What can't you try in life?

After getting the license with my wife, I originally planned to get married at the end of the year. It's a good buddy's birthday, and he's going to a bar after dinner. I said, "Go ahead, I have work to do." They are a little different. They said you had something to do at night. I said I was getting married soon, and I didn't want to go to the bar again. In the future, I should put my family and wife first. If my brothers didn't eat or drink, I would definitely attend. I will not go to a place like KTV.

As soon as my voice fell, a buddy laughed at me and said, "Lao Xu, when did you become so filial?" You put your wife first, but your wife doesn't necessarily put you first. Isn't there a saying that couples divorce after a hundred days? " I said, "My wife and I have had a good relationship for more than eight years. It's not a joke." He said, "Why don't we give it a try? I was a little unhappy, so I said, "Go play, I'll go first. "They stopped me from letting me go and said,' It's all buddies, don't be upset. Today is Xiao Wei's birthday. He will play for a while and then go home. "I was forced to go to the bar for a night.

When I came home the next day, my wife actually knew that I had gone to the bar, made a scene with me and said that I was getting married and went to the bar. I didn't reassure her at all. I haven't stopped all morning. I'm so bored that I can't say it. After all, it's true that I went to the bar behind her back.

When I was upset, I had the idea of testing her and asked my friends to help me find a way to test her. A friend found a friend we didn't know, tall and handsome, and rented a sports car. I cooperated with them to provide my wife's itinerary. After his wife finished her hair, the handsome boy asked his wife for directions, and the destination was where her wife was going. The handsome boy asked my wife to go by car, and my wife hesitated and agreed. In the car, the handsome boy began to show off his wealth and background to my wife, saying that he came back from studying in a famous American school. The year before last, he started a startup company in partnership with a friend. The current annual income is 20 million. This time he came to talk about this project with a friend. He left my wife's contact information when he left.

The next day, the handsome guy called my wife and asked her to have tea. My wife agreed behind my back. On the date, the handsome guy gave my wife a bag worth more than 50,000 yuan (borrowed from a friend) and told her that she liked it the first time she saw it. He believed that they could meet in the vast sea of people. This is God's destiny, and God can't break it. He asked my wife to be his girlfriend, and then he told my wife something about his travel around the world. My wife is so obsessed that she never mentioned that she was meeting someone, let alone getting a license.

After lunch, the man asked her to go home, and she actually agreed. I thought that even if she liked this handsome guy again, it would be impossible for her to agree to go home with him so soon. I completely collapsed and went to their car and said, "I have loved you for eight years, and it is not enough for him to see you twice." You are so disappointing. " She understood, got off the bus and said, "Are you testing me on purpose? If you don't believe me, why did you marry me?

The next day, we went to the Civil Affairs Bureau for divorce, and we divorced before we got married. We have been in love for eight years, experienced joys and faced difficulties together. In less than two days, it was all over. I regret testing her, probably because she still has love and reluctance in her heart. What I regret most is that she refused to give me back more than 50 thousand bags, and I spent more than 50 thousand to compensate others for a new one. My wife and money are gone. This damn test.

I don't think children's learning and education can be tried. We must deal with this matter in a down-to-earth and smart way. If you are not careful, you will ruin your child's bright future and future. If children have no future, you will lose a cornucopia! Education comes first in life.

Many things can't be tried and human nature can't stand the test. If you try, something will happen.

I am a friend of the opposite sex who has played for more than ten years and grew up together. One day, I said to her: It's not good to be my girlfriend, and I want to try her reaction. I didn't expect her to agree directly. She said yes. I regard you as my brother and you want to be my girlfriend.

That night, we went to Luchuan together and drank some wine. In the evening, I sent her home. On the way, I said: My home is close, why not go directly to my home? My parents are not at home anyway. Sure, she said.

Can girls be reserved? I just want to see if you are a lady.

The next day, before we got up, my mother came back. My mother gave a wry smile when she saw us. To hide my embarrassment, I said to my mother, This is your future daughter-in-law.

