Grandpa, I miss you. Celebrity stories

In early March 2013, when her first collection of prose essays "Grandpa" met readers, Jiang Wenli accepted an interview from a special reporter of this magazine. She said: "Grandpa is like a big tree, but I am like a small tree. The small tree slowly grows up, but the big tree no longer towers over the sky and blocks out the sun, but collapses under the wind and rain. For a certain Relatives who have passed away but you cannot forget, I want to say that I am living well in this world today, not just so that we can meet in heaven one day, but also so that we can get along better with our parents, partners, children and ourselves today. , Meet."

As early as 2009, actor Jiang Wenli wrote and directed the film "We Meet in the Sky" for the first time, telling the story of her family relationship with her grandfather. It won the first prize at the Busan Film Festival in South Korea before it was released in China. "Most Favorite Movie Award". After the film was released in China in April 2010, it moved hundreds of millions of viewers. Why did Jiang Wenli invest so much effort into adapting an ordinary family story about two generations in Bengbu, Anhui Province, into a movie and later a book that happened in the 1960s and 1970s? What kind of warm and unforgettable past does this famous actor who has already become famous internationally have with his grandfather?

Her childhood with her grandpa was not lonely.

Jiang Wenli said: Because of her grandpa’s company and care, her childhood was much warmer and happier than other children. And those beautiful and precious years have become the best shot in the arm in her life. She said: "Whenever I recall the scenes of my childhood, I feel extremely warm and peaceful in my heart. In that special era, we didn't have so much to eat and drink, but life was so happy!"

My father works in Xinjiang, and in order to take care of my grandfather, my mother has stayed in Bengbu, Anhui. The couple has been together for 15 years. As long as Jiang Wenli can remember, she has known that her father can only go back to Bengbu once a year, and her mother works three shifts, so she is often away from home. Jiang Wenli said that when she was a child, she wanted to be with her mother unless she was sick and had to take sick leave at home.

When Jiang Wenli was born, her grandfather was already 81 years old. Because her mother was busy with work and she had two older sisters to take care of, Jiang Wenli started living with her grandfather when she was half a year old. In the 12 years until his death, she had never been separated from her grandfather. When her mother finally got home, she wanted Jiang Wenli to talk and sleep with her, but she was unwilling to do so. Her mother had to wait for her to fall asleep and secretly carry her to her room. Unexpectedly, Jiang Wenli would wake up in the middle of the night and sneak back to her grandfather's room.

When Jiang Wenli was more than 3 years old, her mother decided to send her to kindergarten in order to get rid of her dependence on her grandfather. Jiang Wenli was unwilling to go. In order to resist, she cried for a whole day. The grandfather couldn't bear to see his granddaughter. He was afraid that her health would be broken by crying, so he begged his daughter: "I should take care of her. You are busy with your work, and I promise not to spoil her." Finally, Jiang Wenli's mother listened to her grandfather's words and refused. Send her to kindergarten.

But when Jiang Wenli was 6 years old, her mother insisted that she go to an amateur sports school to learn gymnastics. In my mother's opinion, girls practicing gymnastics can not only make their bodies toned, but also develop their hard-working spirit. But her grandfather felt that gymnastics was too hard and didn't want her to go. This time, Jiang Wenli’s mother was very insistent. On her first day at the sports school, her grandfather sent Jiang Wenli there. Watching her enter the gymnastics room, her grandfather was still unwilling to leave and watched eagerly outside the door. "When I started practicing, the teacher pulled me over and spread my legs forcefully. He told me that this was called 'leg pressing'. It hurt. I can't forget it to this day." Jiang Wenli said that she cried in the practice room that day. The sound made the grandfather outside the door very worried. The always cheerful grandpa wiped his tears and turned away sadly.

The summer in Bengbu is very hot, and my grandpa’s house does not have air conditioning or fans. When it was particularly hot, Jiang Wenli encouraged her grandpa to move the bed to the yard. On a starry night, Jiang Wenli sat on a small stool, beating her grandfather's back and fanning him while he was lying on the bamboo bed. When the surroundings were silent, she would cuddle up next to her grandpa and listen to him tell the story of the origin of the Milky Way and the Cowherd and the Weaver Girl. Jiang Wenli said that she was young at that time and didn't know what love was, but she never tired of hearing the story of the Cowherd and the Weaver Girl, and she was moved to tears every time.

