We study ourselves to forget ourselves.

"We study ourselves in order to forget ourselves in the end" is a sentence that Suzuki Longji said. This is a very high realm, and many of us have been pursuing it all our lives, but we can't reach it.

Annie Baby said that writing is just a road for her, and on this road, she tries to discover and discover herself. This is similar to "we study ourselves and eventually forget ourselves", and the truth of the two is basically the same.

I understand that forgetting myself is not really forgetting, but after reaching a certain level, I am no longer me, but my state. This seems profound, but it's actually very simple. Each of us has more than one side, different ages and different stages, which will change more or less, and these changes will make our former self no longer the same, which is not a sense of forgetfulness.

Forget the hidden parts of the past and form a new self. And those forgotten may just exist in another form. But in the eyes of reality, nature is forgotten.

2065438+June 2004, Anne Baby published the first book collection of essays under the pseudonym of Qingshan.

From the second half of 20 13 to 20 14, Anne Baby made a long-distance trip consisting of many segments, and directly met and intersected with four other people and wrote a book. The name of this book is "Wade once had", which comes from Buddhist scriptures: Wade once had a pure heart and enthusiasm.

Because of this trip, Annie got to know some friends and teachers. At the same time, I decided to change my pen name, Qingshan. She said: "With the present state and state of mind, you can have a new name. The name is very simple, learn more at the meeting. "

Annie Baby's trip starts from Beijing, arrives, comes back and starts again ... In this cycle, the route extends from Jiangnan to Gansu, and she meets four people she has never met before.

0 1 A chef who loves painting and is good at cooking advocates his diet.

"Life can be very comfortable. We don't need to eat big fish and meat every day. Our happiness and enjoyment can come from very small things. " This is the preface and summary written by Anne Baby for the first trip. She named this trip "Picking Flowers for Spring".

Maybe we should start calling her Jingshan. According to her own words, the name Anne has been integrated into the name "Castle Peak" and has its own place.

Qingshan met chef Liu Hanlin at a family dinner. Liu Hanlin used a table of seasonal home-cooked dishes as raw materials, cooked dishes in an original ecological way, and a pot of homemade wine. When everyone drinks tea together, they always get up and add water to others, leaving an impression on Qingshan. Knowing Qingshan's birthday in July, he promised to cook a table for her, and the two became attached.

One day in September, the two met in Hangzhou and went to the drunken deer together. Two people talked a lot, mainly Liu Hanlin talking and Qingshan listening. Liu Hanlin talked about himself and drunkenness, expressing his attitude towards cooking and life and his yearning for the garden. Qingshan sometimes asks questions, and the conversation between them is very pleasant.

Drunk Lu's life is very leisurely, and everyone yearns for it, but few people can give up the city's glitz and live in their own shops in the country.

When talking with Liu Hanlin, Aoyama is observing, feeling and recording attentively, which is actually expressing his attitude.

Photographers return to their hometown and pay tribute to their hometown and nature with their series of works.

Castle Peak calls this journey the story of returning home: If you have a peaceful mind, you can live a lifetime by guarding a few trees, and they can be your forever bosom friends.

Wei Bi is a friend of photographer Zeng Han. Qingshan learned about Wei Bi's series of Meng Xi and the changes of his life track from Zeng Han's mouth.

Once she knew that there was a photo exhibition at the Millennium Monument and Wei Bi's new works, so she went. In the exhibition hall, Qingshan felt that what he was looking for might be a clear and sincere self-expression. On the wall in the corner of the exhibition hall, I saw Wei Bi's works. Most of the contents are rural traditional or ancient appliances, abandoned daily necessities, and plants and crops in the field. The shooting method is simple, things are different, and the photos are inscribed with a brush. The writing is unpretentious, but simple and true.

After reading this series of works, Meng Qian II. Qingshan decided to go to Hunan to find him.

Mengqian Town is Wei Bi's lingering hometown. I contacted Wei Bi and made an appointment to wait at Jingzhou Station. He drove to pick him up. The two people in the car began to talk. Wei Bi talked about his life and work in Mengqian Town, and talked about some memories of reading when he was a teenager. He often has a sarcastic and self-deprecating sense of humor in chatting.

When I got home, Webby's wife Nana and her children were waiting for me with the light on. On the way, my mother and my wife called in turn and asked him where he was and whether he would be home soon. This is a man wrapped in close family ties.

He asked Nana to go to the kitchen to cook noodles for everyone and began to introduce the house. Talk about the structure of the house, talk about everything in the house, including memories. Qingshan said, while carefully observing and recording. When eating noodles, he said household words, which made Qingshan feel natural and simple.

