"Do You Know" Changfeng's wife Liu: Life is like a journey against the odds, and you are the most reliable ferryman.

In the TV series "Do You Know", Mo Lan once mocked his brother Sheng Changfeng with contempt for having an "ugly wife" and also laughed at him for being "disturbed by the ugly wife until he lost all his heart and mind."

Due to the plot direction and space limitations, Chang Feng's "ugly daughter-in-law" was not explained in the play, and it was only briefly mentioned in these two sentences.

In fact, in the original work, Sheng Changfeng’s wife Liu is not simply “ugly daughter-in-law”. The relationship between her and Changfeng is also full of stories:

Mister Liu is obviously the legitimate daughter of a noble family, so why did she marry a bastard like Chang Feng?

Obviously Changfeng has always been self-respecting and focused on appearance, so why can he be so affectionate with an "ugly daughter-in-law"?

Although Liu’s experience is not the main plot of the original work, it can give people some inspiration:

Time is rolling like the sea, and life is like sailing against the current; when faced with the tricks of fate, instead of complaining about fate It is better to be your own ferryman than to wait for foreign aid.

Liu's marriage originally had nothing to do with the Sheng family. She is the legitimate daughter of a noble family with a century-old hairpin and a scholarly family. She was betrothed to the grandson of Jiang Gelao, an important minister of the imperial court, since she was a child.

That is a real match.

However, seeing the age of marriage, Ms. Liu encountered the first hurdle on the road to marriage and love: her fiancé actually acted willfully during the mourning period for his father, made a maid pregnant, and gave birth to a son. .

Liu's mother came to argue, but the Jiang family was hesitant and unable to give a clear explanation, and refused to leave the son behind.

Faced with such a lax family, the Liu family was disappointed and unwilling to continue the marriage;

However, the Liu family had reached the age of marriage and could not afford to be slow and careful again. Selected;

After all, in those days, "older spinster" was really not a glorious label, even if the Liu family was well-educated and sensible, and even if the Liu family had hairpins for generations.

As a result, the Liu family's attention fell on Sheng Changfeng, the concubine of their colleague and friend Sheng Hong.

It stands to reason that as the legitimate daughter of the Liu family, Chang Feng is beyond the reach of anyone who wants to marry him; but due to the episode of "repented marriage", the gap between the two people was miraculously "smoothed away" ”:

The Liu family thought that the Sheng family was a scholar, with a clean family background, and that Chang Feng was talented and elegant;

The Sheng family thought that the Liu family was dignified, sensible, and capable of running a household. ; I fancy that the Liu family is strong and can help Changfeng's future.

The elders of the two families hit it off immediately, and no one asked Chang Feng for his opinion. Chang Feng is actually very unhappy:

Because Chang Feng has always been a Jia Baoyu-type character, accustomed to judging people by their appearance;

And the fact that Liu is not beautiful has long been a problem. Because of the banquets between the two families and the loud-mouthed broadcasts of the fifth girl, it became a tacit secret among everyone.

As a result, Ms. Liu, who had just overcome the hurdle of "repenting of the marriage", immediately faced the second hurdle: her new fiancé disliked her appearance.

But she didn’t know that a third obstacle would appear immediately after marriage: the future mother-in-law, the Queen, was preparing to set rules for her.

What should come will eventually come.

From the second day after their wedding, Mrs. Wang became impatient and launched an attack. She sent her new daughter-in-law Liu around as she pleased, and ordered her to stand in line:

After a while, she was told to stand in the cold wind. At one moment, he was asked to kneel in the courtyard, at another moment, he was asked to stand at the door with a water basin to wait on him, and at the next moment, he was deducted from the food and clothing expenses in Liu's courtyard;

All kinds of tricks, Hua Lan, the eldest daughter of the Sheng family, saw that I felt bad for this new sibling, and secretly felt that my mother had gone too far.