Grandpa asked her why she kept crying? Jiang Wenli said she felt that the Cowherd and the Weaver Girl were very pitiful and could only see each other once a year, but what she was thinking in her heart was: Why is it so difficult for her to see her parents? Is there a Milky Way between me and them?

When the weather is cool, grandpa likes to sit on the bamboo chair in the yard and sleep. But Jiang Wenli wouldn't let him sleep peacefully. She always ran over and sat on his lap, asking tirelessly: "Grandpa, do you like me more, or do you like your sisters more?" At this time, grandpa would He stretched out his arms to make symbolic gestures, and used the distance between his arms to compare the extent of his love for Jiang Wenli and his sisters. When talking about Jiang Wenli, she opens her arms very wide. This made Jiang Wenli feel that her grandfather used his arms to show how much he loved her, which was so warm and powerful...

Jiang Wenli's family conditions were average, but her grandfather was very willing to give to her. Few of her classmates had pocket money, but her grandfather often put a few cents in her pocket. Whenever the school organized outings, other students' lunch boxes were filled with steamed buns and pickles, but Jiang Wenli brought fried rice with eggs.

"Occasionally, there is my favorite braised pork!" Jiang Wenli said that because of her grandfather's love, her food and clothing expenses in elementary school were the envy of other classmates.

Bengbu has a lot of rain and mosquitoes in the summer, so whenever Jiang Wenli does her homework, her grandfather will sit next to her and use a cattail leaf fan to fan her and drive away the mosquitoes. When she finished her homework, Jiang Wenli looked up at her grandfather and saw sweat trickling like a stream in his furrowed wrinkles. Jiang Wenli raised her little hand to wipe her grandfather's sweat. As she wiped it, she said, "Grandpa, when I grow up, I will fan you and support you."

Grandpa said slowly: "Silly My child, when you grow up, grandpa will already be watching you in heaven. "At that time, grandpa had something elusive to Jiang Wenli. Grandpa touched the corner of the table and continued, "Child, grandpa wishes you could grow up to be this tall and never grow up! In this way, you can always be with grandpa..." Jiang Wenli laughed and said, "That won't work. , If I don’t grow up, how can I make money to buy delicious food to support you?”

Some people have some love that can never be replaced.

Back then, Jiang Wenli applied for Beijing. At the film school, during the interview, the teacher asked her to tell an unforgettable story and an unforgettable person. The first thing Jiang Wenli thought of was her last meeting with her grandfather. The teachers present burst into tears after listening to her story. It was also at that moment that Jiang Wenli finally understood that no matter how long they leave you or how far they go, some people will always be deeply, deeply imprinted in your heart, and no one can replace them...

In my mother’s opinion, my grandfather doted on Jiang Wenli too much. But Jiang Wenli knew that her grandfather was also very strict when it came to matters of principle. Grandpa had a ruler, which he rarely used. If Jiang Wenli lied or did something wrong, he would take out the ruler and hit her palm.

I remember one time on the way to school, Jiang Wenli went to the canteen with her classmates. She fell in love with a beautiful hairdo, but she was afraid that her grandpa would not pay for it. So after returning home, she lied to her grandfather and said that the teacher asked her to pay 50 cents. The granddaughter had never lied, so the grandfather gave her 50 cents without saying a word. The next day, she spent 50 cents to buy the beautiful head flower. After school that day, Jiang Wenli noticed that her grandfather looked ugly. She was so frightened that she burst into tears. This was revealed. Sure enough, grandpa took out the ruler and said sternly: "Stretch out your hands!" Jiang Wenli stretched out her hands and cried while being beaten: "Grandpa, I was wrong." Afterwards, grandpa said to her sincerely: "My child, grandpa I don’t want to beat you, and I’m not reluctant to give you money. Grandpa is angry with you for lying. You must not develop a bad habit of lying. My child, you can’t lie for the rest of your life.”

