Chaoshan marriage process

What preparations should be made for Chaoshan wedding customs? Chaoshan wedding customs are also different from Chaozhou and Shantou, so just listen to the elders over there

Chaoshan wedding customs for welcoming brides Chaoshan people are very particular about wedding customs. In the old days, they paid more attention to "clear matchmaking" "Recruitment". Although the etiquette and customs vary from place to place, the more consistent formulations and etiquette are: marriage proposal, marriage, betrothal, betrothal, asking for a date, and welcoming the bride, commonly known as the "six rites". Some also summarize it as "four rites": wedding, appointment, appointment, and marriage. Asking a matchmaker to propose a marriage, marrying and betrothal. "Proposing a marriage", "combining a marriage", and "betrothal" are the "written agreements" of the "Four Rites". First, the matchmaker goes to the man's and woman's homes to propose marriage. With the consent of the girl's family, the matchmaker will then go to the girl's family to ask for her name, date of birth, place of birth, and three generations of ancestors, and write a Geng note and send it to the man. If nothing unlucky happens in the man's family within three days (commonly known as "three days of success") , the man can give his Geng Tie to the woman, and both parties can predict the marriage (also called the marriage date). "Betrothal" is also called "engagement", "Xing Ding", and "Food Ding". The man prepares gifts and goes to the woman's home to make a marriage arrangement. The gift is usually a pair of gold earrings or a gold ring, as well as cakes, candies, etc. The woman must give a gift in return. When getting engaged, the man has to go to the woman's house to "eat a meal", usually eating sweet eggs or sweet noodles (if there are four sweet eggs, he can only eat two; if there are two, he can only eat one, and the other one has to be divided with chopsticks. two). Both men and women must send cakes, food, and sweet noodle soup to relatives, friends, and neighbors (remember, in the past, it was wine, cakes, and candy, which made people happy when they eat together) to report that the marriage has been decided. Choosing an auspicious date for marriage and organizing a dowry. "Bride marriage" is also known as "betrothal gift". It is a relatively solemn etiquette. There are strict regulations on the style of the wedding letter and the betrothal gift. Before the Qing Dynasty and the beginning of the Republic of China, in addition to gold, silver, and colorful satin, rich families would also give pigs, sheep, wine and fruits; poor families would not only give chickens and wine, but also betel nut; in most places, they would also give pork, commonly known as "washed meat". , to repay the woman’s parents for their kindness in raising her. In the 1960s and 1970s, in addition to gold and silver, they also gave away radios (televisions), bicycles, sewing machines and watches; now most of them receive bride price. After receiving the betrothal gift from the man, the woman will apply for reinstatement and reply with certain gifts, mainly including: Yuanyangjiao (banana with double I's, which symbolizes the closeness of husband and wife), pig liver and pig heart (indicating that the liver and gallbladder are of the same mind), and male and female chickens. One (symbolizing the pairing of mandarin ducks) and so on. When the woman is re-employing, she should also consider the elderly people in the groom's family. If the mother (grandmother) is in the family, she must give "mom cake" as an additional gift; if the grandfather is in the family, she should give "husband cake" as an additional gift. Before the girl's family gives the pig's heart to the boy's family, she must cut out a piece, cook it with sugar and green onions, and then eat it with her. After the boy's family receives the pig heart and liver from the girl's family, they must also cook it with sugar and green onions. After it is cooked, it is eaten with family, relatives and friends, which means "men and women are of the same mind". "Requesting date" is also called "selecting a date", "sending a date", and "proposing a date". After the betrothal ceremony, the man will choose an auspicious date for the wedding, including cutting the wedding dress, "turning face" and bathing, determining the time and hour of the wedding, and informing the woman. At this time, relatives and friends of both men and women will send congratulatory gifts. The congratulatory gift given to the woman is called "sending pollen". In addition to preparing the dowry, the woman must also prepare special items to bring with her when she gets married. The main ones are: first, 5 pairs of "sedan shoes", one pair each for spring, summer, autumn and winter, plus a pair of water shoes, which means that the husband and wife are united through thick and thin, *** The second is the black silk and the white silk chopsticks, which symbolize the birth of a child early after marriage, and the couple will grow old together; the third is a bowl each of orange cake and dried longan (commonly known as the "in-laws bowl"), which is used to worship the newlyweds. "Flower Mother", which symbolizes the sweetness of life, "Guizi orchid and grandchildren in front of the hall"; the fourth is fragrant powder and five-color silk thread. Before the woman gets married, she should use silk thread to "wrap her face", which means "to open her forehead" (to gain enlightenment and to be able to manage the household). On the first month and four months after her marriage, she also has to "wrap her face", which is commonly known as "wandering away from childbirth". The silk thread used in "rolling the noodles" should be hung on the pomegranate flowers; the fifth is red shells, wine cakes, mung beans, early millet, sesame and other five-color seeds, which means "the five sons have passed the exam" and the fortune is prosperous; the sixth is the "mandarin duck bellyband" ( Also known as "purse" or "waist bag"), one is used to hold five-color seeds and newly cut "Yuanyangcao" (double-planted thick vanilla) grass heads and a pair of "Ruyi", which symbolizes a married couple, forming a pair. Yes, good luck. The seventh is to twist brown sugar into a handkerchief. When the bride comes out of the palace, she should twist the handkerchief wrapped in brown sugar in her hand. After arriving at her husband's house, before covering the well, she should pour the brown sugar into the well, which means that the bride "keeps the inside and the outside together". "We cherish each other after passing through the door"; the eighth is "huatou", fan (homophone for "sending children"), etc. In the old days, when wealthy families married their daughters, in addition to the dowry and the above-mentioned special items, they also gave away fields and even birthday plates (coffins); now they give away electrical appliances, motorcycles or cars, etc. The ceremony of marrying the bride is grand. The last ceremony is "welcoming the bride (marrying)", that is, the man goes to the woman's house to marry the bride. There are two ways to welcome the bride: one is that the groom comes to greet the bride; the other is that a "lucky person" is sent to pick up the bride. The groom waits at the door of his home, and the bride is accompanied by a bridesmaid... >>

