends. If you want to see it, I'll put it on longer tonight, because it's the Spring Festival! Ok, thank you! (Shen Chunyang takes the stage) (Little Shenyang to the man in the audience) Stop, stop, stop! Respect my fans. Let her in. Let's go (Shenyang vs Shen Chunyang) Thank you. Ok. (Little Shenyang hugs Shen Chunyang) (Audience laughs) (Applause) Thank you, and thank you for your encouragement of flowers. (Little Shenyang laughs) (Shen Chunyang gets off) Let's play for a while! (Shen Chunyang appears again) (Laughter from the audience) (Applause) Why did you really come back? (laughter) (applause) (applause)

Shenyang: No, sister, I'm kidding you!

Shen Chunyang: Then I'm serious. (Laughter from the audience) (Applause) (Little Shenyang is helpless)

Shenyang: Are you serious? Really can't. I have to perform. I have to do this.

Shen Chunyang: You play your part. I looked around. (Laughter from the audience) (Applause) (Little Shenyang has no choice but to look at the flowers)

Shenyang: Thank you for your encouragement. This color is quite yellow. (Laughter) (Applause)

Shen Chunyang: Why, you don't like it.

Shenyang: Not so interesting. I like it.

Shen Chunyang: Then you don't like me. What else is there?

Shenyang: And flowers! (presenting white flowers) This white one! Sister, does your family belong to a flower shop?

Shen Chunyang: Oh, how do you know?

Shenyang: Really?

Shen Chunyang: Really, from my wreath shop! (Laughter) (Applause)

Shenyang: You are so humorous!

Shen Chunyang: I'm serious.

Shenyang: Seriously! Come on, friends, how about a round of applause? (Applause)

Shen Chunyang: What is farewell?

Shenyang: No, just now,

Shen Chunyang: I haven't planned to go down since I came here today! (Applause)

Shenyang: I don't know what you mean.

Shen Chunyang: I, I just want to perform with you.

Shenyang: Thank you, Sister. I really appreciate it． Thank you again for your encouragement with flowers. Thank you for always supporting me and tolerating me.

Shen Chunyang: I can tolerate you, really. I scolded you online. I never leave my name. (Laughter) (Applause) (Little Shenyang is helpless)

Shenyang: I know who scolded me. You want to perform a program with me, but I am willing to interact with the masses. Play one, play one.

Shen Chunyang: Then give me a chance.

Small Shenyang: The audience encouraged her. (Applause) It's the Spring Festival.

Shen Chunyang: Thank you.

Shenyang: Since you like me so much, I will play with you.

Shen Chunyang: OK.

Shenyang: Next, I have a program with songs. That song is quite difficult. Dao Lang sang Love is You and Me. Have you ever heard that song?

Shen Chunyang: Yes,

Shenyang: That song is very high. It's similar to Qinghai-Tibet Plateau, a song sung with girls. Can you sing?

Shen Chunyang: Nothing. If I can't get up, I'll come down! (Laughter) (Applause) I really can't. Please help me move a stool. I stood on the stool and sang.

Small Shenyang: The loss is singing high songs. If you want to hum, you have to dig a hole to sing. We sing this song, but it's boring to sing it before singing it. Let's make a show, like MTV. Will you, sister?

Shen Chunyang: Huh? Still filming MTV?

Shenyang: Yes! An MTV about love. Look what I'm playing, Shanghai Beach.

Shen Chunyang: I can't act.

Shenyang: You can play what I told you. You can play Feng Chengcheng. They will call each other and shoot a scene.

Shen Chunyang: Oh, my God.

Shenyang: Is that all right?

Shen Chunyang: OK.

Shenyang: I'll put the flowers here first. Give me the background music of Shanghai beach. Well, a little.

Shen Chunyang: There is music.

Shenyang: Call. Yes, you must.

Shen Chunyang: Yes. Hmm? What about me? My cell phone?

Small Shenyang: Good at measuring.

Shen Chunyang: Why did you take the real thing? I have to measure it.

Shenyang: No, just for show.

Shen Chunyang: Call me, too.

Shenyang: Are you serious? So what? I'm just a guy. (To the photographer) Dude, the cameraman, I'm talking about you. Please answer my phone. Action, action. Saving the scene is like putting out a fire, man, please. I wish you a happy new year. I'll borrow it. (Photographer: Give it back to me after use) Nothing, nothing. Acting, grinding, nothing, nothing.

Shen Chunyang: Thank you.

Shenyang: I lent it to you.

Shen Chunyang: That's very kind of you.

Shenyang: Come on, let's get into the role. The background music began.

Shen Chunyang: Come on.

Shenyang: Hello. Hello.

Shen Chunyang: Why is there no caller ID here?

Shenyang: Fake, fake. Hello.

Shen Chunyang: Hello.

Shenyang: Cheng Cheng?

Shen Chunyang: It's me.

Shenyang: I'm Xu Wenqiang.

Shen Chunyang: Brother Qiang.

Shenyang: What are you doing?

Shen Chunyang: I'm picking corn.

Small Shenyang: What corn to pick at this time?

Shen Chunyang: Then I have nothing to do.