In Jiang Wenli’s memory, Grandpa is also very tidy, and the cement floor in the room is always kept spotless. Even when the grandfather and grandson are eating, my grandfather is very particular about it. If there is some oil soup on the side of the plate, my grandfather will wipe it off bit by bit before serving it to the table.

Grandpa likes flowers, and there are flowers blooming in the yard all year round. What impressed Jiang Wenli was not only the indescribable variety of gorgeous flowers, but also the clean appearance and corners of each flower pot. Even every leaf of every flower and plant was carefully wiped clean by my grandfather. The garden full of flowers brought infinite fragrance and fun to Jiang Wenli’s childhood. Whenever she finished her homework, she rushed to help her grandfather fertilize and water the garden. Grandpa also likes to keep fish. He has a large fish tank at home with many fish swimming around in it. Every spring, many small fish fry suddenly appear in the fish tank. Jiang Wenli was responsible for fishing out the small fry and putting them in another basin. As she fished them out, she said to her grandfather: "Grandpa, I have to rescue these small fish quickly, otherwise they will be eaten by the big fish." As for fish food, They were small bugs and duckweeds that she and her grandfather went to fish for in the pond.

My grandfather often told Jiang Wenli that seeing these green flowers and plants and fresh fish made him feel happy every day. Grandpa also told her that a person's life experiences are like flowers and plants, they bloom sometimes, but they are always short-lived. Therefore, for a longer period of time in life, we must grow silently and tenaciously like those flowers and plants.

Jiang Wenli seemed to understand what her grandfather said, but as she grew older, especially after becoming famous, she finally understood the truth her grandfather told her, and she was very grateful that when she was very young, Her grandfather taught her to be normal in the face of success and failure.

Jiang Wenli said: "I was happy and warm when I was with my grandpa. If I was bullied by my classmates at school or criticized by the teacher in the gymnastics room, I would never tell my parents, Instead, she went home right away. As long as she stayed quietly with her grandpa, she would feel particularly safe and warm, and her unhappiness would be forgotten. "At a young age, she often prayed to God, hoping that her grandpa would always stay with her and let her. Growing old with my grandpa...

When Jiang Wenli was born, my grandpa was 81 years old. But in Jiang Wenli's eyes, grandpa is not old at all and is still very handsome. She never thought that one day, her grandfather would leave her forever. Until one day when I was 12 years old, my grandfather was suddenly hospitalized and stayed there for many days. As a little girl, she had no special feelings about life and death, so she happily performed somersaults for her grandfather in the ward. When my grandfather became more and more frail, she would wash his face and feed him while wiping away his tears.

After my grandpa fell ill, my mother and eldest sister returned home and took turns taking care of him in the hospital. At that time, Jiang Wenli was facing her final exams, so she listened to her grandfather and did not go to the hospital to see him for more than a week. She took it for granted that her grandfather would be fine after staying in the hospital for a few days, and then she could go home and continue to accompany her. After all, my 93-year-old grandpa still looks so tough.

One afternoon, two aunts came to the house and said they were going to the hospital to see her grandfather. Jiang Wenli, who was doing her homework, clamored to go with them. Jiang Wenli still remembers it clearly: that was the last time she and her grandfather met. When Jiang Wenli walked into her grandfather's ward, she stood still and opened her mouth in surprise. Who is the haggard old man in front of me with an oxygen mask on his face? There were tubes inserted everywhere in his body, his mouth was open, and his lips were painted with ugly purple liquid; his thin limbs were fixed to the bed frame...

When her mother told her, the person on the bed was really When it was her grandpa, Jiang Wenli immediately knelt on the floor and started crying. I haven’t seen you for a week. Why did grandpa become like this? Why doesn't he open his eyes and look at himself? She cried heartbrokenly, and her aunt told her: If her tears fell on her grandpa, he would not be able to go to heaven. Jiang Wenli had no choice but to stop crying immediately. Then, many people came to the ward, and everyone went to shake my grandpa’s hand, but he didn’t respond at all. Jiang Wenli was the last one to walk up. When she held her grandfather's hand, his grandfather immediately grabbed her hand tightly. Jiang Wenli raised her head and saw a tear falling from the corner of her grandfather's eye...

