How to treat others gently?

When I was browsing Weibo some time ago, I suddenly saw a repost from a friend:

I suddenly felt deeply that when I was young, I always liked the cool and domineering style when watching idol dramas. He is a CEO-like figure, but as he grows older and more experienced, he discovers more and more that gentleness is the most beautiful quality.

After all, when people see the maliciousness of the world, they still prefer to be treated gently.

1. Friends with gentle personalities are the light of life

There is a question on Zhihu: Where does human gentleness come from?

The most voted answer is: Let’s have a fight and go out to buy groceries and come back.

It reminded me of my childhood.

Since I was a child, I have been a very stubborn person who is unwilling to admit defeat.

I remember one time on the way home from school, we had a disagreement over a trivial matter and a small A, so we all walked home angrily and ignored each other.

On the way home, I realized that the fault was actually mine, not hers. Although I felt sorry in my heart, I was stubborn and refused to bow my head, so I never said "I'm sorry" to her.

When I got home, I found Little A sitting on the stairs in front of my house, holding ice cream in both hands.

"You are so slow. I was afraid that something might happen to you on the road, so I waited for you in front of your house. I felt relieved when you came back. Here, I bought you ice cream."

< p>At that moment, I suddenly felt that she was extremely gentle, as if her whole body was shining with light.

Although he and Little A did not live in the same city as adults, they would often chat on WeChat.

Every time I chat with Xiao A, I am very happy. She can reply to my messages instantly, and I can chat with her until the end.

One time during a chat, I saw her posting on Moments: I’m really busy tonight...

I sent her a private message: She’s so busy, so there’s no need. I'll reply in seconds. Let's talk again when you are free.

She replied: OK, I'm afraid you will keep waiting for news from me.

There is a saying on Weibo that is very popular. People who respond instantly should be very gentle. They are not willing to keep you waiting for too long.

People who really care about you will always try to think about things from your perspective.

Such a gentle person is simply the light of life.

2. All kindness from the heart is tenderness

When I was in high school, my family went on a self-driving trip to Jiuzhaigou.

After dinner with my parents in the evening, I decided to go back to the hotel because it was cold in the mountains.

The hotel we stayed in was temporarily booked because it happened to be a holiday and there were many tourists, so we couldn't book a suitable hotel and only booked a hotel halfway up the mountain.

When it was late at night, I found that I was lost. I walked back and forth on a small hillside three times. The moon was dark that night and the wind was strong. I was shivering with cold in my short-sleeved shirt.

At this time, a tricycle appeared behind me. I instinctively dodged it. Later, I found that the tricycle had been following me. I suddenly felt a signal of danger.

When I was about to run away, a tricycle stopped next to me. A dirty middle-aged man said to me in Sichuan dialect: "Son, let me take you up. It's very cold in the mountains. Yes, you are still wearing short sleeves."

I was scared and couldn't believe it, so he took out his mobile phone, wiped it on his clothes and handed it to me: "Give me my mobile phone. Parents, please call me. Uncle is not a bad person."

After making the call, I reluctantly sat in the back of the car. The middle-aged man said, "Wear more clothes when you go into the mountains, just like my children. I don’t know whether it’s hot or cold, I’ll catch a cold later.”

I saw a lot of eggs and leeks in his car, and he was riding a tricycle wearing short sleeves that couldn’t be worn anymore.

In this world, there are some people you may only meet once in your life, but they give you their gentlest side. 3. Treating others gently is the highest level of emotional intelligence.

Tsai Kangyong, who is known for his high emotional intelligence, once told his story in a program.

When Cai Kangyong was a child, his mother took him to a rich friend's house to play mahjong. At meal time, the host brought out the family's treasured delicacies, abalone wings and ginseng tripe.

When Cai Kangyong ate shark fin for the first time, he was amazed: "Wow, it's so delicious. What is this!"

The host smiled and said softly: "This is a fan " He even served Kang Yong another bowl and said, "Eat more if you like it."

Cai Kangyong, who has become famous when he grows up, still encounters many dinner parties, and people who treat him often treat him in a big way. Promoting the preciousness of the ingredients also made him miss the host who had entertained him even more. When a sensitive child did not understand the preciousness of the ingredients, he did not deliberately show off, fearing that he would be stressed because of this.

True gentleness is the ability to take care of other people's emotions and quietly take a detour for you in your heart.

I watched "The Bizarre Conference" some time ago, and Liu Zichen, a live-spirited seductress who used plastic surgery, worshiping money, and weird remarks to attract countless blackmails, came to break through.

His deeds match the title of the show very well. He clearly admitted that he had plastic surgery and even fought with the plastic surgery hospital, but he denied the fact that he had plastic surgery on the show.

Ma Dong and Gao Xiaosong pointedly pointed out: "You are not popular at all, it is just a way to get ahead."

Only He Jiong said sincerely: "You are good-looking in person. "Many, the photo looks like a doll, why do you make your photo so exaggerated?"

This gentle sentence is not as direct as Ma Dong and Gao Xiaosong. It is not that Liu Zichen is regarded as a weirdo. Pity a lost child.

4. Gentleness is the best way to get along with the world

There are two types of gentle people. The first type is caused by the influence of the living environment, both in the family and in social circles. He is such a good person that the education he has received is the standard system for his conduct.

The second type is people who have never been treated gently by the world. Those who have been hurt or squeezed when they were weak, because they are extremely empathetic and do not want others to go through what they have experienced, they choose to treat others gently.

There is a healing anime "Natsume's Book of Friends" in Japan. The protagonist, Natsume, lost her parents when she was young. During her childhood, she was pushed around as a burden by her relatives, and lived in various relatives' homes.

Because he could see monsters at a young age, he was called an "abnormal" by everyone. He spent his childhood in panic and fear.

However, everything that hurt him did not make him give up his principles. He treated others gently and gained many friends.

You can't choose how the world treats you, but you have the right to choose how you treat the world.

There is a saying that goes well: The older you grow, the more you realize that doing things is not easy, and the more you understand that everyone has difficulties, the less you dare to look down on anyone casually, and the less afraid you are of accidentally hurting someone. This is not cover-up, nor hypocrisy, but understanding how to be considerate and gentle, and how to deal with the world gently.

Gentleness is a very powerful force. It is not without principles or bottom line, but a power of tolerance.

This is the most advanced emotional intelligence in the world.

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