What are the wedding customs in Chaoshan? 1. Engagement

Cai Zemin's "Chaozhou Customs Record" has a more detailed record of Chaozhou wedding procedures, which are hereby transcribed as follows:

Proposing marriage, also known as marriage proposal. That is, the matchmaker goes to the man to propose marriage, or the matchmaker first goes to the man to introduce the woman's situation, and then the man approves and then the woman proposes marriage.

There are two steps in the marriage. After both parties approve the marriage proposal, the matchmaker will write the woman's name, birth date, place of origin, and three generations of ancestors into a Geng sticker and send it to the man.

If there are no unexpected or unlucky things happening in the man's house within three days, such as broken bowls, pots, etc., this is called "three good days". With this good sign, the man agreed to exchange Geng Tie. After changing the Geng Tie, they each ask someone to divine the marriage and confirm whether the man and woman are compatible with each other or are in conflict with each other. If they are in conflict with each other, the marriage will have to be aborted.

Engagement, after getting married, enters the engagement stage, that is, from the man preparing gifts to the woman setting the marriage. The gift is usually a pair of gold earrings or a gold ring. Some also give gold necklaces, as well as sugar and noodles, which are tokens of engagement. During the engagement ceremony, the woman should distribute candies and biscuits to relatives, friends and neighbors to inform her that the marriage has been decided. After the engagement, the betrothal gift will be given.

