Traditional Culture Encyclopedia - Photography and portraiture - The story of loving life
The story of loving life
[Edit this paragraph] Dialogue between Lu Yu and Zhang Haidi, the host of Phoenix TV.
-The True and Beautiful Zhang Haidi (Excerpt) More than 20 years have passed, and Zhang Haidi, who will turn 47 this year, seems to have gradually disappeared from people's minds. After experiencing cancer, the controversy of love and marriage, and the challenge of death, ... I still faced Lu Yu frankly. What would she say? ...
Zhang Haidi: When people first knew my name, I was only 26 years old. I will be 47 years old this year. More than 20 years have passed, and time flies. But at that time, sometimes it was like dreaming, and it felt like something had happened to someone else.
Lu Yu: Do you remember your most mythical time? What is your daily life like?
Zhang Haidi: Life is restless every day. The letters I received at that time were all packed in sacks and sent to my work and home one by one. At that time, there was nothing I could do. Moreover, in my family, there are also groups of people, ranging from hundreds to dozens or even a few people. We must see Heidi every day. Can I see her?
Lu Yu: But from an outsider's point of view, for example, from my point of view, one day, Zhang Haidi seemed to disappear from my sight, and then I seldom heard from her. It feels like slowly, you don't know if you will take the initiative to fade out of our sight, and you don't know if the outside world is slowly moving away from you. Is it a two-way choice or a purely personal choice?
Zhang Haidi: Probably, I think it's a two-way street, because first of all, I think it's personal. Personally, I think we should keep a clear head, especially when choosing this career. As a writer, I should work behind the scenes, not at the front desk. Because I'm not an actor, I don't intend to act, and I don't need to go on stage, because my work should be invisible to everyone. This is my own choice. When others can't see me, it may be the moment when I trudge in the long river of my career. Then in this propaganda media, their propaganda of a character should be relatively long for me. Up to now, there are often pages written about Heidi or something. But things will be better when we get to 1986.
(Explanation) 199 1 year, Zhang Haidi was diagnosed by a doctor and learned that he had melanoma on his nose. So, she experienced the sixth major operation in her life.
Lu Yu: Does the operation hurt?
Zhang Haidi: Very painful. It should be said that it took time from peeling to suture, because the best doctor in Shanghai gave me the best treatment in such a small place, and more than 40 stitches were stitched in such a small place. Tiny needles, though thin, seem to me to be pulling hemp rope. But as a woman, I feel that I have suffered the kind of pain that men can't bear. This kind of pain is not only physical, but also mental. After the operation, my hands were cold and a little shaky, but I didn't scream. My wife was waiting for me outside when I came out. When I touched his hand, it was colder than mine. Later, I told him that I had a feeling that if I was caught by the enemy during the white terror, I wouldn't say anything. I said, will you? He said I would not say anything. I said no, you will. I couldn't laugh at that time because my face was too painful, but I knew I could bear the most unbearable pain in the world.
Lu Yu: Didn't you shed a tear?
Zhang Haidi: No, I never shed tears because I was sick when I was growing up. I am very emotional, but I have never shed tears because of illness. Always because of parting, leaving relatives and friends, and then something, tears, that's all. Can everyone wait a minute? I'm looking at the toilet on my watch.
Lu Yu: I found that Heidi is a little more than ordinary people, that is, she is sensitive to time. As she is completely unconscious from the chest down, she must observe the time very strictly. Every two hours, she has to use the bathroom, and she doesn't need to be reminded or set an alarm clock every time. It seems that she already has a natural biological clock in her body, and she will be reminded then. Heidi told me that it took her 40 years to get into the habit.
(Explanation) After the operation, Zhang Haidi's physical condition was extremely poor, but she still insisted on studying in the Philosophy Department of Jilin University and pursuing postgraduate courses. Two years later, he got his degree and became the first master of philosophy in China to sit in a wheelchair.
Lu Yu: 42 years has been accompanied by illness. I don't know what kind of feeling and state it is
Zhang Haidi: Sometimes I think of myself, and occasionally I feel moved by myself when my eyes are full of tears. Why? Sometimes, I think so, alas, especially when talking to my mother. Sometimes I just say, Mom, if I had been sick, I could have persisted for ten or twenty years, and I could have persisted for thirty years. Really, if I can persist for 40 years, I think it is really, really difficult, because I have to overcome many things that others can't see at all. Then you have to overcome many puzzles and obstacles that others simply can't imagine.
