Mel: Those things about going home for the New Year.

I haven't been home for the Spring Festival for three years in a row.

Why? Because my dad asked me to have a blind date at home during the 20 15 Spring Festival, I refused. My father was furious and called me "brainless" and "stupid in reading". I retorted a few words, and my dad said he would hit me.

I was so sad that I wanted to break up with my father in a rage. But I don't know how to break it.

I left in the fourth grade that year. When I left, I swore that I wouldn't come back for the New Year unless I mixed myself up. In the next three years, I kept my promise and really didn't go back for the New Year.

At first, I didn't want to go back in anger. I think I want to "cure" my father. Who made him so fierce? I am very disappointed in him. He always shows his authority and uses violence.

Later, I didn't want to go back for the New Year, but I felt that I was alone in Beijing for the New Year. I wanted to be comfortable and happy. During the Chinese New Year, I stayed alone in Beijing, ate with my friends, read what I wrote, and sometimes went out for a stroll. It's really leisurely. Except that I was a little sad on New Year's Eve, I was in good shape at ordinary times.

Moreover, it is difficult to get tickets when going home in the New Year. Finally, I went back, the atmosphere at home was depressed, I felt heavy, and I had to bear the pressure of urging marriage. The contradiction intensifies, and the temper comes up. What should my father do if he is dizzy? Just to be safe, I'd better not go back.

But in the Spring Festival of 20 19, I went home.

I am not poor, so it has nothing to do with clothes returning to China.

I don't want to go back, but I promised to attend my college classmate Stefanie's wedding and be her maid of honor. Her wedding was held not far from my home, on New Year's Eve. Then it seems a bit unreasonable that I only attend her wedding and don't go home for the New Year.

And my mother asks every day: Did you get the ticket?

I said I couldn't get it. It has been robbed. My mother was so anxious that she mobilized her relatives and friends to help me grab tickets. I suddenly felt a little sad and felt cruel. Isn't it just to go home next year and make mom happy? Why not?

Coupled with the urging of my sister and two nieces, I feel that I can't carry it anymore. My two nieces have a good relationship with me. They are all looking forward to my return and taking them to eat, drink and have fun when they have a holiday. If I don't go back, won't those two children be disappointed?

After careful consideration, I finally got up the courage and decided to buy a ticket to go home.

My hometown is in Nanyang, and the tickets from Beijing to Nanyang have long been robbed. There are only a few hard seats, and I dare not sit with a bad waist.

I robbed the high-speed train ticket from Beijing to Luoyang and took the high-speed train to Luoyang first. I stayed at Hanting Hotel near Luoyang Railway Station for one night, and the next day I went to Nanyang by train, and then took a bus from Nanyang to our inner town. Then I took my brother's car in the county seat and went back to my hometown in the village together ... it was really frustrating.

It was the 29th day of the twelfth lunar month when I got home. After going home through all kinds of hardships, my mother was very happy and made us stew. Just stew the meat and vegetables together. It is delicious.

You look hungry?

The next day is thirty. Wash vegetables, chop stuffing, and wrap jiaozi with my mother. Sticking Spring Festival couplets and going to the grave are two tasks that my brother completed.

Our family's New Year's Eve dinner is jiaozi stuffed with mutton and radish, which is very fragrant.

During the Spring Festival, I accompanied several children to play with the car on the road in the village. The children are very happy. I didn't think I was crazier than they were. This is also the most interesting entertainment I think during the Chinese New Year. Sometimes it is easy to be happy without spending a lot of money.

As an adult, I am glad that the children are willing to take me to play with them. At least it shows that I am not a rigid and boring adult.

My nephew Xiao Fei helped me push the tornado. It was fun.

My niece Fanfan and my niece Lele, I led their crooked car with a rope, which was really a walk.

The first afternoon, I left my hometown. My brother sent us to Nanyang City, and I took my sister and two nieces to Zaoyang, Hubei Province nearby, to attend the wedding of Stefanie Wang, a college classmate.

My sister Sensen, my niece Tian Tian and Fanfan, I took them out to play.

Stefanie Wang's wedding was held on the third day of the Lunar New Year. Dozens of relatives from her family have come, and there are many relatives from the groom's family. The wedding was very lively. Wish the swallow a happy life!

A sumptuous wedding banquet

After attending the swallow's wedding, I returned to Nanyang with several children. We ate hot pot together, sang songs and had a good time.

I'm happy to see them so happy.

On the sixth day, my sister also came back, and we took sweets to see a doctor together. There is a hemangioma on my sweet tongue. My cousin introduced a doctor in a downtown hospital and said that he had a good effect in treating this disease.

Many people in the hospital are really "overcrowded".

After seeing Tian Tian, my sister took them back to their hometown. I stayed in the downtown hotel for two days to deal with some work tasks. The hotel is in good condition. It's too cold to go back to my hometown, shivering with cold, and I don't want to play with my mobile phone.

It is said that I went home for the New Year. As a matter of fact, I have been living in a hotel from grade one to grade nine. I don't have to face the problem of relatives urging marriage, which is quite relaxing.

Then I went back to my hometown for a few days to show you what our mountain village looks like.

This photo was taken standing on the roof of my house, and the mountain village was shrouded in fog.

This photo was taken standing on the back hill of our village.

The wheat seedlings are green and spring is coming.

I spent the Lantern Festival on the fifteenth day of the first month on the plane that night.

Back to Beijing on the 16th of the first month, the Spring Festival.