In fact, when her legitimate son Changbai’s daughter-in-law Hei Shi married, Mrs. Wang also planned to punish Hei Shi in this way. Unexpectedly, Chang Bai felt sorry for his daughter-in-law and secretly gave Hei Shi ideas to help Hei Shi escape quickly.

In contrast, Ms. Liu had no support from her husband, not even a word or two of comfort;

To make matters worse, her husband Chang Feng was newlywed. On the fifth day, I went to find the girl who was married to my first wife. I had neither the tenderness of a newlywed nor the face and feelings of the bride.

It’s a bit sad to think about it:

If she’s not pretty enough, that’s because she’s born with it, and she has no choice;

If she misses the best age for marriage, then It was delayed by her ex-fiancé, and the responsibility does not lie with her;

Marrying Changfeng was decided by her parents and elders, not her idea;

From beginning to end, she was well-informed and sensible She had never done anything wrong, but she had to endure the neglect from her husband and the bullying from her mother-in-law.

The more difficult it is, the more you can see a person's pattern and ability.

It is not impossible if Mrs. Liu runs back to her parents’ home to complain and recruit reinforcements. After all, Sheng Hong promised the Liu family that he would treat his daughter-in-law well, and his words still ring in his ears;

But if this happens, It will more or less affect the friendship between the two families, and will definitely make the gap between the young couple deeper and deeper.

Mr. Liu chose to solve all the problems alone; note that it means "solve", not "suffer".

On the one hand, she sees that her husband Chang Feng is not bad in nature, but he is weak-tempered and lacks a backbone in his work; therefore, what she has to do is to become Chang Feng's psychological "reliance".

So she played hard to get and played a tacit double act with Sheng Hong and Mrs. Sheng:

The elders made a fool of themselves by using the words "homework" and "house rules". In this name, he continued to teach Chang Feng for many days, making the weak-minded Chang Feng feel besieged on all sides, miserable and panicked, with no close friend between heaven and earth; One sad and sad night, she took the initiative to look for him in the study with a late-night snack. With gentle and intimate words, she made Chang Feng cry like a child in her arms. Later, she personally came forward to help him. He brought back the girl from the first house who had been driven into the village.

Changfeng felt the long-lost love and warmth, and since then regarded Liu as his backbone, and the two of them were "as good as honey."

On the other hand, she knew that her father-in-law Sheng Hong was a person who valued reputation and could not always tolerate her mother-in-law, Mrs. Wang, bullying her (otherwise he would not have the face to see Liu’s father in the future), so what she had to do was to let the facts Forcing the father-in-law to take action.

Therefore, she did not say anything to all the difficulties Mrs. Wang made, and she complied with them one by one, maintaining the image of a filial daughter-in-law.

And the facts were as she expected. Sheng Hong really couldn't stand Mrs. Wang's endless tossing and couldn't help but reprimanded her. Not only did she exempt Liu from "setting the rules", but she also gave Liu The relatively independent economic power in the family courtyard is to avoid being deducted from money by Mrs. Wang again.

With her precise vision of people and her accurate prediction of the direction of things, Mrs. Liu used her temporary tolerance of grievances to gain victory in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law without a fight, and she also won a victory for herself. The reputation of a good wife.

However, marriage is not as simple as love; in addition to the love of a man and a concubine, there are also various practical problems lying in front of him, each and every one of which cannot be avoided.

Although Mrs. Liu has eased the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law and captured her husband's heart, it does not mean that she can sit back and relax:

First of all, her husband Changfeng is just a concubine, and at present he is just a bastard. His elder brother, Sheng Changbai, has outstanding abilities and is a direct descendant. When the family is divided in the future, Changfeng will definitely not be able to compare with Changbai.

Secondly, although Chang Feng's relationship with her has improved, Jiang Shan's nature is easy to change and he is still a passionate seed. He spoils the maids in the room "all like noble concubines", and there are even beautiful maids. Trying to use pregnancy to win favor.

