To be honest, I don’t want to travel right now

Saturday, August 4, 2018 Sunny

In the past, I loved traveling. But the number of times I actually go out is extremely rare. The reasons are nothing more than work, children and other trivial matters as well as financial reasons.

So I often have a yearning for traveling in my heart, and I also envy others who can travel all over the world. So I often think, when the situation gets better, I must go out and have fun.

But later, when my children grew up, my work became free, and my finances were no longer so tight, I still rarely traveled due to various reasons. So far, I am almost halfway through my life, and I still don’t travel much.

In the past few years, I would go out with you once every summer vacation. Although it was not far away and the time was not long, for me, I finally started my journey of traveling.

Later, various self-driving tours and group tours gradually became popular. People's concepts have changed, their wallets are full, and leisure travel embellishes modern people's lives in various forms.

For some office workers, going out with friends on weekends is also a way to relax and save time and worry.

I also went on several short-term tours, and I really felt like I was out of a cage. The comfort of integrating my body and mind into nature cannot be described with my poor pen. But I feel very tired every time I come back. Because of my health, the long bus ride is a pain for me.

Last summer, I finally had a long-distance trip and went to Jiuzhaigou with a group. Unexpectedly, I caught a cold the night I arrived. The altitude sickness in the Zoige Grassland made me dizzy all the way, but in front of the beautiful scenery, I had no thoughts and energy.

On the return flight, as my body slowly recovered, I was filled with regrets and sighs. I really hated myself for not living up to expectations. Why was I so unlucky?

After that time, I said I would never travel again! It’s a waste of money, which makes the body suffer, and the people around you are also disappointed.

Last winter, after I started to study writing seriously, I realized that there was a big gap between myself and others, so I immersed myself in reading and writing without thinking about anything else. Travel has become a distant dream and has been put on hold.

It is said that "to read thousands of books, it is even more necessary to travel thousands of miles", but others say, "If you have not read many books, no matter how many times you go out, you are still like a postman."

I think my first priority right now is to read more and improve my knowledge level. Only then will I truly appreciate the beauty of traveling when I go traveling again.

But the family said that at this age, if you don’t take the time to go out and have a look, do you have to wait until you are old and can’t walk before going out?

This seems to be true, but it still does not arouse my desire to travel. Because at the beginning of last winter, I found that my stomach was uncomfortable. I searched for the cause for a long time and went to the hospital many times for examination and medication. But I always feel that my efforts are in vain, so I have no intention of mentioning travel.

Until the third day of the Lunar New Year, by chance, my father and I forced me and my son to embark on a journey to Beijing. To be honest, although it feels like being forced, it is quite beautiful in my heart. After all, we also like to travel in our hearts.

My son took care of the itinerary and all arrangements for food and accommodation during those days. While I enjoyed the feeling of being taken care of, I always felt a sense of disappointment that I was not keeping up with the times.

My son said that this is because he often doesn’t go out to play. He criticized me as a mother who doesn’t know how to organize her own life and lives a low-quality life.

Who doesn’t want to go out and play? Isn’t this limited by many factors? My son told me that these were all excuses and a lazy mentality that did not want to change.

I said sadly, son, mom, please change slowly. You are getting older, so don’t be too demanding, okay?

From that day on, I told myself that I had to change for the sake of my son!

Thank you, all the literary friends. In your words, in your encouragement and suggestions, and in the process of enriching my spare time through reading and writing, I feel that my heart is gradually becoming brighter. As I grew up, my understanding of life and the people around me also changed a lot.

The inner abundance makes life much brighter, and every day is full of hope and strength.

I thought about traveling again, but I have encountered too many things since the year and have been in a bad state, so I once again lost the thought of traveling.

First, the two of us were in poor health. My husband was hospitalized for a period of time and is still recovering. My stomach, heart, and thyroid were all experiencing varying degrees of discomfort. I was constantly exhausted from seeking medical advice and self-adjustment.

Later, there was another car accident. My husband hit a middle-aged woman with his car, causing her to undergo surgery for femoral head necrosis.

It was really raining all night when the house was leaking. It was extremely unlucky at that time and it was quite a struggle.

