What are the customs and rituals for Hakka people in Meixian to get married?

Matchmaking

In the past, young Hakka men and women could ask a matchmaker to arrange marriages after they turned sixteen. Usually, the parents of the man's family ask a matchmaker to go to the girl's family to talk. There are also cases where the girl's family asks a matchmaker to visit the boy's family first.

Looking at the girl

The male and female families negotiate through the central media. If both parties are interested, they will agree on a time to "see the girl."

Writing Geng Tie

After both parties agree, they must tell each other their birth dates and horoscopes. After returning home, each of them asked a fortune teller to "calculate their horoscopes". If the eight characters match each other and will not conflict with each other, write out Geng Tie (common name for marriage list) and place them on the incense table. If there are no ominous signs within three days, the marriage will be decided. (If the eight characters do not match, the husband will The female Geng Tie is returned to the female family).

Making a red wedding invitation

It is also called "a red wedding invitation" or a wedding invitation. The man's parents, clan relatives and matchmaker go to the woman's family together and issue the financial gifts that the man wants to give to the woman's family. Some of the red slips also include gifts for the son-in-law, such as hats, silver flowers, clothes, shoes, socks, etc. During the process of opening a red order, both parties will bargain and finally negotiate and finalize. After the red orders are drawn, the men and women also exchange tokens such as rings, handkerchiefs, etc. Finally, the man came back after lunch at the woman’s house.

Engagement

It is also called "Dazha", which means to formally confirm the marriage again. The young man and his parents will go to the girl's house and bring pig heads, fish, meat, etc. The girl's parents, brothers-in-law, uncles, grandparents, etc. will all be present. After lunch, the girls come out to meet each other and call the boy's parents parents, and the parents of the two families call each other their in-laws and in-laws' mother.

Looking after the house

That is, the woman goes to the man’s house to see the family. Some of the time is before the “big wedding”, and some is after the “big wedding”. The child, his parents, relatives, sisters-in-law, sisters, etc. are all going. There are more than a dozen people, big and small. They don't bring any gifts, even if they bring some, the groom's family doesn't dare to accept them.

Send-off date

After the wedding is decided, the man will ask a fortune teller to choose a date for the wedding, including the day and time when the bride will go out, and the time when the bride will return to the groom’s house. In addition, the woman will The day when the red coat is cut and the man makes the bed should also be chosen at the same time.

Sending vegetables and carrying dowry

One or two days before the bride comes to the door, the groom’s family will ask the family members to bring the betrothal gift specified in the red list and fish, meat, poultry, noodles and other items. More than ten people were sent to the bride's house, and when they came back, they took the dowry, furniture, etc. back to the groom's house.

Welcoming a bride

It is also called receiving a bride or passing through the door. The day before the wedding, more than ten people from the groom's family will go to the bride's house to pick her up. There will be a drummer band, people setting off firecrackers, some carrying sedan chairs, and some burning incense (they have to go to the bride's ancestral hall, temple, or commune to burn incense), and one person will carry the burden. There is a lead chicken (one male and one female) on one end, wine and pineapple on the other. A woman has to bring the bride's clothes, and two people carry wooden baskets, and they have to carry fish, meat, wine, and cakes. , cigarettes, firecrackers, candles, etc., the matchmaker will also go. Some grooms will go, some will not. If the groom goes with him, the groom will also have to make a sedan chair. The one who sets off the firecrackers is the man's plenipotentiary, and he will bring one or twenty red envelopes with him. indivual.

After arriving at the bride’s house, the bride-to-be will first have snacks, and then two members of the bride’s family will take them to the ancestral hall to burn incense and pay homage to their ancestors. The girl's family will host a banquet at noon or evening.

The bride usually leaves in the middle of the night or at midnight, and the sky becomes brighter as she goes, symbolizing her move towards the light. If she goes out at night, she will not encounter unlucky things such as carrying a coffin. In the front of the wedding procession are the lantern players, followed by the music players, the sedan chair is in the middle, and behind are the people receiving the bride.

When the bride arrives at the groom's house, if it has not yet arrived at the stipulated entry time, she must wait on the square at the gate or in the house next to the door. Entrance is usually at seven or eight or eight or nine in the morning, and some even have to wait until noon. At the entrance moment, the bride has to kick the sedan door, and the groom's bridesmaid will lead the bride out of the sedan, and then "cross the fire" at the gate. The bride steps over the fire made of fir branches before entering the gate.

Prayer

After the bride enters the hall amidst the sound of drums, she begins to worship. The incense table is arranged in the hall, with parents and elders standing on the east side, relatives on the west side, relatives on the north side, and juniors on the south side. Before the ceremony, the bridegroom's wife should hang a red cloth on the groom's body with a five-foot-long red cloth.

Recite: "Holding a red flag five feet long in hand, I use it to pretend to be the groom. I will pretend that the groom will give birth to a son, and if he gives birth to a son early, he will be the number one scholar." When worshiping, the groom stands on the left and the bride stands on the right. The rituals are: first, worship the heaven and earth, secondly, worship the ancestors, thirdly, worship the high hall, and fourthly, the husband and wife worship each other.

Finally, relatives meet and give red envelopes to the bride.

After the ceremony, the bridesmaid leads the bride into the bridal chamber with a red bow, and the bride and groom scatter wedding candies from the door to the hall amidst the sound of firecrackers. Then the bride and groom have a cup of wine. The bridesmaid held a chicken on a tray and said while serving wine: "Reunion is a perfect match, a beautiful couplet", "Avalokitesvara sends a son, and a child will be born early"; "Husband and wife are reconciled and grow old together". (This etiquette is no longer common in the Meizhou area and has been replaced by modern wedding models)

Have a banquet at noon, have a wedding banquet, use loud cannons to invite guests, fire them every half an hour, and fire them when the banquet begins. Three rings. Then the etiquette will give a list of names, and there will be two seats at each table. According to their seniority and closeness, they will be arranged to sit at the table first, and then the others will sit at their leisure. Male and female guests sit separately, and the bride and groom go to the table to toast.

House riots

One type of quarrel is in the hall, the other is in the new house, and there are also riots in the hall first and then in the new house. During the riot, firecrackers were set off every few minutes until midnight.

Returning door

Also called "revolving door". Usually on the third or fifth day after the wedding, the woman sends the bride’s sisters and other female family members to invite the bride and groom to be guests together. The matchmaker and the groom’s sisters also go with them. There are 7-14 people. After lunch, the wedding will be held on the same day. return.

Giving a full moon. One month after the wedding, the bride's family will come to give a full moon, and at the same time they will bring chickens, vegetables, seeds, grain seeds, beans, etc. to indicate a bumper harvest and a prosperous fortune.