Lu Yu: But why don't you give up?
Zhang Haidi: I didn't give up. I want to give up every day, but I pick it up every day. I think I carefully put the flame of life, which is about to go out. As I told them the other day, I said I want to give up every day and pick it up like a small flame. I blew this little fire and turned it into a bonfire in my heart. Blow harder and harder, let it continue to burn.
Lu Yu: For a long time, Zhang Haidi was regarded as a hero, but in our minds, heroes are always different from ordinary people. They don't eat earthly fireworks and have no worldly desires. But Zhang Haidi, like every ordinary woman, was full of fantasy and pursuit of love from an early age. Of course, she has tasted the joy of love and suffered the blow of lovelorn. But she said that even if the wings are broken, the heart will fly.
(Explanation) 1970, Zhang Haidi followed his parents to the countryside of Shenxian County, Liaocheng City, Shandong Province. There, girlhood Zhang Haidi had her first love.
Zhang Haidi: One day, I fell in love with a boy. The boy liked me very, very much, in our small county. But after all these years, I probably didn't expect this. One day, he suddenly brought a girl to my house, and I still remember that girl. It was a winter, and she was wearing a dress that was rare at that time, because she came from other places, wearing a rare wool coat and Mao Mao collar. Just like that, I felt like the dress that tonya was wearing, because it was very cold there. He came in and said, Ah, Heidi, this is my cousin. We went to the movies together that day, and they pushed me to the movies, so he told me that this was his cousin. But at that time, I was very sensitive to seeing this girl. She is really beautiful and healthy. It was after this day that I felt that the boy I liked really alienated me. What did I feel at this time? I just think the place is really too small, and my disability is too heavy. In other words, when he makes realistic and imaginary love choices, he must be biased towards some aspects of secular society, which I can understand. I am willing to chew the pain myself. I believe I won't lose money this time next year. It really is. Experienced great pain. Later, everything was the same for me. Sometimes my friends will push me to go to the movies and go to the open-air cinema to see movies. My friend went to the movies. I really want to see him. I really want to see him again. But not necessarily face to face. Face to face is impossible. He dare not look into my eyes, and I don't want to look into his eyes. I want to have a quiet look from a distance. Later, my friend gave me a push, that is, when I walked through an alley, he was at the other end of the alley. When I looked at it, he was walking with that girl. His cousin, my heart is really like, you know, what is acupuncture?
Lu Yu: I know that feeling.
Zhang Haidi: I really know the feeling of acupuncture. I think every woman should experience that kind of pain. Love is really, as Shakespeare said, love is to let people taste all the flavors in the world. If it is really sweet from the beginning, a woman is incomplete without this kind of pain. Lu Yu: What happened afterwards? Have you ever tasted anything other than the pain you feel? You should have tasted all the ups and downs, including the sweetness.
Zhang Haidi: There are sweetness and other things I have experienced. For example, when a male friend came to see me, he left me a message, which made me think for several years. He said, Heidi, he said that the next time I came back, you would feel really happy. In this sentence, we were all very obscure. A few years later, he was far away and an educated young man. He's at the Yellow River Army Racecourse, where I seldom tell anyone about it. A few years later, one day he sent me a letter with a photo in it. After seeing this photo, I tore it up.
Lu Yu: Why?
Zhang Haidi: Because (in the photo) he is standing on a step with a woman, on the step of a building. He stands tall and the woman stands low. What did he write later? That is to say, Heidi, I am married. What does my lover do? He said such things very, very bluntly and sent me such photos. I think he might expect my blessing. To me, he was like a bullet. All of a sudden, let alone a bullet, he stabbed me like a sword. It was that kind of pain that even made my whole body twitch violently, which made me suddenly return to reality from that dream, and I felt that the reality was very cold, and it was so cold for a moment. I pursue again and again, and I lose again and again.
Zhang Haidi's husband is Wang Zuoliang, who teaches foreign languages at Shandong Normal University. The combination of the two is in 1982. They didn't have a wedding, and now everything is spent in peace, just like now.
