Basic common sense of speech etiquette

There is a certain art of speaking to make both parties feel comfortable. Below is the "basic common sense of speech etiquette" that I have compiled for you. It is for reference only. I hope you like it! Please click to view more details. Basic common sense of speech etiquette

1. Speech - reflects your level of cultivation

Be polite before you speak, and be more polite once you speak.

⑴ When speaking, you should pay attention to the other party’s mentality and timing.

That means considering whether the other party can understand, whether he is interested, and how receptive he is. On special days and specific moments, a heartfelt congratulation and a sincere compliment will definitely have the icing on the cake effect; when others are in trouble or depressed, a considerate greeting and sincere encouragement will be even more important. The effect of providing help in times of need.

⑵ Do not tell lies, empty words, or big words

"The wolf is coming" can only tease people once or twice, and you will definitely be punished the third time. Framing, hurting, and slandering others are extremely harmful to people. The physical wounds of being beaten are easy to heal, but the psychological trauma of being wronged is difficult to heal.

Those who talk empty words and big words may confuse people for a while, but they will never deceive them for a long time. In this case, "taking a long time to see a person's heart" means that what you see is a shallow heart and an untrustworthy person.

⑶ Pay attention to distinguishing between polite words and irony

In daily life and social interaction, there is another type of "insincere speech" phenomenon, which is due to specific needs and conventions and cannot be regarded as Hypocrisy and disrespect.

The polite words used in social situations, such as "I have long admired you," "It's a pleasure to meet you," "I'm here in my humble home," "Pengpi will add splendor," etc., are obviously a bit exaggerated, but they make the other person feel comfortable and respected. , has become a customary social politeness, and it is an expression of good manners.

Among relatives and friends, especially lovers, they often say things like "enemies", "hate you so much", etc., and there is no need to worry about them. These joking irony complement each other and treat each other as guests, which is also a kind of expression. The spice of life.

2. Emotion - the key to whether it sounds pleasant or not

Human beings are the most emotional advanced animals, and receiving courtesy can satisfy their self-esteem needs. Therefore, speaking must be emotional.

⑴ Be sincere. When talking to others, your expression should be focused and your attitude should be sincere and cordial. When expressing congratulations, the expression should be enthusiastic. If you only have a pleasant mouth and a cold expression, it will be considered perfunctory or even sarcastic. When talking to others, you should look attentive. It would be rude to look around, be careless, or answer questions you don't want to ask.

⑵ Be good at listening. When the other party speaks, we should listen carefully and often use some communicative body language, such as nodding, etc. This can make the other party feel that they are valued. Never show disinterest or interrupt the other person.

⑶ Subtle differences. Human words are rich and colorful, and the emotions expressed are completely different with just one word difference. For example: sit down, sit down, please sit down, please take a seat; drink tea, please drink tea, please use tea, which makes people clearly feel the difference in the level of courtesy received.

⑷ Be strict with yourself. The speaker must have empathy, put himself in others' shoes, be strict with himself, and be lenient to others.

3. Skills - speaking with art

⑴ Must have role awareness. When speaking, you should pay attention to the identity of yourself and the other person. It is never polite to distinguish between priorities and priorities.

⑵ Be considerate of others. As the saying goes, "the speaker has no intention, but the listener has the intention." Therefore, the speaker should consider the emotions of others and not inadvertently hurt the self-esteem of others and cause embarrassment. You have to consider whether the audience understands you, so try to speak in words that everyone can understand. Be considerate and speak with kindness. Also be careful not to ignore people with low social status, poor appearance, or low self-esteem at gatherings.

⑶ Consider the wording. Frankness is certainly a good character, but on many occasions it is not appropriate to speak directly, otherwise it will be a lack of education and may cause misunderstanding and embarrassment. When dining in a hotel or attending a banquet, you must not talk about going to the toilet or toilet. If you have to, you can only talk about going to the bathroom.

⑷ Learn to be humorous. Humor is one of the most interesting, contagious and universal communication arts, because humor can make the atmosphere relaxed and active.

4. Title - the beginning of communication with others

In interpersonal communication, title reflects one's own upbringing, the degree of the relationship between the two parties and social customs.

Affinity titles: father, mother, uncle, aunt, third uncle, second uncle, eldest brother, second sister, aunt, uncle, aunt, cousin, cousin, etc. This is commonly used in family life and family gatherings. It is called according to seniority and status, making it appear cordial and warm.

Workplace titles: Appropriate to the person’s position, professional title, etc., such as “Dean Sun”, “Professor Lin”, “Teacher Zheng”, “Manager Chen”, “Doctor Wang”, etc. This is a common title to show distinction and respect.