As a result, she was still sleeping and suddenly said something in her sleep. Yes, when I saw her, her eyes were closed and she was breathing smoothly. Fortunately, I was talking in my sleep, so I got up and forced my marriage.

After getting married, I said to save face: Let's travel to Turkey. Let's go Can't you see I'm testing you? I don't know how to save some money for my husband.

On the way back, I saw two very cute babies. I can't help boasting: so cute! I really want to be a father.

Birth and death. It almost killed me. At that time, I used to drink fast food line as water.

After giving birth to one, I said: A baby is so lonely. She said, another drink. Then I walked completely on the wall, breathing every three steps.

Once, I wanted to test whether my daughter-in-law was a vain and rich person. I said to her, let's move to a bigger house and go to town.

Let's go Then we sold the old house and borrowed 6.5438+0.8 million from the bank.

I said: a car with tens of thousands of dollars is not easy to drive, and my daughter-in-law should change to a better one. Then she dragged me to the 4S shop. Later, we borrowed hundreds of thousands from the bank.

We have been married 10 years. That year, I wanted to test whether my daughter-in-law loved me or not, even though I knew she must love me. I said: Daughter-in-law, let's get a divorce. I don't think there is any affection between us.

This time, she finally made a long speech with me, specifically pointing out where we are not suitable and the benefits of divorce to each other. She made it clear that I was moved to tears. After being with me for so many years, I wronged my wife.

Now I leave home clean, with more than 2 million foreign debts, and I am alone.

Innocent blue (difficult).

Therefore, some things can't be tried, or you will die.

Here I tell a true story, but the ending of this story is too tragic, which eventually led to his wife's suicide and his own illness, not to mention the bleak old age.

In the early 1990s, reform and opening-up went deep into the vast rural areas. People who are used to planned economy are no longer willing to live in poverty. People go to work and do business to develop the economy. There is a man named Liang in our village. He is an honest farmer and has worked all his life. He is so stupid that he doesn't want to do anything but farm.

Lao Liang's wife is not alone with him. She has a flexible mind and can keep pace with the times. Seeing that people are all in business, she thought of a way to wholesale clothes in the wholesale market in the county and sell them in the market. Because she has a glib tongue, looks beautiful and does a good job in business.

In the traditional backward countryside, once a woman has the ability, it will attract criticism. Some people say that Lao Liang's wife fell in love with a wholesaler in the south and saw a man send her clothes. Some people even say that men will not leave for a long time.

Lao Liang is busy in the field all day and doesn't know anything about his wife. The person who loves to send messages tells his wife that she is having an affair and tells him to be careful.

Although Lao Liang is stupid and incompetent, he is a very suspicious person. He suspected that his wife might really fall in love with a southerner, so he began to stop it. Whenever a southerner comes to deliver the goods, he runs home to see if his wife has done anything shameful with that person.

I was blocked several times in a row and didn't find out what my wife was doing. I only found them counting and sorting clothes. Lao Liang still won't give up in his heart. In order to completely sever the relationship between his wife and southerners, he once ran home with a shovel and hacked southerners to death. As a result, southerners were driven away and never saw southerners again.

When the southerners didn't come, Lao Liang was relieved, but his wife had no clothes to sell. It turns out that southerners always supply her at the lowest price. As a result, southerners got angry and stopped supplying, so they went to other places to buy goods. It was too expensive, looked unfashionable and didn't make money at all.

My wife suddenly lost her business, so she couldn't make any money. There was no place to make a fire in my heart, so I drank pesticides in a fit of pique and died before I got to the hospital.

Lao Liang saw that he had caused a big disaster and felt that he could not live in this life. He jumped into the big well in the village and tried to drown himself. It was a winter and he stayed in the water for a long time. When people found an iron hook to hook him up from the well, they thought he was dead. After a while, he came back to life, but his body left the root of the disease and he was sore all the year round. His only daughter also left him, dropped out of school to work and never came back.

The story of Lao Liang proves a truth. The trust between husband and wife should not be doubted, let alone tried. Once you try, it will bring a crisis of trust. At that time, my wife committed suicide because of traditional conservatism, and now she is divorced.