Lu Yu: I remember in the early 1990s, there was an argument in the newspaper about whether Zhang Haidi should get married or not. Zhang Haidi himself laughed off these arguments. She said that as early as 1982, before she became a household name, she had been married for nearly 20 years. To outsiders, if it weren't for the wheelchair, the couple would not be much different from millions of ordinary couples in China.
Lu Yu: Before I met Zhang Haidi, I was a little worried. I'm afraid she won't talk about her emotional experience and family life, but Heidi is very honest. At the time of this interview, Heidi's husband and sister were at home, and Heidi didn't avoid us at all. From time to time, she instructed her husband to help her cushion or pour a cup of coffee. I can feel that Heidi is the center of this family, not because of her illness.
Mr. and Mrs. Zhang Haidi have no children. 10 years ago, they adopted this puppy and named it "Bench". The couple like it very much, and people think it is their child.
Lu Yu: I have heard two voices about Zhang Haidi. Some people say that it is really unfair for a smart and talented woman like her to suffer so much physically. But some people say that Zhang Haidi has everything, fame and status, and has published so many books. What else can he ask for? But Heidi told me that she was willing to give up all this and only wanted to have a healthy and normal body. I think this is difficult for ordinary people to understand. Heidi talked about death together. I asked her what she would write if she wrote her own epitaph. Heidi said she would write like this. Here lies an unyielding Heidi, a beautiful Heidi.
[Edit this paragraph] Awards
1992 Solemn Literature Award of Chinese Writers Association;
1On March 7th, 993, the Central Committee of the Communist Youth League held a naming commendation meeting to award Zhang Haidi the honorary title of "Excellent Communist Youth League Member" and made a decision to learn from her.
1994 first prize of the first national prize for striving for civilized progress;
1997 national "five one projects" book award;
1998 won the title of "Excellent Project Award" and "Top Ten Literary and Art Workers in Shandong Province" in Shandong Province;
1998 book award and individual special award of the second national civilization progress award;
1999 the third national outstanding women's reading award;
1999 the 4th National Excellent Book Award for Foreign Literary Works;
On June 5438+ 10, 2002, Publicity Department of the Communist Party of China and the General Administration of Press and Publication listed The Top as the key reading of the 16th National Congress of the Communist Party of China.
From June, 5438 to February, 2002, The Top won the Third National Book Award for Striving for Civilization and Progress.
From June 5438 to October 2003 10, Extreme won the first book award of China Publishing Group.
June, 5438+February, 2003, Extreme won the 8th China Youth Excellent Reading Award;
From June 5438 to February 2003, Top won the second China Prize for Women's Literature;
From June 5th, 2003 to February, 2003, Extreme won the "Five Ones" project book award issued by the Communist Party of China (CPC) Propaganda Department.
Zhang Haidi, born in Jinan in autumn of 1955. At the age of five, he suffered from myelopathy and was completely paralyzed from the chest down. From then on, Zhang Haidi began her unique life. Unable to go to school, she taught herself middle school courses at home. /kloc-When she was 0/5 years old, Heidi followed her parents and sent her to the countryside of Liaocheng (Shandong) to be a teacher for her children. She also taught herself acupuncture techniques and treated villagers for free. Later, Zhang Haidi taught himself many foreign languages and worked as a radio repairman.
Facing the cruel challenge of fate, Zhang Haidi didn't feel depressed and sink. She fought against the disease with tenacious perseverance and perseverance, withstood severe tests and was full of confidence in life. Although she didn't have a chance to enter the school, she studied hard, finished all the courses in primary and secondary schools, taught herself college English, Japanese, German and Esperanto, and studied the courses of universities and graduate students. From 65438 to 0983, Zhang Haidi began to engage in literary creation, translated hundreds of thousands of English novels, such as The Beach Clinic, and compiled books, such as Windows Open to the Sky and Questioning Life and Dreams in Wheelchairs. Among them, Dream in a Wheelchair was published in Japan and South Korea, and Pursuing Life was published less than half a year and reprinted three times, winning the national "Five One Projects" book award. Before The Pursuit of Life, this prize has never been awarded to prose works. Recently, a 300,000-word novel, Extremely Top, will be published soon. Since 1983, Zhang Haidi has created and translated more than 1 10,000 words.