Shenyang: Spring Festival is coming in winter. Relax and have some fun.

Shen Chunyang: Play, play what?

Little Shenyang: Playing mahjong.

Shen Chunyang: Playing mahjong. I didn't call.

Shenyang: You are Feng Chengcheng now. You are very valuable. Play and relax when you are free.

Shen Chunyang: Who am I going to play with?

Shenyang: Do you like stars?

Shen Chunyang: Yes.

Shenyang: You can choose any star you like. Pick whatever you want,

Shen Chunyang: Yes, yes.

Shenyang: Cheng Cheng?

Shen Chunyang: It's me.

Shenyang: What are you doing?

Shen Chunyang: I'm playing mahjong.

Little Shenyang: With whom?

Shen Chunyang: There are Brigitte Lin, Gong Li and Cecilia Cheung. (Laughter) (Applause)

Shenyang: How big is it?

Shen Chunyang: A two-dollar bill. (Audience laughs)

Shenyang: These two people are so hard, you should speak louder!

Shen Chunyang: No, they are all occupied.

Shenyang: Now that you are in Feng Chengcheng, your value is different, understand?

Shen Chunyang: Is it bigger?

Shenyang: Speak louder, speak louder. Cheng cheng?

Shen Chunyang: Brother Qiang.

Shenyang: How old do you play?

Shen Chunyang: I want two and a half. (Laughter) (Applause) Dozens of them straightened up.

Small Shenyang: It has gone up by 50 cents. Can't you blow? Blow it up, the bigger the better. I can't play yet. Cheng cheng? How old do you play?

Shen Chunyang: A billion dollars will float several billion dollars. (Laughter) (Applause)

Shenyang: Are you playing with the terrifying?

Shen Chunyang: There are three short positions and one short position. Are you coming?

Shenyang: There is no such thing. Love never fails

Shen Chunyang: Brother Qiang.

Shenyang: Where are you?

Shen Chunyang: Where am I? Then where are you?

Shenyang: I watched the snow in Sanya. (Laughter) (Applause)

Shen Chunyang: Brother Qiang, I am also in Sanya.

Shenyang: What are you doing?

Shen Chunyang: I'm making a snowman.

Small Shenyang: Cheng Cheng.

Shen Chunyang: Brother Qiang.

Small Shenyang: Cheng Cheng.

Shen Chunyang: Brother Qiang.

Shenyang: I'm looking at you.

Shen Chunyang: Brother Qiang.

Small Shenyang: Cheng Cheng. (Dropping mobile phone)

Shen Chunyang: A Qiang. (slamming the phone) (Laughter from the audience) (Applause) (Cell phone battery dropped) (Little Shenyang picks up the phone)

Shenyang: I dropped the battery. (Laughter) (Applause)

Shen Chunyang: Don't you want me to learn from you?

Shenyang: What you have is real. You really are my real mother. (Laughter) (Applause)

Shen Chunyang: Then you can't agree. (Laughter) (Applause)

Shenyang: (to the photographer) Your heart is broken like this. Why don't you take that picture? It's okay, man. I'll buy you one. What about more than ten thousand? Shanzhai, there you are. 1000 yuan.

Shen Chunyang: How do you know?

Shenyang: I bought it with his daughter-in-law. I don't know. Sample.

Shen Chunyang: Brother. I'm sorry

Little Shenyang: Get into the show. Don't break it into success.

Shen Chunyang: Brother Qiang.

Small Shenyang: Cheng Cheng.

Shen Chunyang: Brother Qiang.

Small Shenyang: Cheng Cheng.

Shen Chunyang: Brother Qiang.

Shenyang: I think,

Shen Chunyang: Do you have anything to say?

Shenyang: You stepped on my foot. (Laughter) (Applause)

Shen Chunyang: Leather!

Small Shenyang: Cheng Cheng.

Shen Chunyang: Brother Qiang.

Shenyang: I'll take you out of Shanghai. Come with me to Hong Kong and Macao.

Shen Chunyang: Brother Qiang, I can't go with you.

Shenyang: Why?

Shen Chunyang: Because I don't have a Hong Kong and Macao pass. (Laughter) (Applause)

Shenyang: Great. Love never fails

Shen Chunyang: Brother Qiang.

Shenyang: Don't you want to say something? I have a lot to say to you.

Shen Chunyang: Is the pass ready?

Shenyang: I can't.

Shen Chunyang: I hate you.

Shenyang: I love you. (Love is you and me) Love is a life intertwined with your heart. Love is a promise between you and me to share weal and woe. Love is the pain that your hand touches me. Love is listening attentively to your sadness and happiness. I have come to this world to make the storm spin.

Shen Chunyang: This is your promise of love, which makes me feel sunny. Love hugged me and I could feel his touch. Even though life has given me endless pain, I still feel happier.

Shen Chunyang from Shenyang: I feel happier. (Applause)

Shenyang: Thank you. Happy new year. Goodbye.

Shen Chunyang: Let's have another drink.

Shenyang: I went home to cook. She is my daughter-in-law

Shen Chunyang: Let's have another drink.

Shenyang: Let's go.