Contributed by: Dong Qingdao.

People's feelings can't be tried. If you try, you must be playing with fire. If they try, there will be a first time, a second time and a third time, until they are burned to ashes by surging emotions.

One year, I did kitchen shopping in a big hotel for half a year. At that time, the boss said it was temporary A few days after I found the right person, I went back to cooking as a chef. In my half-year shopping, I met a very spoony girl, about 30 years old, who has reached the point of madness.

In the last time, whenever she is free, she follows me everywhere. This girl is quiet and quiet. She is often not afraid of people waiting for me outside the security room of the hotel. Whenever I go out, she is like a tail that I can't get rid of.

Usually, she won't have breakfast or dinner before I arrive. When she pays the bill, she always pays for dinner and pays the bill in advance. Actually, she has a husband, and her family runs a food stall. She also buys, but I get paid for my boss's service, and she serves her own family. The system belongs to her and her husband.

Although she doesn't like words and jokes, she is a bit reticent. But my eyes are full of affection for me. In the eyes of the abyss, love is buried there and often winks at me.

Just make an ordinary friend. If we cross this line of defense, it will be bad for both sides and harmful to both families. How did you know? It turned out that she couldn't help herself and was deeply attracted by the man's appearance.

Until 8 o'clock one night, her husband followed her for several days. When he saw her outside my hotel, he greeted her and asked her, "Who are you waiting for here?" Who is he? What does it matter? "I just woke up from a rude awakening. It turned out that she came to me behind her husband's back. At that time, her husband came with four people, as if preparing for war. He is aggressive and annoying. When he saw that her husband had brought so many people, I was dumbfounded and my legs trembled involuntarily. I'm very scared. Although I am a man with a height of1.80m and a weight of 90kg, it is not worth paying the price of blood for this uncivilized love.

If you don't know the depth, try her friendship and love, there will definitely be peach rectification, peach news and peach events, and the family of teenagers will break up and the family will not exist. Big ones kept fighting, blood spattered embroidered pillows, bodies were thrown on the street, and there were endless meals in prison. Why have sex for a while? I really appreciate my calm at that time, not trapped by feelings, not moved by feelings.

What can't I try? My opinion is not true love, but you can't try wild feelings. A woman who can't control herself should not try, no matter how beautiful she looks, even if she actively contributes herself.

In life and career, there are many things that must be tried, otherwise there will be no breakthrough and innovation. But what can be tried and what can't be tried must have principles.

First, wallach effect: commercial advantage, "trying" depends on everyone's own advantages and disadvantages. Is it to make up for shortcomings or commercial advantages?

On this issue, Confucius advocated commercial advantages, not disadvantages. Confucius said, "Confucius said, if you don't get angry, you won't get angry." If you don't turn around for three times, it won't be there. Confucius also said, "People above middle age can speak, but people below middle age can't speak. "("The Analects of Confucius Yongye ")

In Confucius' view, teach students not to enlighten them until they are confused by their own thoughts; Don't inspire him until he wants to say it but can't say it. Point out one aspect to him, and if he can't infer the other three aspects from it, he won't be taught any more.

Confucius also believed that people above average can teach him profound knowledge; And people below average can't give him profound knowledge.

It can be seen that Confucius' teaching methods emphasize teaching students in accordance with their aptitude and arouse students' positive thinking ability. In other words, we should pay attention to people's specialties, teach in specialties, and accumulate in specialties.

The "wallach Effect" is named after German chemist and Nobel Prize winner otto wallach, and its content comes from the legendary growth experience of wallach.

When wallach was in middle school, his parents wanted him to be a writer. Unexpectedly, after a semester, the teacher wrote him such a comment: "wallach studied hard, but his thinking was rigid and his literary creativity was extremely weak."

Later, wallach switched to oil painting, but he had no artistic talent, and he also lacked understanding of basic skills such as composition and color matching. The comment given by the school is even more unacceptable: "You have no room for creation in the art of painting."