In order to make greater contributions to society, she taught herself more than a dozen medical monographs, consulted experienced doctors, learned acupuncture and other medical skills, and treated the masses for free 10000 person-times.
1983 China youth daily published "be a meteor and leave the light to the world". Zhang Haidi became famous in China and won two reputations, one is "New Lei Feng in 1980s" and the other is "Contemporary Paul".
Zhang Haidi holds the belief that "to live is to be a person who is beneficial to society" and takes Paul as an example to bravely dedicate his light and heat to the people. With her words and deeds, she answered the questions of outlook on life and values that hundreds of millions of young people are very concerned about. Deng Xiaoping wrote an inscription: "Learn from Zhang Haidi and be a new capitalist with ideals, morality, culture and discipline!"
Subsequently, Zhang Haidi became a moral force.
Zhang Haidi is now a member of the Chinese People's Political Consultative Conference (CPPCC) and works in Shandong Writers Association, engaged in creation and translation.
(2) To live is to be a person who is beneficial to society.
Zhang Haidi said: "I am like a meteor, and I want to leave the light to the world." With this ideal, she studied and worked with extraordinary perseverance and sang a hymn of life.
"To live is to do things for the people." Zhang Haidi said so and did the same. 1970, when she was 15 years old, she followed her parents to live in the countryside. In the countryside, she thinks of others and works for people everywhere. She found that there was no music teacher in primary school, so she took the initiative to teach singing at school. After class, I also help students organize self-study groups, give them haircuts, button buttons and get dressed. She found that there was a shortage of doctors and medicines in the village, so she decided to study medical knowledge and technology, and used her pocket money to buy medical books, thermometers, stethoscopes and commonly used medicines. She has finished reading medical books such as Acupuncture, Human Anatomy, Internal Medicine and Practical Pediatrics. When learning acupuncture, in order to experience the sense of acupuncture, she practiced acupuncture repeatedly on herself. In just a few years, she actually became a young local "famous doctor". As long as anyone asks for a doctor, she always receives him warmly. When the seriously ill patient can't move, she sits in a wheelchair and walks to the door to give the patient an injection and take medicine. There was an old man named Geng, who was unable to speak for six years because of the sequelae of cerebral thrombosis and was paralyzed for three years. He was never cured. Zhang Haidi encouraged Uncle Geng to enhance his confidence in overcoming the disease mentally, while reading a lot of books and carefully treating Uncle Geng. Later, Uncle Geng was finally able to talk and walk. At this time, Zhang Haidi deeply realized the happiness of serving the people.
Comrade Zhang Haidi regards doing things for the society and the people as his greatest happiness. Her lofty spirit shines with the light of productism.
Some people say that life is the happiest if you eat well, dress well and play well. In my opinion, the happiest thing in this world is to work hard, make a determined effort, create wealth with your own hands and contribute everything to the cause of human liberation-* * * capitalism.
[Edit this paragraph] Honorary title
Zhang Haidi was awarded various honorary titles:
198 1 year was awarded as an advanced worker of Shenxian Radio and Television Bureau;
1982 was awarded the title of "model communist youth league member" in Liaocheng area;
1982 was awarded the title of "March 8th Red Flag Bearer" in Liaocheng area;
1983 * * Shandong Provincial Committee of the Communist Youth League awarded the title of "Model League Member";
1983 Shandong provincial government awarded the title of "model worker";
On March 7th 1983, the Central Committee of the Communist Youth League awarded the title of "Excellent League Member";
1983 Shandong Women's Federation awarded the title of "March 8th Red Flag Bearer";
1983 All-China Women's Federation awarded the title of "March 8th Red Flag Bearer";
1989 was awarded the title of "Excellent Young Ideological Worker" by the Propaganda Department of the CPC;
1990 Shandong Communist Youth League Committee awarded the title of "Top Ten Outstanding Youth";
199 1 China Disabled Persons' Federation awarded the title of "Self-improvement Model";
1992 Jinan municipal government has made great contributions;
1993, the All-China Women's Federation awarded the title of "Women's Model Worker" and again awarded the title of "March 8th Red Flag Bearer";
1995 Shandong provincial party Committee propaganda department awarded the title of "model party member literary and art worker";
1997 Shandong provincial party Committee propaganda department awarded the title of "top ten literary and art workers";
1997 was rated as "the world's five outstanding disabled people" by NHK in Japan;
In 2000, he was awarded the title of "National Model Worker" by the State Council.