Name-based address: First, addressing someone by first and last name is rather blunt and is only used in a few occasions such as meetings. Second, just call the person by his surname, and add "Lao, Xiao" and other prefixes before the surname, such as "Lao Zhang" and "Xiao Huang", which are more respectful and easy-going and more commonly used; add a suffix to the surname, such as "Wang Lao" Such people have great respect and can only treat those with high moral standards. Third, just calling someone by their first name is more cordial and is often used by elders to address younger generations, and is used among relatives, friends, classmates, colleagues, and neighbors. Generic address: For those whose name, position and identity are unknown, a general honorific can be used. In companies and service industries, men are called "Mr.", unmarried women are called "Miss", and married women are called "Ms."; in shopping, asking for directions and other occasions, gays, masters, bosses, waiters, ladies, little sisters, children, etc. are commonly used. The general term for "big brother", "eldest sister", "uncle", "aunt" and other related titles can also be used to make it more friendly.

5. Greetings - be courteous and not awkward

Greetings are the opening remarks during a meeting and the prelude and foreshadowing of the conversation. Common ways of greeting are:

⑴ Greeting. Common polite words such as "Hello", "Good morning" and "Happy New Year"; caring greetings such as "Long time no see and I miss you so much", "Are you busy lately? How are you?".

⑵ Touching the scene creates emotions. Such as "Good evening! It's a good time to take a walk", "The weather is really nice today and the scenery here is beautiful". This type of speech is a common way of greeting in daily life.

⑶ Praise style. Words such as "I haven't seen you for many years, but your style is still the same", "Xiao Wang, your hairstyle is really beautiful" and other words will definitely make the other party happy.

⑷ Admiration type. Such as "I have admired your name for a long time", "I have read your masterpieces", "I am glad to see you" and so on.

There is no fixed pattern for greetings or polite words. They should be chosen according to the person, time and place. It is better to be sincere, cordial and natural.

Warm reminder

It is not advisable to rashly say phrases such as "how old is the child" or "how are you, my wife" to friends who have not been in touch for a long time, so as not to accidentally touch the other person's hidden pain and become embarrassed. You can use greetings such as "please say hello to my friends" and "please say hello to the whole family".

6. Elegant language - the expression of knowledge and accomplishment

Respect is the core connotation of etiquette, and when it is reflected in language, honorific language should be commonly used.

"Ling, Zun, Xian" is used to address each other's relatives respectfully. "Ling" is commonly used, "Zun" is used to refer to elders, and "Xian" is used to refer to peers and juniors, but "Zun" and "Xian" are both used when referring to each other's spouse. For example, "Your Majesty, Your Majesty, Your Son, Your Love"; "My dear brother, your dear sister, my dear nephew"; "Your dear wife, your dear wife", etc.

"Jia,she,xiao" is used to refer to one's relatives. "Jia" is used to refer to the elders and elders, such as parents, uncles, brothers and sisters-in-law. "She" is used to refer to people who are younger than oneself, such as brother (sister) and nephew. Children can be called son, daughter, or son-in-law.

Parents who have passed away can be called "father", "mother", "strict" or "kind".

In modern times, the word "gui" is still commonly used to address the other party, his unit, and company with respect, such as "your place", "your company", etc. Furthermore, when asking about age, for young people, you can ask "How much is your age?"; for older people, you can ask "How long will your life be?"

Warm reminder

First meeting - long time no see; long time no see - long time no see; asking for criticism - advice; asking for forgiveness - tolerance; trouble others - disturbing; asking for convenience ——To borrow light; to entrust someone to do something—please; to praise someone’s opinion—high opinion.

7. Telephone - You can know the person by hearing his voice

As an active actor, the caller should consider the feelings of the passive recipient.

⑴ Do not make unprepared calls. You must be in a good state of mind when making a phone call. It is best to stand or sit down, but do not lie down or lean on the sofa, as this will inevitably make a lazy sound, and you cannot talk on the phone while eating. Before picking up the receiver, you should know what to say after the call, your thoughts should be clear, and the key points should be clear.

⑵ Choose an appropriate call time. The principle is to try not to disturb the other person's schedule. Generally speaking, it is not advisable to make phone calls during meal times; before 7 a.m. (8 a.m. on holidays), after 10 p.m.; when the other party is leaving for work or when he is coming home from get off work, unless there are special circumstances of last resort. Avoid making phone calls in the middle of the night to avoid disturbing the other person and their family. You should also control the call time and try to keep your conversations short.

⑶ Pay attention to speaking politely. The volume should be moderate, subject to the other party’s ability to hear clearly. The speaking speed should be slightly slower and the tone should be calm to give the other party a sense of intimacy, but do not be pretentious or pretentious.

Generally speaking, after answering the phone, you should immediately give a brief greeting, introduce yourself and name the person you want to call. Do not say "Do you know who I am? Guess!" words.

Always use polite language when making phone calls. Commonly used ones include: "Hello", "Did I make myself clear?", "Thank you", "Goodbye", and "Good night"!

The courtesy of answering the phone reflects your own upbringing and the style of your family or unit. Pick up the microphone and first announce the name of your unit in polite terms. When answering the phone in the office, avoid being unobtrusive and affecting the work of others. If you are at home, say "Hello" when you answer the phone, and the other party can reply, and then introduce yourself if necessary.