This situation is actually very similar to the situation of the fourth girl Mo Lan after her marriage:

Her husband is playful and ignorant, his abilities are not as good as those of his brothers, but he is the most passionate, and there are still Doting on my concubine Chun Ge.

The method Mo Lan adopted was to pretend to be virtuous and find more beautiful concubines and maids for her husband to share his favor with. Although she successfully defeated her love rival Chun Ge, it also made her husband less motivated to make progress and made her mother-in-law even more disgusted. ;

But Mrs. Liu saw it clearly:

First, don’t try to compete with Changbai for family property. He is really capable, so you can’t accept it;

Secondly, if you want to live a prosperous life in the future, relying only on the property obtained by dividing the family is not a long-term solution. Changfeng will be most reliable if he has fame and ability;

Thirdly, the little tricks of the concubines , must be treated, but it is not your first priority.

Therefore, Mrs. Liu did not spend her energy jealous of Changbai and sow brotherhood, nor did she dive into the competition between wives and concubines. Instead, she grasped the key point of the problem-seriously and firmly urged Changfeng to study. Make progress and gain fame.

Later facts proved that this trick was indeed brilliant:

First, Chang Feng finally passed the exam, gained fame, and later became a well-known figure in the capital; Even if the family is separated in the future, they will still have enough ability to support the small family;

Secondly, Mrs. Liu further gained the recognition of Sheng Hong and Mrs. Sheng, who not only came forward for her to quell a few delusional people. The maid also warned Chang Feng that he must "have a legitimate son first" and not to mess around;

Thirdly, when Chang Feng was punished for doting on the maid, Liu once again put on a sweet face and pleaded for him. Feng's eyes are not only not jealous, but also very reasonable, and the relationship between the couple is a little closer.

Since then, the Liu family's position in the Sheng family has become more and more stable, and the future can finally see the light.

Mrs. Liu's life is actually a bit sympathetic and compassionate:

She was originally destined to marry the legitimate son of a high family, but because of the character of her first fiancé, Problems delayed her youth, causing her to have to marry a concubine hastily;

Her current husband is like a naive child. From the relationship between husband and wife to the future of fame, she worries about everything; < /p>

The valuable thing about her is that no matter how many troubles she has, her mind is always clear:

Therefore, instead of escaping from reality, placing hope in others, and placing hope in the unpredictable In the future, it is better to regard the current life as your own battlefield, do something seriously, and fight for yourself with your own hands.

As the saying goes, if an egg is broken from the outside, it can only become food; if an egg is broken from the inside, it is reborn.

She does not fight with her ignorant mother-in-law, but takes advantage of the opportunity to gain reputation and popularity;

She does not fight with the girl in the same room, but uses the power of her elders to stabilize her position , establish her image as a wise and progressive wife;

She does not compete with her brother and sister-in-law, but focuses on her husband's ability and future, accumulating longer-term and more reliable capital.

Relying on his own structure and wisdom, Liu's life finally opened up a new situation.

Some people may say that times are different now. If your marriage is not satisfactory, you don’t necessarily have to go out of your way to help a man like Liu. Wouldn’t it be nice to work on your own career?

It is true that today is different from the past, and we do not need to apply 100% of Liu's methods today; but we have to admit that at least a few points in Liu's story are Worth pondering:

First, if a woman has to marry "lowly", then she can accept the "lowness" of her husband's financial resources, but she cannot accept the "lowness" of her husband's family style, character, and moral character. ";

If the Sheng family's family tradition is not good, then no matter how good-hearted the Liu family is, they will not be recognized by their elders, and it will be even more difficult to promote Chang Feng's progress;

Chapter 1 Second, in life, you will inevitably suffer grievances. The key depends on whether the grievance is worth it; if it can bring benefits and give up, then the grievance will not be in vain.

Third, have a bigger picture, take a longer view, and look further ahead for three to five years when encountering problems. Don’t be easily trapped by the troubles in front of you.

Life is not easy, and all living beings suffer; in the end, you still have to learn to enlighten yourself and achieve yourself.