Exerting employment is also called sending employment. In the past, the betrothal gifts for the rich were gold, silver, colored satin, pigs, sheep, and wine and fruits; for the poor, betel nut, chicken and wine were nothing more. Chaozhou people regard betel nut as a symbol of good luck and good luck, and it is a unique wedding gift. Modern betrothal gifts include gifts in kind and cash. The physical items must be of at least four types each: sugar, noodles, Taiji (Teochew mandarin orange), gold and silver jewelry, cloth, cakes, etc., but it cannot be an odd number, it must be an even number. Cash is also called bride price, and it can be divided into one, two or four parts, but they are all multiples. When marriage by marriage was quite popular, the amount of bride price became the key to the success or failure of the marriage. In order to avoid naked bargaining, the two parties called the bride price a "tea ceremony", turning it into the man's reward for the woman's parents for raising a daughter. The "Tea Ceremony" is based on a load of tea. The two parties go through a matchmaker to decide on a load that both parties are satisfied with, and then exchange it for cash at the market price before hiring. Some men advance part of the "tea ceremony" as early as the engagement stage. This is the most commercialized example of transactional marriage (after liberation, this kind of transactional marriage has basically disappeared in Chaoshan area). During the betrothal gift, the woman must give a return gift, that is, return the cakes and food in the betrothal gift, and give "mandarin duck bananas", oranges, pig hearts, etc. in return. Mandarin duck bananas are two bananas growing side by side, symbolizing a hundred years of growing together; oranges are homophonic to "auspicious", symbolizing good luck; pig hearts (half of which is left on the woman) symbolizes unity. At this time, both parties should use the cakes and snacks from each other's gifts to distribute them solemnly to relatives, friends and neighbors to announce the wedding date. Relatives, friends and neighbors should also return gifts to express their congratulations.

Please wait. After the betrothal gift is given, the date of the wedding must be chosen and communicated to the woman, including when to cut the wedding dress, when to "pull the face" (opening the face, that is, twisting the hair on the face with a thread), when to take a bath, and when to take a bath. Marry etc. Most of the time for wedding invitations is in the dark. The trendy custom of keeping weddings at night is actually a legacy from ancient times. In ancient times, weddings always took place in the evening, so the bride-to-be must be welcomed after dusk, or even late at night. Therefore, "Shi Ming" defines marriage: "Marriage is a ritual when you are in the dark; marriage is when a woman is a matchmaker." "White Tiger Tongyi? Marriage Chapter" also says: "What is marriage? What is it in the dark? The ceremony is called marriage."

Girls from Raoping in eastern Guangdong, when they reach the marriageable age, they always run in groups during the Lantern Festival night in order to pray for a suitable husband. Go to the vegetable garden, sit on mustard greens (mustard greens, commonly known as mustard greens) and pray devoutly: "Sit on the mustard greens and you will marry a good son-in-law in the future." If the children are older and the marriage is delayed, of course the parents I feel anxious. Therefore, they often ask for a straw rope to bind tobacco leaves from other people's homes, take it home and mutter something like: "Anu's marriage star is gone."

The Raoping people pretended that the man gave it to the woman. After paying the bride price and betrothal gift, the woman should give back a piece of uncut pork, which is known as "mandarin duck meat" to show that "blood and flesh are connected". The bride is even more particular about bathing and dressing before getting married: flowers or leaves of twelve kinds of plants, including pomegranate, must be put into the bathtub. After bathing, the bride is asked to sit in the bathtub and eat two cooked eggs to pray for childbirth after marriage. Successful education. Moreover, the bride cannot sew bags inside or outside the clothes she wears, so as not to take away the luck of her parents.

2. Welcoming

Welcoming, this is the ceremony where the groom goes to the bride’s house to marry the bride, and it is also the most important procedure in the wedding. There are two types of wedding receptions: one is for the groom to welcome the bride, and the other is for the groom to ask a "lucky person" to welcome the bride on his behalf. Before the groom gets married, the bride has to "distribute money rice", that is, divide a lot of rice mixed with coins equally among the brothers and sisters in the family, which means... >>

Chaoshan side What are the wedding customs in Chaoshan? With the development of the times, the weddings of Chaoshan people have become more and more modern. Many young men and women have already got rid of the marriage custom of "the orders of their parents and the words of the matchmaker". However, traditional weddings still exist. Proposal of marriage, also known as marriage proposal. That is, the matchmaker goes to the man to propose marriage, or the matchmaker first goes to the man to introduce the woman's situation, and then the man approves and then the woman proposes marriage. Intermarriage. There are two steps here. After both parties approve the marriage proposal, the matchmaker will write the woman's name, birth date, place of origin, and three generations of ancestors into a Geng sticker and send it to the man. If there are no unexpected or unlucky things happening in the man's house within three days, such as broken bowls, pots, etc., this is called "three good days". With this good sign, the man agreed to exchange Geng Tie. After changing the Geng Tie, they each ask someone to divine the marriage and confirm whether the man and woman are symbiotic or incompatible with each other. engagement. After the marriage, the engagement stage begins, that is, from the man preparing gifts to the woman making a marriage arrangement. The gift is usually a pair of gold earrings or a gold ring. Some also give gold necklaces, as well as sugar and noodles, which are tokens of engagement.