In this regard, his parents feel a little desperate. Fortunately, his chemistry teacher thinks that he is meticulous in his work and has the proper character to do chemical experiments well. He was suggested to study chemistry. Unexpectedly, in the field of chemistry, his intellectual spark was suddenly ignited. At the age of 22, he received his doctorate and finally won the Nobel Prize in chemistry.

Kōnosuke Matsushita, the Japanese god of management, once said: "The secret of success in life lies in managing your own personal strengths, which can add value to your life, otherwise, it will devalue your life."

Whether we admit it or not, there is such a thing as "talent" in this world, what's more, because of the different growth environment, everyone's advantages and good direction are bound to be very different.

The "wallach effect" tells us that we should concentrate our limited time and energy on our best fields, so as to obtain the highest input-output ratio. Try your own advantages, which is called getting twice the result with half the effort, fostering strengths and avoiding weaknesses.

Second, Konikin's Law: Make up the shortcomings and "try" to make up the shortcomings with double efforts. Confucius advocated becoming a knowledgeable person.

Confucius said: "A gentleman is not a tool" (The Analects of Confucius is a government). It means that a gentleman can't be like a vessel with only one purpose, limited capacity and specified attributes.

On the supplement board, Confucius advocated trying to be a generalist and knowledgeable. Zhu was the most learned all-rounder in the Southern Song Dynasty and what Confucius called an "incompetent" gentleman. But people have to do this, not on a cold day.

Kannikin's law was first put forward by Lawrence Peter, an American management scientist. It's about how much water a bucket can hold, not depending on the longest board, but on the shortest template. Therefore, "Konikin's Law" is also called "short board effect".

"Kannikin's Law" is a management theory, which is used in organizational management. The key point is that no link in an organization can be short.

Everyone's intellectual development is unbalanced, and intelligence has both weaknesses and strengths. Therefore, in our own shortcomings, in areas where we are not good at, it is best not to try, which will consume a lot of energy and cost too much. This is called getting twice the result with half the effort, and it is not worth the loss.

Mr. Hu Shi once said: "For example, if a talented person does not study poetry in the Chinese Department but wants to study surgery in the medical school, then there will be one less first-class poet in the College of Liberal Arts and one more third-rate or even fifth-rate surgeon in the medical field. This is a loss for the country and for himself."

Lu Xun can foster strengths and avoid weaknesses, and make a gorgeous turn. Lu Xun studied in Nanjing Kuangshan Road School when he was in middle school. Later, he went to Japan to study. At first, he still retained his interest in mining. However, in 1904, 24-year-old Lu Xun "abandoned mines to study medicine" and transferred to Sendai Medical College in Japan to study medicine. After studying for less than two years, 1906 automatically dropped out of school and "abandoned medical literature".

Lu Xun did not make up for his own shortcomings, but fought with a pen all his life, giving full play to his specialty of "hard fighting", and being able to "transform and heal the national character" and save the Chinese spirit.

Only in this way can he stand on his own feet, go his own way, enjoy himself, adhere to free thinking and independent personality, and become an example of cultural people forever in the ruthless fascist cultural "encirclement and suppression".

Third, Matthew effect: Excellence comes from repeated attempts. I think the stronger the strong, the weaker the weak.

Chapter 77 of the Tao Te Ching says, "Is the Tao of Heaven still a bow? The highest person suppresses it, and the lower person lifts it; Surplus is loss, and deficiency is supplement. Heaven, the damage is more than enough. People's ways are different and the damage is insufficient. "

In Lao Tzu's view, isn't the Tao practiced by God just to shoot an arrow with a bow? If you raise it, lower it, if you lower it, raise it. If the bowstring collapses too tightly, it will be loose, and if it is not tight enough, it will be tight. What heaven has done is to reduce more than enough and make up for less. However, the way of practice in the world is not like this. It deprives the deficient and gives the surplus.

"Matthew effect" refers to the phenomenon that the stronger the strong, the weaker the weak. It was first put forward by Robert Morton, an American researcher in the history of science, in 1968. At that time, he tried to describe a strange phenomenon in the history of science-the more famous a scientist is, the easier it is to gain a higher reputation. Later, people used it to describe the polarization in various fields and the state that the strong take all.

