The son said: Mom, I hate working hard, why should I work hard?

On the weekend a few weeks ago, I had some things to go to the office to handle, and OK happened to be idle at home, so I took him with me.

The office is about 1 km away from my home, and it takes about 15-20 minutes to walk one way. I also plan to take OK there that day. But I didn't expect that the temperature was extremely high and the weather was boring. As soon as I walked out of the community, I was already sweating. OK, I said reflexively: "Mom, let's call Didi, quickly call Didi."

Although the heat is a bit hot, it is not unbearable. Today's children are really raised too delicately. I said to him: "Mom's company is very close, we will be there in a short walk."

Finally, when we reached the first intersection, he screamed again "I can't walk anymore! Why are we so tired?"

Looking at his slimy appearance, I really want to knock him out

. And the sentence "Why are you so tired?" seemed to prick my sensitive point. It was painful and hateful, and I didn't know how to answer. With such a mood, I replied angrily,

"I can't bear it for just a few minutes!" Due to my intimidation, OK immediately fell silent and walked forward silently with his head lowered.

Although I knew in my heart that the best way to deal with it was to speak well and encourage and communicate in a language he could understand and accept; but at that time I was sweating all over and thinking in my mind They are all: hurry to the office and get the work done, and there is no extra thought to find words in your mind. .

Language is the most miraculous educational magic. Whether a thing will lead to happiness or collapse depends on "how you express it and how you word it."

Although we very much hope to help our children establish a positive thinking perspective and positive attitude towards things through daily verbal communication, things are counterproductive and the communication between us and our children is often not smooth. Sometimes it is because our wording and expression are not skillful enough; sometimes it is because the children's questions are not easy to answer, such as "Why do people endure pain?", "Why do I not know how to do my homework when my father scolds me?" "Why do children always like to laugh at others?"... More often than not, we don't know the answer ourselves and get angry when our children ask, such as "Why don't I like reading?", "Mom, I hate working hard. Why should I work hard? "...

It is not easy to answer every question of your child. I just happened to read a book recently, "Larouse's Little Encyclopedia of Child Psychology" compiled by French clinical psychologist and children's mental health therapist Carine Simone. All 60 questions that are easy to answer or that children want to ask but have never asked out loud are included in it. After reading it, I really feel like "enlightened"!

So today I picked out 12 questions and answers from this book and shared them with you.

It has to be said that for many children's problems, it is really necessary to rely on the professionalism of psychologists to give interesting and intelligent answers that children can listen to, understand.

Mom knows this kind of dream can scare you. Because you feel that what you experience in your dream is real. When you wake up, you don't know if you are in reality or in a dream.

At this time, you can turn on the lights to confirm that no changes have occurred in your room. Your body will slowly calm down and your mother will appear in front of you immediately.

Nightmares are like horror movies on TV, they are not real. Just like watching TV, when you find yourself having nightmares, you can also tell your brain to switch channels - you can focus on the funny scenes that happened during the day, such as the jokes you told with your friends, the food you ate at night. Delicious chicken legs arrived. Soon you will be able to go back to sleep peacefully.

Dear, Mom knows that you don’t want to feel pain, and this is the same for all of us. However, experiencing pain can make us react, make us change, and make us grow.

Let me give you an example that I think is particularly good.

Do you know what a pearl is? Pearls are produced from oysters. When a grain of sand enters the oyster shell, the oyster protects itself by spitting out nacre to surround the grain of sand. It is this act of resisting pain that allows pearls to form, which is how the pearls on my mother’s necklace were formed. Therefore, pearls actually mean healed wounds. Oysters will not produce pearls if they are not injured.

You see, some accidents in life can cause scars, but these scars can also turn into very beautiful things.

Let me tell you a story: There was a Japanese doctor who once conducted an experiment. He took two jam bottles, washed them, dried them, and then put the same amount of jam bottles into them. of rice. Label one bottle "I like you" and the other "I hate you." Then, put the two bottles together in a dark room.