In my hometown, I eat three meals a day on time, and there are many delicious foods every day. I am a ketogenic diet lover now, and I have been insisting on it for half a year, that is, I usually eat less carbohydrates (such as rice flour candy) and don't have to take any diet pills. Of course, the effect is there. When I got home, my family said that I had lost weight, and I did lose more than ten kilograms in half a year. But I tried to make ketone, not only to lose weight, but also to prevent diabetes.

My grandmother, my mother, I have diabetes during menstruation, and I have to inject insulin every day. I'm afraid of diabetes, so I care about sugar control. Every day, I never tire of telling my mother and my sister to eat less pasta and more eggs. Once I found that two nieces ate too much sugar, so I began to give them a "lesson" to eat less sugar.

I used to drink coke sprite, so I can buy a big bottle to drink with me when I eat. Later, I gained a lot of weight at once, and all the body fat scales I bought warned me that the visceral fat index was high, which aroused my vigilance and made up my mind to change my eating habits.

When I was in Beijing, I didn't have to face so many food temptations and insisted on producing ketone well. As soon as I returned to my hometown, I put the delicious food in front of me, and my self-control declined. This tells me that people's willpower is very fragile. Don't test their willpower, but try to avoid the source of temptation.

I talked to my mother once about urging marriage.

I said, if you want to get married, you can buy me a car or a house first. If you can't afford anything, don't worry. It is ok to give career support. If you can't give any support, it is standard behavior to urge marriage. If you push them again, you'll have to raise them out of depression. If they can afford it, that's good. Don't let children bear all the pressure of gene transmission. After listening, my mother was silent.

I told my mother that I am a rural girl with no background and resources, and it is already very stressful to work hard alone in a big city. Life is not easy. I cried many times outside when I was sad, and I silently endured it. When you go home, you have to face the doubts and pressures of your family, and you have to be sincere and fearful. Is this home really a "warm harbor"?

I also told my mother that if you really want to help me, if you have money, you can give me more money to spend and come back and make me something delicious. That's all. I made it clear that urging marriage will only give me pressure, disturb my mind and wisdom, and can't give me any help. If you make it so clear and rush me, you are hurting me.

I really think some parents are just fooling their children, and you can't help them. Please don't stop them.

There is one thing that makes me feel very sad during the Chinese New Year. I added a WeChat group, which is full of girls who are forced to get married and dare not go home. They stayed in a hotel and spent the New Year alone in a foreign land. Although they are a little lonely, it is better to spend the New Year outside than to be rejected by relatives at home. Other girls divorced, and their parents refused to go back to their parents' home for the New Year, saying it was unlucky.

I wonder what these parents think. Are their hearts fleshy? Your child is hurt. As parents, it's too late to feel uncomfortable. How can you drive them away?

There is another sad thing: parents are getting older and older. Looking at their aging faces, my heart is full of pain, but there is nothing I can do. When I think about my parents' pension in the future, I feel that I have to work hard to make money, otherwise how can I fulfill my obligations in the future?

People's bodies will get older and older, which is difficult to reverse. But earn more money, take them to play while their parents are alive, buy them good things to use, and when they are sick, they can afford a doctor and a hospital. This is what we can do as children.

I don't advocate absolutely obedient filial piety, which seems to me to be a kind of foolish filial piety. What I advocate is that children should live in their own way, let themselves live happily first, and then give their parents love. If you listen to your parents and lead a miserable life, how can you love your parents?

In fact, I have a grudge against my parents, and I think they are not enlightened parents. However, seeing them grow old, sadness replaces resentment. I think, I should strive to surpass, don't stop complaining, but try to make myself a stronger person and sublimate to another realm.

One day I read Weibo written by the writer Yan Lingyang and had an epiphany. Her family is a real mess. She said that she had surpassed it. I also want to surpass it.

When chatting with friends, I talked about a line in the Korean drama Ghost that made me cry:

King said: "Sometimes parents, children and fraternity become each other's diners."

I said to my friend, "If our parents can't be our sponsors, then we will try to be our own sponsors." . Then maybe you can be their patron saint. At that time, our hearts had changed a long time ago and would not be so fragile as they are now. Work hard for this goal. "

My friend agrees that she has the same troubles as me.

Maybe our parents don't accept "failing us", but I will try my best to let them know what true affection is.

Now there are many "life mentors" who always make you accept and love your family. If you don't accept them, they will say that you are narrow-minded and really annoying.

Acceptance requires ability, and ability needs to be cultivated slowly. The most important thing is to let yourself accept yourself first, and then talk about other things.

You're kidding me when you let a man with inner pain accept his family. Even though we are strong, we can't accept our family. This is our freedom. Voluntary acceptance means that we have reached that state, not forced.

Anyway, my attitude is that if you don't like your home, then you don't like it. Try to stay away from it, let yourself live well and have fun first.

If they are all negative energy, being together will only hurt each other. Stay away and let yourself grow. When you truly feel the beauty of life and your own strength, the harm of your family may be nothing to you.

Or if you upgrade directly, you become a god, and you are too lazy to care about them, then you can really accept it.

Just like me now, I dare not say that I can be calm in the face of my family. I just realized something on the ideological level, and it takes a long time to accept the real action, so I can't wait.

Also, the most substantial thing during the Spring Festival: During the Spring Festival, members of our writing group continue to watch movies, read and write, and often discuss in groups, so that the Chinese New Year and study are both correct. All play is meaningless, and learning makes people feel at ease.

The new year has begun, let's cheer together!