The life in Mengqian Town is natural and real. They walk around the house every day, chatting, talking about the trees in the garden, and talking about their feelings about life and art. Webby elaborated on his experiences and expressed his feelings. Wei Bi still gives lectures, while Qingshan listens and occasionally asks questions.

Young monks practice poetry and Thangka to realize and worship their own beliefs.

Castle Peak calls this journey across the sea of samsara a dream: I live in the consciousness of Buddha and walk in my own dream. I want to use these Bayeux Sutra to make a boat and leave the sea of reincarnation.

Sangji Gyatso, 24, is a Tibetan monk studying in Labrang Temple. Jing San happened to see his Weibo. He recorded and expressed his life in the temple. Qingshan learned about the life of Labrang Temple and the monks in it through his pictures and words. And moved by the thinking, feeling, beauty and vitality that these words exude.

So Weibo, who was concerned about him, received his private letter one morning and happened to see it. Then I made an appointment to meet. Eat, chat and drink tea, so as to become friends and get to know each other.

In July, I went to Beijing, and in August, I went to Rinpoche, Arigon, and went up the mountain together. During his trip, there were many conversations involving many topics and opinions. In September, I decided to go to Labrang Temple to find him.

Goodbye is also the first time, because he said that meeting again is the first acquaintance and a new beginning.

When we met again, he was still wearing a red dress. Qingshan followed him and began to visit Labrang Temple, listening to him talk about the history of the temple, the Tibetans who changed their scriptures, and his study and debate. His small study is full of everything that is meaningful to him. Talk about artists, movies and music, and express your feelings. Talking about the freedom and discipline of monks. Any commandment is don't hurt yourself and your family now and in the future.

When talking about Thangka, he said that Thangka with Zen or ideological guidance is very powerful, like a truth, and does not need much explanation.

Regarding practice, he said that mentality is the most important thing. Man's practice should abide by the precepts at first, but in the end he should go beyond them. He said that as a monk, the purpose of his study is to gain enlightenment and ultimate freedom.

The old piano player who played in the ancient method, over eighty years old, devoted himself to one thing.

Castle Peak called this trip Su Qin. Gu Yin. Light taste: Ran Ran in the years, and whether a person's heart can be stable and calm depends on what kind of heart he has.

Guqin is a traditional musical instrument in ancient China. Its sound strength and depth are balanced, and it has a deep aftertaste. Father is not only a performance, but also a way to please others with timbre. More profoundly, it means that this ceremony should be in harmony with the player's own heart.

Teacher Ye is eighty-four years old, so it is inconvenient to entertain guests. After contacting two local friends, Zhou Chen and Han Tong, it took nearly half a year to finally make an appointment to meet.

Teacher Ye plays the piano almost every day. In addition to dealing with simple housework, she also teaches the piano and gives lessons once a week. She preached that pianos vary from person to person and should be based on their own conditions. Generally, I can concentrate, have time and economic conditions, and learn quickly. I like guqin. I know it very well. I can appreciate it and learn it quickly.

She thinks it is necessary to publicize, promote and popularize Guqin as much as possible, so that more people can know it. Cultural heritage should be carried forward and passed on.

Teacher Ye learned the piano because of his father's preference. At first, I studied with Yang Ziyong, a teacher who lives in Yangzhou. I studied for ten months. Later, Teacher Yang returned to Yangzhou and joined the society at that time under the introduction of his father and friends. By participating in the club's elegant collection (once every half month or once a month), I further improved my piano skills, during which I visited three teachers, Zhang Ziqian and Xu.

Teacher Ye began to learn the piano at the age of fourteen and never stopped. I studied piano and painting, and I studied with Zhang Daqian for a year. Then follow him to Chengdu.

Teacher Ye said that playing a piano piece should show its connotation. When you really reach a certain level, and you think that's it, you should do what you want.

Teacher Ye usually talks about things, and his expression is simple and direct, without any unnecessary conclusions and expressions. It gives people the impression that he is a person who has left himself behind, and he can hardly hear some of his opinions, because he will slip away unconsciously. Only when it comes to guqin will she have a theory of self.

These four journeys are all natural causes of Qingshan. Part of the time she spent with them was distilled into words. And the continuation continues.

In this long journey, Qingshan explored the source of his heart and found himself. She writes about them and expresses their expression, which is actually what she wants to express her attitude.

The four people she met lived the life we imagined, which seemed unreal. But who knows, somewhere in the world, all this is really happening, waiting for us to discover, pursue and explore.