If that thing didn’t happen essay 450 to 500

If that incident had not happened, how could my jade buttocks have been severely damaged.

It was a dark night, and in the desolate and deep sky, a bright and evil light flashed across the sky. I woke up suddenly and couldn't help shouting: "Oh, oh, oh, shooting star!"

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I subconsciously turned on the radio with only two stations, which was broadcasting the weather forecast. I only heard a middle-aged man shouting passionately: "Tonight, there will be a wave in the Tiankeng constellation." A powerful meteor shower!"

I was so surprised that I narrowed my mouth, which was only the size of a woodpecker, into a tight circle: "The business of weather forecasting is really extensive, it must be extraordinary. If there is something with the word "rain" in it, they can't ignore it. "

Just as I was thinking wildly, clues began to appear in the sky, but I saw thousands of firelights flowing across the sky, and for a while, the sky became bright and full of sparks. I got excited together with the middle-aged man on the radio, and I felt like something was about to burst out from my chest. I suppressed it again and again, but finally couldn't resist the collision of passion in my heart. I immediately decided to look up to the sky and recite a poem: " It rains heavily during the Qingming Festival..."

After finally chanting, I imitated the ancients, wiped my chin gracefully, and nodded: "Yo Xi, It is indeed a good poem. But wait, when did I have a beard! I, my heaven and the bright moon, I am obviously still a young man, but why do I have a beard?”

Second Oh my god, I made up my mind to go to the supermarket, only to find that with the development of science and technology, there are already electric razors in the world! I was at a loss when the amiable saleswoman told me great news! I saw her secretly taking out an advertisement that read: Buy a razor and get an electric razor for free.

I was shocked and immediately spent 7 yuan and 30 cents to buy them without hesitation! When I got home, I first unpacked the razor and found that there was a faint message printed on it. The word pencil? I didn't care at the time, so I hurriedly opened the package of the electric shaver. After opening it, I was so wise and brave that I immediately discovered the conspiracy!

Damn it! It turned out that it was just a box for loading blades, but what about the wires on its butt? Just when I was wondering about my "sister", my father, who was busy splicing circuits at home, happened to have one short one. So, I decisively donated the only useful part of the gift without hesitation.

That night, maybe it was because I was full from dinner. Feeling depressed by the chrysanthemum, I anxiously came to the latrine, turned on the light, took off my pants, and after a loud and intense prelude, I got down to business on the latrine pit.

Suddenly, the lights in the hut unexpectedly changed in orderly light and dark. This sad feeling was like a group of road hooligans flashing lights and honking horns behind the scenes. urging a young man who was doing business.

There was a "boom". A splash of fire ignited the marsh gas in the latrine, and I became incontinent. . . And my jade buttocks, why is it black?

Afterwards, I was lying on the hospital bed, thinking hard about the causes and consequences of this incident. I thought, if there hadn't been that meteor falling from the sky, I wouldn't have gotten up and recited poetry, wouldn't have touched my beard, and wouldn't have bought a fake product worth 7 yuan and 30 cents. Naturally, there would have been no future. There's a leakage in the wire.

The big case was finally solved, "If it hadn't been for that meteor, I should still be safe and sound...

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