During the engagement ceremony, the woman should distribute candies and biscuits to her relatives, friends and neighbors to inform her that the marriage has been decided. After the engagement, the betrothal gift will be given. Xingpin, also known as send-in. In the past, the betrothal gifts for the rich were gold, silver, colored satin, pigs, sheep, wine and fruits; for the poor, betel nut, chicken and wine were nothing more. Chaozhou people regard betel nut as a symbol of good luck and good luck, and it is a unique wedding gift. Modern betrothal gifts include gifts in kind and cash. The physical items must be of at least four types each: sugar, noodles, Taiji (Teochew mandarin orange), gold and silver jewelry, cloth, cakes, etc., but it cannot be an odd number, it must be an even number. Cash is also called bride price, and it can be divided into one, two or four parts, but they are all multiples. During the betrothal gift, the woman must give a return gift, that is, return the cakes and food in the betrothal gift, and give "mandarin duck bananas", oranges, pig hearts, etc. in return. Mandarin duck bananas are two bananas growing side by side, symbolizing a hundred years of togetherness; oranges are homophones of "auspicious", symbolizing good luck; and pig hearts (half of which is left on the woman) symbolizes unity. At this time, both parties should use the cakes and snacks from each other's gifts to distribute them solemnly to relatives, friends and neighbors to announce the wedding date. Relatives, friends and neighbors should also return gifts to express their congratulations. During the application period and after the betrothal gift is given, the date of marriage must be chosen and communicated to the woman, including notifying the woman when to cut the wedding dress, when to "turn face", when to bathe, when to marry, etc. Most weddings take place in the dark, and the trendy custom of maintaining weddings at night is actually a legacy from ancient times. Welcoming, this is the ceremony where the groom goes to the bride's house to marry the bride, and it is also the most important procedure in the wedding. There are two types of wedding receptions: one is for the groom to welcome the bride, and the other is for the groom to ask a "lucky person" to welcome the bride on his behalf. At this time, the bride often bursts into tears, which is called "crying for marriage". On the one hand, they cry because they are far away from their parents. On the other hand, it is said that only by shedding tears can the mother's family become rich. When the colorful sedan arrives at the door of the husband's house, the husband's family will set off firecrackers to welcome it. The groom kicks the sedan with his feet, rolls up the curtain, pulls off the Ruyi hair from the bride's head, and pricks the bride on her forehead. Kicking the sedan chair and tying Ruyi are intended to give the bride power: everything from now on must be as her husband wants. This is a hint of husband power. Then the bride, with the support of the bridesmaid, stepped over a pile of burning "fire smoke" under the threshold. After the bride enters the house, accompanied by the "Qing Niang Mu" invited by her husband's family, she and the groom have a "shared room consummation", enter the bridal chamber, and go to the hall to serve tea to their elders and peers, etc. At this time, Qing Niang's mother should be reciting songs of praise. On the day of the bride's wedding, the mother's family will send her brother-in-law to give lily soup to the husband, hoping that the bride will be happy with everyone in her husband's family. The next day, the bride will be given fungus and pig heart soup, hoping that the bride will not forget her family members. Only the third time can I stay at my parents’ house for a few days and express my feelings about missing my parents. There is also a custom of giving "sister money" to girls here when they get married. "Sisters' money" is given by the groom who comes to marry the bride to her younger siblings, usually 4 yuan, 40 cents and 8 cents. Giving money to sisters is given to a man and a woman on behalf of each other, which means "good". 448 points, which means "good things for the world" and "never be separated (for the world)". When the groom is decorating his new house, he must hold a solemn "bed-laying" ceremony. When setting up the bed, a fortune teller is invited to choose a date, and there is also a special emphasis on the orientation of the head of the bed. When setting up your bed, you should do "four sentences" for good luck. When the bride puts on heavy makeup and is about to get into the sedan chair, the bride's family will bring a basin of water and pour it on the sedan chair. While pouring it, they say: "Pour the bowl water on the sedan chair and the bride will become new." The couple is getting married. Bride's wishes. However, now, of course, it is no longer the sedan chair, but bicycles, motorcycles, and cars. In the past, the bride had to have two pairs of wooden shoes in her trousseau. In addition to being convenient for daily life, it also means "growing old together" or "following the same footsteps." After the bride comes home, she has to get up early the next morning to cook and make a bowl of sweet rice herself. After the husband, mother-in-law and husband's brothers and sisters get up, they will be invited to taste some. ......>>

