When you experienced a series of domestic violence and cheating by your parents when you were a child?

What we think in our minds and what we can actually feel are often inconsistent. This is why we often say: We understand the truth, but we still can't live this life well. What we think about is usually obtained from others, but what we can actually feel belongs to us.

From your simple description, I guess it may be that your parents' intimacy issues have affected you and they have set a bad example for you. The intimacy you feel with another person may not be great. In your mind, emotional intimacy is associated with violence and cold war. So you would rather shield your feelings and not give others the chance to hurt you. But obviously such an approach will keep you living in the shadow of your parents' feelings and make you lose the opportunity to seek your own happiness.

Of course, I have said so much. Even if you feel it makes sense, these are still "what you are thinking in your head." To transform these into feelings and let yourself go, you can find a professional A counselor helps you.

Harbin Hexin Psychological Counseling Center