"Becoming Jane Austen"｜Love without life and death makes the flowers bloom more beautiful

Two years ago, my mother recommended the movie "Being Jane Austen" to me. The simple and rational view of love greatly touched and influenced me. The intense study and immature mind in high school made me I can't write an article about love like this.

Two years later, I met a beloved man and saw what good love should be like. Watching this film again, my feelings were completely different.

This article is about Jane Austen and about love.

"If our love can destroy your family, it will also destroy itself, disappearing in guilt, regret and self-blame. This is the contradictory fact."

"Becoming Jane Austen" is, in my opinion, a very plain love movie, but it has become a classic because of such a rational choice and a bittersweet ending. As for Jane Austen, even if she did not leave six immortal works for Britain, just because of this teenage love, in my opinion, she is still a great woman.

Loving someone is not great, but using your love to fulfill someone is great.

Many years later, she recognized him at a glance in the vast crowd and was intimidated. However, no matter how calm she looked, she could not suppress the joy and nervousness in her eyes.

Those old things were just a passing thing to her. She never blamed him, so there was no need to forgive anything.

She only knows that many years ago, she crushed her love abruptly, but she became the chief judge of the Supreme Court of Ireland.

During these years, she never married, and he named his eldest daughter "Jane".

——The years are scorching, but they do not let them forget their love.

"May all those who have gone through fire and water bear fruit."

Since I have not done in-depth research, I am not sure whether it is cultural differences. Our domestic film, television, books and literature The value orientation seems to tend to shape love into a "sacred and noble force" that breaks through money, power, and status. This value orientation allows people to praise "true love" while also giving people - Especially the younger generation brings the wrong idea of ??"as long as I can be with you, I don't care about anything."

I often hear people say, "Love in college is very fragile and cannot withstand the slightest test." However, many people also tell me, "Let's fall in love in college. The most beautiful years should not have any regrets."

Yes, love before entering society seems to have nothing to do with money, power, and status. It is just because you really like it, just because you are happy with each other, and just because you have a bond, so you make such a choice.

However, those happy times will eventually face the "true love killer" of "graduation season", and they gave it a hateful and jealous name: "Breakup Season".

Haruki Murakami said: "No one really likes to be alone, but they just don’t like to be disappointed. Once someone is with you, hope will accompany you. If you have hope, you will be disappointed. If you are destined to be disappointed, Why not never hope, why not always be alone?"

For a long time, this passage was my belief. Later, I discarded this passage like a useless chess piece.

——Have you never been disappointed when you have been alone for so long?

What a word that awakens the dreamer.

The person who said this is my husband.

I suddenly remembered the reflection and discussion I had with my mother after I was slightly frustrated in the college entrance examination. Her words were particularly profound in my memory. She said: "The people around you are not good enough. You have been fighting alone for three years." . ”

I suddenly understood that hope and disappointment are just the various aspects of life in the mountains and rivers. Do not refuse anyone to come, and do not expect anyone to stay. This is the best state.

Tom Lefroy said to Jane: "If we are not together, what is the meaning of life?"

The reason why he said this must be because he and During the time Jane was together, they both brought extraordinary meaning to each other's lives.

From an intuitive point of view, Tom's broad vision has brought Jane's literary attainments to a higher level. Jane's existence has also restrained Tom's playboy character. Even her departure has a profound impact on him. Huge significance.

As Jian said: "This combination is beneficial to both parties: the woman is calm and lively, which can make the man soft-hearted and elegant; the man is shrewd and knowledgeable, and has deep experience, which will definitely make the woman It has been of great benefit. It is a pity that this happy marriage is no longer possible. Thousands of lovers in the world who want to form a truly happy marriage have missed an example of the right person."

They may not necessarily get married in the end, but they will definitely make each other grow.

Not everyone can accompany the person they love for life, but during the time of companionship, they should always leave some precious memories for the other person, so that it is not a regret.

People who love each other should stay together all day long, only talking about love and flirting, because "your mother and I fell into the water at the same time, why didn't you save me first?" Having a big fight without thinking, coveting "other people's boyfriend xxxxxx" and complaining about your own boyfriend, looking for someone to play the role of a third party to test the boyfriend's loyalty, I think, can such a boring person who wants to die, please stop? Out to harm people!

A good love should be music, chess, calligraphy, painting, poetry and wine.

Between the two of them, she liked writing, so he would accompany her to read a lot of books; he liked traveling, so she would accompany him to travel around the world; because he loved eating desserts, she went to study there, and from then on she had a " "Pastry Chef"; because she loved taking photos, he taught himself photography and became an "amateur photographer".

When you love someone, do you want to improve yourself? Is there any conflict between the two? No.

Years later, even if you have become strangers, when you look back, you will not just be able to sigh with emotion: "You have seen and touched every inch of my skin, but you can only see me in my wedding dress." ", but I can still think, "Because of you, I am who I am today."

So, what kind of love can lead to marriage?

I thought of Xue Xiaochan's words: "Have the ability to give, have the confidence to receive."

The love tragedy between Tom Lefroy and Jane also originated from due to his lack of financial independence and her lack of inheritance rights to property. Don't think that linking love with money is a derogation of love. A good love that ends up getting married never ignores the economy, or in other words, the economy itself is a part of love.

Of course, the economy I am talking about is just one of the intuitive symbols of "ability", and it is not a one-size-fits-all statement like "Only with money can you have true love." It's just that others have to use some specific objects to measure your ability and confidence.

"Because of you, I am willing to be a better person and don't want to be a burden to you, so I work hard just to prove that I am worthy of you."

Because I love you, and I don't want to go through fire and water with you in exchange for the hard-won flowers and fruits; I only want to keep you carefree for a hundred years, with a thousand years in your eyes.

Just because you and I are both flower lovers.