Who is the painter who takes the most selfies in the world?

Fei Ming's self-portrait.

Knowing yourself is not an easy task, and it even takes a long process.

When I was a child, because my family was poor and I didn't have parents to take care of me, I was looked down upon by some people and felt quite inferior. There are even some people with rich eyes who think I am ugly because I don't dress well. At that stage, my perception of myself was inaccurate. When someone hates me and says I don't look good, I go home and look in the mirror, but the mirror can't give me the answer, because I didn't know what beauty was at that time.

I remember that when learning to paint, the school couldn't afford a model, and the students took turns to be models. When I was a model, a teacher drew a portrait of me. As soon as I saw it, he painted me as a village woman. I immediately felt that the teacher was up to no good, or maybe he was teasing him. Later, the teacher held an exhibition and my classmates asked me to go. I declined, I don't want to get close to this person who intentionally or unintentionally slandered me. His behavior is a kind of harm to me in adolescence. My understanding of myself is that although it is not beautiful, it is not ugly.

Some self-portraits taken by mobile phones.

The first time I felt beautiful, it was Teacher Zhang Shuguang who drew an oil painting head for me. Once again, it's my turn to be a model. Teacher Zhang Shuguang set up an easel and painted with her classmates. At the end of the day, he painted me vividly and beautifully. I think he should beautify me. I like this portrait very much, but the next day, it disappeared for no reason. Teacher Zhang Shuguang even suspected that I had it.

A teacher painted me ugly, and a teacher painted me beautiful. And I, what is it?

At that time, there was a boy named Lao Wei who studied painting together. We once teamed up to play in Jiangang Reservoir. Lao Wei took the initiative to take pictures of me and developed them for me. I looked miserable when he handed me the photo. I said it was ugly, so I tore it. My behavior embarrassed him. The act of tearing up the photo shows that I don't recognize me in the photo. This photo shows me that my frown is ugly, so I won't knit it. Laughter is a choice in life.

This is a restored photo. At that time, I gave it away because I didn't think it looked good. That man has been treasured until now. I occasionally see it, think it looks good and want to come back. There is really a big difference between the past aesthetics and the present aesthetics. Thanks to that person, it has been stored for more than 20 years and has not been thrown away.

Teacher Zhang Peifeng, who taught me how to operate a computer, patted me with concern and said, You must be very sad. This may be revealed in temperament, and the expression can't be concealed.

I grew up without parents, brothers and sisters and relatives to take care of me. Apart from my grandparents, I have nothing, and it is inevitable that I will be bullied by all kinds of people. When teacher Zhang Peifeng woke me up, after I had all kinds of abilities, I didn't care about everything in my childhood. My facial expression is clear when everything becomes a cloud.

The ugly duckling finally grew into a white swan. The previous inferiority complex is actually a process of constant denial and correction.

I love myself, and I drew a self-portrait of myself at that time-quietly examining myself and getting along with myself, loneliness is inevitable, imperfection is inevitable, and I need to improve myself. Although painting is lonely, it is full of enjoyment.

This self-portrait was accidentally taken by Mr. Cha Hong Bing in his old yard. After more than 20 years, he won many photography awards. The reason why I used this photo is not because it looks good, but because I think this one is the most like me.

I changed the background to Swan Lake, and there was a swan in the distance, calling mom and dad-this should be the truest reflection in my heart.

Many painters paint self-portraits, which is not narcissism. Self-portrait is actually a monologue from the heart. Draw your own appearance, as well as the appearance of spirit and soul. This is an inward exploration of myself, where I come from, where I want to go and what kind of person I want to be. These are all very important questions. These problems will be expressed by thinking and painting in the process of drawing self-portraits.

I once exposed the painting process of this self-portrait on the Internet. From painting to framing, there has always been a voice: painting is not as good as photos, and photos are not as good as themselves. I can't believe the photos are not as good as mine. How can I look better than when I was young? This is unlikely. People should have self-knowledge, no matter how praised by others, they should understand a truth: now I am close to knowing my destiny, and I can slowly return.

The painting is not as beautiful as the photo, but it is possible. Ms. Dong Aiyun commented that the people in the painting lacked some flavor. She said that the eyes in the photo are very special and have a hazy beauty, but I didn't draw this beauty.

I am quite satisfied with this self-portrait. Appreciating the original painting is different from looking at the selfie. It may be that there is something wrong with the shooting technology and equipment, and it is slightly deformed and discolored.

Van Gogh painted about 40 self-portraits in his life. I think I will paint self-portraits again in the future and wander in colorful colors. I am very happy to explore my true self.

end

Editor: Zhang

About the author:

Fei Ming, young painter, middle-aged writer, member of Henan Writers Association.