Traditional Culture Encyclopedia - Travel guide - Changsha Lengchun's fragmentary prose

Changsha Lengchun's fragmentary prose

The quilt is too thin and it’s so cold.

I moved to live in an alley behind Zhongshan Road. The house was originally rented by my cousin, but because he was going to Fujian, he sublet it to me. It was on the third floor of an old house. The room was small and simple. I spent a whole day tidying it up.

Outside is a city that is within my reach but I have never known it. I don’t think it is strange. In fact, when I walk between cities, I don’t find anything different except that I gradually lose my way. . I think as long as you try to accept a new thing, you won't feel strange.

I gradually fell in love with this place, although it does not have the warmth of Zhuhai, no sea, and no new dreams. But when I feel homesick, I can spend more than 2 hours eating Chinese cabbage cooked by my mother. This is the warmest luxury I can imagine. This city is very close to home, I will stay here temporarily.

In the first few days after arriving, Changsha was unusually warm. I put on the cool two-piece sleeveless suit with great enthusiasm. Unexpectedly, it was the chilly spring season and it rained several times in succession. I hid in the humid room and did not dare to go out. I just nestled under the quilt and watched TV. No writing, no reading. The quilt and TV were left behind by my cousin. I washed the quilt very clean, and it smelled of soap, but it was too thin. Sometimes I woke up from the cold in the middle of the night, hugging the pillow and shivering in the dark, but gritted my teeth and refused. Let the tears fall. Later, I went to Carrefour and bought an electric blanket, and I felt like I could sleep more peacefully.

Don’t feel lonely. I feel lonely because I am concerned about something, or I feel out of place in a busy crowd. That is what I call loneliness. A lonely person sometimes feels calm and peaceful.

Old computers. Some books and CDs.

When I came out, I brought very few clothes and daily necessities, but I stubbornly brought a bag full of books and a few CDs of Faye Wong. These are my most cherished treasures that have accompanied me through all the hardships. When I was in Zhuhai, because of the instability of my job, I was willing to use my limited money to buy books without restraint, so I lived in poverty, but I never regretted it. But when I chose to leave later, I had a cupboard full of books that I couldn’t deal with, which made me feel pain for a long time. Finally, I selected a few favorites and reluctantly gave the others to my friends. Before I left, I solemnly warned them. She should take good care of it.

There is no CD player in the rented house. I didn’t buy one because I considered the life I had to plan. Faye Wong's CD has always been on the self-made desk, and I haven't listened to it for a long time. I like Faye Wong, uncontrollably, indescribably. Dou Wei said that her voice was round and jade-like, with cold jade and green smoke, which was the sound of nature. But I can't think of any appropriate words to express my love for her. All I can say is that when I listen to her songs, I find them a kind of comfort. I once discussed my love for her with an online friend I had never met late at night in the cold winter. He told me that when I like a song, the most important thing is to miss the story that happened in the background of the song. So on such a night, we found ***Ming, and I felt the warmth in my heart. We all love Faye Wong so deeply.

Go to the flea market with my cousin to look at computers. I am excited and happy to finally be able to use my own money to buy something I have always wanted. Because the requirements are not high, it turned out to be unexpectedly cheap. I was so happy that I forgot to negotiate the price. Thanks to my cousin’s reminder, I saved a week’s living expenses. We took a ride together to carry the computer home. It was very heavy, but we were in a happy mood. It turns out that doing something you like is so easy and happy.

Having a computer ended my life of blindly typing in Internet cafes. I can drink a glass of cold water quietly and listen to the crisp and lovely sound of the keyboard under my fingers. Feeling very satisfied.

My hair is longer than my sorrow.

In just two years, I found that my hair has spread to my waist. It may be because when people are sad, their hair grows like crazy. Grandma said that women with a lot of hair are stubborn and have a bad life. So when I was a child, I never kept my hair too long. I always cut it and cut it thinly, then tied it tightly into a ponytail. I also worked hard to train myself to be a smooth woman according to my grandma’s wishes, but later I discovered that this It does not change a person's destiny. Therefore, now I stubbornly grow thick and thick hair. It’s not just black. My hair has been dyed again and again, from the initial chestnut color to brown, and now to the burgundy color. I didn’t want to bother with it in this way, just to hide a secret, that is, my black hair is mixed with A lot of lonely gray hair, gray hair that has been there since I was young. Whenever I feel sad, I worry about whether one day I will wake up with a head full of gray. Therefore, I never dare to be sad easily, and I am afraid to see myself wither and grow old overnight. For this reason, I also want to make myself happy.

If one day you see a woman with unkempt eyebrows and tangled long hair on the streets of Changsha, it must be me. I also believe that on a sunny day, I will definitely meet a man who loves me, loves my long hair, and loves me. I will let his hand gently pass through my long hair, and I will use Treat him with a gentle smile throughout his life.

Fireworks Beggar and my website.

For so long, I have never known his real name. I only know that his QQ is called Fireworks Beggar.

I have always thought that he is a clever child. Calling him a child is actually unfair to him because he is a little older than me. The concept of a child in my mind is one that is lost, insecure, in pain, and in need of care. We are the same kind of people. But I think he is happier than me. Because he is on campus, he can deal with books every day and study. But I had already finished my studies, and my heart had already gone through vicissitudes of life.