After a series of events, we were in financial straits. We had to repay the mortgage and car loan, the insurance for three of us had to be renewed, and the tuition for our son’s software major also required a large sum of money.

So, when my colleagues asked me if I had any travel plans at the beginning of the summer vacation, I answered clearly: At the moment, I don’t want to travel!

Can I go? Do I want to go? Everyone knows that in addition to daily necessities, life should also include poetry and distant places. I also want to be cool, but do I have the ability now?

Fortunately, practicing yoga and reading and writing have nurtured me, allowing me to quickly adjust my state of mind to peace and tranquility. The call of my dreams also leaves me no time to feel sorry for myself. Therefore, I do not plan to travel this time. I feel like I can spend the holidays peacefully.

This is indeed the case. I have been on vacation for more than 20 days, and my days have been busy, regular and fulfilling. I feel that it is far better than running around tiredly.

In the first half of the summer vacation that has passed, I spent every day like this: I got up at 5:30 in the morning, went out for a half-hour run, then came back and listened to the class while making breakfast, and after the meal I simply packed up and went to buy groceries. , read and write and read Jianyou’s articles after coming back. For lunch, make your own home-cooked meal that is suitable for nourishing your stomach. After the meal, take a rest for half an hour, read a book for a while, and then go to the gym to practice yoga. After practicing yoga, I continue to listen to classes and books on the way home, recite when I get home, then read official articles, and then have dinner. After dinner, I go for a walk for half an hour. When I get home, I wash myself and then continue reading and writing. I basically go to bed before 11 o'clock every day, and the quality of sleep is good.

After persisting like this for more than 20 days, my physical condition gradually improved. My discomfort symptoms have basically disappeared, and my daily mental state is better than most of the time before.

In this way, I have completely given up the idea of ??traveling. Not only that, I feel more and more that the leisure park environment in front of my house is really good. It is suitable for walking and fitness, where you can daydream, observe the changes of flowers, plants and trees, appreciate the unique charm of pavilions, water pavilions, read and write, and more. With the endless flow of tourists, you can't see all kinds of warmth and warmth in the world...

Suddenly I remembered a passage from Zhang Ailing: We go from home to the office, to school, to the small market, and walk every day. If you walk ten or twenty years, there are thousands of miles; if every time you walk through that street, it will be as if you are recognizing the road for the first time, and everything you look at will feel new and strange, and you will not "turn a blind eye." "Well, that's just like "traveling thousands of miles". Why do we have to cross the ocean? ("The Road Is the Eye")

So I wonder, have I also understood the true meaning of this passage? Haha, that’s a bit of a boast!

Such regular days have formed a habit, and it feels so good! In order to consolidate the results of adjustments made some time ago, I decided to continue to persevere.

But yesterday afternoon, my husband told me that he had signed up for us to travel to Qinghai.

Ordinarily this is a good thing. For some other women, it should be something worth being happy and happy about. But I was worried and in a bad mood.

The reason is that I don’t want to travel, I hate having my life disrupted, and I don’t like the feeling of being arranged, especially during this special period this year.

But my husband stubbornly believed that I should go out for fun. Isn’t it just over one thousand but less than two thousand yuan? Besides, if it’s not this opportunity, when can you take the initiative to travel?

That’s true, but I just don’t want to go! We were at loggerheads and were unhappy about such things, but the main cause seemed to be with me.

I am very unhappy. From last night to this morning, I don’t like him no matter what, and I can’t help but want to get angry.

It wasn’t until the end of the open yoga class at noon that my mood improved. Firstly, yoga diverted my attention and adjusted my emotions. Secondly, I often chose to give up on things that I couldn’t help and just let nature take its course. I also let things handle myself, which is really a bad character.

In the afternoon, his sister and my sister-in-law called and hoped that I could travel with them later.

I told about my unhappiness from last night to this morning, and received her kind ridicule and constant encouragement. She said, why are you so ignorant? If her husband arranges a trip, how excited will she be? It’s great to play, but if you don’t play it now, you will regret it later!

Putting down the phone, I suddenly laughed. Why did I do that? Just go out, who doesn't know how to play?

At this point, my words about not wanting to travel at the moment are invalid!

No discipline training camp? 158

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