What steps and verses are needed to marry a daughter in Chaoshan (concise) "Chaoshan people marry their daughters" Marrying a "traitor" is one of the four major events in the family . Folk customs are deeply rooted and passed down from generation to generation. People follow traditional etiquette and place their good wishes on wedding etiquette. The strong local color forms the interesting folk customs in Chaoshan area...

Young men and women are matchmakers. After the marriage is proposed and both parties agree, if the birth signs of the man and woman are consistent, and if their respective families live normally within three days, and no unlucky things such as breaking a bowl or loosening a barrel hoop, etc., happen, then the engagement can be made. No matter how much the bride price is, it must not be an odd number but must be an even number, and the denomination must be both large and small. The bride price should always be placed face up, with a large amount at the bottom and a small amount at the top. Roll it into a tube, seal it with red paper, and wrap it with a token (a souvenir given by the man to the woman). This relies on the fact that men and women have distinct generations, some are older and some are younger, and they come in pairs. If the bride price is not given by the man himself but entrusted to the woman by the Yue Lao, if the Yue Lao has not yet married, her parents should be alive; if she has married, the husband and wife should be in pairs. Because "there is no right or wrong in marriage, and there is no right or wrong in marriage." This is for the sake of good luck and winning the jackpot.

On top of the daughter's dowry burden, there is a bunch of branches. This is a gift specially given by the mother to her daughter, named "Qingtou". "Qingtou" is very interesting, because in rural areas, men who do things that should be done by their wives and are obedient to their wives are called "Qingtou". The "green head" that the mother gave to her daughter was to make her son-in-law a "green head man". When the dowry arrives at the door of the husband's house, one end of the "green head" must enter first, and then the person giving the dowry will place it on the top shelf of the newlyweds' bed so that the groom can always see it and remind himself to always be considerate and caring for his wife. Wife, be a true “model husband”.

On the day of her wedding, her daughter will share rice with her brothers.

The mother would put money and rice on the dustpan or bamboo sieve, shake it vigorously, and chant while shaking it: "If you shake it round, your children and grandchildren will be rich; if you shake it evenly, you will have a male grandson next year." Then she puts the money and rice. According to the number of brothers and daughters, each will be divided into one share. The daughter took the rice money and put it together with the engagement token into the bellyband specially made for her wedding. On the third day after arriving at her husband's house, she puts the money and rice into the rice urn at her husband's house and gives the token to her husband for safekeeping. In addition, coins should be placed on the clothes and utensils brought by the woman when she gets married, and money should be placed in every bag of the dress she wears. This implicitly wishes the newlyweds family happiness, wealth and prosperity from generation to generation (bag bag). On the morning of her daughter's wedding, she has to have breakfast with her parents and brothers, but other women are not allowed to attend. If parents or brothers are absent due to business reasons, they should also prepare a place with bowls and spoons to serve the rice to express completeness. At breakfast, the parents used long noodles (which is homophoned as "longevity") to wish their daughter good health and longevity, a happy family, and all the best after her marriage. After eating pork liver and stir-fried onions, the daughter becomes smart, can respect her parents-in-law, care for the younger generation, and be harmonious to her neighbors. This is called pork liver and fried onions, and eating it will make you "tonglang" (meaning smart).