We all like words, we all have our own sharp side, and we are all good at disguise. I never hide my sharpness in front of him, so we often bicker on QQ. He said he was not a good person and he said not to be too nice to others. But I think he is a good person and he is good to others. Otherwise, he would not carefully build an exquisite website for a woman he has never met. And do it very seriously. I see it in my eyes and remember it in my heart.

I really thank him.

Regarding the production of the website, I am a bystander and only watch the fun. I don't understand. However, I saw my words arranged so quietly inside, they were like my children, my lonely blood, and I heard the boiling sound. I look at them, caressing the wounds of the past, showing the sadness of loss. I look at them, and I am very happy. So, I want to thank Fireworks Beggar for making my own website. This is the best spring gift I have ever received.

Potato chips. Strange warmth.

Nan is my cousin’s friend. The first time we met was at a KTV near Bayi Road. All the people who came that day were my cousin’s friends and about a dozen strangers. Nan happened to be sitting next to me. He was a tall, quiet man. When I first sat down, I seemed very reserved. Later, as I got acquainted with him, I realized that his family lived not far from my house. It was just because I was used to living in seclusion, so I had never seen him before. Suddenly I felt a sense of intimacy, and I became no longer restrained. I sang a lot of songs that night and ate a large bag of potato chips without any image. He didn't talk much or sing, but he took good care of me. He poured me tea and blocked other people's attempts to persuade me to drink. Later, when he saw that I had eaten all the potato chips, he went to a nearby supermarket and bought me potato chips and milk. When the show was over, my cousin got drunk and was dragged to play cards by a group of people. He sent me downstairs and said to me: "Xiaoyi, your singing is very nice."

I heard it later He said he went back to his hometown, but I haven't seen him for a long time. When my cousin went to Fujian, he asked his friends to take care of my sister, so a few friends would come over often and occasionally call me to ask me to go out for dinner. That day I heard Nan calling my name downstairs. I ran downstairs and opened the door for him. I saw him smiling brightly and holding my favorite potato chips and milk in his hand. After entering the door, he carefully found the packaging bag of instant noodles in the trash can, and said in a reproachful tone: "Do you usually eat these preservative foods? Be careful and you will become a mummy." Then he went to the vegetable market and bought some of my favorite foods. The tofu and fish were cooked in the kitchen. I looked at this 180-centimeter-tall man, wearing an apron and cooking for himself. I felt inexplicably moved, but there was no heartbeat, because he was a man like an older brother and loved me so much. .

During that time, he came over often, and my stomach was well taken care of. I had endless potato chips. My brother's group of friends soon noticed the clues. Everyone knew that he liked me. I was the only one who pretended to be stupid and didn't know. I respected him like a brother. That day, he told me that he might go to Shanghai to work and asked me if I wanted him to go. I immediately answered him, I hope, of course I hope, why not go for a good job? Then, I saw his eyes dim instantly.

He booked the ticket and left some luggage with me. The night before he left, I heard him calling me downstairs in my sleepy eyes. I opened the door and felt him in the dark. Looking depressed, he said, he couldn't sleep and wanted to chat with me. I let him in and I played on the computer alone. He sat next to me and didn't speak. He was very nervous and seemed hesitant to speak. He was a person who made me feel very safe. After a long time, I looked up and saw that it was already 1 o'clock in the morning. When he saw the expression on my face as I looked at the clock, he said, "You must be sleepy. It doesn't matter. Just go to sleep. I'll watch over you."

I was afraid that he wouldn’t sleep and wouldn’t be able to survive the train ride, so I gave him the small bed and went to a nearby Internet cafe to surf the Internet alone in the cold spring rain. When I came back in the morning, he had already left. I didn't see him off on purpose. I saw the message he left on the note. He said that in his mind I was a pure girl and he wanted to take good care of me for the rest of his life, but he was afraid of being rejected by me and did not dare to say it.

Later, he sent me a text message on the train, telling me to eat and stop eating instant noodles, which made him worry. I was chewing the potato chips he gave me, drank too much cold water, and my stomach hurt terribly. When I saw his message, I burst into tears.

The fragments of memory are still there, and the cold spring will pass.

I still often go to Xinhua Bookstore to read, where I can compete with time and stay all day long. I am a child who grew up eating green vegetables and tofu. My childhood was a vast blank of poverty, narrow knowledge and shallow sadness, so I admit that my ignorance continues to this day, which is why I so extravagantly seek the warmth of words.

The essence of life is not romantic, it is an endless game of pursuit of interests, and a struggle for survival between daily necessities and daily necessities.

I want to grasp all the warm things in the world, but I am destined to be in vain.

Spring will pass soon. I am still the woman who has no love but likes to write love stories. I am still used to enjoying myself in my own space. I want to search for the missing tidbits of this spring in my memory. I want to use words to exhaust all memories as a farewell ceremony, and then choose to forget.

We suddenly meet in a blink of an eye, hoping that the fleeting years will pass and we will still be in the reincarnation of the world, and all the sorrows and troubles will be forgotten in the past.

Even if I forget your goodness.