Every day, each member of the family says a kind, complimentary word to the bottle labeled "I like you" and a mean word to the bottle labeled "I hate you." These words need to be spoken from the heart.

After a few weeks, the rice that was often praised was still good, while the other bottle of rice started to turn black and moldy. Look, does this experiment tell us how harmful words can be?

Do you want the people around you to be like moldy rice?

Reading is like opening the door to the world of imagination. Once you step through the door, you're likely to encounter stunning scenery and interesting characters.

It's like traveling in another world, full of new things, sometimes even a new era. You may even think that you are in the story, that you are actually living it.

Reading can help you learn new words. Over time, your spelling will become better and you will not make mistakes again. This is also useful for taking dictations in your classes! Moreover, focused reading will enhance your concentration and allow you to remember what you have read. Therefore, reading books can make your brain smarter!

So we want to thank these books and great authors for sending so much great and outstanding wisdom into our hands.

You don’t like to work hard, because in the process of hard work, you need to change your habits and consume your own energy! It’s true that our brains don’t like effort.

I'll try to explain to you why. Imagine that your brain looks like a big, big forest with many paths. You walk home through one of these paths every day, and because you pass it over and over again, it sinks deeper and deeper.

But one day, the original path is blocked by many branches, and you need to change direction and try to take a new route. This requires a lot of courage, because in the process of moving forward, you will encounter obstacles, thorns, roots... You need to move forward slowly step by step until you are getting closer and closer to your goal. At this time, you will start to feel proud of yourself and appreciate the hard work you have put in.

This is the case in everything we do. For example, if your mother asks you to go to basketball class, you actually don’t want to go. You will find various excuses not to go to basketball class. Like the little warrior who just walked a new path in the forest, you will have to traverse an uncomfortable zone to go to basketball class. Your brain needs to work harder and expend more energy. It all makes you feel unhappy. To work hard is to learn to put happiness aside for the time being.

But if you can proactively take this step, accept more training, and put in more effort, you will become more and more comfortable in playing, and you will definitely like basketball classes. , you'll be glad you were able to do this.

We don’t like to say “no” because many times we don’t want to hurt others and we are afraid of making them angry. Saying "no" takes courage. It requires confidence in yourself and your ideas, and the courage to express them.

To say "no" is to listen to what is going on inside of us.

Imagine that you have a compass inside your body. This compass moves with the signals from your body and the small voice inside, pointing out the path you should take.

For example, if a friend suggests you do something you don’t want to do, then at this time, ask the compass in your body.

If she asks you to accompany her to steal candy, what will the little voice in your heart say? "Go?" "Don't go?" "Is this good?" "Is this bad?" "Is this right?" "Do I want to go?" "I don't want to go?"

If you feel uncomfortable, it means that there is something wrong with your body. Signal. In this case, your internal compass will most likely tell you to say "no." You have the right to say "no" because it is neither what you want nor does it do you any good.

Don't be afraid to say "no" because you're afraid of being called "unkind". Over time, you'll end up getting angry with yourself and exploding like popcorn!

Many people are afraid of speaking in public. , the same goes for adults.

Speaking in public is not an easy task.

You stand alone on the stage, and there are so many pairs of eyes watching you below, and you will think about many things: others will judge you, criticize you, laugh at you... Then, you will forget what you have learned, or even forget everything. Remembered.

Faced with such a terrible thing, let's take a deep breath and don't think about those bad situations. Tell yourself gently: You are not alone in your fear of speaking in front of the class. You are already very brave to stand in front of the whole class.

If you listen carefully to the lecture, the knowledge you have learned is there, in your mind, and has not disappeared! You may blush, but it will pass soon.

If you act bravely this time, you will be confident the next time you encounter the same situation.

If you ask this question, you must be a smart child. Only smart children can think of this question.

It is a mistake to say that you are not smart just because you did not do well in school. So, what does it mean to be smart?

Intelligence refers to the ability that since the birth of human beings, everyone has found their own way to survive so that human beings will not become extinct. It can be seen that intelligence is actually a survival instinct.