In 200 1 year, she was named "the 20 most influential women of the century in the world" by Global magazine of Xinhua News Agency.
[Edit this paragraph] Please learn from her.
Zhang Haidi was elected as a member of the 11th Central Committee of the Communist Youth League, and served as a director of China Disabled Persons Welfare Foundation, a member of the presidium of China Disabled Persons' Federation, a vice-chairman of Shandong Disabled Persons' Federation and a vice-chairman of Shandong Youth Federation for a long time. Haidi constantly strives for self-improvement in her post and social work, and serves the society with full enthusiasm and noble character and contributes to the people. He has a high reputation and prestige among the broad masses of the people and is a good example that can stand the test of time. She is the pride of a generation of young people in China and an outstanding representative of the disabled in China.
Facing the cruel challenge of fate, Zhang Haidi didn't feel depressed and sink. She fought against the disease with tenacious perseverance and perseverance, withstood severe tests and was full of confidence in life. Although she didn't have a chance to enter the school, she studied hard, completed all the courses in primary and secondary schools, taught herself college English, Japanese, German and Esperanto, and studied the courses of universities and graduate students.
In order to make greater contributions to society, she taught herself more than a dozen medical monographs, consulted experienced doctors, learned acupuncture and other medical skills, and treated the masses for free 10000 person-times.
1983 China youth daily published "be a meteor and leave the light to the world". Zhang Haidi became famous in China and won two reputations, one is "New Lei Feng in 1980s" and the other is "Contemporary Paul".
Zhang Haidi holds the belief that "to live is to be a person who is beneficial to society" and takes Paul as an example to bravely dedicate his light and heat to the people. With her words and deeds, she answered the questions of outlook on life and values that hundreds of millions of young people are very concerned about. Deng Xiaoping wrote an inscription: "Learn from Zhang Haidi and be a new capitalist with ideals, morality, culture and discipline!"
Subsequently, Zhang Haidi became a moral force.
199 1 year, after receiving cancer surgery, Zhang Haidi continued to fight against her fate with unyielding spirit, and she began to pursue a postgraduate course in philosophy. Through unremitting efforts, she wrote the paper "Disabled People in the Vision of Cultural Philosophy". 1993 passed the postgraduate course examination of philosophy department of Jilin University and passed the thesis defense, and was awarded the master's degree. Zhang Haidi proved the power of life with her own courage, just as she herself said, "Like all determined people, I regard trying to explore myself as real happiness." With the spirit of overcoming her own obstacles, she opened a road for the disabled to enter the sea of knowledge.
Zhang Haidi has also done a lot of social work for many years. She inspired countless teenagers to make progress with her speeches and songs. She often goes to welfare homes, special education schools and families of disabled people to visit the elderly and disabled children, and send them gifts and warmth. In recent years, she has built a primary school for rural areas, helped poor disabled children to treat diseases and study, and donated more than 60,000 yuan to the disaster-stricken areas and children. She also actively participated in various work and activities of the cause of the disabled, called on the whole society to support the cause of the disabled, cared for and helped the disabled, encouraged them to stand on their own feet, and made outstanding contributions to the work and activities and development of the cause of the disabled.
Zhang Haidi has been invited to visit Japan and South Korea for three times to hold lectures and concerts. Her unremitting struggle for self-improvement has also inspired people of different nationalities. From 65438 to 0995, she participated in the Fourth World Conference on Women as a member of the China government delegation. 1997 was rated as one of the five outstanding disabled people in the world by NHK TV in Japan.
1983 In May, the CPC Central Committee issued a decision to learn from Comrade Zhang Haidi. Eight proletarian revolutionaries of the older generation, including Deng Xiaoping, Ye Jianying and Li Xiannian, successively wrote inscriptions for Zhang Haidi in recognition of her enterprising spirit and selfless dedication.