"Matthew effect" is a fable in the Bible, New Testament and Matthew Gospel: once upon a time, there was a king who wanted to go out for a long trip. Before leaving, he gave each of the three servants a piece of silver, and said, "Do business, and come to me when I come back."

When the king came back, the first servant said, "master, you gave me a silver ingot, and I have earned ten ingots." So the king rewarded him with ten cities.

The second servant reported, "Master, you gave me a silver ingot, and I have earned five ingots." So the king rewarded him with five cities.

The third servant reported, "Master, the silver ingot you gave me has been wrapped in a handkerchief. I never took it out, for fear of losing it." So the king gave the silver ingot saved by the third servant to the first servant, saying, "What is missing, even what he has, must be taken away;" If you have a lot of things, you should give them to him. It's called the more the better. "This is the origin of Matthew effect.

There is an English proverb that says, "Successful reproduction is successful." Or: "Success is the mother of success." Judging from the probability, most successful people are "from success to success".

Failure can really temper people's will, sober them up and inspire them to fight harder. But "Matthew effect" is the most ruthless rule in this society, and it will not be lenient because of the perseverance of losers, because relatively few people come out of failure after all.

The biggest advantage of Matthew effect is the accumulation of resources. Resources can attract resources, which is what people often say, Qian Shengqian. At the same time, "Matthew effect" can promote strong self-confidence, and the chances of success are of course great. This is a virtuous circle. Failure leads to inferiority and failure, which is a vicious circle.

Dialectically, however, the "Matthew effect" has a negative side for both winners and losers:

With the same efforts, winners are more likely to succeed than losers. Some winners must not be awake and mistake the success brought by the "Matthew effect" for the result of their own efforts. For losers, "Matthew effect" can make them become the focus of public opinion prematurely and cannot extricate themselves from the whirlpool of competition.

The most important thing for a good actor is that he can challenge all kinds of roles. Someone once commented on Tony Leung Ka Fai, the winner of Hong Kong's new generation Golden Horse Award, saying that all the roles he played had distinct and unique temperament, which was a collection of multi-cultures, multi-regions and multi-types. Whether he plays a mainland poet, a Taiwan Province politician or a French lover, he is as real as Tony Leung Ka Fai himself, and he can play all kinds of roles with ease.

Life is like a play. On the stage of life, only by getting up the courage to try and let yourself freely change in various roles can you give full play to your creativity in life.

In Harvard University, the adjustment of departments between majors is nothing new, because Harvard has always advocated the spirit of freedom, so that every student can realize all his advantages and disadvantages as much as possible. It encourages students to learn to foster strengths and avoid weaknesses and specialize in what they are best at.

It is said that Mozart and Goethe encouraged each other to give it a try at a concert. Both of them found their own "notes" in this attempt: one is a great musician and the other is a great poet.

In short, feet are shorter and inches are longer. As long as we know what our strengths are and what our weaknesses are, and dare to give up our weaknesses and turn your life, work and career development into strengths and give full play to them, it will be easy to succeed. There are too many things in life that you can't try, especially addictive. 16 the day before, a little boy less than four years old cried and told his grandmother that he had a stomachache. At that time, the children's parents went to work, grandpa was in poor health, grandma quickly called the children's mother, and the children's mother took time off to go home.

When the mother saw that the child was in pain, she shed tears and took him to the community hospital for examination and treatment. After arriving at the hospital, I did B-ultrasound and some simple tests, and found nothing wrong. At this time, the child's stomach stopped hurting. On the way home, his mother bought him some food and toys and took him for a walk in the zoo. I think it is best not to get sick, so I am not at ease.

Who knows that a few days later, the child began to have a stomachache again. This time, the child cried with pain. Of course, grandma called her mother back again. Because I couldn't find the cause of stomachache in the community health center last time, my grandparents suggested going to the city hospital. As a result, the father of the child got the news and came back from work. The couple took the child to the city hospital.