Moreover, the same is true for animals and plants. Although plants do not have brains, they can adapt to the environment in which they live.

Smartness is like a treasure chest, filled with various resources that can be combined with each other. In your treasure chest, there are the ability to understand, the ability to learn, the ability to adapt...and curiosity about the world or other things. These resources, you must take good care of them and let them grow. Going to school, reading, walking in nature, playing with friends, riding a bike, playing a musical instrument, hugging your parents, all of these will increase your intelligence.

However, I also want to tell you something important. In order not to waste resources, you must work hard.

Do you know the story of "The Tortoise and the Hare"?

The tortoise challenged the hare, saying that he would reach the finish line before the hare. The hare accepted the challenge because he knew he would win because he could run much faster than the tortoise. Therefore, during the game, the rabbit did many things he liked: playing, eating, and sleeping... The tortoise remained patient, focused and tenacious. It climbed forward step by step and finally won the game!

Yes, you are smart. If you work hard, your smartness will become a super power.

No one likes to be bored. You feel annoyed when you have nothing to do, because doing nothing leaves a large void of time and space that terrifies you.

However, if you are willing to slowly approach these blank spaces and take a look inside, you will find that they are not scary, and you may even find surprises inside.

Do you know why?

When you are bored, your brain becomes an explorer! Do you remember when I explained to you that the brain is like a big forest with many paths in it? There are some paths that you are already familiar with and will choose to take them out of habit, and there are also some secret passages! But, out of fear, you try to avoid these new roads! However, when you are bored, your brain will want to explore these new paths because it will easily make you curious.

What do you think you’ll find on these new roads? What a fantastic idea! It is boredom that prompts you to come up with new ideas.

When you have emotions like fear or anger, your body sends you signals. You may feel a big ball in your stomach, a tightness in your throat, or a rise in body temperature, which are all signs that something is making you uncomfortable. If you don't listen to these signals from your body, your emotions can build up and become a big ball stuck in there.

You see, it's a bit like poop... When you feel uncomfortable in your stomach, you can come and talk to your mother right away, and the pressure will be much less.

You can also breathe calmly on your own, focusing on the air moving in and out of your body.

You can even put a finger under your nose like a beard and give it a good sniff.

These bad emotions will disappear and the poop will come out.

Your body is like your house, you will live there your whole life. The body is smarter than any computer. It can automatically maintain balance, allowing you to maximize your health.

Therefore, you must take good care of your body and accurately accept the signals sent by your body.

How to find real friends? Just like the vegetables you grow in your garden. You sow some seeds, water them every day, and watch them grow.

You still have to deal with the weather and the pests...then the vegetables ripen and you reap the fruits of your labor.

The process of finding good friends is the same. In the beginning, you are attracted to another person and want to see her again quickly. As you spend more and more time together, you will also find various small flaws in her, which will make you feel very irritated.

This requires us to make efforts to understand each other in the process of getting along, and to eliminate the conflicts between two people just like we deal with pests and diseases.

When you find a real good friend, you will look forward to seeing her every day, and you will be very happy when you see her; you can also tell her your secrets, and she will She will definitely keep your secrets; when you are sad, she will comfort you, make you happy, and share her favorite cookies with you.

She won't always be there for you, but she's there if you need her.

Child, first of all, you must know that no one has the right to laugh at you. If you feel excluded by everyone, and the situation is serious. You need to talk to the teacher.

Some children like to make fun of others. Maybe it’s because they themselves have been teased by others, or something bad happened at home. There are also some children who watch so many violent movies or videos that they eventually become numb and do not realize that they are hurting others.

What you have to do is stop listening to what they say and don't respond in any way. They will definitely feel bored and stop attacking you. Just because you don't do what they do doesn't mean you're weak. Instead, you should be proud of not responding to them.

In a journal you can write down the things you want to say to them and the things that make you angry. You can also shout in the mirror! It will make you feel much more comfortable.

If this happens again, you can go to an adult for protection.