When a daughter gets married and leaves home, she should bow to her parents and repay their kindness for raising her. The meaning is: Parents, parents, my daughter has grown up and is about to embark on a new life as a daughter-in-law. She cannot serve her parents at home. I hope my parents will take care of their bodies. I wish my parents are as blessed as the East China Sea and live as long as the Southern Mountains. The parents held their daughter's hands, received her blessing, and sent her out to the door. Daughters are like fledglings leaving the nest at this time, shedding tears out of deep feelings for their children. This emotional phenomenon is called the custom of crying to give some juice to the brothers to make money for the family, wishing the brothers to be rich and prosperous. The child is the mother's heart and soul. For the happiness of the daughter, the mother should carry "safflower water" and spray it on her daughter when she goes out. While spraying, she should recite: "Safflower water, spray on the sedan chair, 'walking boy'" becomes "Madam's milk is like this; red flower water is sprayed to the sky, and the 'Zouzi' is close to the inside and outside." This expresses the hope for a happy new life for the daughter, and also serves as a parting message for the daughter to deal with others in the future.

In her daughter’s dowry, there is a box of sewing needles and a bone comb specially prepared by her mother for her daughter. The dowry may be small, but needles and combs are indispensable. After the daughter arrived at her husband's house, she would give the needles to her mother-in-law and neighbor's grandmothers and aunts and other elders respectively. According to folklore, needles are used to "sew" the mouths of the ladies tightly, hoping for guidance in everything; those who receive the needles all praise their young daughters-in-law as wise, well-informed and knowledgeable about etiquette, and they also understand the secrets. Even if the bride is a little surly, she always If you want to give me a needle, you can forgive me and reduce the trouble. Another common saying about giving needles and combs is to mean that the daughter-in-law should use needles to "sew" her mouth, and not to imitate parrots and stir up trouble; when encountering trouble, she must be reasonable and wise, as hard as a bone comb, and like a comb for unkempt hair. Keep things organized. (End) Dinner with friends last night... >>

Regarding Chaoshan wedding customs, this is called the return door

Chaoshan wedding customs of marriage proposal Chaoshan wedding customs are like Chaozhou Shantou It's also different, so just listen to the elders over there.

What is the custom of Chaoshan people in marrying wives? Three Matchmaking and Six Certificates

In the old days, it was a popular custom that all marriages between children must follow ancient etiquette and customs, pay attention to etiquette, and must possess the three matchmaking and six certificates.

Three matchmakers: The first is the "matchmaker's words", the marriage of the children must be matched through the matchmaker, and the respective situations are conveyed to the male and female families; the second is the "parents' orders", the parents of the children and the children listen to After hearing the words of the matchmaker, and after considering it, they think they can match each other, and then allow their marriage; the third is "token as a token". After the parents of the man and woman agree to the marriage of their children, the man and woman give each other a thing as a token, and the marriage is settled. The marriage is coming.

Six certificates: These are the six daily necessities that the bride brings with her from home: shengzi, used to measure the amount of food in the family, which is convenient for careful planning and thrifty housekeeping; scissors, used for cutting clothes; ruler, used for It is used to measure clothes and cloth, and determine the length and width; the mirror is used to look at the appearance and beautify oneself; the scale is used to weigh the weight of things to facilitate buying and selling; the abacus is used to clear warehouses and settle accounts to know the income and expenditure balance.

Three matchmakers and six certificates are necessities in Chaoshan marriage etiquette and customs, and they were measured in ancient times. Legal standards for female marriage.

Proposing a marriage

Proposing a marriage, also known as nacai in ancient times, is commonly known as asking a matchmaker to propose marriage, that is, the matchmaker goes to the man to propose marriage, or the matchmaker first goes to the man to introduce the woman's situation, and then the man approves it. Ask a matchmaker to go to the woman's house to propose marriage.