If the other party wants to page Zhang San, the recipient should tell the other party enthusiastically, such as: "Okay, please wait a moment." Then cover the receiver with his hand, either to invite or directly hand the microphone to Zhang San. three. If Zhang San is not present, the recipient should politely say: "Do you need to tell me something?" or "Can you leave your phone number?" and avoid hanging up with "not there" or "didn't see it."

Keep paper and pen ready next to the phone so you can take down messages from the other party at any time. When receiving a wrong call, you should also say kindly: "I'm sorry, you made the wrong call."

When the phone conversation is over, you can ask the other party, which not only respects the other party but also reminds the other party, and finally ends with a polite word such as "goodbye".

You should also put down the microphone gently. If you click the receiver as soon as you finish speaking, your previous politeness may be wasted. Generally, the speaker or the caller is asked to put down his or her phone first.

8. Mobile phone - don’t forget to turn it on and off

Mobile phone etiquette not only has the essence of phone etiquette, but also has its own special norms. The basic characteristic of mobile phones is their mobility, which may bring noise to any place. Therefore, mobile phone users should pay special attention to others.

⑴ Turning on the phone is the foundation of the call. Under normal circumstances, the mobile phone should be turned on and carried with you so that you can answer the call in a timely manner and avoid making the other party wait anxiously, and do not let the mobile phone far away from the owner annoy others. If it is inconvenient to answer the call in a timely manner, as soon as you have the opportunity, respond promptly and explain the reason and apologize.

⑵ Never let it ring when it shouldn’t. On special occasions, such as driving, meeting, operating, lecturing, performing, negotiating, in theaters, hospitals, concert halls, libraries, airplanes, buses, hotel lobbies... you cannot talk on your cell phone indifferently!

⑶ Keep the story short and consider others. When making phone calls, special attention should be paid to speaking concisely to save call time. If the other person is on the road or doing errands or in a situation where it is not appropriate to talk too much, you should keep your words short.

Nowadays, mobile phones have more and more functions, but be careful: do not use it to send spam messages to your acquaintances, and do not use it to make vulgar jokes.

9. Letters - be polite and sincere when writing

There are many rules for letters, too numerous to mention. Here are some common deficiencies:

⑴ Envelopes. In order to be eye-catching and to show respect for the recipient, the recipient's name should fall in the middle of the envelope. You can write it larger and slightly to the left. Do not use the letter writer's relative title for the recipient or the recipient's administrative position, such as "aunt" or "director", because the envelope is mainly for the delivery personnel to see, and it is rude to the delivery personnel to write in this way.

For letters printed on a computer, the signature must be handwritten (signature) to show caution; it is best to also handwrite the title to show respect.

⑵ Letter paper. The letter paper must be standard and neat. If you use torn paper from workbooks or notebooks, or use palm-sized paper to write letters, I am afraid it will give people the impression of being stingy, right? The content formats such as title, greeting, body, conclusion, signature, year, month, day, etc. should pay more attention to standardization and etiquette.

⑶ When sending emails and text messages, don’t forget to sign your real name. Don’t let the other party waste time and effort guessing. Before sending a letter, you must consider whether it will cause resentment or misunderstanding to the recipient and family, especially advertising information. It is better to send less; obscene, violent, superstitious and other illegal contents must not be sent. Not only is it disrespectful, but it is also immoral and may even violate the law.

⑷ Greeting cards. As a special letter of congratulations, whether it is a paper greeting card or an electronic greeting card, you must pay attention to factors such as timing, object, and emotional characteristics. It is not appropriate to use ridiculing words to the elderly, and it is not appropriate to use affectionate words to ordinary friends of the opposite sex. It is best to create your own congratulatory words, which should be sincere and unique. Those congratulatory words that are simply copied and forwarded will inevitably lead to a common, stereotyped and perfunctory feeling.

10. When surfing the Internet - be cautious in your words and judge your character

Sincerity has a special meaning in Internet etiquette. The distinctive feature of online life is its virtuality, which enables communication without seeing the person, hearing the person's voice, knowing their real name, or seeing their handwriting. Therefore, being sincere to others can better reflect your personality in online life.

The online world gives you the greatest freedom of expression, but it does not mean that you can be unscrupulous and do whatever you want. You must still remember: don’t do to others what you don’t want others to do to you. You can't just vent for yourself, regardless of other people's feelings.

When chatting online, you should take into account the emotions of others and be as sincere, cordial and cautious as talking in person, without telling lies, lies or empty words.

Respect the privacy rights of others and do not ask any questions involving personal privacy to others. Respect the customs and habits of others and even other countries, and do not violate the taboos of others and nations.

Be good at reflecting your own upbringing. Online life should also pursue a high level, where you can share each other's professional knowledge, exchange information, and help each other with others. You must also be tolerant, forgive others' mistakes, and treat online interactions with a calm and rational attitude.