For the first time, 12-year-old Jiang Wenli experienced the heartbreaking and helpless separation between life and death...

Grandpa, we See you in the sky

In 2009, when Jiang Wenli's movie "See you in the sky" premiered in Shenzhen, an audience member said to her: "Our love is downward, and we love our children. Love their children. But you are looking back and repaying grandpa. This is a kind of upward love, which is rare. "She said: "Loving children is instinctive, but loving parents is a responsibility and needs to be inspired. Planting upward love will make us more peaceful and happy, because the children will see from me how to treat parents and the elderly. In this way, the virtues of filial piety and feedback will be passed on..."

After her grandfather passed away, no matter how busy or tired she was, Jiang Wenli would take time to go back to her hometown every year and visit her grandfather’s grave. After getting married, her husband Gu Changwei would accompany her whenever he had time. When she came to her grandfather's grave, Jiang Wenli felt surprisingly calm. She quietly told her thoughts and her joys and sorrows over the years. At the end of the story, Jiang Wenli will burst into tears. She said: "I don't know why, but every time I stand in front of my grandfather's tombstone, I feel like I have returned to my childhood. I have become that 12-year-old girl, crying when I feel wronged and sad, and laughing when I am excited and proud. Unscrupulous... At that moment, I believed that my grandpa was alive. He would listen to me carefully, care for me as always, and guide me when I was confused. ”

After marrying Gu Changwei. , and soon the son was born. Because she grew up with her grandfather when she was a child, Jiang Wenli also wanted to leave her son to her parents. But when the child was born and saw his invincible cuteness, she and Gu Changwei unanimously decided that no matter how tired or busy they were, they would take care of the child by themselves. Today, Jiang Wenli's parents live with her eldest sister. Although they can see each other often, their son's time with his grandparents is limited after all. Therefore, when Jiang Wenli accompanied him to watch the movie "We Will Meet in Heaven", his son still could not fully understand Jiang Wenli's feelings for her grandfather.

But when his son found out that the little girl in the movie was his mother, he curiously asked: "Mom, were you like this when you were a child? It turned out that living with your grandpa was so happy!" Since then, Jiang Wenli was surprised to find that when she saw her grandpa again, the little guy always followed him. He said: "Grandpa is the best person in the world, and I want to spend more time with him!"

"Childhood is It doesn’t matter who is with you during the most important time in everyone’s life. What matters is that that person will always be with you and be willing to listen to your sorrows and share your happiness!” Jiang Wenli said, because Grandpa, her childhood was as beautiful as a dream.

Jiang Wenli said that the reason why she misses her grandfather so much is not only the good time he spent with her, but also because those simple and beautiful old days are gone forever. Many sounds from my childhood can no longer be heard now: the sound of trains whizzing past the window every few minutes; the long shouts of scissors grinders, cotton players, and sellers; the cries of cicadas and crickets. There was grandpa's warning... these sounds became a dream with grandpa's departure.

Childhood has become a dream, and spending time with my grandpa day and night has also become a dream. However, the principles her grandfather taught her: never lie in your life, don’t do to others what you don’t want others to do to you, and respect others as much as you respect me, are deeply engraved in my heart. That's why she spent so much time and energy making movies for her grandfather and writing books for him.

Jiang Wenli also wanted to express another meaning through this book: "Look at when we were children, the rainwater collected under the eaves could be used to wash rice, but now the pollution of tap water is terrifying; when we were children, we ate organic food, so we In an era of material poverty, my grandfather could still live to the age of 93! Now that we have abundant material resources, people's happiness is deteriorating.

Therefore, I especially hope that the book "Grandpa" can make busy people stop, look back at the path we have taken before, find a moment of peace, and return to our past lives, where the most important thing in our lives can be revealed. People, feel free to pour out your thoughts, sorrows and dreams..."

At this moment, Jiang Wenli's quiet time is to stop her busy steps, let her heart become quiet and gentle, and then face the hometown direction, closed his eyes, and said softly in his heart: "Grandpa, see you in the sky!" ”