In the past, marriage was considered legal only if it was determined by the matchmaker's words and the parents' orders. During the Republic of China, the trend of free marriage and love had affected urban and rural areas, and parents gradually took into account the opinions of their children. But even if they are in love with each other, many people still ask matchmakers to seek marriage in order to avoid rumors of sexual relations and to comply with local and clan rules. In the early days of the founding of the People's Republic of China, the Communist Party of China stipulated the autonomy of marriage, abolished feudal sales and arranged marriages, and the marriage law was well implemented in urban and rural areas, and the relationship between trusting matchmakers was gradually abolished. In the past two decades, the civil affairs department and the private sector have successively set up a number of marriage agencies to guide and pave the way for some older young people who are not good at sociability and meet the needs of many men and women.

Integrated marriage

Integrated marriage, also known as asking for names in ancient times, means that after both men and women propose marriage and approve it, the matchmaker writes the woman's name, birth date, place of origin, and three generations of ancestors in a Geng Tie and sends it to Male. The groom's family asks a fortune teller to predict whether the birth dates of both men and women will match or conflict.

After the astrologers calculated that the horoscopes of both parties are compatible and the zodiac signs will not conflict, they write the male and female Geng stickers on red paper and press them in front of the Kitchen God with two bowls of water. After three days, if they are clean as before, it will be good luck and they will fall into the God of Stove. Dirt is unlucky. Light two incense sticks at the same time. If they burn out neatly, it means that the couple can grow old together. If they burn them out unevenly, it means that the two people are not destined to be lovers and cannot get married. And if there are no unexpected or unlucky things happening in the man's family within three days, such as sudden illness of parents or brothers, death of livestock, broken dishes, etc., this is called "three good days". With this good sign, the man agreed to exchange Geng Tie. After changing the Gengtie, the woman's family asks someone to divine the marriage and confirm whether the man and woman are compatible or incompatible. If they are incompatible, the marriage will have to be cancelled. If they are compatible, they will enter the engagement stage.

"Etiquette and Literary Weddings" records that the ancient ritual of asking for a name is "Bin Zhiyan (a geese is a migratory bird that "falls in the south and flies in the north"), please ask the name of the host." After agreeing, the guest entered, and the guest began to say "asking for a name": "Since I have been ordered to perform divination, whose surname do you dare to ask the woman to be?" He asked the woman's name in a humble tone. The divination mentioned here is divination. Male and female birth dates, yin and yang horoscopes, such as marriage, good or bad luck, etc. The wedding ceremony is the most superstitious part of the wedding. When divination, many taboos such as age, zodiac sign, and whether the five elements are in conflict must be considered.

Birthday taboos: The popular custom is that boys are generally older than girls, but the age difference of three or six years is taboo. The superstitious people say it is the "three-year-old penalty" and the "six-year-old conflict": after a marriage of three years apart, the family will not be in good shape. In harmony, there is a six-year age difference between each other, and the couple cannot grow old together; in a year, the 13th day of the first lunar month, the 11th day of February, the 9th day of March, the 7th day of April, the 5th day of May, the 3rd day of June, the 1st day of July, and the 27th day of August , September 25th, October 23rd, November 21st, and December 19th are respectively "Yang Gong's Death Day". It is very unlucky to marry a woman born on these days. It is believed that "sheep" and "yang" have the same pronunciation, so it is taboo for women born in the year of sheep to be born on "Yang Gong's death day". Because June 6 is the customary "Ghost Festival", it is also taboo to marry a woman born on this day. In addition, it is also taboo to marry a woman born in the zodiac sign "Po Yue" in the year of birth.

Zodiac sign taboos: Chaoshan folk believe that the zodiac sign is connected with a person’s character, and that a person’s temperament is similar to that of the zodiac sign. The taboos related to the zodiac sign are mainly for women. For example, if a woman is born in the year of tiger, the tiger is ferocious in nature and will overwhelm her husband. Women born in the first half of the night are especially taboo, as such women are considered to be tigers that come down the mountain to look for food, and they must not be married; those born in the second half of the night are tigers that go up the mountain, and the tigers are full... >>

Before welcoming the bride, the groom must hold a solemn "bed-laying" ceremony when decorating the new house. It is important to choose an auspicious day when setting up the bed, and the direction of the head of the bed is also important. After setting up the bed, a couplet saying "Good luck setting the bed" and "Qilin is here" should be pasted on the bed, and then a boy is asked to lie down on the bed for a while, which means that a baby will be born early.