Unexpectedly, no problems were found in the city hospital this time. The doctor explained some matters that should be paid attention to in life, telling them what children should eat, what they should not eat and what they should eat less. They took their children home again. This time, I also alerted the children's grandparents to come home to see the children.

At that time, it happened to catch up with the national family planning policy. The child's parents are the only children of the elderly, and now the child is also the only child. Four old people, two adults and six people only have this child, which is naturally a doting on the child. Grandma bought a lot of food and toys for her children that he likes to eat.

Just one day after the incident, the child cried and had a stomachache. This really scared the whole family. What if something happens to the child? Going to a children's specialist hospital is the result of family discussion.

I did a series of tests in the hospital, but there was no result in the end. However, children's stomachaches are becoming more and more frequent, and parents have to quit their jobs and embark on the road of seeking medical treatment for their children.

In more than three years, I visited provincial hospitals, Shanghai, Hangzhou, Beijing and other major hospitals. Spent all the savings at home, sold the house and failed to cure the child's stomachache, and the reason was not found out. The children's grandparents, grandparents and parents also don't know how many tears they shed.

Finally, the whole family lost hope, but a child psychologist learned this. He observed and communicated with the children for several days, and he came to the conclusion that the stomachache was faked by the children, and he was not sick at all! Faced with such a conclusion, people can't believe it at first, but the fact is the fact after all.

The first time a child had a stomachache, he thought, he saw a child of the same age with a stomachache on TV and was loved by his family.

If you have a stomachache, will your family love you? So I started my first attempt, and the result was really the same as I thought. After he tasted the sweetness, he could no longer control himself. Repeated "stomach pains" have ruined his parents and made them want to cry!

Be cautious about investing, shopping and making friends ... still working hard! There is nothing wrong with trying. Once you are addicted, you will lose more than you gain! The last thing you can try in life is the human heart. What you can't try in life is the gathering and dinner of COVID-19 epidemic. What life can't try is to challenge authority and the bottom line. What life can't try is danger. What you can't try in life is love, affection and friendship.

What can't you try in life? In our life, we must have awe and gratitude, abide by the basic principles of being a man and not violate heaven. There are many things you can't try, and one attempt will ruin your life.

First, you can't try anything that goes against morality and law. If you try, you will ruin your life.

Second, you can't try anything that harms others and benefits yourself. If you hurt others, you will hurt yourself. No pains, no gains. Don't think that you are very powerful and can do whatever you want. When you are down and out, you will go back to heaven to cause and effect, and eventually you will come to your side.

Third, respecting the old and loving the young can't be tried, and filial piety can't be done. It is everyone's responsibility to cultivate children. Don't feel unfilial and respect for the elderly when you are under great pressure. You can't wait until you have money to try. If you have no money, you won't let your children study. Anyway, you can be a big boss and make a lot of money without studying. If you don't respect the old and love the young, you will feel uneasy and regret life.

Four, bite the hand that feeds you, ingratitude, dare not try things that alienate you, fight rice for revenge, eat a bowl of rice, cut tofu with beans to please both sides, pretend to be good people inside and outside, don't know how to be grateful, others can't satisfy him, so they take the opportunity to add fuel to the fire, hit the benefactor, and one day they will get retribution.

Fifth, the relationship between husband and wife can not be tried, and there are countless cases in which fake divorce becomes real divorce.

6. You can't try to destroy nature. The SARS in 2007 and the new coronary heart disease this year were all caused by greedy people who ate wild animals out of curiosity and tried them, which caused disasters to mankind. Therefore, each of us should love nature and live in harmony with it.

Seven, human life can't be tried. I want to go to the underworld and tell you everything later. Once I go, I will never come back!

To sum up, everyone must not try in life! There is still a lot to try. ...

There are many things in life that you can't try. I think there are mainly the following points: first, you can't try illegal things; Second, you can't try life-threatening things, such as drinking poison and committing suicide; Third, you can't try to run a red light; Fourth, the wine rack can't be tried.