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Loneliness and security of being single and living alone
We are entering the era of living alone
In 221, it was reported that there were 92 million people living alone in China, and the single population exceeded 24 million. The proportion of one-person households in China has increased from 6% in 199 to 15% in 214 and 25% in 221. Now it is rapidly entering the era of living alone.
The people who choose to live alone are: empty-nesters who leave their hometown to work in big cities, divorced single men and women, elderly people who live alone, single young people who voluntarily leave their parents to live alone, and neets.
Empty-nesters in 1 big cities
The cities in the north, Guangzhou and Shenzhen have the highest proportion of living alone, and most of them are empty-nesters who live away from home. Compared with small towns, big cities have independent interpersonal relationships, more inclusive lifestyles and stronger personalities. Coupled with the urbanization process, many young people from other places seek development in big cities, so the proportion of people living alone in big cities is higher.
2 single trend
? Modern people's demand for fertility has decreased, so has the demand for marriage system, and the role of marriage is weakening.
? Compared with the agricultural society, people are more multifaceted, more differentiated, more individual, have higher requirements for their partners, and it is more difficult to achieve long-term stability. The sense of belonging to the family has faded.
3 Divorced Single
During the 35 years from 1985 to 22, the divorce rate of the total population increased from .4% to 3.1%. The number of divorced singles is increasing.
4 The role of the family is weakened
? Family-based social life is the main form of human existence for tens of thousands of years. Living in groups for safety, collective hunting and division of labor get food.
? Now we are not so dependent on family, and we can get it from enterprises, institutions, friends, communities, informal organizations, hobbies, small circles, online social circles and so on. Intimacy can be transferred from family to pets and robots. The sense of belonging to the family extends to others: social organizations, hobby circles, online circles, informal organizations, communities, etc.
5 free lifestyle
? People's personality is getting stronger and stronger, and their lifestyles are getting different. Living alone is a more free lifestyle. And the social culture is more inclusive.
Loneliness of being single and living alone
But those who live alone will definitely face more life and emotional difficulties. The loneliness of people living alone is significantly higher than that of the general population. The research in 218 shows that people living alone have four psychological problems: great psychological pressure, strong loneliness, lack of security and strong sense of loss. Common problems are:
1. Extra pressure from parents. Let go home from a big city, not recognize career development, hope to take care of parents, and urge marriage.
2. I don't have deep contact with colleagues, but I often contact colleagues, but I don't have deep contacts.
3. Less community support, frequent take-out;
4. Lack of confidants; ? Lack of emotional confidants, channels for emotional venting and emotional sustenance.
5. Face-to-face interaction with others is rare, and the actual social circle is narrow, relying too much on the Internet, television, electronic products and online social interaction.
6. There is no one to take care of and rely on when injured.
the sense of security of being single and living alone
1 the sense of security of life
? Living alone often needs to worry about safety, especially for women.
going out at night, knocking at the door by strangers, being followed, entry maintenance, forced entry by delivery, and being isolated and helpless due to injuries. ?
2 psychological security
because of the lack of dependent objects to live with, solitary people are prone to anxiety, stress and lack of security. Foreign research shows that the prevalence rate of mental illness of solitary people is higher than that of other people. It has been studied that the probability of psychological problems in solitary people is 16% that in other people; According to Finnish research, the proportion of people who live alone buying antidepressants is 18% of those who live with their families.
How to improve personal safety
The personal safety of people living alone can be improved by some outside help and safety awareness, such as:
1. Install cameras and alarms;
? 2. Online shopping recipients don't write their real names;
? 3. Women hang men's clothes on the balcony and put men's shoes at the door; You can call to pretend that your boyfriend is coming back when you come to repair;
4. Anti-wolf spray, pepper spray; Baseball bat;
? 5. Put medicine bottles of infectious diseases at home, such as AIDS medicine bottles and infectious disease diagnosis reports. In case of infringement, you can consider giving it a try; Prepare a common medicine box.
6. Living in a relatively safe community. If the rent of a good community is high, you can also consider the dormitory of some units or the old community with housing distribution, and the residents are simple; The elevator has a camera; There are security guards at the door;
? 7. Get to know the community. Know the people upstairs and downstairs across the hall, but don't necessarily mean living alone. There are telephone numbers of the property, neighborhood committees and police stations in the jurisdiction; Learn to call the police by SMS;
8. The door is bolted separately. Voice changer Turn into a male voice and answer the knock of an unknown person.
How to improve psychological security and reduce loneliness
Besides personal security, psychological security and loneliness have greater influence.
People who live alone sometimes turn on the TV instead of watching it, just to feel accompanied.
first, keep a pet
? Pets have become an important companion in people's life to alleviate loneliness.
? Keep cats, dogs, birds, turtles, rabbits, hamsters, fish and so on. The best interaction is the dog, and those who can walk the dog can have a dog. ?
? Keeping a pet can reduce depression and benefit the body and mind. See the article "Emotional Management 2" for details.
second, exercise relief
? Exercise is helpful for mood. Find a sport you like, and it is best to do outdoor activities often. The sunshine in the park environment can improve your mood.
Third, cultivate hobbies. Join a small group
Cultivate one or two hobbies. In addition to calming your mind and body, you can also communicate with similar people online or offline through hobbies, or join a small group here. Such as donkey friends, photography enthusiasts, cooking hobbies, walking dogs and so on.
Fourth, strengthen the social support system
? Social support includes family support, social support, friendship, colleagues and community relations, informal organizations, small group support and so on. Western churches also belong to a kind of social support.
? Many studies have shown that the more social support you get, the lower your loneliness and the higher your life satisfaction. And social support plays an obvious role in relieving psychological pressure and eliminating psychological obstacles.
? People in big cities are increasingly alienated and have fewer relatives. Find social organizations from different communities and informal organizations. But also helpful for a sense of belonging and security.
When people are under great psychological pressure, people with high social support are more likely to communicate with others, and in the process, they will feel the care and warmth of others, so as to face them more positively and optimistically. People living alone have great psychological pressure, insecurity and loneliness, and their psychological state can be improved by improving social support.
how to improve social support
since social support can reduce loneliness, improve subjective well-being, and play an obvious role in relieving psychological pressure and eliminating psychological barriers, how can we improve the quality of social relations and strengthen social support?
1.? Cultivate a sunny way of thinking with positive focus; Because the negative focus is more likely to be anxious;
2. Pay more, complain less, be brave in action, and be brave in helping others without feeling great pressure. Helping others more will also increase the probability that others will help you.
3.? Learn to encourage intimacy; Parents, close friends and close colleagues give more positive encouragement.
4.? Be filled with gratitude, and gratitude will strengthen the motivation of people around you to help you.
5.? Don't expect others to be grateful. I hope that gratitude from others will affect my subjective well-being.
6. ? Learn some psychological knowledge and know people better. Because a big trouble for people is people with excessive negative energy around them, such as people who accuse themselves of personality and have too high views on right and wrong in life, and make friends with men and women with extreme personalities.
original link: loneliness and security of being single and living alone.
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