Haidi constantly strives for self-improvement in her post and social work, and serves the society with full enthusiasm and noble character and contributes to the people. He has a high reputation and prestige among the broad masses of the people and is a good example that can stand the test of time. She is the pride of a generation of young people in China and an outstanding representative of the disabled in China.
[Edit this paragraph] About happiness
Happiness is hard. We often spend our years in sorrow for short-term happiness, especially in Zhang Haidi. Zhang Haidi looks very happy, even in the most painful time, she can also make a bright smile. But Zhang Haidi said that she never did anything that really made her happy.
Zhang Haidi is a writer now, but writing is painful. She has a large area of bedsore and exposed bones, but she is still writing. She had several operations, which were very painful. Her nose cancer operation was not anesthetized. She clearly felt the knife cut her nose and the needle went through her skin. The first time she heard that she had cancer, she even felt happy-she was finally free. Zhang Haidi said: My greatest happiness is death. However, she survived.
She writes novels, paints oil paintings, dances ballet, shoots TV, sings, studies for a master's degree ... even, she likes perfume very much and has a full life. Zhu Jun, the host, asked her if it was hard for you to sit like this. She said, yes, it is very hard, but I have been sitting like this for 40 years. As a member of CPPCC, her suggestion is to promote barrier-free facilities in colleges and universities. "I am in pain, but I can make others happy." When Zhang Haidi said this, poetry spread from her side.
"Twenty years have passed. Looking back now, I am always calm in the face of the media. When you suddenly face so many flashes, laughter and applause, it is most important to adjust yourself. What should I do or what should I do? My heart will always be like a clear water, so blue and so deep. "
"There is a fragile Heidi. You can't imagine the trouble that a disabled woman like me can't do anything when she is dirty. Sometimes I even feel better without me. Sometimes I live in a tall building on business, so I just go and have a look. I often think that if I really fall down like this, everything will be over and I will never have to suffer again. I even want to be euthanized. "
"In retrospect, I am indeed a very tenacious Heidi. Disability is a great pain for human beings, but it always needs someone to chew. I thank life for giving me a talking pen, so that I can talk and fight. I am not only alive, but also liberated my mind in writing. "
"Today, sitting at this window, looking at this endless grassland, I hope I can feel the warmth and kindness of the earth step by step with my feet like you, and find the feeling of walking I once had ..."
At the age of five, Zhang Haidi suffered from spinal hemangioma, which led to paraplegia. However, she is disabled, determined and hardworking, and is known as "contemporary Paul".
Facing the cruel challenge of fate, Zhang Haidi didn't feel depressed and sink. She fought against the disease with tenacious perseverance and perseverance, withstood severe tests and was full of confidence in life. Although she didn't have a chance to enter the school, she studied hard, completed all the courses in primary and secondary schools, taught herself college English, Japanese, German and Esperanto, and studied the courses of universities and graduate students. 1983 On March 7th, the Bureau of the Central Committee of the Communist Youth League held a naming commendation meeting in Beijing, and awarded the title of "Excellent League Member" to Comrade Zhang Haidi, who was known as "the new Lei Feng of the 1980s". From 65438 to 0983, Zhang Haidi began to engage in literary creation, and successively translated The Seaside Clinic, Little Miller's Travels and Rebecca's New School, and created works of more than one million words, such as Windows Open to the Sky and Life and Dreams in Wheelchairs. Now he is a first-class writer in the literary creation room of Shandong Writers Association. 1993 Zhang Haidi passed the examination and thesis defense, and obtained a master's degree in philosophy from Jilin University. 1994 participated in the Far South Games. 1997 was selected as "the five outstanding disabled people in the world" by NHK in Japan. 1998 so far, he is the chairman of China Disabled Persons' Association. Won the title of national model worker in 2000.
Twenty years have passed since we met Zhang Haidi. Few people under the age of 20 remember Zhang Haidi. Modern medicine has continued Zhang Haidi's life, but how bright is the life that has been continued by repeated operations? Twenty years ago, Zhang Haidi was still a warm-blooded young man when he grasped the fate by the throat. Twenty years later, is she still knocking on the door of fate? Let's take a look at Zhang Haidi's inner world.
[Edit this paragraph] About reputation
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